Needing Her (23 page)

After the first three years of the abuse, I stopped sneaking out to Ty’s house every night, only doing so on the nights when it was something other than body parts hitting me, but Tyler was always waiting, no matter what. He kept a first aid kit in his room, and would clean up and bandage anything he was able to. We butterfly-bandaged almost all the cuts, but three times he forced me to get stitches. We told his dad I tripped over something while going for a run outside each time. I’m not naïve, I knew his dad didn’t believe me—especially since I was not one for running, and the only time I was involved with sports was watching it on Ty’s TV—but we were always careful to hide my bruises around him and he never tried to figure out where I actually got the cuts from. I’d sit at their kitchen table and let him sew me up, they’d let me out the front door when they were sure I was okay, and Tyler would be waiting by his open window as soon as I rounded the house. Every night he had something ready for me to sleep in, and every night he would hold my hand and curl his body around mine until we fell asleep.

So when Tyler kissed my forehead, cheek, or hand, it never meant anything romantic. He was just comforting me in the same way he had since we were kids.

“Cassi? Did I lose you?” Tyler waved his hand in front of my face.

“Sorry. Life, starting over. Friends, yeah, this, uh—will be—I need to . . . friends.” I’m pretty sure there was English somewhere in that sentence.

Ty barked out a laugh and squeezed my knee, and after a few silent minutes he thankfully changed the subject. “So what do you think about the apartment?”

“It’s great. Are you sure you want me to stay with you? I can get my own place, or even sleep on the couch . . .” My own place? That was such a far-fetched idea it was almost funny; I didn’t even have a hundred dollars to my name.

“No way, I’ve shared my bed with you for eleven years, I’m not about to change that now.”

“Ty, but what about when you get a girlfriend? Are you really going to want to explain why I live with you? Why we share a dresser, closet, and bed?”

Tyler looked at me for a second before turning his eyes back to the road. His brown eyes had darkened, and his lips were mashed in a tight line. “You’re staying with me, Cassi.”

I sighed but didn’t say anything else. We’d had a version of this argument plenty of times. Every relationship he’d ever had ultimately ended because of me and the fact that we were always together. I hated that I ruined his relationships, and whenever he was dating someone I would even stop coming to his room and answering his calls so he could focus on his girlfriend instead. That never lasted long though; he’d climb through my window, pick me up out of bed, and take me back to his house. We never had to worry about my boyfriends, since I’d never had one. What with Tyler’s possessiveness and all, no one even attempted to get close enough to me. Not that it bothered me; the only guy I’d ever had feelings for was too old for me and had only been in my life for a few short minutes. The moment I’d answered the door to see him standing there, my stomach had started fluttering and I felt this weird connection with him I’d never felt with anyone, and even after he was gone I’d dreamed about his cool intensity and mesmerizing blue eyes. Ty didn’t know about him though, because what was the point? I’d just barely turned sixteen and he was a cop; I knew I’d never see him again, and I didn’t. Besides, other than my real dad and Ty, I had a problem with letting guys get close, strange connection or not. When my already-disturbed world turned completely upside down the minute a new man came into our house . . . trust issues were bound to happen.

Tyler had decided to go to the University of Texas in Austin, where his cousin Gage, who was two years older than us, was currently studying. I’d heard a lot about Gage and his family from Ty over the years, since they were his only cousins, and I was genuinely happy he was going. Gage was like a brother to him and Tyler hadn’t seen him in a few years, so their sharing an apartment would be good for Ty. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do when Tyler left; the only thing I did know was that I was getting away from the house I grew up in. I just had to make it another month until I turned eighteen and then I was gone. But Tyler, being Tyler, made my future plans for me. He crawled through my window, told me to pack my bag, and just before he could haul me off to his Jeep, he told Mom and Jeff exactly what he thought of them. I didn’t have time to worry about the consequences of his telling them off, because before I knew it we were on the freeway and headed for Texas. We made the trip in just over a day, and now, after being here long enough to unpack his Jeep and shower separately, we were headed to some lake for a party to meet up with Gage and his friends.

