Never Say Never (21 page)

“Hey Kitty..how was the park?”

“Fine.”

“Did Cameron find you?” Rebecca asks.

I throw my bag down on the ground, acting like two year old about to throw a tantrum.

“You told him where to find me?”

My dad interjects, “Kat, Rebecca is just trying to help. She knows how you feel about him.”

I stare at him with complete disgust, “You told her?”

He answers with a nod.

I start to walk up the stairs, “That’s just great. Let’s scream it out to the world. Kat’s not a virgin anymore.”

After I say it, I wish that I can take it back. The reason, Rebecca was right up my tail, following me up the steps.

I storm into my room, about to slam the door in her face, when she pushes it open.

“Kat...this is crazy. You need to talk to someone. I mean look at you?”

“I have nothing to say to you.”

“Well, I have something to say to you. So sit down and listen,” she yells.

Wow, where did that come from? I didn’t think miss perfect had it in her. If she thinks I’m going to pay attention to anything she has to say, she has another thing coming.

“We haven’t talked about your prom and I was just wondering how...well, how exactly do you feel about Cameron?” She asks.

I wasn’t expecting this.

I shut my eyes, throwing myself onto my bed, my feet dangling off the sides. “It’s none of your business,” I moan.

“I thought maybe if I shared my prom, maybe you could share yours.”

I sit back up, “Are you serious? You want me to tell you about having sex with Cameron?”

She doesn’t miss a beat. “Yeah, why not? This is what girls do.”

“I already told you, you’re not my mother and you’re not my friend and you never will be. So stop acting like it.”

She keeps talking, as I pull the pillow over my face.

“My prom started as the most beautiful night of my teenage life. I was seventeen, I had the perfect dress on, the perfect date by my side. It all happened so quickly. I knew he’d been drinking with his friends, but at the end of the night, when we were all hanging at a friend’s lake house afterwards.” She pauses before she turns to me, “He raped me, Kat.”

Oh shit! I wasn’t expecting that. How the hell can I be mean to her right now? She’s spilling her guts and I’m behaving like a complete bitch.

I don’t remove the pillow, but I say, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It was a long time ago. But, don’t think for a moment that I wouldn’t kill for someone like Cameron to have taken me instead.”

Now she strikes an emotional cord. I sit up.

I mumble, “You don’t know anything about Cameron.”

“I know you love him, and I’m pretty sure he feels the same way about you.”

I don’t even know why I say it, but I do, “I’m afraid of the way I love him.”

“Why?”

Okay, I guess we’re having a moment.

“I guess, because my mom, and college. It’s just going to hurt too much when school starts. He’s going to Colorado State and I’m going to Arizona. He’ll end up meeting someone else. It’s just better this way.”

She sits beside me, running her hands through my hair.

“It doesn’t have to be. It can work out if you want it to.”

I lie back because I can’t take her touching me right now. What I really want is my mom, or him...not her.

“Do you want to go with him to visit his father?” She asks.

This woman never gives up.

“I did, but not now. I’ve pushed him away...it’s over.”

“I’m pretty sure that boy would take you back in a heartbeat.”

“It’s not the point. I don’t want to anymore.”

“Kat, you don’t know me very well, but I know a lot of people. One in particular owes me a huge favor.”

Okay, so she’s peeked my interest.

“What does that mean?”

“It means you don’t have to go to Arizona. If you really want to be with him, I can make the call. Just say the word.”

I’m still confused.

“Where else would I go or want to go?”

She stands up, smoothing down her shirt before she blurts out, “Colorado State.”

I watch her as she walks away and out the bedroom door, pulling it shut. Speechless.

CAMERON

It’s graduation day. My whole family is here, standing beside me as I walk toward the entire senior class. My mother is smiling as my Dad walks next to her. I feel a sudden sickness as I take in her expression. She’s always wanted him back, but I know that’s the furthest thing from his mind. He’s not coming back. He has a girlfriend, one that I only know about. I wanted to tell her so many times, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

We’re all lined up, waiting to make the walk down the aisle in front of our families when I spot her. She’s way ahead of me. I see Matt walking behind her, talking into her ear. That pisses me off more than anything. I suddenly see flashbacks of that conversation. I see images in my head of him touching her, kissing her. I feel like jumping ahead, kicking his ass. I can’t. I hear the music fill the outside. It’s time to start the show.

As each name is called out, I wait patiently for them to get to the “H’s.” I want to look into those eyes, see her face. The last week of school was complete hell for me. Having to see her everyday sitting in History, at lunch, never once looking in my direction.

I hear her name being called to the podium. I’m choked up watching the smile on her face as she accepts her diploma. She’s smiling and I’m falling completely to pieces as I watch her. She looks beautiful...happier. I pull my hand to my face, wiping the sweat that starts to fall.

Max is next to me, I notice him watching me.

“Dude, you all right?” He asks leaning over.

No.

“I’m fine.”

“You don’t look fine.”

Gee, thanks for pointing out the obvious.

I don’t respond, afraid of what I might say.

When I hear my name called several minutes later, I force a fake smile as I walk up accepting my ticket out of here. Only, I don’t want to get out of here, unless it’s with Kat, and I know she’s not coming.

After the ceremony is over, I see her standing with some of her family and Rebecca. I start to approach her, when my Dad interrupts.

