Never to Love (4 page)

Turns out, Finn is a financial genius and I’m damned good at the operations side of the business. Between the two of us and the first-class leadership team we put together, we were profitable within the first year.

We’d tried to get Sawyer to go into business with us, but he’d declined his inheritance, spewing some bullshit about being adopted and how being part of the family was more than enough and not wanting to take advantage of the people who had taken him in. Blah, blah, blah.

You’d think with a spiel like that, he’d been adopted as a teenager rather than an infant. Although he’d been a part of the family since he was a week old, grew up alongside Finn and me, and sometimes I would have sworn he was our mother’s favorite, Sawyer still felt like he needed to prove himself worthy of being a Ramsay.

Since Sawyer had opted out, the trust was split two ways instead of three. Finn and I agreed that made the hotel just as much Sawyer’s as it was ours. Even so, he still didn’t want to be part of our new family business. Instead, he followed in our mother’s footsteps and became a teacher.

Late one evening, I sat in my office trying to figure out where I’d gone wrong with Finn. Even though I’d been preaching to both of my brothers from the Book of Thomas since the day I realized the whole love and romance thing was nothing more than an illusion designed to fuck men over, I’d lost one of them to the dark side.

I couldn’t fail both of my brothers. I needed to keep Sawyer from being sucked in by an evil, gold-digging, manipulative, bitch like Kristy. Who, by the way, had not only made it abundantly clear she’d fuck Sawyer in a heartbeat since the day they’d met, she propositioned him shortly before she walked down the aisle to seal Finn’s fate. Sawyer seemed to be a believer of my gospel, but I couldn’t afford to ease up on him.

Speak of the devil.

“Hey, bro, I was just thinking about calling you.”

“You are not going to fucking believe what happened.” Sawyer sounded like he didn’t believe it himself, but he seemed happy about whatever it was.

“When I got off the plane after the wedding, I got a call from a woman claiming to be my sister.”

“Um, we don’t have a sister, dumbass.”

“We don’t, but I do. I met her this afternoon, and it’s for real. We have the same eyes, and I look so much like our mother. I have a family, Thomas!”

“You’ve always had a family.” Did meeting someone with the same DNA completely erase his entire life as a Ramsay?

“Shit, you know I didn’t mean it that way.”

“Whatever,” I grumbled, still irritated with him. “She could be lying. Lots of people have blue eyes.” If he wanted it badly enough, he could find a familial resemblance between the two of us, and we look nothing alike. “I have blue eyes.”

“This is different. They are exactly the same. I can’t believe I hadn’t noticed before. We’re going to have a DNA test to confirm.”

“What do you mean ‘hadn’t noticed before’? Do you know her? Do I know her?” Maybe he was tripping on magic mushrooms. Or maybe I had fallen asleep at my desk. Better yet, maybe I’d passed out after the best orgasm of my life and would wake up in Vegas. If that were true, I doubt I’d be dreaming about my brother. Dammit, back to shrooms or sleepy boredom.

“Everyone in the world knows her.”

“Sawyer, what the fuck are you talking about?”

“My sister is Marina Alexander.”

I burst into laughter at the most incredulous thing I’d ever heard. “Do you realize how ridiculous that sounds? It’s like saying Angelina Jolie is our first cousin.”

“Google her. Pull up a picture and take a closer look.”

“Dude, trust me, I’ve looked at her very closely over the years.”

Sawyer growled over the line. “Watch it, Thomas. That’s my baby sister you’re talking about.”

“Fine, I’ll look.” I shook my mouse to wake up my computer and then searched for my brother’s supposed long-lost relative. If it’s true, does that make her my sister? Adopted sister? Stepsister? Sister-in-law? Sister-I’d-like-to-fuck? Is it okay for me to fuck her?

Clicking on the first close-up photo, I studied the image carefully for a few moments. Admittedly, I’d never spent much time looking at her face.

“Are you looking?” Sawyer prodded.

“Yeah, yeah. I see what you’re saying,” I said, noticing the similarity between their eyes, “but I don’t see any definitive proof.”

“When I prove it, don’t think you’ll be getting anywhere near her.”

