Old Town (45 page)

Once again Dr. Lin stood up and the meeting hall went deadly silent. “At the time of ‘Freely Express Views,’ the views I presented to the hospital leaders were too extreme, but in no way was I attacking the party and socialism. Even so, if it is a question of investigating and prosecuting rightists, I should be counted as one of them.”

This was quite unlike last time when “pulling one vine moves the whole mountain.” Now he was standing utterly alone. Pair upon pair of panic-stricken eyes focused on him.
Why should they be so frightened?
He very much doubted that people’s thinking could possibly be all the same. There would always be those who tended to the left and those who tended to the right. It was precisely the left and the right checking and containing each other that things never ended up in too great a deviation either way. He saw the fat nurse, her head buried in her arms.
Surely she must be feeling that her accusations at the earlier meeting had been too extreme, so why doesn’t she stand up and big-heartedly recognize her mistake?

When the doctor admitted he was a rightist, he felt a great sense of relief and after the meeting he went home in exceedingly good spirits. Along the way he bought peanuts and some of Old Town’s aged rice wine. It had been several months since he and Second Sister had sipped wine under the lantern. Today he finally felt unburdened of all he had been carrying since “Freely Express Views.” He wanted to invite Second Sister to enjoy some wine and have a chat.

Day by day, the big character posters in the hospital grew in number. This new “rightist” designation steadily grew into something quite terrifying. You could almost say it in the same breath as “counterrevolutionary.” Every day, Dr. Lin went around the outer wall of the hospital reading a string of big character posters. There in black ink on white paper was his name and the names of many others. Many people attacked each other as rightists.

What is going on here?
Dr. Lin just couldn’t figure it out.

On this month’s payday, Dr. Lin was called to the personnel section where the section head gave him three months’ salary and said, “The leadership of the health bureau is of the view that your work level does not reach that required in state hospitals. In accordance with the spirit of higher authority, we suggest that you take the initiative of resigning.”

The doctor was at a total loss as he stood in front of the desk in the section head’s office. When he had first received the employment letter he thought someone was playing a joke on him. Today he was being forced to quit and this also seemed like a joke. He had a vague sense that a pair of hands behind him was manipulating the ups and downs of his destiny.
Who could that person be?
Suddenly he laughed, “All right, all right. Good-bye.”

He was still wearing his white smock as he left the personnel section office, and gripping the three months’ salary, he walked straight out of the hospital. People at the gate greeted him, but he heard nothing and saw nothing. Despondently he implored Jesus.
O Lord, I truly am all confused. Why should people play such practical jokes on me? How will I ever explain this to Second Sister? She is so concerned about my work. I don’t blame her. She’s had a lifetime of the upheavals I have been entangled in. Before, I thought that when we got old I could finally give her “a high pillow” and a life free from care, but I am truly an incompetent man. O Lord, I beseech you to comfort Second Sister, and keep her from being too worried.

The doctor looked up and discovered that he had now walked all the way to West Street. Half a century before, that was Mr. Qiao’s residence right there in front of him. A wave of warmth swept through him and a feeling of gratitude like a sunbeam swept away the gloom of his bad feelings.
What do I amount to? When I was eight years old I should have died like a wild dog by the roadside. But I survived, had a family, built up a practice…my wife and children are perfect, so what does a tiny setback count for?

He kept pinching the wad of paper currency he held in his pocket. Feeling much better now, he wanted to go home and play a joke on Second Sister. He would tell her that higher authorities had especially commended him and tripled his salary. The sight of Second Sister squinting as she counted the money would be just so adorable.

At the West Gate street crossing, the doctor stopped to take a look. There was no sign of Second Sister under the oleander tree. He supposed she had gone back to the kitchen to fill the rice bowl and bring out the food.

“Second Sister!” As he passed through the door he stopped in midstride. Second Sister, together with Baosheng and Baoqing, were sitting together at the Eight Immortals table, looking very stiff and formal.

Don’t tell me they already know that I’ve lost our rice bowl…

“What brings you back here together?”

“Dad, Baoqing and I would like to have a word with you,” Baosheng said.

Surprised at this, the doctor asked, “About?”

Second Sister stood up and interrupted them. “First, let’s eat. Afterward, then you can talk.”

“You sit down. I want to hear what they have to talk about!”

Although his two sons had already married and had families of their own, they still felt respect and awe toward their father. They looked at each other, and Baoqing said, “Bro, you just go ahead and say it.”

Baosheng cleared his throat. “Umm, let me put it this way. Baoqing’s and my salaries aren’t too bad. We wish you wouldn’t report to work or run the clinic anymore, but just stay at home with your grandchildren. Su’er often gets sick when he’s placed in the child-care center.”

