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“Not when you give me reasons like those. I can't do that to you.”

“Shit. I don't think I can be here with the two of you and have you love me. I always wanted a threesome so there'd be more of everything. More touching, more fucking, and more pain when it was over— every time reminding me I could never have anyone more than once, reminding me there'd be more pain the longer I knew someone, the closer I got.”

Matthew's hands stilled their caresses. “Have we caused you pain?”

“God, no. It's why I needed something physical. I nearly exploded without it. In the end, the only hurt came from hearing my father tell me what I feared— that I'd lose you. The closer we got, the more I knew I'd lose in the end. I always lose in the end.”

Richard gripped my shoulders. He shook me. “Not this time. We aren't letting you destroy us or yourself.”

I let my head fall to his shoulder. “But he'll show you. He'll show you who I am.”

“We already see you.”

Matthew kissed the back of my neck. “And we love you.”

I took the soft kisses they planted all over my body and accepted them into my mouth, hungry for them. “I need you. Don't let me leave.”

Richard kissed me and wrenched the three of us around until we lay on the bed, my back pressing into the mattress, his body covering mine. “You don't want to leave, and we're not letting you go.”

“No,” Matthew said. “No one's going. Staying. Together.” His mouth explored my neck, my ears, my chin, my lips.

A fire raged inside me. Every touch of tongue, skin, hand, cock sent desire through me. I wanted them, needed them like never before.

Lost in the pleasure, the touches, I didn't worry about returning the affections. I let them consume me, show me everything I'd have missed if I had left, if I had fucked up.

They tortured me with sensations until I couldn't stand it any longer. My control shattered. No one touched me where I craved it most. I needed them to take me, fill me. “Please.”

Matthew slid up my body. “Make love to me?”

I ran my hands through his dark hair and brought our mouths together, pleading the words over his lips. “Yes, Matthew. I need to be inside you. You feel amazing around me, under me, like no one before you, ever.”

Matthew rolled onto his back and brought me with him.

I reached for Richard and kissed him. “No one fills me like you do. No one makes me feel alive like you do.”

He moved closer. “The way you want me, the way you need, you both still drive me as crazy as the first night.” He wasn't the only one.

He reached for the lube and handed it to me. I slicked it into Matthew, using extra. I didn't want to touch my dick with it. I wanted Matthew's body to be the next touch to give me pleasure. I raised his legs and leaned over him, ready to enter his body, when Matthew put a hand on my lower abdomen, stopping me. The uncertainty in his dark eyes broke my heart.

“I swear, Matthew, I didn't. I've only been with you two since I moved in here. Hell, since the first night at the club.”

His expression relaxed, and his hand moved from my tense stomach muscles to my face. “I believe you. I do. I just needed to hear it again.”

“Are you sure?” Richard asked. “You shouldn't let him go bare unless you feel like you can trust him.”

“I do trust Luke. And I trust you. If you didn't think he was telling the truth, you wouldn't let him do me like this.”

Richard ran a hand along his jaw. “No, I wouldn't.”

My arms shook with the despair. I lowered my head and choked out the words. “Can you forgive me?”

Richard lifted my chin with one strong finger. “Already have. You didn't do anything. You stopped yourself. You called us.”

“Uh-huh.” Matthew rocked his hips, and my cock pushed into him. I groaned. To be so accepted, so wanted, it meant more than having the love of my parents, than having the pain I thought I needed.

I sank the rest of the way into him. Words flowed out of me, ripped through me like a tidal wave I couldn't dream of stopping. “I don't want anyone else to touch me. To fuck. To love me. No one but you.”

I rocked in and out of Matthew's body, and after a few thrusts, Richard pushed into me. Perfect, right, simple. Nothing to run from.

And everything to fight for.

I awoke the next morning to two warm bodies surrounding me, arms holding me, lips still touching my skin.

I lifted my head and eyed the clock. Late. Not surprising for me, but Richard never slept in. The night before must have exhausted him as much as it had me. Then a thought pressed in through the sleepy haze.

I slipped out of the bed and threw on a pair of jeans. I descended the basement steps and opened the door to the small bedroom.

