Nearly Broken (7 page)

My heart chose that
moment to pound in my chest. Maybe it had been doing it all along,
but now in the calmness, it was making itself known. And the way we
were so tightly pressed together, I thought I could feel the
vibrating
pound-pound-pound
of his own heart reaching out to
mine. My head tilted down as my hands pulled away from his, my
fingertips lightly grazing his arms as they followed them around my
body and up to his shoulders. As my hands flattened on his chest,
they drifted down, tracing the curved muscles of his pecks and the
six-pack abs I saw when he slept shirtless. When his hands flattened
against my lower back and pressed my hips firmly into him, my eyes
headed north once more.

The moment our eyes
reconnected, it was like a spark ignited, setting off an explosion of
fireworks beneath my belly. My breath caught in my throat the second
his head began to move towards mine.

Tires squealed in
front of the diner, causing my head to automatically whip. I saw a
beat-up old white pick-up truck tearing its way up the road.

Joe was no longer in
the corner booth.

As if that wasn’t
enough to spoil the moment, a couple approached the door, also
watching Joe tear out like a bat out of hell. As they entered the
diner, they got a front row viewing through the pass-through of our
bodies pressed together. Our hands fell away about the same time and
I took a step back. The couple chose the booth in the middle of the
restaurant, continuing to smile and gaze our way more than they
should have.

Guess that’ll
add fuel to the rumors.

Nick surprised me when
he said, “I’ll get them. I met them earlier today and
suggested they stop in. Why don’t you eat something or get
started on the cleaning?”

“Okay,” I
replied softly. “Thanks.” I don’t know if he was
looking at me, but I lost all nerve to look at him once I pulled away
from what I was sure was going to be our first kiss. As he passed by,
his fingers trailed lightly against my lower back until they fell out
of reach.

As he took care of the
middle-aged couple, I dipped out of view, just realizing the burn on
my right arm had lost its shield. I quickly tugged on my sleeve and
patted my scoop neck tee to make sure it hadn’t been pulled
down, too.
What the hell was I thinking?
I was so close to
kissing him. Every pore in my body, every freakin’ cell was
pushing for me to go
just a little further, just a little further…
I rubbed my eyebrows extensively. I could
not
get involved
with him. It was bad enough I’d drawn the attention of the
entire town, more and more of them falling prey to gossip. They were
noticing me now. Nick was making people notice me.

And that just couldn’t
happen.
Head down. Stay off the radar.
My motto was going to
shit right before my eyes.

It wasn’t easy,
but I managed to get through the night without letting Nick get close
again. I had to brave eye contact, and force a smile when his gaze
caught mine, but I was always quick to divert. Luckily, that
middle-aged couple stayed a really long time, and I kept refilling
their coffee for a solid hour after their dinner. They were extremely
talkative, so it didn’t surprise me that they had engaged Nick
in conversation so easily that morning at the coffee shop. I’d
never had customers before that basically wanted you to just sit down
with them and kick back, asking nonstop questions about the things
you liked, books, music, Myrtle Creek. They shared way more than I
did, but I hung around because it kept my chicken ass from having to
go to the back and face Nick again. My efforts paid off, keeping us
from being able to pick up where we left off. And the more time
passed since our embrace, the more he realized I was pulling back on
the reins.

He didn’t ask
why or try to sweep me into his arms again. Instead, he smiled and
lightly teased me verbally about nonsense things, going along with my
silent request of pretending like nothing happened. And when we
turned in for bed, we simply said goodnight as I closed the dividers
between us.

I didn’t have
the nightmare that night. For once I got some rest, but a small part
of me, the weak part, wished I had, just so he could’ve come
rushing in to hold me.

No, no…just
no.
I kept repeating the mantra in my head:
I will not kiss
Nick. I will not kiss Nick.

Though I really wanted
to. Really,
really
wanted to know the feel of his lips and
have his hands press against my back again, eliminating all space
between us. My mind then upgraded that simple kiss to a few
make-believe scenarios that were so graphic my body was in constant
movement, slowly squirming in a wavelike motion. When a longing moan
escaped with my breath, my eyes bolted wide.

“Shit!” I
threw the covers off and rolled out of bed. Hightailing it to the
shower, I offered a quick good morning to Nick on the sofa, noting
the wicked smile he gave in return.
Oh, God.
Please tell me
that moan wasn’t loud enough for him to hear!

The hot water worked
wonders on my tight muscles, and by the time I dressed and came back
out, I was so relaxed I no longer opposed the flirtatious smiles Nick
continued to throw my way. But when he turned his back, my eyes began
to narrow. This was the first morning since becoming roommates that
he decided not to bother with a shirt, strutting around in nothing
but a pair of loose-fitted cotton pants, luring my gaze to the sexy
sculpture of his upper body.

I cursed the
butterflies flittering inside, and my damn eyes, which couldn’t
seem to stop looking.

God, I hated him.
Well, not really, but I hated how efficient he was in making me want
him. Ever since he activated those butterflies last night, I just
couldn’t shut the damn things off. They were still flitting
around, making me antsy and driving me crazy for not kissing him. And
despite my best efforts to convince myself to not get involved, I
felt my resolve dissipating. I wanted to rewind time so badly, and
this time ignore the distractions and stay put in his arms for that
kiss.

