Odd Stuff (24 page)

“And you said
I
couldn’t be real?” He burst out laughing and kissed me.

I pulled back and stared at him, amazed. This was supposed to be the part where he tried to kill me.

“Have you gone mad?”

“I’m sorry. Gotta have a guy moment here. My girlfriend is the most powerful creature in two species.
Man
, I must be good.”

I glared at him. I shook my head. “Your ego is amazing.”

“Yeah, it kind of is,” he agreed and tried to kiss me again.

“I’m not your girlfriend.”
Focus on what matters, Janie
, I told myself and started again. “I am a monster, an aberration of nature.” I avoided him as he tried to kiss me.

“Yeah, me, too. Don’t worry, it’s fun to be a monster. I’ll show you.” 

“I don’t
want
to be a monster!” I yelped and darted away.

He pinned me to a wall and kissed me so thoroughly that I was clinging.

“Yeah, and I wanna see the sun rise. Get over it.”

CHAPTER Thirteen

I tried to get my hands free. “You idiot. Did you catch any of what I just said?”

“Yes. Kiss me.”

“No, you are bent, do you know that? If anyone found out what I am, then all of your kind, all of my mother’s kind, all of Mia’s kind…they all would want me dead.” 

“Yeah. Good thing you could kick their butts. Hey, you could kick my butt.” 

“Yes!” I shrieked. Finally, he got it.

“Good thing my ego has been honed for years and can take a little emasculation. That’s hot.” 

I sighed. “You aren’t getting this.”

“You are an amazing one of a kind person who could take over the world, but chooses to hide in obscurity rather than trying to control others. Clearly, you aren’t power hungry.” He shifted his grip on me, allowing my arms to drop to his shoulders, but kept me pinned to the wall with his body. “You are loyal enough to break your own rules to help a friend, and you’re equally loyal to the new ones you make—” 

“Tell me where you came up with that one and—” 

“In the bar. You sang to save me. You and Mia could have given me up, or you could have sat in her circle and waited for the sun to rise. You never even gave those options consideration. You sang to save me and nearly lost all that you’ve worked to save. For me.” He ducked and kissed my neck when I turned my face away.

“Yeah, well, looking back—” 

He snorted into my neck. “You are great. You are perfect. And if we didn’t have to go find your best friend, I would get us a room and show you how fond of you I am.”

I shifted in his arms again. “That would just show me how horny vampires are.”

He shrugged. “I won’t bother to deny it.” He kissed me, and I let a little hope in. Maybe I’m not all bad. Maybe what I am could be used for good. 

But I remembered the faces of the men in the bar years ago. I remembered Old Mother telling me I would betray my friends. 

I it shoved all down, deep down, and kissed him back.
No use borrowing trouble.
 

~

“So, did you tell me why your brother hangs out at a wax museum?”

“No, you hadn’t asked.” I looked at a wax Angelina Jolie posed next to a wax Brad Pitt.  

“Okay, I am asking.”

“The same reason that I hang out at a magic shop. Nothing better to do, I would guess.”

I rolled my eyes. “So, where is he?” 

“Downstairs.”

“And we are hanging around up here because?”

“Something is off. Someone should have come up already and escorted us down.”

“Okay, and if they don’t?” I looked at him expectantly. Playing twenty questions was getting old, fast. 

“I guess we could barge in…” 

“Great, let’s.” I pulled on his arm, and he shrugged. We headed to the back of the building. Two goons stood there waiting. 

One goon shook his head at us. “The master don’t want company.” For the sake of simplicity, we’ll call him Lug. 

“Go out the way you-ez guys came in,” replied his compatriot, Weasel.

“We are here to see Gregorian.” Vance did the bare-his-teeth thing, which must be some vampire code, I decided. I licked my teeth. Couldn’t fake that one. 

“Like we-ez said, he don’ wan’ no company.” Weazel crossed his arms over his chest.

“I’m his brother,” explained Vance. 

“We know who you ezz.” Weasel scratched his head. “And we ezz tol’ to escort you-ez out if there ezz any trouble.”

“Okay, escort me.” I stepped up.

Weasel looked confused. So did Vance, but he kept quiet. I guess he thought I had a plan.

