Mollywood (18 page)

I blinked at her uncanny assessment of what I’d been going through…what I thought I’d been hiding so well. I stammered in response. “I…I’m just trying to keep from stressing you out.”

“Your attempt to ‘not stressing me out’?
It’s
stressing
me out.” Staring pointedly into my eyes, she seemed to be searching for some answer to an undefined question. I was uncomfortable with the way she seemed to see through me. My need to break the tension overwhelmed me, and I pulled her into an explorative kiss. I wanted to take her mind off of this pointless argument…and off of me. She sighed deeply, breathing into me through our kiss. Her body seemed to resonate with relief against mine. She returned the kiss tenfold, and the taste of vanilla and spice on her tongue caught me off guard. The flavor had been Jess’s favorite as well, but it tasted so different on Molly. Her tongue softly grazed mine, and minutes later we were escalating in a deliciously familiar direction. Unable and unwilling to tap the breaks, I swept her off her feet and carried her down the hall.

“Joe, you’re gonna hurt yourself.” Her cheeks reddened, and I realized she seriously thought lifting her was pressing my limits.

“Baby, I have boots that weigh more than you.” My dismissive response didn’t seem to convince her.

Once in our bedroom, I placed her on her feet and grabbed handfuls of the pale orange material of her dress. It was soft to the touch, like a well broken in t-shirt, and the color reminded me of the icy treats my mother used to buy from the ice cream man.

“You’re wearing way too many clothes.” My voice sounded husky, and the flirtatious curl of her lips awoke the beast within me. “Arms up.”

She blinked up at me from under her dark lashes, and her eyes glittered with heated promise. Her face, neck, and chest rapidly flushed a pretty shade of pink. However, she immediately did as she was told. Molly Hildebrandt
hated
to be told what to do. The only exception
seemed to be
in the bedroom. This had been one hell of a discovery, and a hell of a lot of fun to explore. Sex with Molly was an athletic experience from the get-go. She had more of a libido than most guys in their heyday, and I considered myself a very lucky man.

My girl also had a kinky side. She liked things a bit rough a lot of the time, and after a great deal of coaxing, I’d proceeded cautiously down that road with her. I had concerns due to her violent experiences with her ex and trepidation not knowing where her boundaries were. Now there was the pregnancy to consider as well, and I was even more leery about playing rough. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her.

When it came to sex, Molly wasn’t afraid to ask for what she wanted. She was a far cry from submissive. She gave as well as she got, and had no problem taking control of me whenever the mood took her.

I slowly stripped off her dress and made short work of removing her bra. Her incredible breasts were even larger now, and her erect nipples a darker shade of red. She looked a bit uncomfortable as my eyes wandered over her changing figure, and she actually moved her hands up as if to cover herself. Before I knew what I was doing, my hands were entangled in her hair and I backed her slowly against the bed.

“Don’t even think about it.” I growled, between greedy kisses. I lowered her carefully onto the bed. “I
want
to look at you, do you understand me?”

She nodded mutely, and I sat up, letting my eyes wander over her flawless pale flesh. It had pinked with her arousal and her porcelain curves made my mouth water. She was perfection and I trailed kisses from her thick dark hair framing her expressive pale eyes to the tips of her pink polished toes.

“Joe…” She giggled and squirmed. A bashful look transformed her face, making her look surprisingly young. “You’re giving me a complex. Get up here and kiss me “

“You’re perfect.” I traced my finger from the hollow of her neck to her naval, which sparkled with a tiny diamond.

She rolled her eyes and cocked a dark brow. “You’re out of your damn mind. My belly looks like a volleyball.”

“If you think you’re any
less
beautiful to me carrying my children,
you’re
out of
your
damn mind.” I replied, dropping onto one elbow. She tried to look away, but I tilted her chin so that she could see my sincerity. “Kiss me, baby girl.”

She pulled my mouth to hers, and her lips captured mine. The heat between us flared white hot as always, and I felt my tension simply roll away with each kiss and caress. We made love, naturally adapting to her transforming body. I was slow and careful with her, forcing her to ask me for faster, harder, more. Soon she cried out louder and shuddered harder than I’d ever seen. Watching her face as she came was the biggest fucking turn-on, and knowing she was satisfied, I relaxed and succumbed to her.