“So, do I get to meet her?”

I shake my head, confused.

“Who?”

He points to Kat with his eyes, “I’m assuming the girl that you haven’t been able to take your eyes off of is Kat,” he says as he wraps his arm around my shoulder.

I shrug, “It’s over. I told you.”

He smiles, “You sure about that?”

“Yep.”

“All right, son. We need to head to the party that you’re Mom is throwing.”

“I already have a party that I’m going to.”

“You can meet up with your friends later. She did a lot, so right now, you need to come with the family.”

I laugh at the family comment. We haven’t been a family in five years. Why start acting like we’re one now?

I’m still staring as I watch Kat walk off with her father’s arms wrapped around her shoulder.

Matt is having a huge bash tonight for all the seniors. His parents even hired us as the band. Right now, I want nothing more than to get loaded and forget about her. It’s too hard to watch her walking away.

“Let’s go old man,” I say pulling him in the opposite direction.

KAT

“I’m not going,” I say as Gabby pulls me to the side.

“Why not...you could use a night out. It’s been weeks.”

“You know why. Cameron will be there.”

She rolls her eyes, “So will Stephanie. Trust me she’ll be sinking her claws into him tonight before you can say Barbie, if you’re not there.”

She knows that name gets my blood boiling.

“He can be with whoever he wants,” I say as I hear my father calling me.

“I gotta run.”

“I’ll pick you up at eight,” she yells.

The girl is relentless. She never gives up. I’m really glad I found her this year and I hate disappointing her. But, there’s no chance of me going anywhere near Cameron tonight.

After the graduation ceremony was over, we head out for an early dinner. My father wants to go over to The Rosebud, but I just can’t bring myself to do it. It reminds me too much of Cameron. I chose Sullivan’s instead. I can use a good steak. It’s the three of us, joined by my aunt, uncle and cousin. My father presents me with a beautiful blue box all wrapped up with a little white bow. Inside is a beautiful necklace with a small locket dangling down.

He says, “I thought maybe you could put something special inside.”

“Thanks, Dad. It’s perfect.”

Rebecca chimes in, “So any big plans tonight?”

“Some party, but I’m not going,” I tell everyone.

I see Lauren looking at me, biting down on her lip like she wants to say something. She doesn’t.

After two not so painful hours with my family and Rebecca we make our way out of the restaurant and toward home.

***

I’m in my room listening to music when I hear a knock at my door.

“Who is it?”

“It’s Rebecca.”

I roll my eyes. “It’s open.”

“Your friend Gabby is downstairs. She says she’s here to pick you up for that party. Did you change your mind?”

I turn off the music and sit back down. “I’m not going. Tell her I’m sleeping or something.”

“Kat, I don’t want to put on the parental voice, but I insist that you go.”

I stand back up. “Excuse me?”

Her face relaxes. “It’ll be good for you, besides your father agrees. Now get ready and we’ll stall Gabby.”

“I said, I don’t want to go.”

“Do yourself a favor...get up now and go have fun. Please trust me, you need this as much as anything.”

She walks out with a grin on her face that looks bigger than Lake Michigan.

I remain still on my bed, running the different scenarios in my head. Before I know it, Gabby is peering down at me.

“Oh, my God...would you get up and make yourself beautiful,” she says tugging on my arm.

“Why are you doing this to me?”

“Because you’re my friend and I want you to be happy.”

“I am happy, can’t you see by my smile?” I ask, mocking her with a fake grin.

She pulls me up from my bed, swinging her foot to my backside before kicking it. “You have twenty minutes...move.”

I groan in defeat, but move into the bathroom. When I come out she has an entire outfit lying on my bed.

“A dress?”

“What? I’m wearing a dress, besides it’s not a dress, it’s a sundress.”

“You’re so demented,” I say picking it up.

I strip down, throwing the outfit she chose over my head...not happy.

“Why don’t you put your hair up tonight?” She asks.

“No.”

“Why not? It’s drives Cameron crazy.”

“That’s exactly why it’s staying down,” I say noticing how happy she is. “What are you so happy about?”

She lets out a little squeal before she speaks, “Max asked me out?”

“For when?”

Her eyes get big. “Tonight, so let’s go.”

Fabulous! I’ll be left standing in the corner alone for half the night. I decide right there, I’ll make an appearance for everyone else’s sake, but mine, and leave by ten.

My father drops us off. We could have walked, but he insisted. Probably making sure my butt gets there.

We make our way into the backyard. There are blue and orange balloons and streamers hanging over everything his mom could hang them on.

I keep my head down, not wanting to look up. I hear the music, I hear his voice singing. What the hell am I doing here?

CAMERON

I can’t believe she showed up. I’m watching her in disbelief, positive I wouldn’t see her tonight. I’m half in the bag, from drinking with Max before the party and now I need all my faculties to speak to her. Better yet, maybe I need a little more to get the courage to go talk to her.

I look back at Max, he sees her. I nod toward his backpack, filled with alcohol he brought from his house. I step back after the song, lifting the bottle to my lips, and take three huge swigs.

I hand it back to him, “I need a break.”

He nods and then speaks into the microphone, “We’ll be back in ten.”

I jump off the make shift stage, heading straight for her, her back is turned talking to Matt. Stephanie appears out of nowhere.

“Loved that set, Cam,” Steph says running her nails over my shirt.