I didn’t. I was just tired of talking to them. Weasel ended too many words with Z.

“Listen, lady, this don’t concern you.” Lug stepped up as he spoke threateningly. 

“Actually,” I quickly inserted, thinking fast. “It is my concern. He brought me here as a gift to his brother. If he doesn’t want me, I want escorted out so he,” I pointed back at Vance with my thumb. “Doesn’t try to grab me again and make me a gift to someone else.”

Okay, I had turned my amazing ability to bullshit back on and ran with it. I had no idea if vampires gave human women as gifts or not. I did remember some story, I think it was Arabian Nights, or maybe Cleopatra, where they wrapped somebody up in a rug and gave her as a gift.

Why wouldn’t vampires do that? Apparently, I was not off base because Lug looked at Weasel. “He don’t like to miss out on girls.” 

Weasel glanced at me. “Yeah, but he don’ wan’ no companeez.”

“What harm can it do?” I smiled. “Escort me out.”

“No, lady. You and the brother, come with me.” Apparently, what Lug said went because we were escorted behind a door marked
Authorized Personnel Only
. I think the most fascinating things must be behind those doors. I have yet to be let down. 

I followed Lug, Vance followed me, and Weasel followed him. We went down a hall, through a door, and then we were in a stone hall with burning sconces on the walls. I found this very atmospheric and decided to put them in on my next remodel.

Actually, when I act goofy, it is a tell that I feel really scared. I had a very bad feeling.  

It got worse the further below ground we got. 

Finally, we came to a hallway done in medieval modern—rugs on the walls, rugs on the floor, burning sconces—the dungeon look. A set of big iron handcuffs even stuck out of the wall. 

I had a bad feeling they weren’t there for to create atmospheric accuracy. 

They led me to a small room. “You-ez stay here, while I take the girl in.” 

Lug blocked Vance, and Weasel led me in. The door shut behind me. Just me and the bad guys. 

I looked around. A man sat on what I can only call a throne, a woman on the floor in front of him in some Princess-Leia-meets-Jabba-the-Hut get-up, chained to his chair. It took me a minute to even recognize it as Mia. 

I gasped. “Mia—” I rushed to cross the room to her. 

“I wouldn’t come closer, human.” I knew that voice. I looked up. The man on the throne was the same man I met outside Red Roof. The mysterious messenger, as I had mentally dubbed him.  

“Yeah, well my mother is always saying I lack good decision making skills,” I began.

“You would be wiser to listen, this once,” he put in smoothly. Tan and golden haired as before, his eyes still struck me as oddly familiar. Set far apart on his face and the wrong shape but…nope, still didn’t place him. I had a feeling he wasn’t altogether paying attention to what was going on in this room. Maybe he was doing something mystical, like looking through the eyes of his lackie in the hall…maybe he was mentally organizing his sock drawer. Either way, I had only a small portion of his attention. 

“Yeah, but I am here with the brother of the guy who runs this place, and that is my best friend you got on a leash.”

“I know, and I tried to tell you to leave it go, but you didn’t listen, did you?”

A scuffle came from the hall, and Weasel crossed the room to leave out another door. My pulse sped, and I thought fast. “Look, at least let me touch her, see that she is okay. What harm can it do?” 

“Fine. I want you closer if Vance comes in anyway.”

I nodded. That made sense. Then, if Vance comes in he can threaten me
and
Mia to subdue Vance. What he didn’t know was that his biggest threat was in the room already. 

Or so I hoped.

I moved to Mia. She looked like someone beat the living hell out of her, but she was alive, un-staked and breathing. I caught Mia’s hands and slipped something into them. “The Odyssey.”  

I knew suddenly how I recognized those eyes.
Vance
. The bad guy had Vance’s eyes, meaning I’d met his brother, Gregorian. I felt betrayed for Vance. I knew Gregorian likely listened to my every word. Here was hoping Mia remembered seventh period English and the story with sirens. 

She nodded and took the earplugs I’d offered her. I slid the backpack full of all her witchy goodies off and toed it at her. Hopefully, she would be able to use them—I’d even packed some sugar.
You never know what a witch can do with a little sugar.
She rolled to her side. I stood and decided to distract Gregorian. “So, you are his brother, right?” 

