Odyssey (The Vampire Destiny Series Companion Book 1) (40 page)

Nervously rubbing the toe of her boot against the wood floor, she looked at anything but me.  Her eyes settled on the windows high over my head.

“I can only imagine what you were going through.  I’m so sorry, Stefan.  I just freaked out and I ran,” she mumbled.  “It’s not an excuse.  I was stupid.”

“You ignored my calls and spoke with Anna though,” I reminded her angrily. “After the confrontation with your father today, you run off and I have no idea where to find you.  If I lost you…. fuck!”

I slammed my fist against the arm of the chair and I heard the wood crack under the impact of my hand.  I rose to my full six-foot-four-inch height and crossed the room to loom over her.  I glared down at her, and I knew my eyes were filled with agony.

“Stefan, I’m sorry.  I’m sorry.” Tears spilled over, running down her cheeks and she covered her face with her hands.  Her shoulders shook with the power of her gasping sobs.

“Go to bed, Josephine.  I cannot talk to you anymore about this tonight.”  I turned and walked to the sofa. I stretched across it and my gaze fixed on the windows in front of me.  My body was tense, and I had no emotion but fury coursing through me.

“Stefan,” she began.

“No! I said go to bed.  Nothing good will come from our discussion tonight.  There are some things that are better left unsaid.”  I didn’t look at her and my sharp words were harsh.

She dashed down the hallway into our bedroom.  I heard her boots hit the floor and the rustle of her clothing. Finally, I listened to the slight squeak of the bed as she settled beneath the covers.

As much as I wanted to comfort her, I had nothing to offer her but my anger and pain.

***

The sun was rising when she awoke.  Flipping over on her back, she gasped when she saw me sitting on the side of the bed, leaning forward with my head in my hands.  I had not slept and my clothes were wrinkled and my eyes bleary.

“Hey,” she whispered.  I glanced up at the sound of her voice.  Her hands opened and closed impatiently, as if she wanted to reach out and touch me.  Yet she made no offering to move.

“Hey,” I repeated.  My deep voice was husky and weary.  I rubbed my hand across my face and shifted on the bed.

“Stefan, I shouldn’t have run last night.  I should have talked to you.  I freaked out and didn’t think.”  She plucked at the comforter with her restless fingers.  Glancing up at me, she reached out and covered my hand with hers.  “I’m sorry.  If I could go back and do it over again, I would.  I’ll never run from you again.”

She spoke honestly, and I wanted nothing more than to believe her impassioned words.  I squeezed her hand and pulled it from her grasp, carefully tracing over the crude etchings on the pendant around her neck.  “You are still afraid, vackra.”

“Of course I’m afraid.  Everything I thought I knew has been turned upside down.  Not to mention I don’t always handle change well.”  She took my hand again and held it against her chest.  “This is my screwed up mind you’re dealing with.  I’m afraid of losing you, Stefan.  I’m afraid Kian will try to kill me or worse, kill you.”

“I will never leave you, Josephine,” I assured her.  It would take more than Kian Ahearne to finish me…not when I had so much at stake.  “No relationship is perfect and I have told you time and time again that we are in this together.  You cannot just run off and not talk to me.”

“I know.  I guess I needed time to think and I didn’t go about it in the right way.”

“I thought you had left me, Josephine.”  I lay down beside of her with my head on her pillow, our heads touching.  Smiling faintly, my fingertips lightly stroked her cheek and my eyes swept over her face, as if I were committing it to memory.

“I wouldn’t leave you, Stefan.  I just needed to leave reality for a while.  I had a few cups of espresso at Chelsea Market.”

I snorted, offering her a weak smile.  Other humans would be drinking away their troubles in booze.  Not Josephine.  She always managed to do the unexpected. “You were in a coffee shop in Chelsea?  You drowned your sorrows in overpriced tiny cups of coffee?”

She nodded and huddled against my chest.  Her blinding heat and softness was now gone.  She was exactly the same temperature as me, her flesh warm and firm.  Even her blood, while still alluring, no longer made my throat burn.  Part of me missed the more human part of her, while the other rejoiced in the knowledge she was changing and not as breakable.

“You befuddle me, Josephine,” I sighed softly.  “No more running from me.  You not only ran from Kian, vackra.  You ran from what we have.”  I gestured between us, raising my eyebrows sternly.

“No more running,” she agreed vehemently.  Her arms tightened around me as if I was going to leave her.

As if I could do such a thing.  I loved this creature more than my own existence.

