Nickeled-And-Dimed to Death (29 page)

“So the ex doesn’t have anything to support her claim?” Poppy asked.

“It looks that way.” Boone smiled. “And the court date is Monday. We should be fine.”

“Speaking of Bryce,” I said, “I’ve been thinking about poor Tsar. Since I can’t keep him because of Banshee, who here is going to adopt him?”

“Sorry.” Noah shook his head. “Lucky couldn’t handle another animal in the house.”

“And I can’t take him,” Tryg hurriedly said. “My condo has a no-pet rule.”

“Not me.” Poppy crossed her arms. “I’m allergic.”

We all looked at Boone, who started to shake his head, then nodded. “Okay. I’ll take the cat. After all, he did provide a key piece of the evidence that saved me.” He shrugged. “Hey, maybe having a furry grandbaby will get my folks talking to each other again.”

“They went back to not speaking?” I asked.

“Yep.” Boone sighed. “The minute I was cleared, they resumed the cold war.”

We all laughed; then Noah said, “I’ve been wondering about why Robinson called me the afternoon before the murder. At first, I thought he might be interested in dating my mother. But after hearing what he said to the chief regarding being a part of the right social circles, I think he was just kissing up to me.”

“Of course he was.” I raised a brow. “Haven’t you noticed that ninety percent of the town kisses up to you?”

“Right.” Noah’s tone was scornful. “Anyway, the only one I want kissing me is you.”

“Gag me.” Boone grimaced, and the conversation turned to other matters.

About a half hour later, I heard my phone chirp, excused myself, and headed to the ladies’ room. Once I was in the bathroom stall, I checked the message. It was from Jake. He’d been at my house, looking for me, but couldn’t stick around. He said his team was close to catching the bad guy and he and Meg were heading south. He warned that he’d be incommunicado until he returned.

In view of what had nearly transpired with Noah in his Jag a week ago, I was of two minds about Jake’s departure. While I was worried about his safety and I would miss him, it would be nice to have some breathing room in that relationship. I needed to learn to trust myself and my feelings, or I’d never be able to trust a man and his feelings.

Then again, since Jake was now on a road trip with his ex-wife the decision about which man I preferred might be taken out of my hands. Jake might end up back with Meg, and I was positive that Nadine would do everything in her power to keep Noah away from me. So who knew what the future held?

You may hear wedding bells when you turn the page for a preview of

Denise Swanson’s delightful, brand-new mystery in the Scumble River Mystery series,

Murder of a Stacked Librarian

Available in September 2013 from Obsidian in paperback and as an e-book.

S
kye Denison adjusted the stack of books in front of her, making sure that she was completely concealed behind their brightly colored spines. It was the morning of December 23, exactly a week before her wedding, and she was hiding out in the Scumble River Public Library.

She was supposed to be working on writing her vows, but in truth, things had gotten out of hand and she was avoiding all the people who were stressing her out. She’d known from the minute she set the date that her mother would drive her crazy, but she hadn’t anticipated that others would join May on that trip. As it turned out, the entire town had an opinion. From the flowers for the church to the menu at the reception, people stopped Skye wherever she went to lobby for their favorite selection.

Didn’t they realize that all the choices had been made months ago, and it was far too late for Skye to change her mind now? Unless she just called off the whole shebang, and went back to her nice, boring, regular life. Surely Wally wouldn’t mind delaying their marriage another year, or two, or ten. He was a patient guy and didn’t deserve the psycho bride she was becoming.

Skye’s fiancé, Wally Boyd, the town’s chief of police, had been strangely exempt from all the hoopla. It might have been his age—he was forty-three—or the fact that he had been married once before, or because he was male, but no one was making helpful suggestions to him about the decor or the food or telling him what not to wear.

Sighing, Skye closed
The Everything Wedding Vows Book: Anything and Everything You Could Possibly Say at the Altar—and Then Some
and added it to her camouflaged pile. Next up was
Yes! I Will! I Do!: Your Step-by-Step Guide to Creating a Wedding Ceremony as Unique as You Are
. She examined the pale pink cover, then flipped it open to the index. As she ran her finger down the column looking for the chapter on vows, a loud voice drew her attention to the circulation desk.

Chip Nicolet, the owner of the new health club, Guns and Poses, had backed librarian Yvonne Osborn against the counter and appeared to be enthralled with the beautiful woman’s many assets. The muscular man’s expression reminded Skye of her cat Bingo just before the Fancy Feast was spooned into his bowl—hunger, impatience, and entitlement all mixed together in a quivering mass of desire.

Yvonne had been substituting for Scumble River’s regular library director since June, and during that time, Skye had noticed that although the temporary librarian had the hourglass figure of a Playboy bunny, her outlook on life was more like Margaret Thatcher’s than one of Hugh Hefner’s average cottontails. Apparently Chip hadn’t gotten the memo on that because he was staring at Yvonne’s considerable bust line and nearly drooling.

Happy for a distraction from her wedding woes, but more than a bit alarmed at the man’s belligerent attitude, Skye pushed aside a pillar of books and leaned forward to hear the conversation. She felt a twinge of conscience at blatantly eavesdropping, but anything was better than thinking about the big day looming on her horizon like a dentist appointment for a root canal. Why, oh, why hadn’t she eloped like her brother and his new wife had?

Skye saw that Yvonne was trying to shush Chip, but evidently the health club owner had never heard of the “whisper in the library” rule because he boomed, “Come on, say you’ll go out with me.”

“No.” Yvonne’s expression was adamant. “Now move aside and let me do my job.”

“I promise you, you’ll have a good time,” Chip persisted, edging closer.