“Worried I’ll corrupt her?”

“Would you let someone like you near your sister if you had one?”

“Fair enough,” I replied. There really wasn’t any use in arguing with him since I knew the whole thing was a hoax. “But I can’t believe you’d deny her the fuck of a lifetime.”

So, one of my gullible brothers was being scammed by a celebrity impersonator, and the other was now married to someone who made my psycho ex look like June Cleaver.

When my phone beeped, I pulled it away from my face to check the caller ID.
Fuck me.
Apparently, people were psychic and could sense when they crossed my mind. Tapping the button to put the call on speaker, I told my brother, “I have to go. Talk to you later?”

Grumbling something about my dick not going anywhere near his sister was his version of a goodbye.

When the call with Sawyer ended, I tapped the screen to connect the other call.

“What the fuck is this, Thomas? Why was I just served with a subpoena?”

“Because you keep violating my visitation rights, duh.” Yes, I was childish, but I had to speak to her on her level.

“This says you’re suing for joint custody. Why do you want my son all of a sudden?”

“He’s
our
son, and there’s nothing unexpected about it. I didn’t fight you for custody, because you agreed to the visitation schedule I proposed. However, I’ve only seen my son five times in the past three months because you keep having things conveniently come up or you’re just not home when I come by to pick him up. My parents barely remember what he looks like. So, yes, I’m suing you for joint custody.”

Not only would joint custody give me more time with my kid, but it would also reduce the small fortune I sent her every month, which I knew for a fact didn’t actually go toward supporting Colton.

“You won’t win. I’ll make sure the court sees just how unfit you are,” she snapped.

Taking a deep breath to calm myself, I said, “We’ll see what happens. I have a visit scheduled for tomorrow evening. If you aren’t home when I show up, I’m calling the police.”

The bitch growled in frustration and hung up on me.
And people wonder why I have commitment issues
.

Juli

Two Years Later

“Hell. Fucking. No.” There wasn’t much I wouldn’t do for Marina, but this was near the top of the extremely short won’t-do list. To put it in perspective, hiding bodies was on the would-do list.

In the two or so years since I’d fucked Thomas Ramsay, I’d managed to fly completely under his radar. It wasn’t always easy, but it was worth it. Hearing stories about his fear of commitment and general assholishness didn’t make me believe he was any less dangerous than he had shown himself to be that night. In fact, the knowledge amplified the importance of staying away from him. On paper, someone like him had the potential to lull me into a false sense of security. However, back in Vegas, he’d asked for two more nights, and I wouldn’t put it past him to try it again.

I couldn’t really blame him for being addicted to my pussy. It was fucking awesome. Its addictive nature was one of the main reasons I’d implemented the one-night rule to begin with. Getting a guy hooked was cruel, but most men could recover from one night of exposure. Any more than that and there wouldn’t be a rehab facility on Earth that could save them.

Perhaps I should put a warning label on it, maybe a tattoo strategically placed at eye level that read, “Caution: Has been known to cause obsession. Fuck at your own risk.” Although a tattoo including the sentence “Fuck at your own risk” directly above the merchandise might not be good for business.

Thomas had become addicted after the first lick, and I doubt there was anything I could write on my body that would deter him from going back for seconds. It was just good manners to keep the temptation as far away from him as possible. The last thing I wanted was to watch him suffer as he craved something he could never have. However, if Marina had her way, I wouldn’t be able to continue my philanthropic efforts much longer.

When Jack told Marina he’d found her brother, and I found out it was not Thomas, thank God, I found no reason for her to know about my…familiarity…with her new family. That is until the asinine request Marina was making could force me to confess my bad judgment the night I’d met Thomas.

“Please? This is an amazing project that will help hundreds of kids every year—thousands when we expand into additional cities. Think about the PR opportunities surrounding something like this.” The damned woman knew my weak spot was work and wasn’t ashamed to use it to her advantage.

Okay, okay, I guess I could admit I liked supporting causes dedicated to helping kids, but only in an indirect, abstract way. Mentally, I’d felt like I’d been forty since the day I was born. Between not being able to relate and my general distaste for all things touchy-feely, I’d never meshed well with the youth of America. As long as I didn’t have to personally interact with anyone under the age of twenty-one, I could deal.

