No Strings Attached (11 page)

"Yeah, that's about the only difference,"  Talon agrees and we all start to look at Taron. 

"Don't look at me.  I've already committed myself to this woman.  She's working on getting there.  It's all good.  I'm not going anywhere, so there's no hurry."  Ivy drops her head and places her finger inside Heaven's little grip.  I rush to change the subject for her sake.  When she's ready, she'll do it.  She's Ivy Adams.  You can't make her do anything she doesn't want to do without pure hell to pay.

Chapter Twelve

Lilly

Spending the trip like this is exactly what all of us need.  Catching up on life and what all of them went through during our break is interesting.  It's also nice to get to know some about the security team.  Only two guys are with us, but they offer up a few stories on the others.  Those guys are a mess and it's funny to hear all of those stories.  They seem so stiff and boring, but these stories prove they are capable of having just as much fun as a rock star.

We arrive at our hotel stop for the night.  Some of the guys are talking about going out tonight and Luke is pushing for me to go with them.  I'm up for a night out on the town, so I agree.  After all, what could go wrong with my own security team surrounding me?

I hurry and dress the part, putting only a little makeup on this time.  It's nice to give my face a break from performance night. 

Luke knocks on my room door just as I finish and we make our way down to join the guys in the bar of the hotel. 

"Well, hi there, Lilly.  Are you ready to go out with the guys?"

"Ready as I'll ever be." 

Aiden introduces me to all of his crew, "Lilly, you may know some of the guys, but I'll do a run through anyway.  This is Drew, Colin, David, and Zander.  These guys work day and night to keep you safe."

"Nice to officially meet all of you."  Each of them comes forward to shake my hand.

"This isn't all of them, just the ones who want to go out with us.  Tonight they're off the clock."

"Let's get going.  I'm ready to smash some beers and have some fun."  Luke starts to move toward the door. 

We step out the doors of the hotel and there's a large SUV waiting for us.  Aiden talks with the driver and we all file in.  I take the very back and Luke climbs back there with me.

We arrive at the club, and the line outside makes me wish I had worn pants.  The chill in the air is going to suck while we stand here.  Aiden keeps walking to the front and then finally waves us forward after talking to the bouncer at the door.  It's nice having VIP status for once. 

This place is massive.  I notice the sign at the door says 'Club Volume'.  I see where it gets its name right away.  The dance floor is full and there's hardly any space around the bar.  Luke moves up against the bar and orders us a round of tequila shots and a beer each. 

"What are we toasting to?" he asks me and I hate this part.  Taron and Ivy usually handle all the toasts.  It isn't fun to be put on the spot.

"Um.... To living life, all the way to our last breath."  He raises his shot and we take it back. 

A kick ass song comes on and I can't resist moving with the music.  It's what I do.  I take a few drinks of my beer and move to the dance floor.  There are a few girls who move in to dance near me and we have a great time dancing through a few songs.  A slow song comes on, so I start to walk off the dance floor. 

Luke grabs my hand and pulls me back out there.  I wish he wouldn't do things like this.  It really messes with my head.  He's done so good with keeping at a distance lately.

We start to dance and he pulls me in close.  Our movement is slower than the song is, but I'm just following his lead.

"You always have to shake that ass of yours, don't you?"  I look at him in confusion and try to figure out why he's bringing this up now.

"I was just dancing."

"I know.  You're trying to kill me,"

"Sorry."

"Don't be, free bird.  I enjoy watching you like that.  It's how you are on stage." 
Free bird?

"Did you just call me free bird?"  His smile grows when I ask.

"Damn.  I wasn't going to ever call you that out loud."

"Why would you call me that?"

"One of my favorite moments is when you and I first played that song together.  And besides that, you remind me of a free bird on stage.  You should never be caged."  I remember the time he's talking about.  It was one of the nights at Smitty's before we went on tour the first time.  We used to play old music just to get the fans moving.  Lynyrd Skynyrd is an easy crowd pleaser.