Gage’s family wasn’t from Austin; I didn’t know where in Texas they lived, but apparently they had a ranch. After hearing that, I’d had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from asking what Gage was like. I understood we were in Texas now, but already Austin had blown my expectations of dirt roads and tumbleweeds away with its downtown buildings and greenery everywhere. I just didn’t know how I’d handle living with a tight-Wranglered, big-belt-buckled, Stetson-wearing cowboy like I’d seen in rodeos and movies. I’d probably burst out laughing every time I saw him.

When we came up to the lake and the group of people, I sucked in a deep breath in a futile attempt to calm my nerves. I wasn’t a fan of new people.

Tyler grabbed my hand and gave it a tight squeeze. “New beginning, Cassi. And I’ll be right here next to you.”

“I know. I can do this.” His Jeep stopped and I immediately took that back.
Nope. No, I can’t do this.
I had to think quickly of where every bruise was, making sure my clothes were covering them all, even though I’d already gone through this at the apartment. I just didn’t want anyone here to know what kind of life I’d had.

I jumped out of Tyler’s Jeep, took one more deep breath, and mentally pumped myself up.
New life. I can do this.
I turned and rounded the front and hadn’t even made it to Tyler’s side when I saw him. I don’t know if I made a conscious choice to stop walking or if I was still making my way to Tyler and didn’t realize it; all I could focus on or see was the guy standing about ten feet from me. He was tall, taller than Tyler’s six-foot frame, and had on loose, dark tan cargo shorts and a white button-up shirt, completely unbuttoned, revealing a tan, toned chest and abs. His arms were covered in muscles, but he didn’t look like someone who spent hours in the gym or taking steroids. The only way I can describe them is natural, and labor-made. His jet-black hair had that messy, just-got-out-of-bed look, and my hand twitched just thinking about running my fingers through it. I couldn’t see what color eyes he had from here, but they were locked on me, his mouth slightly open. He had a bottle of water in his hand, and it was raised like he had been about to take a drink out of it before he saw me. I had no idea what was happening to me, but my entire body started tingling, and my palms were sweating just looking at him.

I’d seen plenty of attractive guys—Tyler looked like an Abercrombie and Fitch model, for crying out loud. But Mr. New couldn’t even be described as something as degrading as
attractive
. He looked like a god. My breath was becoming rougher, and my blood started warming as I took an unconscious step toward him. Just then a tall, leggy blonde bounced over to his side and wrapped her arms around his waist, kissing his strong jaw. It felt like someone punched me in the stomach and I was instantly jealous of whoever this girl was. Shaking my head, I forced my eyes to look away.
What the hell, Cassidy? Calm down.

“Cassi, you coming?”

I blinked and looked over at Tyler, who had his hand outstretched to me. “Uh, yeah.” I glanced back at Mr. New and saw he still hadn’t moved. The perky blonde was chatting his ear off, and he didn’t even seem to be hearing her. I felt a blush creep up my cheeks from the way he was looking at me, like he’d just seen the sun for the first time, and continued over to Tyler.

Tyler pulled me to his side and whispered in my ear, “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I reassured him, trying to slow my heart down for a completely different reason now.

He kissed my cheek and pulled away. “Okay, well let me introduce you to Gage.”

Right. Gage. Tyler dropped my hand, only to put his on the small of my back as he led me over to Mr. New and the leggy blonde.
Oh no. No no no no no.

“ ’Sup, man?” Tyler slapped him on the back and Mr. New slowly dragged his eyes from me to the guy who’d just hit him.

Gage’s eyes went wide when he saw Ty. “Tyler, hey! I didn’t realize y’all were here yet.”

Oh. Good. God. That voice. Even with that small sentence I could hear the drawl in it. It was deep and gravelly, and easily the sexiest thing I’d ever heard.

“Yeah, we just got here. Cassi, this is my cousin Gage. Gage, this is Cassi.”

Gage brought his hand out. “It’s a pleasure, Cassi. I’m glad y’all are finally here.”

My knees went weak and a jolt of electricity went through me when I shook his hand. From how he glanced down at our hands quickly, he’d felt it too. “It’s nice to meet you too.” Now that I was up close, I could see his bright green eyes, hidden behind thick black lashes and eyebrows. He was the definition of masculine. From his strong jaw and brow, high cheekbones, defined nose, and perfectly kissable lips, his looks screamed
man
. The only thing offsetting the masculinity were his boyish deep dimples, which had me hooked. Yep,
god
was the only word out there that fit him.