“I’m all for building a center for homeless youth and putting your names all over it—” It really was the best type of publicity money could buy. “—but there is absolutely no reason I need to be your representative at the planning meetings. I can find you a dozen qualified candidates by lunchtime.”

“We want you to do it because we trust you, and we know you’ll put your heart and soul into it. Not to mention you know exactly how to utilize our support to maximize exposure for the foundation.” The pleading in her freakishly blue eyes got me to give in almost every time, and it was beginning to wear me down. “It’s not like we want you to run the whole thing—there will be people involved who specialize in things like operations and finances. We’d like you to oversee marketing.”

Marina studied me for a few seconds, and it felt like she was reading every word, image, and experience that had ever passed through my mind. “Why don’t you want to do it? I know you’re always busy keeping our reputations spotless, but things have been kind of quiet since we’ve been spending most of our time in the studio lately.”

Doing voiceovers for an animated film did keep them out of the public eye for the most part. When they weren’t seen together for a while, I actually had to make them go out on a date to prevent “trouble in paradise” rumors before they began. When the rumors began before I preempted them, it forced me to get a little more creative.

“We don’t have any premiers to prepare for, and based on the nature of the questions you’ve been asking lately, I bet you’ve been spending a lot of time writing ‘just-in-case’ press releases to fill in the fifty hours of unpaid overtime you insist on working every week.”

On his way to the front door, Tate diverted his course when he overheard part of our conversation. “There’s no point in arguing with her. You know she’s irresistible.” He placed a kiss on the top of his girlfriend’s head. “You’ve worked on other charitable projects. What’s different about this one?”

They didn’t involve working with Thomas-fucking-Ramsay. Staring Tate down, a look of realization finally hit his pretty face.
Now he remembers
. Asshole.

“How about I take the next one that comes along? I’ll even go out and look for another project today.” The nearly identical expressions on their faces told me I wasn’t going to be able to get out of this.

With my eyes, I silently threatened Tate. All the asshole did was shrug. Something must have changed over the past two years because now it seemed as if he didn’t care if I told her.

“I need to get to work. See you later, babe,” Tate said, kissing her cheek this time.

When the front door closed behind the actor, I knew it was time to come clean, even though I really didn’t want to. “Here’s the thing. You know how I haven’t spent more than one night with a guy in years?”

“Yes, although I still don’t understand why.” I could also tell she didn’t know how it applied to the current conversation.

“Well, around the time you met Sawyer, I met his brother Thomas. It was before I knew about his connection to you.” Understanding lit her eyes. “Yeah, we fucked. Based on everything you know about him, he seems like just the kind of guy I’d go for, right?”

“Yeah, I once joked with Sawyer that Thomas’s commitment issues and extremely high self-esteem reminded me of you. I called him ‘Juli with a dick.’ Sawyer said calling you ‘Thomas with tits’ had a better ring to it.”

“Hey, I may run away from the first sign of yucky feelings, and I admit I know exactly how awesome I am, but from what I’ve heard, he’s a total jerk. I am
not
a total jerk.”

“That’s why I specified commitment issues and ego. You definitely aren’t a jerk,” she agreed. “Back to the topic at hand. What happened that made you avoid him for this long? I’ve seen you interact with lots of guys you’ve fucked.”

“He asked for two extra nights.” I shuddered at the thought. “We agreed up front it would only be one night, but apparently, his dick didn’t get the message. I can’t deal with that kind of clinginess.”

“Do you seriously think wanting to sleep with you three nights instead of one equates to him being clingy? If there’s one thing Thomas isn’t, it’s clingy.”

“We met out of town, and he was only going to be there three nights. Who’s to say he wouldn’t have asked for more if he hadn’t had a time limit? You should have seen the way he looked at me.”

“You’re a big girl and have never had a problem telling anyone no. If he gets clingy or annoying, which I don’t see happening, we can sic Sawyer on him. Please, just think about the kids we’ll be helping. Is there anyone you’d trust to do as good a job as you would?”