“I seriously doubt it.” Yvonne took a deep breath, causing her chest to expand and Chip to stare. “Is there a book I can help you find?”

“A book?” Chip looked confused.

“You know, those items lined up on the shelves.” Yvonne pointed to the crowded bookcases around the room. “The reason you came into the library.”

“I know what a book is. What? Do you think I’m an idiot?” Chip snarled. “I just didn’t realize anyone still read them.”

“Yes. Many people, whose attention span is longer than a television commercial, still read books.”

“I’ll make a mental note of that,” Chip jeered.

“That might be difficult for you to do since your pencil is obviously out of lead.” Yvonne’s voice was cool. “And since it doesn’t appear you’re here for any of the library’s usual services, is there something else I can help you with? Perhaps directions to the bathroom?”

“What?” Chip wrinkled his brow. “Why do you think I need to go to the can?”

“Frankly”—Yvonne placed her palms on Chips well-developed pecs and pushed, but he didn’t budge—“I don’t think about you at all.”

“Well, you should.” His gaze dropped to her curvy bottom. “A hottie like you should be hooking up with someone like me, not acting like a nun. Who are you saving it for?”

“Myself.” Yvonne finally managed to step to the side and wiggle past him. “I’ve found that I’m much better company than most men.”

The library was divided into two main rooms, and Yvonne pushed a cart toward the section where Skye was sitting. A few wooden chairs and tables shared the cramped space with jam-packed bookshelves and racks stuffed with magazines. Yvonne stopped a few feet from Skye and started reshelving novels, pointedly ignoring the man who had followed her.

When Chip moved in front of Yvonne and put his palm on her shoulder, Skye’s initial twinge of alarm grew stronger, and she dug her cell phone out of her tote bag, ready to call for help.

“Go out with me tonight. There’s a new spot in Kankakee that’s supposed to really rock,” Chip wheedled.

“No.” Yvonne glanced down at the wet spot where his fingers had rested and said, “If you’re perspiring this much standing still, I’d hate to see you dancing.”

“If you ain’t sweating, you ain’t doing it right,” Chip boasted. He smoothed a hand over his shaved head. “If you don’t want to go to a club, we could grab a pizza and go to my place.”

“No.” Yvonne reached around him and slid a hardback into place, straightening the spine before adding, “Thank you, but I have other plans.”

“Babe, you don’t know what you’re missing.” Chip flexed his right arm, making his biceps bulge. Although it was winter, he had on a short-sleeved black T-shirt, formfitting jeans, and leather trainers.

“I know exactly what I’m missing,” Yvonne assured him, narrowing her baby blue eyes. “Just because I don’t want to date a Neanderthal like you doesn’t mean I’m living a life of chastity.”

As Yvonne reached around him again, Chip’s hands spanned her tiny waist and pulled her against him. “Don’t call me a Neanderthal.”

“Would you prefer that I call you a caveman?” Yvonne stood perfectly still, seeming unwilling to give him the satisfaction of struggling. “Or perhaps Homo sapiens neanderthalensis?”

As Chip’s face turned the color of the Scumble River fire engine, Skye rose to her feet to intervene, but before she could move toward the out-of-control jerk, Chip roared and leaped backward, clutching his groin. Skye’s attention had been on the health club owner, but when she turned to look at Yvon
ne, she saw the librarian tucking a pink palm-size stun gun into her blazer pocket.

Chip stared at Yvonne for a couple of seconds, then threatened in a shrill voice, “You’ll be sorry for that, bitch. You may look like Jessica Rabbit, but just remember, she was easy to erase.” He hobbled out of the library, muttering about women who didn’t know their place.

Yvonne met Skye’s concerned gaze and shrugged. “He’s not the first man to confuse how I appear with who I am.”

“I’m sure he isn’t,” Skye sympathized. She’d learned long ago that being a round woman in a world obsessed with sticklike supermodels wasn’t easy either. “Are you afraid he might retaliate?”

“Not a chance. One thing my ex-husband and his business partner taught me was how to take care of myself.” Yvonne patted her pocket. “And I have some little friends to help.”

“Where did you get that Taser?” Skye asked. “I’ve never seen one so small.”

“Online. Best ninety dollars I ever spent.” Yvonne handed the gadget to Skye. “Since you’re the psych consultant for the police department, you should convince the city to buy you one. I can give you the details.”

“Thanks.” Skye examined the tiny device, then returned it to its owner. “I doubt the mayor would approve the expense. He thinks my services are pretty useless.”

“Even though he’s your uncle?” Yvonne asked. Then, without waiting for Skye’s answer, she added, half to herself, “Of course, he actually thinks the entire PD is pretty useless.”

Skye opened her mouth to ask what Yvonne meant, but the librarian spoke again before Skye could form the question. “How about requesting the weapon from the school district? As the school psychologist, you probably deal with some fairly violent adolescents.”

“True.” Skye’s eyebrows shot up. “But I’d never Taser one of them.” She added under her breath, “Maybe one of their parents, but not the kids.”

“Everyone needs to be prepared for the consequences of their actions.” Yvonne crossed her arms. “Especially teenagers.”

“Right.” Skye decided it was time to end the conversation and pulled a book from the pile toward her. “I better get back to writing my vows or I’ll be ad-libbing next Saturday.”

“Yes, you’d better.” Yvonne headed toward the small office wedged into a corner of the library, but said over her shoulder, “I hear your wedding is the social event of the season around here. You don’t want to ruin it by being unprepared.”

Skye shivered. It was probably just bridal jitters, but she had a bad feeling that something would mar her big day. She only hoped that all of her carefully laid plans didn’t unravel like a poorly sewn bridal gown.