Our hands didn’t separate fast enough for the tall blonde, so she thrust her hand forward. “I’m Brynn, Gage’s girlfriend.” Her eyes narrowed on the last word.

I shouldn’t have, but I glanced at Gage again. His brows were pulled down in either confusion or annoyance when he looked at Brynn.
You have got to be kidding me,
I thought. I didn’t care if it had been only two seconds since I first saw him, this couldn’t be a normal reaction for two people just meeting to have with each other, and he had a freaking girlfriend. It hadn’t even felt like this with the cop who came to my door that night, and I’d thought about him for almost two years!

I squared my shoulders and dropped Gage’s hand, focusing on Brynn. “It’s great to meet you, Brynn!” I hoped my smile looked genuine. I didn’t need an enemy yet, especially if she was dating the guy I was going to be living with. But hell, I’m not gonna lie—I was already thinking of ways to get her out of the picture.

Tyler and Brynn shook hands, and she looked back at me, noticing that I was doing everything to keep from looking at her boyfriend. Tyler and Gage were catching up, and every time Gage would speak I had to force myself not to shut my eyes and lose myself in the way his voice caused chills to go through my whole body.

“So, Cassi, what do you say we go introduce you to the rest of the girls?” Brynn finally said sweetly.

Tyler looked elated; this was exactly what he wanted. “Sounds great,” I said, and stepped away from the guys. It felt wrong to walk away, but I could feel Gage watching me as I did.

“You and Tyler, huh?” Brynn nudged my shoulder.

“What do you mean?”

“Y’all make such a cute couple.” She wasn’t complimenting, she was reaching.

“Thanks, but no. Tyler and I are best friends, nothing more.”

“You sure about that? I saw the way he was looking at you, and he had his arm around you.”

“We’re just different like that. We’ve been best friends our entire lives.”

“Right. Are you going to UT too?” she asked, sounding a little too curious.

“Uh, no. I’m not planning on going to school at all.”

“So why are you here?” If it hadn’t been for the curled-up lip, she would have just simply sounded interested.

“Honestly? I have no idea. Tyler packed my bag and threw me in his Jeep. Apparently Gage didn’t care if I lived with them.” I smirked and turned to begin the introductions with the girls who were now right next to us.

Gage

W
HAT THE HELL
was
that? Nothing like that had ever happened to me. One look at Cassi and it felt like my world stopped. All I could think about was closing the distance between us. I don’t know how to describe it, but I needed to go to her. Unfortunately, I was frozen in place, taking in the most beautiful girl I’d ever seen. Her long brown hair was windblown, and those wide honey-colored eyes made me want to get lost in them. She looked so sweet and fragile, I wanted to wrap my arms around her and protect her from seeing anything bad in the world, but something in her eyes told me she knew too well what the world was like and could take care of herself. Which is why it was so damn confusing that she clung to my cousin like he was a lifeline.

Tyler told me he was bringing his friend to live with us, and that she was a girl. I’d remembered hearing her name over the years, but whenever he spoke about her, it seemed like they were only friends, so why did he hold her hand and kiss her damn cheek? I couldn’t even stop the growl that came from my throat when I saw it. Then freakin’ Brynn. Girlfriend? Really? We’d gone on two god-awful dates last year and I told her before school let out that I didn’t want any form of a relationship with her. I thought we’d been clear since she’d avoided me all afternoon until Cassi and Ty showed up.

When Cassi first spoke, I had to force myself to breathe. Her voice was soft and melodic. It fit her perfectly. She was petite and even with how short she was, those legs in those shorts could make any guy fall on his knees and beg. I couldn’t stop thinking about how she’d feel in my arms, how she’d look in my truck or on my horse. And yeah, I’m not gonna lie, I’d already pictured her beneath me . . . but one look at her and there was no way not to.

After Brynn guided her away, it took a huge effort to stop watching her, but I didn’t want to let on to Tyler that I was already completely taken with her.

“She’s mine, Gage. Let’s get that clear right now.”