No Matter What (30 page)

She nodded.
 
“I’m fine. Tired, but fine.”

“It’s been a long day, I know, honey.
 
But we’ve really got to go tonight.
 
Even if it’s just for a couple of hours.”

She yawned, really just wanting to curl up in bed and watch some trash TV.
 
“I know.”

Her stylist and hairdresser were waiting downstairs and she knew she’d have to make a move in a minute and go and get ready, but she really did feel incredibly tired, drained almost, and she had no idea why.
 
It wasn’t like today had been an unusually busy day on set.
 
Most of her scenes had involved sitting down.

“Are you sure you’re ok?” Michael asked, coming over to her, putting a hand on her forehead.
 
“You don’t look too good, baby.”

“I’m fine,” she smiled.
 
“Really.”

He sat down beside her and put his arm around her shoulders, pulling her against him and she snuggled into him.
 
He’d just come out of the shower and he was still warm and damp.
 

He gently kissed her forehead and she looked up at him, her stomach flipping over again.
 
There was something about this man that had got her so bad she didn’t know what to do with herself some days.
 
He wasn’t good looking in the same way that Kenny was, but he was still handsome, with those beautiful eyes and that gorgeous mouth and that ability to make her smile just by looking at her and she loved that.
 
She loved everything about him.

His mouth touched hers gently and she moved closer, putting her hand to his face, kissing him back.
 
“Thank you,” she whispered, gently stroking his face.

He smiled.
 
“For what?”

“For loving me.”

“Oh, believe me, honey, that is not a problem … Jesus, you’re killing me here …”

 
She kissed him again, slowly.
 
“It’s my job, Mr. Walsh.”

He took one last look at her before reluctantly dragging himself up off the sofa.
 
“Well, I suppose we should make a move or we’re never gonna get anywhere tonight,” he sighed, tightening the towel around his waist as he quickly kissed her forehead.
 
“Back in a second.
 
Just gotta go get the suit on.”

She watched him leave the room and pushed herself up off the sofa, sighing heavily, untying her robe as she made her way over to her walk-in closet.
 
If she didn’t start getting ready soon she’d lose what limited motivation she had left altogether.

Slipping on the most beautiful underwear, the kind of things she’d looked at in magazines but could never have afforded before, she looked at herself in the full-length mirror, cocking her head slightly.
 
She really did look tired.
 
The make-up artists had some work to do with her this evening but they’d already proved they could work miracles, and they’d need to tonight.

Wrapping her robe back around herself she walked out of the closet just as Michael came back into the room, already dressed in his suit, and it never failed to amaze her how quickly men could get ready.

She walked over to him, smiling, straightening his tie and kissing him quickly.

“You look very handsome, Mikey.”

He smiled back.
 
“Why, thank you, Ms. Steven.
 
And you, I have to say, are looking incredible.”

“Shut up.
 
I look like crap.”
 
She certainly felt like it, that was for sure.

“Never,” he whispered, his mouth so close to her ear it made her stomach flip again.
 

But, as a very strange feeling suddenly washed over her, combined with that overwhelming tiredness she’d been experiencing all day,
India
knew something was wrong.
 
Something was very wrong.
 
She just didn’t feel right, she felt light-headed and sick and she held onto Michael as a wave of dizziness cascaded over her, that overwhelming tiredness that she just couldn’t control coming back with a vengeance, causing her to feel so weak she was finding it hard to stand up.

Michael looked at her as she suddenly went limp in his arms, falling against him like a rag doll and he quickly grabbed her, picking her up as her eyes closed.
 
But, for
India
, the world had already gone black.

***

Terry listened intently as Reece told the story, trying to explain everything as best he could because it wasn’t easy.
 
And the events of today had proved that leaving it this long had only made things worse, but Terry listened as he told him how he’d met their mother in the spring of 1967, whilst he’d been working in the North East of England as a young session musician.
 
Terry had always been led to believe that
India
was the result of a one night stand, nothing more, but that wasn’t the way it appeared now.
 
If what Reece was telling him was true, and he had no reason to disbelieve him, it had been a full on affair.
 
Reece and his mother had, at one time it seemed, been in love.
 
It was just so hard to imagine that could ever have been the case.
 
But, as Terry watched Reece explain about his past, about the person he’d been before
Hollywood
, he could understand just why his mother had fallen for him.
 
Reece had been the kind of man his mother had always really wanted, the proverbial ‘bad boy’.
 
The complete opposite of his father.

“She came over to
Ireland
,” Reece carried on, looking at Terry all the time, trying to make him understand as best he could.
 
“I’d moved back over there but I wanted to see her ... I still wanted to see her even though I knew it was wrong.
 
She was married, she had a child ...”

“And she thought so little of her family that she just dropped everything and went over there, to see
you
,” Terry said, leaning back against the breakfast bar, a glass of brandy in his hand.
 
“Jesus, I was barely three years old!”