There were no chains affixed to the bed. No handcuffs. No ropes or ties in the cabinet. The only remaining evidence of the steel loops were the small holes on the walls and floor. The solitary remnant of bondage was the bench. Probably because Matthew loved it. He liked the way it forced us to be close and hold on to one another.

I sat on the bench.

“We're done with the restraints.” Richard stood in the doorway. He wore briefs and nothing else. Tension clung to every muscle.

“I think I am too.” I glanced around the room again and nodded. “It's done.”

He sat next to me and breathed deep. “I'm glad we're in agreement.” He looked away for a moment before continuing. “If I had thought you liked getting hit, getting flogged, that you wanted it, got off on it, then I might have done it. I think I would've liked it, knowing it made you hard, knowing you wanted to submit like that.”

“Bullshit. That isn't you. Besides, I was asking for all the wrong reasons. I knew you'd say no, even then.”

“Maybe you're right. I just... I want to be what you need.”

“You are. I always thought letting myself care about someone again would hurt. Not just because I'd lose him, but because caring would be painful.” I met his stare. “It isn't. Trying to leave you two. That was... it was impossible.”

“As it should be.” He bumped his shoulder with mine. “Did telling us about your father help?”

“Yeah. It doesn't feel as big now.”

“That's because you have us.” Matthew stood where Richard had been a moment before. He walked in and knelt in front of me. “What happened to you isn't a fear you should carry around. Like my dad and Richard's Gregg. They are pains of the past. Not what define our future together. What your father said fifteen years ago doesn't mean shit now.”

Said the kid who was eight at the time. How did he get so damn wise? I stroked his face with the back of my hand in a reverent touch. “When Richard talked about us getting together, he worried you were too young, like you hadn't been hurt by life. But you have. You just didn't let it change you. You kept laughing, kept living. You're a strong man, Matthew Stewart. What if I can't be that strong?”

Richard rubbed a hand over my back. “You're here. You're staying with us. You're living. Try and let yourself enjoy it.”

“I was enjoying it— you, us, everything— until he called here. I always thought by living by my own rules I wasn't letting him control my life. But until I met you, he controlled everything.” I stood. “Well, it's going to stop. I want us to move in here. Right now.”

They smiled up at me.

I tugged on an arm of each man. “Let's go enjoy our life.”

Richard made a few calls and reserved a small moving truck for the next day. He and I skipped out on work, and the three of us spent the day filling the truck, first with the contents of Matthew's old room at his mom's, and then the rest of my stuff from Walter's. We were fierce in our determination to pack, move, and unpack every single item from our separate lives and bring them together. Richard even insisted we rearrange the living room entertainment center so Matthew could set up his Xbox where he'd be able play it more.

As we went about the move, I could not stop touching them. Every time one of them walked by me with a box in hand, I groped, tickled, patted, caressed. I'd finally found a peace that allowed me to accept them as I'd never done before.

By the end of the day, we were sweaty, grouchy, exhausted, and utterly pleased. We ended the night in the tub with Richard at one end, me at the other, and Matthew stretched out between us.

Despite the exhaustion settling in my bones, I wanted them, needed them, in any way they'd give me. I lifted a leg and slipped it between Matthew's thighs. The pads of my toes scraped along his flesh. He didn't jerk or startle at my touch. He raised his eyelids and smiled over at me, as at ease with physical contact as ever.

I pondered that as my toes inched toward his balls. His father had been violent with him. The man had taken his penchant for drink and let the numbness and callousness of alcohol give him a reason to beat down his own son. Despite it all, Matthew had managed to grow into a sensual man with a smile on his face and a laugh in his soul. I'd never take him for granted.

The smile on Matthew's face faded, though, as the sincere look of desire and arousal replaced it. He leaned his head back to Richard's shoulder. My foot caressed him, enticed him with a sample of what I wanted for the rest of the short night.

He let out a soft moan.

Richard sighed. “No way, you two. I'm tired.”

My smile widened. Matthew's cock grew fuller with each touch. I had no idea my feet were talented when it came to arousing. He moaned louder and shifted in Richard's arms.