"I think
you're
the free bird.  If you listen to the song, it's you to a tee."

"Maybe so, but it's
your
nickname now."  We finish the song before he pulls me to the bar for another shot.

"Your turn this time."  I'm going to do my best to avoid having to lead in toasts.  The more I drink, the bigger chance I'll say something I shouldn't.

"To never being caged." 
Well, if that isn't one hell of a toast.

We lay it back and I turn to hit the dance floor again.  I don't want to stand there and let him see me disappointed in the fact that he never wants to settle down.  I wasn't supposed to fall for him.  The problem is, I had already begun my decent before I made that promise to myself. 

Making it a mission to enjoy myself tonight, I dance with a few guys who ask me.  All of them keep it clean and there aren’t any issues.  The next slow song comes on and I know I need to get off this stage fast.  If he tries to dance with me on this one, I'll lose it. 

'Say Something' is not the song to try to face him during, especially with how I'm feeling right now. 

He moves around to stop my escape and leads me to the edge of the dance floor again.  I can't look at him as the words begin to play through the large speakers. 

I tuck my head into his chest and let him lead me again.  Trying to stop the tears when they won't stop falling becomes impossible.  He doesn't say a word during this dance and I turn to walk away as soon as it's over.  This song is unbearable and says so many things I want to say to him. 
Why would he insist on torturing me through that whole song?

The line to the bathroom is long, but a few of the women let me pass through quickly.  I'm guessing it's the tears running down my face that warrants their kind gesture.

I take the time needed to not look like a complete freak when I walk out of the bathroom.  Having an audience while I break down even further isn't a perfect scenario, but I have to work with what I have.

Walking out of the bathroom, I dread seeing him again.  I need to get a grip.  We are great friends.  We'll never be more than that.  He's not capable of anything more. 

I do my best to stroll up to the bar and ask for another shot with confidence.  He meets me and buys us both a drink. 

Avoiding the monster in the room is his specialty.  He begins to tease me and lightens the conversation to an easygoing feeling.  I choose not to dance anymore.  We need to eliminate any chances of me acting like a fool again if possible.

As the night goes on, the shots continue to go down.  He starts to run his hands over my back and puts his arms around me more than usual.  I'm starting to get whip lash from his on and off behavior. 

Luke

This night has been one of the strangest yet.  I'm having so much fun one minute, the next I've obviously upset Lilly.  It seems that we're past whatever it was that had her in tears.  I know she's going through a lot right now, but I plan to be here for her when she needs me.

Our drinking has continued and I'm pretty sure we're both completely lit.  I wave at Aiden and he starts to round up all the guys. 

Aiden has the driver take us back to the hotel and I help her to her room.  She's walking on her own just fine, she's just loud and having a lot of fun. 

I help her open the door to her room and she grips my shirt with both hands and pulls me into her room.  Her mouth crashes into mine and we both begin to tongue battle. 

Her desperate tugging on my shirt is awkward since she's shorter than me, so I help her lift it off.

"You're too fucking sexy for your own good."  Her boldness makes me laugh.  I know she's drunk.  This sucks.  I can't do this with her after everything we've just been through.  If we do this again, I need her to understand where I'm coming from.

I continue to kiss her.  This I can do and not feel like a complete jackass in the morning.  I need to know that she'd have sex with me sober before I let this happen. 

Trying to calm her down long enough to defuse the fire between us both is not an easy task.  I turn her around to face away from me long enough to catch my breath and talk to her.

"Let's talk about this in the morning.  Tonight I'll just stay with you, to sleep and nothing more."  She seems to understand and starts to climb into the bed.  I watch her like she's a wild animal that could strike at any moment until she slides under the covers. 

I hate sleeping in jeans, but I guess I have no choice.  Lying in bed, I remember my shorts she borrowed.  Luckily, they're on top of her bag when I open it.  I'm pulling them up just as she stands up on the other side of the bed.  Her eyes focus right on my dick, and I slide the shorts up quickly to try to salvage my plan to wait.

