Nobody's (16 page)

Alcohol brings out the truth in people. They lose their inhibitions and they speak with an honesty that a lack of courage usually holds back. That’s why this moment was so strange. That’s why I denied that I had that much wine to drink. Because at this moment, I felt like I was alone with Thomas. We were the only ones on the dance floor and the dim lights from all of the candles burning around us started to disappear. I was his and I was completely fine with it. I wanted him but it was more than that. It was beyond just a physical connection. I felt comfortable… safe in his arms. I couldn’t describe it. All I knew was that I had never felt this way with a client before.

I didn’t want the song to end. When it did, I felt a little bit of disappointment inside of me. Thomas lowered his arms from my sides and together, we stood in the middle of the dance floor. We weren’t dancing but I could sense that this moment might have meant something to him as well.

I leaned in close to him, gently caressing my lips against his neck and whispered into his ear.

“I want to dance with you, Mr. Livingston… Alone.”

I slowly pulled my head away from him and stared into his eyes. He nodded his head to me softly and offered his arm to me. I wrapped my arm around his, feeling the firmness of his bicep in my grip, and he led me out of the ballroom. The alcohol made it difficult for me to keep my footing so I leaned in close to him and used him as a crutch. I could have tried harder to walk straight. But I used it as an excuse just to be closer to him. William was waiting for us with the limo and an evening that felt like an eternity was now slowly drawing to a close.

Chapter 14

I gracefully stumbled toward the suite as I leaned over Thomas’s shoulder. William escorted us to our room. When he bid us good night, I could see a sly smile on his face, in place of his usually calm demeanor.

I took a seat on the couch to gather my senses. The wine had hit me harder than I’d thought. Thomas walked forward to light the fireplace and I hoped that the heat from the flames would somehow burn away the alcohol in my veins. I continued to sit there, while Thomas disappeared behind me.

“You’re not doing too bad, Angel.”

“I’m still here, Mr. Livingston. I’m still here and I’m coherent.”

He reappeared holding a glass of water with something bubbling to the top.

“Drink this.”

“This champagne is bubbly..."

“It's not champagne. The alcohol seems to be taking its effect.”

“And this is supposed to get rid of it?”

“No. It’s merely preparation for tomorrow.”

“Well, I’m definitely sleeping in,” I said, taking the glass from his hand and drinking the carbonated concoction.

“I’d have it no other way, Angel.”

“I… I appreciate your concern for me, Mr. Livingston.”

He took a seat next to me and I did my best to drink the rest of the glass. The whole time, Thomas just sat there and stared at me.

“How are you feeling?” he asked me.

“I’m… I’m doing okay, Mr. Livingston.”

I placed the glass onto the table and leaned back into my seat. The giddy smile on my face was a result of either the wine still in me or just sitting here and seeing Thomas’s kind face looking back at me.

I moved closer to him and kissed him upon the cheek, moving ever so closely toward his lips. He pulled away again just like he had on the dance floor and I was confused.

“Is something wrong?”

“No… No, it’s nothing.”

“You said there were people around. Well, now we’re alone. Nobody is watching. Nobody will know how you fuck me, as you said.”

“Yes… I did say that.”

He stood up from his seat and offered his hand to me. I pushed myself off of the couch and waited for him to lead me to where he wanted to have me tonight.

“How about on the bar, Mr. Livingston?” I whispered to him. “Sit me up on the bar, spread my legs…”

“I’d like to dance.”

“Dance? Where?”

“Right here.”

“In the middle of your living room? But there’s no music.”

“But there is.”

“Of course. You have a stereo system. What are you in the mood for, Mr. Livingston?”

He let out a soft laugh then placed his arms around me. I instinctively did the same to him, wrapping my hands around his neck and leaning in close to him. The only light came from the fireplace. I could only make out half of his face, the other side covered in shadows. Both of his eyes were visible. The green emeralds stared deep into my eyes and I fell into a trance.

“Close your eyes,” he whispered to me.

I did as he instructed without hesitation.