“Oh, yes.” He looked toward the door. I glanced at Mia, who gave me a thumbs up.

“Do you like music?”

“What are you blathering about?” His tone sounded sharp. 

“I want to sing for you.” I smiled then heard something to my left. Chance entered the room from the opposite hall holding something—I was afraid it was a gun. 

I closed my eyes and began to sing. Instead of opening the fist, I slammed it open. It was more like breaking a balloon. I popped the balloon and let it all out, singing and letting it out.

I opened my eyes and my siren vision was on high. The vampire looked at me like I was the greatest thing ever.
I mean, I am better than Cocoa Pebbles, here.
Mia rummaged in the backpack, and Chance studied me curiously. 

I stopped singing and stared at him, my curiosity distracting me from the goal. In my defense, I’d never seen something like him before.

Regular people showed up in siren vision as bright as candles flickering. Vance, a vampire, and his brother, showed up as bright as florescent bulbs.

Chance was the sun. Chance was a nova. Chance was off the radar and he still looked at me as curiously as I stared at him. 

Unfortunately, though, you should not just stop singing before you actually catch the bad guys. But I did. I stood, gaping stupidly at Chance. 

More goons poured into the room, got one look at Gregorian, and came after me. Of course, I didn’t see that. As mentioned…staring stupidly at Chance. 

Mia saw it though, and screamed, “Firefly and night bird sing, I want to slow down everything!”

And…every…thing…went…very…slow…
I turned my head and it took me, like, two minutes. Vance fell in slow motion through the door as it splintered in slow motion. Shards of wood pierced his skin like broken glass. 

You would think a vampire architect would stay away from wood as a building material, but no.
I opened my mouth to scream. Really slowly. 

Gregorian snapped out of the spell my voice had begun to weave and blinked at me...very slowly.

There were goons behind me and then…

Mia said something that sounded like, “Game on!”

But that couldn’t have been it, right?

Things snapped back into real time. She had given me time to think, so I used my mouth, already hanging partly open, to begin to sing, “
Must be
” was all I got out. 

The goons hit me, and I went flying with “Oof!” as the only sound I could make. Mia raised her hands in the air. “In the night and on the morrow, may you all be filled with sorrow!” She tossed out some dust. 

I wept, my heart broken. I looked over at her from beneath the goon who pinned me, and wept. “Wha-wha- wha-t are you da-da-doing?” 

“Oh, drat,” she muttered digging in the bag. “People think you can just cast spells on command and come up with something. Spells aren’t like that. Usually you plan, and plan—ah, ha!” She pulled something out. Gregorian tried to reach for her as he sobbed. “Moonlit paths and gardens gate, trust it all to the hands of fate!” 

We stopped crying and looked around. I think everyone, good guys and bad, in the room waited for whatever she had done to kick in. “Well, do your thing!” She waved an arm at me. If she hadn’t had two black eyes, I would have given her one. 

I opened my mouth, hoping Vance put in the earplugs in the hall before he got into a brawl. Having no better options, I sang where I’d had left off. 

But you, you’re not allowed. You’re uninvited, an unfortunate slight.

Since I’d already opened the fist, I just sent the fingers whirling out of me like tentacles. Each person it hit reverberated back down the line to me with a slight twang. I pulled on them, ready to draw down in the light, but waiting. My eyes locked with Chance’s. He wasn’t moving, but I didn’t have him. I moved across the room to face him. Vance freed Mia somewhere behind me. Chance backed up—which I assumed must be a sign of retreat, so I continued to advance even as he left the room. Rocks fell.
Why are rocks falling?
 

He tilted his head at me. “You have a lovely voice.” A boulder fell and landed next to my foot, raising a cloud of dust. I was having the
worst
time with rocks today. “I think your voice is bringing down the house. Come with me.” He touched my shoulder. 

Just like that, we were outside, near the car—Scotty had beamed me up. I blinked and fell to my knees. “Where are Vance and Mia?” 

“Oh, I am sure they are on their way here. Not that they’ll make it in time.”

I was weak. I had sung, and I had not fed. I tried to think past the burn of that, while making sense of his words. “What about all of those people, what do you mean not make it in time?”