Oh, so that’s it. These two have come at just the right time.

The doctor asked Second Sister, “And what do you say?” Second Sister hemmed and hawed. “I…I would like you to have work, and then retire after a few more years. And with your pension you could stay at home with the grandchildren. But what our sons are saying makes sense. The ‘Oppose Rightists’ movement’s under way now and you’re too frank and outspoken. Don’t call some disaster upon yourself in your old age.”

“What’s ‘Oppose Rightists’ got to do with it? China, with its hundreds of millions of people, can’t be all leftist, so I’m an ideologically conservative rightist.”

Baosheng exclaimed in fright, “Dad, whatever you do, don’t talk such nonsense!”

Baosheng looked down and paused for a moment, then with a grim expression on his face said, “Dad, just come back home, all right? For me and Baoqing. We guarantee that you and Ma will never worry about food or clothing.”

That morning, Baosheng had met his old boss, Deputy District Head Bai, and found out that the hospital had a big character poster calling Dr. Lin its number one rightist. His old boss said to him in a flat tone of voice, “Persuade your father to resign and just go back home.” Baosheng knew well just how much weight these words carried. His father’s historical problems made his own promotion fail just when it was on the point of success. When Baoqing returned from Korea and was about to report to the military academy, he received his demobilization notice. If their daddy had one more charge against him, his sons and grandchildren would probably all be dragged into this.

The doctor felt his two sons were too chickenhearted and this disappointed him greatly. He spoke with studied reserve. “All right then, both of you go back home. I’ll talk this over with your ma.”

“Dinner is ready. Eat first and then go,” Second Sister said.

“Let them go back to their own homes to eat!”

The two brothers looked at each other in stunned amazement and didn’t know what to do.

Baosheng stood up. “Dad, we’re doing this for your own good.”

“Just go and leave me in quiet for a while.”

Their sons left. Husband and wife ate without saying a word to each other. Then Second Sister cautiously put in, “Actually, you are a doctor. In the hospital just go ahead and take care of sick people. Why get involved in this rightist-leftist business?”

Then she noticed that Ninth Brother was still wearing his white smock. “How is it you’ve come home wearing your work clothes?”

The doctor removed the garment and took out the salary from his pocket. Then he played his joke on Second Sister. “I got a raise this month.”

She counted the money. “How come it’s this much?”

“That’s right! And you still want me to quit?”

Second Sister thought this over for quite a while, the money in her hand. “Peace and security are the most important things. Our sons work in the government and know a lot more than we do. ‘Wind doesn’t just blow out of a hollow rock’…”

The doctor suddenly got all worked up. “I’m sorry, Second Sister. I’m always getting you involved. You’ve eaten so much bitterness in this life with me, and now that we’re old, there’s still no peace. Have you ever regretted marrying me?”

“What’s the matter with you today?”

“Really, tell me, have you ever regretted this?”

“Yes, extremely. What about you? Have you regretted marrying me?”

“
Mmh,
yes, I have.”

They both looked at each other and smiled.

The doctor said, “Heat up some wine. Tomorrow I won’t be going to work. Let’s drink a little more and talk a little more.”

“You’ve decided, then?”

Two cups, then three cups of wine, warmed their stomachs. The doctor told Second Sister all about his resignation. The two of them pondered late into the night and still couldn’t make any sense of the sequence of all these events that had come so quickly, one after the other.

3.

S
U’ER WAS JUST
the kind of big-headed, big-eyed boy that everyone loved at first sight. Every day he would run about under the knees of his Granny and Gramps wearing his split-seat trousers and chirping endlessly, like a little talking magpie. Since coming into the West Gate home, he became the focus of Dr. and Mrs. Lin’s love. A dense and enveloping family joy shut Dr. Lin off from the outside world. And at that moment, the outside world was all stirred up. Throughout the entire country, half a million people were designated as rightist elements. The provincial newspapers had just published this terrifying number.

At ten o’clock in the morning, the postman handed the newspaper to Second Sister. Glancing back, she saw Ninth Brother with their little grandson planting flowers in the sky well. Su’er was playing in the dirt with a spoon. She wanted to go over and stop him but she was moved by this scene of love between grandfather and grandchild. Hazily she recalled Baosheng and Baoqing when they were both very little. Then they had experienced more than enough of the chaos and dislocations of war and only rarely this kind of happy time.