We lay in comfortable silence, and I felt more connected to her than I had in weeks, maybe months. I must have drifted off because I woke to find myself spooning her. Smiling, I reached across her and placed my hand on the spot where our babies nestled within her. Rolling over to face me, Molly’s expression was complex and pensive as she regarded me in silence. Reaching down, she took my hand off of her womb and pulled it to her lips, kissing my knuckles.

“I want you to make an appointment for us to go see Dr. Greene together.” She said. I felt my brow wrinkle, but she pushed on before I could respond. “I know he’s your doctor, but I think it is important for me to at least talk to him. For
us
to talk to him. We can’t keep going on like this.”

“Like what? I thought things were better.” The look she gave me made me realize that I hadn’t been fooling her at all. It just proved that she knew me better than anyone else did.

“Don’t. Just don’t. Pretending like everything is okay isn’t working. Fake it until you make it doesn’t work with kids, and it won’t work with me. I need us to be able to deal with things openly. Isn’t that what you want?”

My throat had been tightening the more she talked. It felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest, it was so hard to breathe. I flipped up to sit on the side of the bed and leaned forward, hoping not to hyperventilate. Molly moved up behind me and her hand caressed my back. Her gentle touch calmed the demon that was shaking the bars of his cage inside my head. She was right, I couldn’t keep doing this. And I needed honesty. After all the lies and the secrets Jessica kept from me, the last thing I wanted was to go down that path with Molly. It was long past time we went to see the doc.

“He asked me to bring you a while back.” I admitted, looking over my shoulder at her. “But we’ve both been so busy…”

I stopped. That was a lie. I wouldn’t lie like that. Not to her. I took a shuddering breath. “I thought you’d be pissed.”

“Why would I be pissed?” She was up on her knees behind me, which put us eye to eye. A crease appeared between her eyebrows. Unwilling to look into her eyes when I confessed my real motivation, I turned away.

“I didn’t want you to think I thought you needed therapy.” I spoke the words quietly, and waited for an explosion. Instead, she wrapped her arms around my neck and resting her chin on my shoulder. She pressed her velvety cheek against mine. When she spoke, I could feel her jaw move against my bare flesh.

“Of course I need therapy.” Her voice was like silk, but her words sounded firm, reticent. “
We all
need therapy. Baby,
promise
me you’ll call him. I don’t care about the schedule. It doesn’t matter when he’s avalable, set up and appointment and I’ll clear my schedule.”

We spent the rest of the afternoon together curled up on the bed. I talked into her bellybutton for a while to see if I could make the babies kick and it seemed to have the opposite effect. Then Molly crafted us some chili and cornbread and we ate it on the couch, spending the remainder of the evening searching Realtor.com for new listings. I never made it back down to the shop, but I figured now was as good a time as any for the boys to get used to me being gone more.

The next morning I called Dr. Greene’s office, figuring I would get an appointment in a day or so. The receptionist put me on hold and then came back on the line to inform me that we were set for a one o’clock appointment that same day.

“Ahhh…” I stammered.

“Is that too soon?”

“No. No…it’s fine.”

“The doctor asked if you’ll be bringing a guest.”

I covered my face with my hand, wondering what the fallout of this meeting of the minds might be. “Tell him that she’ll be with me.”

All day long I worried about what might come out during the session and why Dr. Greene wanted me to bring Molly. By the time Molly and I were getting ready to leave the apartment, I was really keyed up. I think she might have been, too. She grew quieter as the minutes passed, and though I was waiting for her with keys in hand she was dawdling and moody. We nearly got into it when she refused to put on her winter jacket, even though it was drizzling rain and windy as hell outside.

“Molly. Your coat.”

“I’m good.”

“
Now
you are. In ten minutes you’ll be freezing and I’ll have to give you
my
coat.” I put my hands on my hips and tilted my head.

“Oh, alright.” She mumbled and disappeared into the bedroom. She returned, shrugging into a heavy sweater. “Satisfied?”

“Baby girl, you can’t wear flip-flops. It’s November.” I folded my arms and glanced at my watch.

“But they’re cozy.” She complained, with a sigh, kicking them off.

