Never Say Never (16 page)

“I’m going out,” I say, yelling in his face.

“The hell you are,” he yells back.

“If this is how it’s gonna be, I’ll go live with Aunt Rachel.”

“Be serious. You haven’t even seen her more than once since we’ve been here. She won’t allow it and I won’t allow it.”

“Then stop being like this. I told you nothing happened between Cameron and me. Why can’t you trust me?”

I see him trying to settle down, breathing in and out.

“Kat, sit down. Let’s talk about this?” He says, motioning me back to the couch.

“Fine.”

“Kat, this is all new to me, you need to understand that... I’m not use to this.”

“I understand how it looks, but you’re gone all the time with Rebecca. I’m alone ALL the time.”

“I’m sorry for that one too, Kat.”

For some reason I want to dig deeper and keep asking questions.

“When did you start seeing her?”

He looks down, not able to look me in the eye when he answers.

“I met her a while ago, on a business trip.”

“Where you still married to Mom?” I keep pushing.

“Yes, when I met her we were, but nothing happened back then.”

“Is that why Mom left?”

“No. Your mother and I really weren’t together for the last two years.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I didn’t want to tell you this back when she left, but I guess today is as good as anytime,” He pauses, looking into my eyes. “Kat...your mom had some issues for the last several years and she never really could be happy with us. It’s not your fault, or mine. It’s not something she has any control over.”

“What do you mean, issues?”

“She was sick. She checked herself into a clinic when she left. I only know this because they called me, she didn’t.” He looks away from me before he adds, “She’s bipolar.”

“What exactly is bipolar?”

“Let’s just say a major form of depression and leave it at that.”

“Where is she, now?”

“I don’t know. She checked herself out with no forwarding address.”

“How do you know all this? Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?” I scream.

“I’d call, keep tabs on her.”

I feel the tears building up, I wipe them away as they start to fall from my face. My dad leans in, hugging me.

“By the way, nice job on the conversation switch,” he says, teasing.

“I wasn’t...”

He cuts me off, “Yes, you were,” he says, laughing. “You’ve always been famous for it.”

“Back to the topic, please. Am I punished?”

He sighs, “No, not this time, Kat. You need to be careful with him.” I cant help but notice how he emphasizes the word you.

“Dad, every girl needs to be careful with every boy. That hasn’t changed in probably one hundred million years.”

His eyebrows raise and he slightly nods, “True.”

“What about Rebecca?” I ask, not even sure why.

“Would you feel better if I didn’t spend nights there, have her here?”

“God, no. You can stay there,” I say, disgusted.

“Only if you promise no boys in the house when I’m gone.”

“Deal. Let’s shake on it,” I say holding out my right hand.

He takes it, kissing it, “Deal.”

I walk back up to my room, realizing that we came to some sort of mutual understanding. I wasn’t punished, and he was going to continue seeing Rebecca. Now as I turn on my computer, I find myself typing in the words he said to me, bipolar. I read the following:

Bipolar is a complex illness. There are many different symptoms -- and several different types -- of bipolar disorder. The primary symptoms of the disorder are dramatic and unpredictable mood swings. The various types of bipolar disorder range from mild to severe.

I had no idea. I mean a few times I can recall her flipping out for some specific reason, but I always chalked it up to woman crap. God knows, I can get a little temperamental around that time of the month. I never knew she was so depressed and unhappy. How could I not see it?

The one thing I was thankful for after all the stuff that went down today was some sort of closure. I always thought I did something to piss her off, or my Dad did, but now I know why. She’s alive, living who knows where, she’s depressed and none of it was my fault. I shouldn’t feel better, but I do.

I reach into my purse, grabbing out my cell and call the one person that I need right now.

“Is it July Fourth yet?”

“Almost. It’s only a few months away. Why what’s wrong?”

“Everything,” I say.

“Spill,” she says.

I look down, as I’m biting my polish off, “Where do I begin?” I pause. “Let’s see, I almost lost my virginity last night. My father caught us still on the couch this morning. My father is still going to see Rebecca, and oh yeah, my mother has bipolar,” I tell her, spilling it all out in one deep breath.

Silence.

“Holy shit, Kat. Let’s rewind to the virginity part...was it Cameron?”

“Of course it was Cameron,” I say back.

“What happened?

“No condom.”

“Well, that sucks. What happened when your Dad caught you?

“He freaked at first, I mean I can’t blame him. We fell asleep on the couch watching movies, Cameron was still half naked, and then I threatened to live with my Aunt.”

“Would you have done it?”

“Which part? Sex or move?”

“Both.”

“Just the first part. I wanted to scare him into thinking I would move.”

“Did it work?”

“Yep. Then he got all tenderly and spilled about my mom and Rebecca.

“I’m sorry about your Mom.”

“It’s fine. I feel pretty okay with it now. I mean, I miss her like crazy, but at least it wasn’t me that drove her away.”

“True, but still I’m sorry.”

“Thanks.”

“I can’t wait to see you and meet this hunky hunk of yours.”

“You’ll like him, he’s really awesome.”

I hear her mother screaming in the background.

“I gotta go, but call me when you lose the big “V”.”

“Should I call you while he’s still lying next to me or the next day? I ask teasing.”

She laughs so hard I feel like she’s right next to me, “Bye, Kat and have fun.”