She lifts her shirt over her head, drops her skirt and panties, then reaches around to drop her bra.  In less than ten seconds, she's completely naked.  She climbs back in bed and slides under the covers, grabbing her pillow in a cuddle hold like I've never seen before.

I think about this for a second.  This is Lilly.  We'll always have something special.  I can't ruin everything again if I don't know how she feels.

Leaving my shorts on, I slip under the covers and reach to turn off the light.  I hold still until I can hear her sleeping.

I feel her slide her hand over my stomach.  She's headed into my shorts and I'm ready and waiting for her when she gets there.  Sleeping next to this woman is not easy, especially when she's naked.  The light from the window tells me it's barely sunrise.

I let her move her hand up and down on my erection, causing my morning wood to grow to capacity.  She moves over me to lean off the bed and get a condom from my jeans.  I watch her tits in the process and start to grab a hand full of her when I get the chance.  She hands the condom to me and rolls onto her stomach. 

I'm not jumping straight into this like that.  I nudge her to roll back over and crawl between her legs.  I need to remind her of what
should
happen before we stick it. 

I run my tongue all the way around her clit and don't slow down until she's moaning through an orgasm.  Her whimper continues as I do, too.  Bringing her up to the point she's going crazy again is easy.  This clit piercing is like having a direct line to a quick orgasm. 

I pull away before she's able to release again.  Moving over her, I rub my cock over her piercing, applying pressure in exactly the right place.  In this position, I get to watch her body come undone for me.  There's a beauty to watching a female reach an orgasm.  Each one is a little different. 

I slide inside as she's coming down from the last one.  She closes her eyes and rolls her head back as I enter her. 
Damn, she's so tight
.

Moving slowly, I make this about pleasing her.  I don't rush any of it, and in doing so, it becomes so sensual.  This is new to me.  It's a strange feeling, but a great one.  We're both covered in sweat and exhausted when I finish. 

Falling on top of her, I lie there and feel the brush of her fingers over my back, cooling me off with every swipe  We lay like that for a couple of minutes before I roll off of her and pull her in to my side.

"We were supposed to talk about this before it happened again."  I need to start this conversation with her soon.

"Talking is overrated."

"I need to know that we're goo here."

"We are.  I love what we have together."

"Me, too."

"Just don't complicate things and we'll take it as it goes.  I know we're not exclusive, and you do, too, but that doesn't mean that we have to throw it in each other’s faces if we do anything."

"I agree."

Chapter Thirteen

Lilly

Last night with Luke was incredible.  It's hard not to feel more for him than he's willing to give, but I get it.  He's not there yet.  Maybe time will allow for that, maybe not.

Knowing we have a few days of break after tonight's performance makes me want to make an early trip home.  I can see my mom and spend some quality time with her before I have to leave out again.  I mention it to Luke and of course he wants to go with me. 

He finally gets my drift when I put my foot down that I just want to go home alone.  He's not happy about it, but he lets me go.

The drive back to Springfield is long and gives me plenty of time to think about things.  I really care about Luke, but he's not ready to be anything more than friends.  I can't self destruct during all of this.  There's a lot riding on us with the band, and besides that, he has no idea how I feel.  It's probably best he doesn't know just how much I care about him. 

I finally pull into the driveway of my mom's house.  She knew I was coming home tonight and is supposed to be waiting up for me. 

She greets me at the door with welcoming arms and a huge hug.  I spend hours telling her about our journey and I even tell her what went on with Luke and Garrett.  My mom has always been there for me.  She knows everything and I know she'd never judge me as harshly as I judge myself.

Her words don't cheer me up, but they make huge strides in me understanding my strengths and weaknesses.  I need to find myself before I try to find someone for me.  Luke is a great friend, and someone I'll always care about, but beyond that we have nothing at this point.  Yes, we crossed the line over friendship and it was fantastic, but our love for each other is a different kind of love.  When he settles, it'll be a with different kind of woman—one that yanks him out of his world and leaves him speechless.