Naomi’s Christmas (33 page)

“He’ll get over it.” Lovina’s tone didn’t promise much sympathy for Nathan. “As soon
as you were gone, your daad started in again on how he’d said all along that you should
have come to us, and if everyone only did what he said, we’d all be happier.”

“I’m sorry.” She’d involved them in her troubles, it seemed.

“Don’t be,” Lovina said. “I did what I should have done before. I came right out and
said I wouldn’t be happier, because I didn’t want to work in the store, I wanted to
stay at home and take care of my own children. And Elijah tried to shush me, but I
said he was just as bad, and he knew how I felt so why didn’t he have courage enough
to tell his daad.”

“Lovina, you didn’t.” Naomi, caught between laughter and tears, could only stare at
her sister-in-law.

“I did. And that shut the both of them up, I can tell you. And then Nathan—”

“He’s not going to try and talk to me, is he?” Panic ripped through her. “I can’t
see him now.”

“I can’t promise he won’t want to see you sometime soon, but it won’t be tonight.
Betty up and told him to his face that
it was no wonder you’d turned him down, the ham-handed way he went about asking you
to marry him. And when Daad tried to lay blame on Nathan, she turned on him and told
him that he was at fault just as much or more.”

Naomi’s head threatened to split open. “I can’t imagine— What on earth did the bishop
think of all those goings-on?”

Lovina shrugged. “He just smiled. He told me to make them leave you alone for a bit.
After he left, I got rid of Nathan and convinced Elijah to mind his own business.
But Daad is outside waiting, and I think he won’t go home without seeing you, at least
for a minute.”

Naomi might have known her father would have to have the last word. She nodded, the
movement a bit shaky. “Ja, all right.”

Lovina stood, and then she bent to hug her. “You were right about the coming boppli,”
she whispered. “And we stand behind you, whatever you decide to do.”

She had gone to the door before Naomi could find the words to thank her.

There was a murmur of voices, and then Daad and Betty came into the kitchen. Naomi
rose, not wanting to face Daad sitting down if he was going to scold her.

But her father didn’t look as if he were in a scolding mood. In fact, he seemed a
bit ashamed, or maybe embarrassed. Betty had to nudge him to get him started.

“Naomi, I…I hope you are all right.” He glanced at Betty, and then looked at his shoes.
“I should not have spoken…carried on the way I did.”

No one could not say it didn’t matter, because it did. It had precipitated that foolish
offer of marriage from Nathan, and that was no small matter.

“Denke, Daadi,” she said finally. “I appreciate it.” Even if Betty was making him
apologize, she was grateful. She was sure now that she had underestimated Betty.

Daad met her gaze then. He took a step toward her, and his face worked as if emotions
threatened to overcome him. “I am sorry,” he said again, his voice husky. “I should
not have let a wall grow between us. You are a gut daughter, Naomi.”

A sob broke loose from her control, and she went quickly into his arms, feeling them
close around her, inhaling the familiar scent of him. “Denke, Daadi,” she whispered.
“I love you.”

He hugged her as if she were a small child again, and then he let her go. “Gut, gut.
And if you want to komm home, you are wilkom.”

She didn’t, but she appreciated the offer more than she could say. “I must think about
what I am going to do.”

Daad opened his mouth as if he planned to tell her. Then he closed it again. He nodded.

“You will tell us when you decide,” he said. “We are your family. We will stand with
you, whatever the decision is.”

He edged toward the door, and Naomi suspected he would be glad to leave the emotional
displays behind. She hugged Betty, whispering her thanks in Betty’s ear. Betty nodded,
and in a moment they were gone.

Naomi was alone. Now she could think about what she meant to do. The only trouble
was that she didn’t have any idea.

The
house had been so empty when Nathan awoke that it set up lonely echoes in his heart.
He’d been eager to leave it behind
to come out to the barn for the morning milking. He leaned against the warm side of
a cow and aimed a squirt of milk at the barn cat, who lapped it from her whiskers
and then set about busily washing her face.

He couldn’t distract himself from his troubles so easily. The children were safe with
his sister, for the moment. But what about when they came home? And what about Naomi?

He’d made a mess of that situation, and it was his own fault. If he hadn’t let Sam
Esch make him angry, if he’d simply let the bishop handle Sam, everything would be
back to normal by now.

