Mummy Told Me Not to Tell (30 page)

And as if to make the day complete, when I arrived home from watching the assembly I found Adrian, my son, unpacking his car, having just driven back from university for the summer recess.

‘Surprise!’ he yelled, seeing me draw up outside the house. I knew he was coming home at some point but I didn’t know when. We hugged each other and then I gave him a hand unloading the rest of his things from the car. He had passed his driving test in January and had told me on the phone he’d bought an old Renault, which he was just about managing to run on the income from his student jobs.

‘You did take it slowly on the motorway?’ I asked him. Now he had ‘wheels’ I worried myself sick that he would do what some lads do and show off.

‘Yes, don’t worry. It won’t go over a hundred,’ he laughed.

Although Adrian and I had spoken to each other on the phone every other week, I hadn’t seen him since Christmas, as he had gone away with his friends to Spain at Easter. It was strange having this big strapping lad in the house again. He was over six feet tall and broad-shouldered like his father, and seemed to fill any room he stood in.

When I collected Reece from school that afternoon and told him he would meet Adrian at last, he was beside himself with excitement. For the rest of the evening Adrian had a shadow who followed two feet behind him until Adrian said he was going out to ‘catch up with some local mates’.

Are you going to the pub?’ I asked as he came into the living room to say goodbye.

‘Probably, why?’

‘You won’t drink and drive, will you?’

‘Mum!’ he said with a sigh, and I knew I had to shut up.

The term finished for Lucy, Paula and then Reece. It was great having the family together and home for the summer, and of course the ‘icing on the cake’ was that I wouldn’t spend the weeks dreading Reece returning to school in September as I had done before the previous term.

I hadn’t booked a summer holiday because Reece’s contact arrangements were still in place, and the same constraints applied as they had done at Easter. I found it was impossible to book a short break at the height of the season, so I told the girls and Adrian (if he wanted to come) that as soon as Reece’s case had been to court for the final hearing, when the contact would certainly be reduced, I would book a holiday for us all abroad. Possibly in the October half-term week. If Reece were still with us, which I assumed he would be, the social worker (then with full parental responsibility) would be able to get a passport for Reece. I could have taken a holiday without Reece in the summer — he could have stayed with respite carers — but with all the changes he’d had I didn’t want to run the risk of unsettling him. The girls understood. We would have days out, and Adrian, Lucy and Paula would be working for some of the time anyway.

Jill visited, as she did every four to six weeks, and was obviously as pleased as I was by the successful end of
the summer term for Reece. Jill also wondered if the conversation I’d had with Reece had cemented his feelings of safety and caused the change in his behaviour, but we would never know for certain. Jill said that Jamey had finished his report for the court and had asked her to tell me that I could go into the office to read it. He felt I should read it, as it contained ‘significant new information’ which might help me in my care of Reece. I said I would, and when Jill left I phoned Jamey to make an appointment to go into the office.

‘It’s the first time anyone has brought the family’s history together,’ he said on the phone. ‘I compiled the report from five different files which I found in five different locations. They are all on the system now. It took me ages. I’ll warn you now: my report is not pleasant reading, but it does explain a lot.’

I thanked him, and then asked Lucy and Paula if they would mind looking after Reece for a couple of hours the day after tomorrow, which they were happy to do. And ‘not pleasant reading’ was to prove to be a gross understatement!

T
wo days later I sat in the swivel chair with the file containing the report balanced on Jamey’s desk and turned the pages, as Jamey, to my right, took the third phone call from Tracey that morning — and it was only 10.30. I didn’t look up as his steady relaxed tone patiently deflected her anger, which I could hear coming down the phone. ‘I understand, Tracey … Yes … I will … Yes … I was told … No … I understand.’ His mellow voice and laid-back manner had found its purpose — in soothing her. After ten minutes I heard him say goodbye, then a little sigh, followed by his fingers tapping on his keyboard as he once again worked on his computer.

I still didn’t look up as, transfixed, mesmerized and horrified by what I was reading, I continued to turn the pages of his report. Although it was primarily about Reece, Jamey had used the information he had gathered from all the files to place Reece in the context of the larger and wider family background, which the judge would require for the final hearing.

There were extracts from reports dating back to when Tracey had first come to the notice of the social services seventeen years before, when Sharon, her first child, had been one year old. It was noted at that time that there were concerns about Tracey’s ability to look after the child as a single parent, and she and the baby were being monitored by the social services. It was also noted that Tracey could be threatening and aggressive to the professionals who were trying to help her. There was no father present, and Tracey said that Sharon’s father had never seen the child and he didn’t even know he was a father. She told a social worker at this time that she had been beaten and sexually abused by her own father throughout her childhood and even into adulthood.

When asked where her father was, and if he was still seeing her and had access to the baby, Tracey had become aggressive and threatened the social worker. The social worker had subsequently made a note on the file stating that she had been told by a neighbour that Tracey’s father was still in the area. Tracey’s mother had been ill with cancer for most of Tracey’s teenage years and had died two years before Sharon had been born. Another social worker had noted in the file that because of Tracey’s alleged abuse by her father, and because he had been seen in the area, there were concerns that Tracey’s child, Sharon, could be at risk of abuse by the grandfather if he visited the family home. However, these appeared to remain only concerns. Tracey refused to give any more details, and then said she hadn’t seen her father in years.

At this time Tracey was claiming all the benefit allowances she was entitled to but was still going into the social services’ offices almost on a daily basis to demand more payments. She brought her baby daughter, Sharon, with her and said she had no money to feed her. It was noted that often the child had no socks or shoes and her clothes were dirty, although Tracey had been given extra grants for clothing. It was also noted that Tracey had learning difficulties and was functioning at a much younger level than that of her age.