Reece took a large swig of his drink, refilling his glass immediately, holding the bottle out to Terry, who shook his head.
 
He still had to go into work at some point today, no matter how little he felt like it now.

“I’d got myself into all kinds of shit,” Reece went on, looking out of the French windows.
 
“I’d got involved with these guys ... I was young, they told me I could make loads of money and I needed the cash.
 
I had plans.
 
I wanted to move to
London
, I needed the money to put myself through drama college.”

“What kind of shit?” Terry asked, putting his empty glass down and folding his arms.

“Drugs.”

“Taking them?”

Reece shook his head.
 
“No.
 
I never touched them, well, apart from smoking the occasional joint.
 
I was involved in dealing.”

“Jesus, Reece ... did mum know?”
 
Reece nodded and Terry gave a cynical laugh.
 
“And she didn’t
care
?”

“She got the benefits.
 
Expensive gifts, nights out, new clothes.
 
That’s all she cared about.”

Terry couldn’t believe he was listening to this.
 
He hadn’t even been aware that his mother had briefly left his father when he’d been a toddler, but it explained a lot about the reason why their marriage had never been the same again once she’d returned.

“We were at a festival,” Reece continued.
 
“It was the late 60’s, drugs were rife at these things, we could make thousands over a weekend ... but at this one ...”
 
He broke off, looking out of the window again.

“What?” Terry asked.
 
“What happened?”

Reece sat down.
 
He had a headache that was getting worse by the minute.
 

“Somebody died, Terry.
 
A young student.
 
Others were taken ill; it must have been a bad mix we were selling.
 
I never knew where it came from, I just did what I had to do.
 
But people started asking questions and I started panicking so to make sure I kept my mouth shut I was paid a lot of money and told to get out of
Ireland
.”

“Christ,” Terry sighed, pushing a hand through his hair again.

“I did as I was told, Terry.
 
That was all I
could
do.
 
You didn’t mess with these guys.
 
If they told you to do something you did it so I took the cash and moved to
London
.
 
I changed my name, became a whole new person.
 
It was the only way.”

“And you didn’t tell mum?”

He shook his head.
 
“There wasn’t time.
 
I didn’t want to leave that way but under the circumstances I had no choice.
 
I had no idea she was pregnant, Terry.
 
If I had - well, who knows ... but she couldn’t get in touch with me because she didn’t know where I was.
 
She obviously went back home to
Newcastle
.
 
Back to her family … it was probably for the best.”

“You think?” Terry sighed again.
 
How different everyone’s lives would have been if things had played out that other way.
 
“So, when did you find out about
India
?”

“When your mother decided to start blackmailing me for money.
 
I gather it was just before she divorced your father.
 
To be honest, I’m surprised she waited as long as she did.”

Terry couldn’t believe this.
 
It was like some plot from a movie.
 
You couldn’t make it up.
 
“When you saw her, that night in
Newcastle
, when you saw
India
... did you know then?”

Reece nodded.
 
“Coincidence meant I’d been filming over there and it just seemed like the perfect opportunity.
 
I’d had people looking for her ... I’d known where she was for a while.”

“And bringing her over to
L.A.
?
 
The screen test …”

“That wasn’t planned, no.
 
Something just kind of clicked the second I laid eyes on her and I … I took a chance, a very big chance.
 
The whole premise I used was ridiculously far fetched.
 
It was a huge risk.
 
But I had to do it, I had to see her, I had to know who she was, this young woman I didn’t even know had existed for all these years.
 
I had to go back to L.A., and if the only way I could spend some time with her, get to know her, was to bring her back with me then that was the only choice I had.
 
I did the only thing I
could
do.
 
I had no idea if she could cut it acting; I had no fucking idea, Terry.
 
But I didn’t care at the time.
 
I just wanted to meet my daughter.”

Terry looked at him.
 
“I don’t get it, though.
 
Why didn’t you just tell
India
who you were there and then?”

“There was no time, Terry.
 
And you can’t just come out with something like that.
 
As much as I wanted to.”

“Ok ... so why didn’t you just tell my mother to fuck off?
 
How did you even know she was telling the truth anyway?”

“She was threatening to go to the press, threatening to tell everyone about my past.
 
She’d put two and two together and realised I’d had something to do with the death of that boy and I wasn’t willing to call her bluff.”

“Jesus, Reece, what a fucking mess!
 
How the hell did you let it get this far?”

“I don’t know, ok?”
 
He was tired and he was shouting, which wasn’t helping his headache.
 

He sat down, putting his head in his hands for a few seconds before looking back up at Terry, his voice quieter now, calmer.
 
“I’m sorry, Terry.
 
I’m sorry.
 
But I’ve had this weight on my shoulders for so long ... y’know, it’s almost a relief to have it out in the open at last.”

Terry looked at him, a man shattered, drained of all emotion and understandably so.
 
“Is this the last you’re going to see of her?”

Reece looked up.
 
“Angie?
 
Yes.
 
She’s gone now.”