I entered the kitchen,
where he was already leaning over the counter drinking his coffee and
reading the paper. Seriously, what time did he wake up every morning
to get all that before I even woke up? I hung my head backwards, just
realizing he
absolutely
was half naked for my benefit, because
he would’ve had to put on a shirt to go out. Sucking my lower
lip in and out of my mouth, I focused in on the black tribal sleeve
tattoo that began halfway up his upper left arm and curled over the
edge of his shoulder. I couldn’t see it at the moment, but I
knew it covered part of his chest too. “Is that your only
tattoo?” I asked. I knew it wasn’t. I had already seen
something resembling jagged edges peeking out over the edge of his
pants. I’d only asked because a sense of playfulness was
overtaking me. And my eyes desired a special treat.

“No. I also have
a sunburst, but I doubt you’d want to see it.”

Taking the bait, I
inquired, “Oh, yeah? Why’s that?”

He twisted his torso
towards me and took the longest sip of coffee ever. Fighting the
extension of his already curving lips, he replied smoothly, “Because
it’s some place you’re too shy to look.”

I crossed my arms and
matched his magnetic smile with my own. “Funny how you’re
more worried about my viewing it than you having to show it –
if
it’s in a private area.”

His forehead creased
when his brow bones lifted. “Is that your way of asking to look
down my pants?”

“Is that where
it is?”

“You know that’s
where it is,” he accused coolly. “I saw you looking there
already.”

I had to look away,
because my smile was embarrassingly wide, and surely my cheeks were
flushing as brightly as a stop sign. “Guilty,” I
admitted, “But I was curious if there were any more than that.”

“Just the two.”
Finishing his coffee, he placed his cup down. He leaned back against
the counter, elbows high so his hands could clamp the edge. “And
you? Any tattoos you’d like to share?”

Huffing dramatically,
I snarked, “Do I look like the kind of girl that would do
that?”

“Honestly?”
I cocked my eyes, challenging him to finish. “You look like the
kind of girl that wants at least one tattoo, but is too shy to show
it, so you put it somewhere under those lacey undergarments of
yours.”

Well, shit. All except
the lace part. Nowadays I didn’t feel that sexy in my skin, so
I didn’t bother with the lace.

“Am I right?”
he interrogated, those vibrant green eyes trying to drill mine for
answers.

“Maybe.”

Lightly laughing, he
teased, “Let me guess. It’s something simple and cute.
Cartoon character? Favorite flower?”

Oops. I sucked in my
cheek so hard, it was obvious I was trying to deter my smile.

“Flower! I knew
it.”

“Blue
Hydrangeas,” I admitted. It was crazy how accurate he was. Was
I really that much of a statistic?

“And it’s
somewhere beneath those panties of yours, isn’t it? Maybe right
around the hip bone?”

Damn. Dead right
again. “Is that bad?”

“No, not at
all,” he practically cooed. “It’s actually an
incredibly sexy place to put one. Most men can’t get enough of
the hips.”

Our conversation
stalled, and the only voices came from whatever show he had on the
TV. He continued to stare me down with flirtatious looks, knowing
he’d break me down eventually.

“You’re
not waiting for me to show you, are you?” I asked impishly.

“Why? Do you
want to show me?”

My lips pressing
together, I shook my head at his new tactic. “Don’t twist
my words around like that.”

“So you
don’t
want to show me your panties then?”

“Again with the
twisting,” I accused.

“Alright,
alright. Don’t get your panties all in a twist.”

“Ha, ha. Lovely,
Nick. Shouldn’t you be taking your ritual shower right about
now, or something?”

“So now you just
want to get me naked. And exactly how much attention have you been
paying to me to know what my daily rituals are?”

My hands fisted at my
sides. Apparently, I wasn’t going to win the battle of the wits
this morning. Maybe there was something to coffee after all. My hand
motioned in front of my lips, signaling that I was locking my mouth
and throwing away the key. I was
so
not going to let him bait
me all morning.

I waved
bye now
with my hand and retreated to my bedroom. Before I could close the
partition, he asked, “Just out of curiosity, how long do you
think you can hold out until you give in? I’d just like a time
frame.”

“Give in to
what?” I dared to ask.

My heart fired up like
a souped-up race car watching him make his way over, pausing just
inches away, hands grasping the edges of the doors I was just shy of
closing. God, it was a sexy sight to behold.

“You wanted it
as much as I did,” he declared boldly. “Still do.”

The kiss
. I’d
never admit to it, but I had ached for it every second since our
bodies separated, even though my mind constantly tried to convince me
otherwise. I just wished the two would agree already, but my mind
would never allow me to forget that I’d never be safe.
Never
.
I could be gone at a moment’s notice. But still, it was only
human to want him for my very own.

“I should warn
you,” I taunted. “I’m quite stubborn, so I can hold
out like no other.”

His chest quietly
vibrated with rumbles, the amusement on his face silently telling me
he was accepting the challenge to break me down. I gave into my
desires partially, and allowed my hand to trace the black ink on his
shoulder. When he was completely enthralled by my touch, watching my
finger swirl against his skin, I quickly and very playfully, shoved
against both shoulders to remove him from my door frame. He took the
hint and fell back, giving me the most delicious of grins as I closed
him off.

Oh, shit I’m
in trouble.