I nodded and finally, my arms embraced her, overwhelming myself with the ferociousness of my emotions.  When I was with her like this, it was simple.  It was like coming home, erasing all of my doubts and quieting the voices in my head.  Once I let her go, the fear and confusion would creep back in and my thoughts would turn chaotic and conflicted.

“I spent the night staring out the windows, reflecting back over the last few weeks.  I wondered if I made the right choice in finding you and exposing you to this life.  I feel as if you never truly heard all the things I said to you,” I said impassively against the soft silk of her hair.  “And not with your ears, with your heart.  Perhaps I have not told you what you needed to hear.”

“Stefan...”

“Let me finish,” I continued quietly.  “Yet I am a selfish being.  I realized that I would have continued to search for you regardless.  I was on a mission to find you, the only thing I’ve known for two centuries.  There will never be another for me except you.  However, I will let you go.  I love for the first time in my long life, and I will not force you to give up whom and what you are because I think I know what is best for you.”

Craning her neck, it seemed she was regarding me in a new light and with different eyes.  It was impossible not to sneak into her mind to read her thoughts. She was amazed that I loved her enough to let her go and she was mentally berating herself for her actions.

Josephine had no idea of my inner doubts, my foolish concerns and insecurities.  She had no idea when she ran from me last night; she had confirmed my deepest fear.  She had left me.

Neither of us knew anything about love and relationships.  We were both stumbling along, hopelessly in love but completely clueless.

“I’m going to talk now.”  She pushed my back against the bed and climbed to straddle his hips.  Watching her with cautious eyes, her fingers began methodically unbuttoning my shirt and once it was open, she met my gaze with her bottomless green irises. “I love you, Stefan.  The best night of my life happened the moment you walked into it.”  She leaned over me, pressing her breasts against my bare chest, fisting her hands into my thick, messy hair.  “I was foolish because I ran from you last night and I won’t ever make that mistake again.  I’m not giving you up.  You were reborn for me.”

A sharp gasp left my lips.  I flipped her to her back before she could blink and was standing at the foot of the bed.  I tossed my shirt to the floor and my jeans were off in a blur of movement, lowering to my knees on the bed at her feet, staring down at the cover.

Her words…her heartfelt words were as sharp as any dagger and pierced my very soul. 

“Stefan?”

My head lifted and I was still struck speechless.  She had stripped me bare and all I could do was stare at her with wide eyes, shocked at her admission.

Slowly crawling to meet me, she sat in front of me, reaching out to carefully run her hands over my chest, her fingers caressing my nipples and stroking over the rippled muscles of my abdomen.  With every gentle touch, my body jerked from the pure ecstasy and electricity of our connection.  I swallowed roughly and the corner of my mouth twitched.

“Josephine,” I whispered harshly, swallowing back my pride.  “You were made for me.”

Her hands froze in place, as if afraid to move.  She glanced up at me through her eyelashes. 

I had not budged an inch; I was simply watching her and waiting for her next move.

She shook her head.  “No.”  Her hands were still, waiting for my permission to continue.  “You were saved for me.”

Her words stabbed away another layer of my defenses and I willingly gave into defeat.  “Touch me.  Please.” I did not want to beg.  I only wanted her love.  “Please.”

Hesitantly, she continued her exploration over my skin, letting her mouth follow the path her hands had made.  Her lips and tongue skimmed over my stomach, back up to the broad expanse of my chest.  She traced around each of my nipples with her fingers, rubbing her mouth over the skin of my neck, feeling the muscles in my throat constrict under her lips.

She inched closer to me until our lips were almost touching.  My mouth was curved in a small smile, my fangs fully extended.  She took a finger and caressed each one, moving as if to kiss me, but instead her tongue traced each sharp incisor.  My chest grumbled, my eyes becoming unfocused as I rose to my knees.

She scrambled back against the pillows as I rushed to move between her parted legs.  One hand grasped my cock, rubbing it over her wet folds.  The other gripped her waist, drawing her nearer to me.  My body draped over her and I entered her tenderly, causing us both to break into shuddering moans.  My hips pulled back, dropping my head against her shoulder.  Her beautiful body welcomed me, and it was impossible to get close enough to her.  It was not until I was fully sheathed that I felt complete, our bodies perfectly aligning to one another.

“This is right,” I moaned, burying my face in her hair.  “Tell me this is right.”

If she felt a fraction of the absolute gratification that coursed through me, the sweet erotic bliss I was experiencing…she would understand.