The social services continued to monitor Tracey and Sharon, who was two years old when Brad was born. Again, there was no father present, but Tracey did say her own father had a new partner and that lady was helping her, though there was never any evidence of this when the social worker made a visit. By now Sharon was showing signs of being developmentally delayed and a paediatrician’s assessment at the time confirmed this. Brad was a difficult baby and Tracey spent all her time seeing to the baby; Sharon became badly neglected and was taken into care at the age of three. The baby, Brad, who seemed to be thriving, was left with Tracey, although they were being carefully monitored. Tracey then moved suddenly, without notifying the social services of where she was going, and disappeared from the records. When she reappeared again, in a neighbouring county, she was pregnant again. She demanded to be rehoused, as she was living in a bed and breakfast, and she claimed again that her father had physically assaulted her. It was noted on the records that she had a black eye and swelling to her neck and upper arm.

She was rehoused and monitored, although she often denied the social services access. One social worker who did gain access had written that she thought there was a man staying. Tracey was visiting the social services’ offices again and demanding more money. On each occasion she was given an emergency payment and Brad, now a toddler, was observed. A paediatric report at that time said that Brad too was suffering from delayed development. When Sean was born Brad was two and it soon became clear that Tracey wasn’t coping. Brad was taken into care for six months and then returned to Tracey, who had persuaded the judge she could provide a stable home.

During the next year Tracey, Sean and Brad were monitored by the social services as much as was possible. Tracey was often abusive and aggressive when a social worker visited and sometimes denied them access. Tracey claimed again that her father had assaulted her but didn’t want to press charges. She was still appearing regularly in the social services’ offices for additional payments. There was a period when Sharon was returned to Tracey’s care after Tracey had taken the social services to court, and for eighteen months Tracey had the three children with her, but the situation deteriorated and all three children were taken into care.

During this period Tracey presented at the social services and said she had been raped by a taxi driver and was pregnant. On examination she was found to be six months pregnant, but when interviewed by the police she withdrew the rape allegation, although she claimed
to know who the perpetrator was. Tracey had been given money for the taxi fare so that she could attend contact to see the children, and although the social services and police made enquires about the taxi firm there was no evidence and no suspicion fell on anyone.

It was noted at this time that Sean too was showing signs of developmental delay. Tracey said she didn’t want to keep the baby she was expecting because it had ‘bad blood’, and when baby Lisa was born she was placed with foster carers at three days old. The baby thrived and Tracey’s sister — who had normal intelligence, was married and had limited contact with Tracey — offered to look after the baby permanently, as she had done since. Tracey never visited Lisa, still saying she had ‘bad blood’ and ‘the devil in her’. It was noted that Lisa was thriving and developing normally, and appeared to have normal intelligence.

For no obvious reason Tracey attempted suicide at that time by swallowing pills but immediately rang for an ambulance. It was noted that Sharon, Brad and Sean were still developmentally delayed. Tracey had applied to have the children back again, but the court granted a full care order and the three children were placed in long-term foster homes. Tracey left the flat she had been living in and disappeared from view again. When she reappeared in this county she was pregnant again. She was housed in a flat and subsequently gave birth to Susie, whom she was allowed to take home because the father of the baby was also parenting the child. This new family was carefully monitored.

The records showed that at this time Tracey’s own father was also spending time at the flat, sometimes living there. Tracey denied she had ever made allegations about her father and accused the social services of lying so that they could take her children into care. Baby Susie also showed signs of developmental delay and a report concluded that it was most likely a genetic predisposition being passed on through Tracey’s side of the family, as all the children — Sharon, Brad, Sean and now Susie — had learning difficulties but different fathers. The unusual front teeth Tracey shared with these children were also mentioned as a sign of a dominant gene being responsible. Susie’s father remained at the family home, although he spent a lot of time away.

Tracey had another baby, a girl, who suffered a cot death at 11 weeks, then Reece was born two years later. At the same time Susie’s father moved out, claiming he was not the father of Reece. About that time the police were called to the family home on a number of occasions and Tracey accused Susie’s father of assault, although she never pressed charges. The police noted that there were two other men in the house who Tracey said were her father and the father of Reece. After Susie’s father had moved out he was never heard of again and lost contact with Susie. A paediatrician confirmed that Susie was developmentally delayed, as were Sharon, Brad, and Sean. She also noted that Susie’s front teeth might need orthodontic work when she was older.

When Reece was one year old and Susie was three, Reece’s father, Scott, moved into the family home.
Although Scott had a criminal record for assault it was felt that the family was benefiting from his presence and that he had a positive relationship with both his son, Reece, and his stepdaughter Susie. Reece was also noted to be showing signs of developmental delay. Scott was absent from the family home on two separate occasions, having been convicted for assault, but Tracey visited him in prison and during that time the family was once again monitored.

When Scott returned to the family home after serving his last prison sentence ‘a high level of disturbance’ was reported in the home and the police were called on a number of occasions. Tracey was again making regular appearances at the social services’ offices, demanding more payments, issuing threats and being verbally and physically aggressive. Concerns were again expressed about her mental health but she refused to see a psychiatrist for assessment. During this period it was noted that Scott had ‘friends’ from his time in prison who stayed at the house and one of them was a known paedophile. The family situation deteriorated very quickly and it was noted that Susie and Reece appeared uncared for and started presenting with injuries at casualty. When Susie told her teacher that her ‘daddy was doing rude things to her’, she and Reece were taken into care.

This had brought me up to the present, and I paused and sat back. Although there were still some pages to go, I felt drained. An hour had passed and when I glanced at Jamey I saw he was taking yet another call from Tracey. I could hear her voice swearing and
cursing at him down the phone and then Jamey’s tranquil tone in direct contrast, calming her. I flexed my shoulders and returned to the file to read the conclusion. It was not the summing-up I had expected.