“Listen,” he whispered. “The flames are dancing on the wood to the side, they're brushing against your skin. Your heels are squeaking against the floor. My hands are rubbing on the fabric against your skin. Your breath escapes from between your lips as your chest heaves. The sound of my voice. My heart is beating.

“There is music, Angel. Can you hear it?”

“...Yes.”

“Dance with me, Angel. Nobody is watching. Nobody will see us. We dance for one another and nobody else.”

With my eyes shut tight, I listened to the sound of Thomas’s low voice. His soothing tone put me in a trance. My foot moved in a gentle rhythm, swaying to the silent beat he was putting into my ears. The alcohol was beginning to lose its effect. I wasn’t completely coherent but my focus was no longer on what I could see.

I felt Thomas’s touch. I listened to him breathe almost in unison with me. He pulled me closer to him and my heart started to race. The entire time, we continued to dance to the sound of the emptiness of his suite.

I danced with him for I don’t know how long. I didn’t protest. But the movement suddenly stopped and I felt him drawing away from me. I opened my eyes slowly and was met once again with his gentle gaze, his face still half-hidden in the darkness.

“Thank you for this dance, Angel.”

“Of course, Mr. Livingston.”

“Did you enjoy your evening?”

“Yes. I did. Thank you.”

“Spend the rest of the evening with me?”

I nodded my head and took a seat at the couch. He moved to the painting and the familiar sight of him taking money from his safe did something to me. I watched him place the cash on the table in front of me and I was no longer as moved or motivated as I was before. But it still didn’t stop me from being grateful for what he had given me.

“Now where would you like me this evening, Mr. Livingston? My offer for the bar still stands.”

I winked at him and Thomas turned his head down for a moment, unable to look me in the eye. He finally turned his head back up and the smile on his face disappeared.

“Here, Angel. I’d like you here tonight.”

“As you wish, Mr. Livingston. Fuck me on your couch…”

I grabbed his tie and pulled him close to me but he resisted.

“No,” he said as he pulled away. “Tonight, I’d just like you here. To sit with me.”

I nodded my head and respecting his wishes, I suddenly realized how exhausted I was. I rested my head against the couch, my eyes half open as I looked back at him.

“I am yours, Mr. Livingston. Are you sure all you want to do is look at me?”

“Some of the most valuable things in the world are something you can only look at.”

“You’re comparing me to a painting?”

“Or a diamond. Or a rose. They’re all beautiful things that were created.”

“But I’m different.”

“Yes, you're alive.”

“And a diamond can’t suck your cock.”

The alcohol wasn’t going away any time soon. I realized as I said it that my crude joke had ruined the mood. But Thomas chuckled softly, his laid back demeanor not allowing himself to be offended.

“You’re right,” he said. “But the best things are those we can appreciate in different ways.”

I bit my tongue. I listened to Thomas’s reasoning and allowed myself to enjoy this moment I was sharing with him. Nothing was happening. We were simply looking at one another in the light of the fireplace.

He inhaled deeply then exhaled a slow deep breath through his nose as he kept his eyes locked upon me.

“Have you considered Anthony’s offer?” he asked me suddenly.

“It’s only been a few hours. I… I don’t know if I should.”

“Why shouldn’t you?”

“Mr. Livingston…”

I sat up from my seat and gathered my thoughts.

“The contract I signed. It said that I couldn’t disclose the true nature of our relationship. Anything that happened behind closed doors was to remain a secret.”

“Yes.”

“Did you tell them the truth? Did you tell them who I am?”

“Who are you, Angel?”

“A hooker.”

He sat up from his seat and stared into my eyes. I looked down, unable to look back at him.

“Why would they offer me so much money?” I asked him. “I mean… That’s not something you would do for just some girl who’s supposed to be your ‘personal assistant.’ Hell, it’s not something you would do even if they thought I was your girlfriend.”

“Are you my girlfriend, Angel?”

“No. But that’s not the point.”

“What is the point?”

“I… I’m not… I do this because I need to make a living. I do this because I need to survive. I need the money. That’s what this is about. I have feelings. I… I won’t allow myself to be violated like I’m not a person.”