Well, maybe not normal. Folks would still be talking, but when Bishop Mose’s attitude
became known, the talk would die off.

The clop of hooves announced Daad’s arrival. At least the effort of talking to Daad
might take his mind off his troubles.

“You are here early,” he said.

Daad slid the barn door closed behind him, cutting out the cold. “Ja.” He rubbed his
hands together to warm them as he approached the next cow in the row. “Thought maybe
you’d want to talk before Isaiah got here.”

So it looked as if there was no avoiding the subject. At least, as Daad settled on
the milking stool, Nathan couldn’t see his face.

“The kinder are all right?” he asked, delaying the moment when they’d have to talk
about what had happened yesterday.

“Ja, they are fine. Sarah kept them all so busy they were ready to fall into bed when
the time came.” The rhythmic sound of the milk hitting the pail punctuated his words.
“But soon they will ask questions. What will you tell them?”

“I don’t know.” The cow flicked her tail, maybe picking up on his edginess. “I made
a mess of things, didn’t I?”

Daad grunted. “You were ferhoodled for sure, asking Naomi to marry you in that way.”

“I know, I know. I let Sam make me mad, and now I’ve hurt Naomi. If I’d just kept
quiet, well, it might have been awkward for a while, but she’d be back here where
she belongs.”

“I doubt she thinks she belongs here now,” Daad said, not letting him off easy.

“I was stupid. I know.”

“The women lost no time in letting you know what they thought of you, that’s certain-sure.”
There might have been a smile in Daad’s voice over the way Lovina and Betty had reacted.

“At least they blamed Sam, as well,” Nathan said.

“That is not a defense for what you did.”

“I know,” he agreed hurriedly. Daad might be soft-spoken, but he never made light
of it when one of his children did something wrong and tried to get out of the blame.
“Naomi has been nothing but kind and generous to the kinder and to me. And in return
I insulted her with that stupid proposal.”

Daad didn’t speak for a moment. Nathan heard the scrape of his milking stool, and
then Daad appeared, standing there looking at him with a question in his face.

“The way you did it was stupid, that’s certain-sure. But is it such a far-fetched
idea, marrying Naomi?”

Nathan opened his mouth and then shut it again. He would not admit that when he’d
thought about being married to Naomi, it had seemed…what? Comforting? Right?

“I don’t think—”

The evasion he was fumbling for didn’t have to be spoken, since the barn door slid
open and Isaiah came in. Daad could hardly think Nathan would talk about Naomi in
front of her brother.

Isaiah unwrapped the muffler that covered his mouth. “I will take over for you, Nathan.
You are needed back at the house.”

“Naomi?” He stood up so quickly he knocked the milking stool over.

Isaiah shook his head, frowning a little. “No. I have not seen her this morning. It
is Jessie Miller, here already and wanting to know where the kinder are.”

Jessie. Nathan exchanged glances with Daad. What on earth was Jessie doing here this
time in the morning? He shrugged. Whatever the answer, he would have to deal with
it.

“Denke, Isaiah. I will go.”

When he stepped outside, the cold air smacked his face, and his feet crunched on the
patches of icy snow. He heard steps behind him and turned to see Daad coming, too.

He waited until Daad caught up with him and looked a question at him, smiling a little.
“Do you think I cannot handle Jessie on my own?”

Daad did not have a returning smile. “Maybe so, maybe not. But with Jessie—I think
it best that you not be alone with her.”

Nathan could only stare at his father. “Why? What do you think might happen?”

Daad shrugged, his face setting in determined lines. “Jessie is unpredictable. I think
maybe Naomi has been right in thinking Jessie needs help.”

Nathan turned this unexpected comment over in his mind. How many times had he made
the excuses Ada had always made, ones Emma continued to make? Jessie was immature.
Jessie was emotional. She just needed to grow up a bit. The familiar phrases sounded
hollow.

He glanced at Daad as they reached the steps. “Are you thinking that it was Jessie
who started the rumors about me and Naomi? But she couldn’t have known.”

Daad didn’t answer. He just walked up to the door and paused, letting Nathan go inside
first.

The instant Nathan stepped into the kitchen, Jessie spun toward him.