Thirty minutes later, we walked into Dr. Greene’s reception area hand in hand. Molly looked as nervous as I felt, her cheeks all flush with her dewy pregnancy glow. She was wearing one of my flannel shirts and it hung low over her maternity jeans which she’d stuffed into some crazy looking, furry boots just to spite me. They looked like they were made of a skinned raccoon and came all the way up to her knees.

I couldn’t decide if having her with me was making me anxious or if I was just anxious. Her long hair fell loose over her shoulders like chocolate waves, and I stroked it nervously as we sat waiting our turn. I did this a lot. It was a nervous habit, my treating her like a security blanket, or a prized stuffed animal. My eyes scanned the empty waiting room, and I noticed the receptionist, typically a very icy individual, eyeing Molly’s protruding belly, and smiling.

“So, are you excited for Friday?” Molly asked. I looked at her blankly and after about three seconds of confusion, I realized she was referring to the upcoming ultrasound.

“Oh. Yeah.” I murmured, and she slowly blinked at me.

“Yeah. I can tell.” She scoffed, and turned away to pick up a magazine from the table next to her.

“Molly.” I admonished, and she huffed and dropped the magazine onto her lap. She looked sideways at me, her annoyance as obvious as the stud in her nose. “I am. It’s just all a bit weird with you here. My worlds are colliding, that’s all. I’m distracted, not disinterested.”

She nodded thoughtfully, and the receptionist’s phone beeped. She carried on a quiet conversation, then hung up and turned to us.

“Dr. Greene will see you now.” She said, and I led Molly into his office. The doc stood up the minute we entered the room, and I felt a tug as Molly, who was still holding my hand, slowed her step

‘Hello, Molly.” Dr. Greene wore a sheepish grin. Molly narrowed her eyes at him, obviously surprised that she’d met him many times before. She put a hand on her hip and then shook her head with a bemused smile.

“Will.” She replied and then followed up in a mocking tone. “Or should I call you Dr. Greene?”

“Why start now?” His retort was swift and their familiar timing reminded me of vaudevillian actors. When Molly and I first started seeing each other, I’d recommended that Dr. Greene try her food. Since then, he’d informed me that he’d been back many times. He’d never revealed his identity to her, doctor/patient confidentiality I assumed, and I figured where he chose to eat was his business, so I never mentioned it to Molly.

“Well…now that we have
that
out of the way...” I muttered, and instead of taking my usual seat next to his desk, I sat down on the couch with her.

“I’m glad Joe finally asked you to come.” Dr. Greene came around the desk, leaving his trusty notebook closed and untouched. I could feel the tension in my jaw as I felt Molly’s eyes on me.

“He didn’t invite me.” Molly replied, her disappointment blatant. “I
asked
to come.”

“Very well.” The doc’s telling sigh almost made me wince. Molly’s eyes flicked from him to me and then away again. “What’s brings you in, Molly.”

She fidgeted a bit and looked from me to him. “I want to start off by saying things were good. They weren’t perfect, but neither of us would’ve trusted perfect anyway.”

“
Were
? Past tense?” Dr. Greene asked, focusing on Molly. I saw her nod in my peripheral vision.

“Before this.” She indicated to her baby bump as if she were discussing an unfortunate grape juice spill on a snow white carpet. “Joe and I were figuring our shit out. We’d moved from the ‘everything’s perfect’ phase to the ‘how the hell do we fit this puzzle together’ phase. But that’s real life. We were working out how to be Molly and Joe. We had fights, pretty regularly…but that’s normal, right?”

Dr. Greene shrugged in a non-committal manner as if he considered the question rhetorical.

“Then it all stopped. When we found out about the babies.”

“What stopped?” He asked, and I turned to look at her in surprise. I couldn’t believe how easily she spoke to the doctor. Much more easily than she spoke to me, that was for damn sure. She furrowed her brow apologetically, and looked away.

Apprehension was plastered on her face, but she pressed on. “The progress.”

“We shifted gears.” I offered, as if this explained all of our issues in one phrase. Deep inside the back of my brain something nervously stirred. “It’s understandable. We found out about the babies and our focus changed.”

“You’ve completely checked out on me, Joe.” Molly turned, adjusting herself on the couch so she was able to face me head on.