It was now several months since Ninth Brother had resigned from the hospital. Second Sister, as always, held daily meetings in her capacity as director. She was all the more aware of how perilous a calamity their family had avoided, otherwise today Ninth Brother would be “Wearing the Rightist Hat.” Perhaps he might even be sent to some distant and isolated mountain district for labor reform.
O heaven!
She shuddered to think of it. Peace and security were blessings. No amount of money could buy the happy scene of children or grandchildren playing at one’s feet.

She placed the newspaper on Ninth Brother’s desk and, remembering that she should renew its subscription for the next quarter, rushed into the sky well and said, “Gramps! Don’t forget to go to the post office to renew the newspaper subscription.”

After Su’er had come to them, they imitated Su’er’s calling them “Gramps,” and “Granny.”

Ninth Brother kept on busily gardening. “No need to subscribe anymore. Gramps hasn’t been reading it for a long time already. Gramps’ ears aren’t listening to what’s happening outside and all I want to do is play with Su’er.”

“I agree. Since your thinking will never keep up with the revolutionary tide, it would be better not to have any ideology at all.”

“That’s right, the little flowers and plants don’t have ideology. Every day they wear pretty clothes. The birds in the trees don’t have any ideology and every day they sing happy songs. Su’er, is Gramps right?”

“Gramps is right…and Granny’s right too.” Su’er had a nimble mind. He was not yet two years old and he already understood balanced diplomacy.

Ninth Brother laughed. “Su’er is the flower on the top of the wall that bends with each wind. When he grows up, for sure, he can’t be a rightist.”

“Don’t keep going on about rightists and leftists. This is a very serious matter.”

“You’re the one who makes it serious. In our home, you’re the leftist, I’m the rightist, Su’er is the middle-of-the-roader, and we’re still near and dear to each other.”

“Oh, you!” Second Sister shook her head and changed the subject. “How could you have given Su’er the spoon to play with?”

She somehow felt that, inside, Ninth Brother was very clear about everything and only pretended to be all muddled up as his way of escaping reality. In this she sensed great danger. She worried that he might boldly and self-righteously go to the government and announce that he was a rightist. Sometimes at meetings she heard air raid alarms going off inside her and was terrified that he was stirring up some calamity at home.

Taking the sewing basket, Second Sister sat down at the Eight Immortals table to make a little stomach bib for Su’er. As she sewed she pondered over whether or not she should come out straight about all this with Ninth Brother. She recalled that Pastor Chen had said that Christians had to submit to authority. Rightist elements did not submit to the government and so they had to be punished.

“Gramps, you can’t keep saying you’re a rightist. Submission to the government is the lot of Christians. If the government says rightists are bad people, then they’re bad people.”

Ninth Brother turned and gazed at Second Sister. He had something to say but he didn’t say it, just silently lowered his head and went on gardening.

Second Sister saw that he had heard full well what she had said and the alarm abruptly stopped ringing inside her.

That afternoon, Second Sister went to a meeting at the neighborhood office and Ninth Brother took Su’er to soak in the hot springs. The hot springs of Old Town’s eastern district were renowned. It was said that they could cure more than ten kinds of disease. Leading Su’er by the hand, husband and wife walked to Little West Lake before going their separate ways. The weather was pleasant and they were all in a good mood.

Grandfather and grandson passed by a little sundries shop and Su’er saw fruit drops in the glass counter. His eyes homed in on them and he swallowed several times. “Gramps, what are those?”

Ninth Brother gazed at his grandson in wonder.
Every day new continents can be discovered on this little guy. See how cunning he is? He wants to eat candy but doesn’t come right out and say it
. He purposely teased Su’er. “That’s medicine for curing coughs.”

Su’er immediately started to cough. “I want to take medicine.” Ninth Brother couldn’t help letting out a great guffaw. He reached down and fished out some paper currency to buy some candies which he placed in the child’s pocket. Just then, a person called out, “Dr. Lin!”

Reflexively he turned around to look but it took a while before he recognized the woman with the frenzied and grief-ridden face as that fat nurse at the People’s Hospital. In over half a year since he had last seen her she had lost a great deal of weight.

“Dr. Lin, how so very carefree you look taking your grandson out for a stroll.”

“What’s the matter with you? Have you become ill?”

“I’ve suffered a lot because of you!”

The nurse wept silently. With trembling shoulders, she whimpered about the tragedies that had befallen her. She had become the hospital’s top rightist, her husband divorced her, and with a child only five years old, she had been assigned to work in some outlying rural hospital.

The day was still clear and fine but Dr. Lin seemed to be struck by a bolt of lightning. Unable to express himself, he just kept saying, “I’m sorry.”

“What’s the use of ‘I’m sorry’? You’re the real Big Rightist!” she screamed hysterically.

“Yes, yes. If there’s any number-one rightist at all at the hospital, it should be me. I’ll go there and tell the leader.”