“I'm serious,” Richard said. “The two of you may not have had a lot of shit, but it still took all damn day.”

“Oh, big strong Richard with all those muscles is too tired for sex?” I said.

“For once, I think I might be. And don't give me crap about my muscles. You two didn't carry as much as I did. I still think we could have waited until next weekend and had more time.” He had said the same statement four times during the course of the move. He never meant it. Once I'd made my declaration in the basement the day before, none of us could wait one more day.

“Uh-huh,” Matthew said. He inched forward and snaked a hand behind his back.

With Matthew's touch, Richard's tense brow relaxed. He tipped his head back to rest on the edge of the tub, his hips moving.

Focused on Richard's reactions, I missed Matthew's other movement until his foot fondled my balls. His explorations had me aching in no time.

“All right,” Richard said. “Out of the tub. I want us all touching if we're doing this. And I want to lie down.”

“Uh-huh,” Matthew said. He was already headed for the lust-filled bewilderment that meant we'd have to help him to the bed.

I removed my foot from his crotch and stood. Richard slipped out from behind him, and Matthew whimpered at the loss.

“C'mon, kid.” I helped him to his feet.

He kissed me, devoured me with his hunger. He tasted salty and sweet at the same time. Richard helped us out of the water as Matthew and I kissed. Then Matthew licked along my neck and chest, sucking and nipping his way toward a nipple.

Richard kissed me and rested a hand in Matthew's hair. His kiss was as lethargic and unfocused as Matthew's, but just as delicious. I wrapped my arms around both men and massaged their tired muscles.

Richard tasted down my body. He took my other nipple in his mouth, twisted and flicked it with his lips and tongue, adding to the sensation Matthew gave me on the other side. Then he moved across my chest. Their breath and lips barely touched me as they kissed over and around my skin. The tease was agony.

“Love your touch,” I said. “Harder.”

As if taunting me, Richard picked up Matthew, took two steps, and shoved him against the wall. Matthew groaned and arched into the touch, wrapping his legs around Richard.

“Get over here, Luke,” Richard said. “You started this. Fuck me and the kid into the wall.”

His plea and the scene before me immobilized me. The two men slammed against each other, desperate to satiate their need despite the fatigue in their bodies. I grabbed the lube and slicked my fingers as I knelt behind Richard. He spread his thighs, and I reached my hand between his legs to Matthew's ass. I had Matthew grasping at Richard's shoulders, pushing down, riding my touch, begging for more in a hurry. I stood and slid my hand back to Richard. I enjoyed the feel of his balls for a moment then moved along to slick and stroke his crease.

I shoved my fingers into Richard at the moment he entered Matthew. The combined moans fed my blinding hunger. I withdrew. Nothing could have stopped me from taking him, plunging into his heat.

Whether from the physical tiredness of my body or the desire-laden cloud I traveled on, I needed to be inside him, needed to hear him scream with pleasure and hear Matthew's shrill cries as our bodies slapped together. I thrust hard and drove Richard against Matthew.

“Luke!” Richard yelled. “Yes. Fuck me harder.”

I wasn't sure I could do anything with more force or accuracy than I already used, but I sure as hell tried. A tiny part of my brain wondered if we were hurting Matthew with our less-than-gentle shoves. His groan confirmed the opposite. He shouted our names in succession as he came over Richard's hand.

Richard followed him with several loud grunts and quick snaps of his hips. Both men collapsed against the wall, and I gave a few more uncoordinated plunges into Richard.

My forehead landed on his back. “Fuck. That was... that was... ”

“Unbelievable,” Richard said.

Matthew giggled and spoke with a sluggish voice, his legs and arms still wrapped around Richard, his head resting on the wall behind him. “We should move every day.”

“No fucking way.” Richard groaned as I left him. He held on to Matthew until the man found the floor with his feet.

We made our way to the bedroom, and by the time Richard had the blankets up, Matthew snored between us.

We lay in silence for a few minutes before Richard spoke. “Luke?”

“Huh?”

“Will your dad come after you again? Will he try to hurt you?”

I rolled to face him. “I don't know. Eventually, he'll try to make you leave me. I just don't know how far he'll go.”