“Angel—”

“Just tell me if they know that I’m some whore you found on the sidewalk one night. I want to know if they want to use me and that’s why they’re willing to pay so much.”

The alcohol in my blood was now boiling. My heart was racing. I was breathing much harder and I could feel something building up inside of me that had come out of nowhere. I looked into his eyes and he remained silent.

“Please…” I begged him.

“No. You are my personal assistant, Angel. Everybody else can assume that you are something more but you will not tell them. I will not either. Angel...”

He took my hands into his and leaned in closer to me.

“You are free to make your own decisions. I gave you my word that I would pay what you asked for in return for your company. You already have enough money to be happy for a long time. You can leave whenever you like. Tonight’s payment is right there on the table, sitting and waiting for you. But it is for tonight. I ask again if you’ll spend the night with me.”

I looked down at his hands, thinking about everything he had just said to me. None of it made any sense. He was paying for my company but he wasn’t sleeping with me. One moment he was having his way with me in the back alley of a restaurant and the next he’s dancing with me in the silence of his suite.

“You make me swallow your seed from a glass of wine. The next night you hand me a drink because you’re worried I might get a hangover. I don’t know… What is it you want from me, Mr. Livingston?”

“Your company, Angel. The same as it has always been.”

His hands gripped tighter around mine. I looked up at him and there was a sense of desperation in his eyes.

“Just stay with me tonight, Angel. Just stay. Anthony’s proposal. Any questions you might have about what I’m thinking. Just forget about it. Worry about it when the time comes. All I ask is that you sit on this couch and spend the rest of the evening with me.”

I slowly nodded my head and his hands fell away from mine. I glanced at all of the money on the table then turned away from it, no longer wanting to think about all of the stress I was suddenly being put through.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “It’s just…”

I couldn’t explain it. I was a prostitute. Thomas himself was paying me. But for some reason, I was offended that Anthony had made an offer to me.

“You don’t have to apologize,” he said. “It’s my fault. Anthony got the wrong idea because I would prefer to keep this a secret.”

“Why must it be that way?”

“Because… I’d like to keep this between us. This time I have with you, I’d like to have it to myself. Just… please, Angel. Relax. Are you comfortable?”

I nodded my head again and together, we returned to leaning up against the couch, staring at the expression of calm and peace on one another’s face. My eyes grew tired but I listened to Thomas continue to whisper to me.

“It’s been so long,” he said. “I don’t remember the last time I had a moment like this.”

“Gabrielle…”

It spilled out of my mouth and when I realized what I had said, I hesitated to open my eyes. I could feel him staring back at me and I knew that he wouldn’t let this slide like the lewd comment I had made earlier. When I slowly opened my eyes, Thomas was staring back at me with a smile on his face that was barely there.

“I’m sorry. I—”

“Don’t apologize, Angel.”

“I shouldn’t have brought her up.”

“It’s not a big deal, Angel. I’m not the kind of man who’s afraid of his past. Wounds heal but they leave scars to remind us of what happened. You were bound to see it eventually.”

Even though I knew better than to push forward, my curiosity was getting the better of me.

“What happened?”

“Nothing interesting. Things didn’t work out. It’s a natural process. Even billionaires aren’t immune to it.”

“It can’t be that simple. There’s more to it than that.”

“Perhaps. But it’s a question that’s been asked since the beginning of time and one that hasn’t been solved.”

“You… You were in love.”

He turned his eyes away from me and looked at the fire next to us. He was lost in thought. In his eyes, I could see the wave of memories falling upon him.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Livingston. I’m prying—”

“We were. At least, I was. I thought she was different. But it didn’t take her long to realize that I was not the one for her. Being in love with me is not easy.”

“Why not?”

“I have thorns, Angel. Thorns that you can’t see but they cut deep. This is who I am. I can’t change that.”

“It will happen again.”

“What?”

He turned his eyes to me and I stared back at him, trying my hardest not to drift off to the inviting slumber my body was now craving.

“Love. You’ll fall in love again, Mr. Livingston.”