“Nathan!” She reached out as if to hug him. Daad moved from behind him, and she froze.
“Ezra.” She nodded toward him.

“Jessie, what are you doing here?” Nathan said. “You should not be out this early.
It must not have been light yet when you left home.” He moved toward the stove, busying
himself with pouring a mug of coffee for Daad.

“Why shouldn’t I be here?” She elbowed him aside. “I will do the coffee. You don’t
need to bother.” She swung around with the mug so quickly that some of the coffee
sloshed out. She didn’t seem to notice, handing it to Daad.

Daad nodded his thanks. Setting the mug on the table, he began taking his jacket off,
moving deliberately as if announcing that he was here to stay.

Nathan tried to gather his thoughts. “I’m sure your mamm would be unhappy if she knew
you had driven out here so early. Are you going to see her today?”

Jessie shook her head, kapp strings fluttering with the
movement. “I can’t go to see her. I’ll be too busy here.” She turned, hurrying over
to the stove and picking up the coffeepot again. “I should make more coffee. Men need
something hot when they’re working outside on such a cold day.”

Nathan seized the pot from her and set it down. “That is ser kind of you, but I don’t
want coffee. What do you mean, you’ll be busy here?”

“Watching the kinder, of course.” She grabbed a dishcloth and began rubbing it over
the counter as if she’d wear right through the surface. “Cooking and cleaning and
taking care of you and the kinder. That’s what Ada would have wanted. Where are Joshua
and Sadie? I want to see them.” She dropped the cloth as quickly as she’d picked it
up.

Nathan felt as if his wits had slowed to molasses. What was she going on about? “The
kinder are with my sister, Sarah. They’re fine. You’ll have to see them some other
time.”

“But I want them to be here. This is where they belong.” She spun again, her quick
movements making him dizzy, and he longed for Naomi’s calm, serene presence. “I’ll
go and bring them home.”

“No.” He caught her wrists to keep her from bolting out the door and then let her
go just as quickly when she leaned toward him. “I want my children to be just where
they are, do you understand, Jessie? Now calm down and tell me what you are talking
about.”

She looked at him as if he were being dense. Maybe he was. Naomi had tried to warn
him, and he hadn’t listened.

“Naomi isn’t going to be around here anymore. She won’t be trying to take Ada’s place.
But you can count on me. I will take gut care of you and the children.”

Nathan’s stomach twisted. “No, Jessie. You will not be caring for the kinder. Do you
understand what I am saying?”

She stared at him, anger flashing in her eyes. “Naomi has turned you against me. I
should have known she would.”

The last thing he wanted was to have Jessie direct her anger against Naomi. “This
has nothing to do with Naomi. I make the decisions for my kinder.”

“It’s all right.” The anger changed in an instant to a smile. “I understand. You think
I’m not responsible enough, but I am. You’ll see.”

In an instant she was out the door, pulling her coat on as she went, her bonnet dangling
from one hand. Before Nathan could decide if he should try to stop her, she was gone.

Daad put a hand on his shoulder. “Best to let her go. It would cause more trouble
if you tried to stop her, ain’t so?”

“Maybe, but one thing is sure.” Responsibility weighed heavily on him. “You were right
to be cautious. Something must be done about Jessie.”

The sound of someone knocking sent Naomi cautiously to the back door, thinking of
all the people she did not want to see today. But the visitor was Lovina, and she
gestured with the suitcase she’d agreed to lend Naomi when they’d talked briefly after
Daad and Betty had left the previous day.

“Lovina, komm. I’m glad it’s you.” She could only hope her face wasn’t showing the
stain of the tears she’d shed during the night.

“I brought the suitcase,” Lovina said unnecessarily, setting it down. “But are you
certain-sure you want to go away, Naomi?”

She wasn’t sure of anything, which seemed in itself a good reason for getting away
for a bit. “I’m sure. It will be gut to spend a few days with Anna and her family.”
And Anna’s house was a safe bus ride away from Pleasant Valley and all the gossip.

“Anna will be wonderful glad to see you, I know.” Lovina took her bonnet off, showing
she intended to stay.

Well, Naomi could hardly send her sister-in-law out into the cold again without something
to eat and a hot drink. She reached for the kettle.