That’s it, I hear the dial tone a second later.

I move back in front of the computer screen, scanning different articles when my phone starts ringing.

“Hey.”

“So how much trouble are you in?” Cameron asks.

“None, it’s a long story. Do you want to meet up at the park under the tree?” I ask because I’m dying to see him again.

He hesitates, “Cant. Mom went ballistic when I got in this morning. She called Max’s last night and found out I didn’t stay there.”

“Max told her that?”

“No, his Mom told her.”

“Well, how much trouble are in?”

“In for the rest of the weekend, she’s pissed.”

I let out a deep sigh. The only thing I want to do is feel his lips kissing mine and that won’t be happening today.

“It’s okay. We’ll see each other Monday at school,” I reassure him.

“So we’re not keeping this a secret, right?”

“Only if you want to.”

“No way, before first period the entire school can watch me next to you. I don’t care, but listen I’m sending you that video before I delete it. Just in case.”

“Ewww, why?”

“I have a feeling you’re gonna need it,” he mutters into the phone.

“Are you kidding?” I ask.

“Nope. Max told me she drove by last night, saw my car parked down the street.”

“Great, another thing to worry about,” I say, “I’m sorry you got in trouble.”

“Me too, because right now I’d just about do anything to see you.” He stops talking, there is a brief pause. “I’m just kind of blown away that my mom got so mad, I can usually get away with anything.”

“I don’t think she likes me,” I say, waiting for a no she doesn’t comment.

“She doesn’t like the idea of you, but it’s not about you in particular.”

What? Wait a minute she doesn’t like the idea of me, she met for all of two-seconds.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You ready for this...she’s worried you’re gonna get pregnant and my college career will be thrown down the tubes.”

I don’t answer. Instead my chin is dropping to the floor at the last comment.

“Kat, you there?”

“Yeah, just one more thing to add to my worry list.”

He laughs, “Don’t sweat it, next time I go to the store I’m buying one for each day.”

“Buying what for each day?”

He laughs into the phone again.

“Stop laughing at me,” I whisper embarrassed.

“I wouldn’t laugh at you, I’m sorry. I’m talking about protection for the next time.”

I decide to tease him, “You have a pretty big ego if you think I’m having sex with you everyday.”

He gives it right back, “How bout’ a little phone sex, before I go crazy thinking about you.”

“So not happening.”

“I was just teasing. Listen I gotta go help my Mom with her precious garden.”

“Call me later, before you go to bed.”

“That could be dangerous, y’know?”

“I’ll take my chances. Bye Cameron.”

“See ya.”

Phone sex, boy I hope he was kidding with that one. That just sounds disgusting. When we finally do this, I want him front and center, no holds barred.

CAMERON

On Monday, I pull into the parking lot and see two things. The first thing I notice is Max and Ellie making out in the parking lot. The second, Stephanie pacing back and forth by her car. I steer my car as far away as I possibly can, but as I pull in, I can see her walking toward me.

Not only do I not want to see her, but I sure as hell don’t want to talk to her. I flip open my phone before I step out of my car and dial.

“Where are you beautiful?”

She sounds like she’s taking a breath in from my comment before she answers. “Still walking. I’ll be there in five.”

“Why are you still walking? Where’s your car?” I ask, as I storm right pass Stephanie.

“I like to walk when it’s nice outside.”

“All right crazy girl, but I’m driving you home. I’ll meet you at your locker.”

“Why? Do you want to just take me there in front of everyone?” She teases.

At least I think she’s teasing. She surprises me every time she gets like this. I would never have pegged her to talk a little dirty, but I like it. My mind starts remembering the way she looked without her shirt on. My body starts reacting as the thoughts of taking her up on her invitation enter my mind.

I moan. “Don’t tempt me,” I tease back.

I don’t realize that Stephanie is right up my ass, as I’m caught up going back and forth with the sex foreplay with my girl. I feel a tug on my arm, but I keep walking. The only thing I want right now, is to tease Kat even more.

She yells out, “Cam, please wait. I need to talk to you.”

I stop dead in my tracks, pulling my phone from my ear and turn in her direction. “Not interested in anything you have to say.”

For one brief second I feel like an asshole. You know what? I don’t care. I pull the phone back into my ear.

“I’ll see you in a minute, Kat.”

“Was that who I think it is?” She asks.

“Yep. Don’t worry about it.”

I hear her sigh through the phone, “See you in a minute.”

Then click.

I see her as soon as I turn down the left corridor. She’s covered in black from head to toe, except a little red lace peeking out from her shirt. I know right there, I definitely want to see that bra.

I can’t resist smiling when she sees me heading straight for her. I grab her by the loop of her black jeans, pulling her in so there is no space between us. The only thing I can think of is that lacy red peeking out from her shoulder.

My eyes cling to hers. I feel like I’m in a trance as I stare into those big brown eyes. I lean in, not being able to resist anymore.

“What did you do that for?” I ask, as she blows a bubble in my face, preventing the kiss.

“No kissing in halls, remember? School rules, not mine.”

I lean in so our foreheads are pressed together, “Pleaseee, no one follows that rule. Now kiss me.”

She looks around. “People are watching.”

“Who cares?”

I know I sure as hell don’t. I don’t care if I get detention for the rest of senior year for kissing her.