The doctor had no sooner said this than he was off, even forgetting to take his little grandson with him. Luckily, Su’er was a sharp lad, and letting out a bellow he ran to catch up. With Su’er in his arms, Dr. Lin went into the leader’s office. The former head of the hospital had been transferred and his replacement called in a clerk to record what was said. “The nurse is still young,” the doctor said, “I hope the leader can give her the chance to correct herself. If the hospital hasn’t met its quota of rightists, then count me as one of them.” The head of the hospital conscientiously took notes and asked him to return home and wait to be dealt with.

That evening when Su’er had fallen asleep, Ninth Brother told Second Sister all that had happened that afternoon. She stopped her sewing and raised both her hands high above her, holding them there for some time. Just today the alarm had been lifted from within her and now the bomb fell right on top of her. What more could be said? This fish that had escaped the net swam right onto the chopping board and asked to be cut up. She supposed that he was a dead man for sure.

His eyes tightly closed, Ninth Brother sat behind Second Sister in his rocking chair. Baoqing had given him this for his most recent birthday. Every day at noon he would doze off, holding Su’er as he sat in the chair. It gave him a feeling of satisfaction impossible to put into words. Thinking that he might no longer be able to hold Su’er as they rocked back and forth in the chair, grandfather and grandson daydreaming together, Ninth Brother grew tremendously afraid. He really wasn’t a desperate and daring man, but every time he encountered some major issue, he would sense a force sweeping him along into making some extraordinary decision. It was as if he had received an irresistible order:
You must do this
.

He opened his eyes and sorrowfully addressed Second Sister, “Let’s say a prayer together.”

Second Sister, wordlessly and devoid of any expression, went into the bedroom and dug out some silk wadding and cloth and spread it out on the dining table. Her skilled hands then dexterously cut out padded jacket and padded trouser patterns for Ninth Brother. She had heard that Old Town’s rightist elements were all sent to mountainous areas for labor reform. Since it had come to this, she had to plan for the worst and she hurriedly made several sets of warm clothing for him.

“Second Sister, this isn’t something I want either. If you don’t forgive me, I’ll feel even more miserable.”

C
rick, crick, crick
went the scissors. When Ninth Brother’s padded jacket and trousers were done, she still had to make some for herself. She had steeled herself. No matter where Ninth Brother might be assigned, she would follow him, even to the ends of the earth. Residence committee director, glorious army dependent, all the honors that she had cared about she now tossed aside. Suddenly she felt her heart grow lighter. Actually, the terror and panic that people feel in confronting disaster more often than not is even more painful than actually going forward to endure the disaster. She had always been in a state of fear that the sword hanging over her head might fall. Now the very moment she relaxed her vigilance, the sword had fallen, catching her totally unprepared. All she could do was wait to be butchered. She’d take things as they came. After all, Second Sister was a woman who had weathered great storms before.

Ninth Brother stared intently at his wife. Finally, the shame and panic in his eyes moved her and called up her mother’s tenderness. She put down her needle and turned to comfort him. “Don’t think about it too much. It’s just fate, your fate and mine too. We’d like to avoid it, but we can’t.”

Ninth Brother wanted to say something, but the corners of his mouth started to twitch and suddenly he was crying like a child.

They didn’t tell their children of the dreaded event that might occur in the family. They treasured every day, every hour they had before that event happened. Second Sister requested sick leave and didn’t participate in any more meetings. The two old folks brought Su’er all over Old Town, wherever there was a place for him to play, and they ate all over Old Town, wherever there was a place to eat. It was just at that time that Grandpa bought a 120 mm camera. Everywhere they went they took souvenir photos of the images of the family happiness shared by grandparents and grandson. Many pictures were candid snapshots that recorded Su’er’s every expression, and these were extremely vivid. My grandfather had the pictures developed and inserted into photo albums. He was preparing this to console his moments of wistfulness and longing after he and Su’er were parted.

One month, two months, passed by. “Oppose Rightists” gradually became a term of the past. The reason was unclear, but the hospital leadership once again released the big fish that had thrown itself into the net. Grandma recommenced her committee work and was so busy going in and coming out of meetings that she was gone from sight the whole day long. My grandfather often held Su’er in his arms as he sat in the rocking chair late at night waiting for “the director’s” return. Sometimes he would tease and joke with her. “If another “Oppose Rightists” movement starts up again, I would still throw myself into the net. In that way, every day you would keep me and Su’er company.” To which, Grandma had this reply: “You’re the fish that swims right onto the chopping board and asks to be cut up. The government has let you go. No matter how much work I do, I could never repay this immense favor.”