On 4/19 (On 4/19 and Beyond 4/20) (43 page)

Chelsea leaned her forehead against his and sighed. He was still kneeling before her and seemed to be making no move to get up. Gently, she cradled his face in her hands. He’d come for her after all. Just as she felt God assure her, he was hers, and she’d been safe in loving him all along the winding journey. Realizing she hadn’t told him so, she said, “I love you.” Closing her eyes momentarily, she whispered, “I was lost without you.”

Pulling her back into him, he assured her, “I’ve found you again. It’s okay now. I’m not going anywhere.” Chuckling, he promised, “And you can be sure I’m not letting you go again.”

Before long they made their way back to Chelsea’s house. Once there, John walked through the front door and immediately let out a long sigh. He was at her house once just before she graduated and had been in every room, making sure it was perfect for her. While most of the house was the same, he could see personal touches were added here and there. It felt like home to him. As much as he tried to recreate the same feeling at the condo, it was never the same as when she was there. After the renovation of her house, he kept her piano but sent everything else to her, with the addition of a new piano. It was the one thing he couldn’t bring himself to part with. Once the condo was empty, he had the same decorator replace everything as best she could to look just as is had when Chelsea lived there. Here in her new house though, he was reminded of what he learned early on. It was never the presence of her things that made him feel at home. It was her presence. Even in the first moments of being there in her house, he felt he belonged. He was home. When he
told her dad that he would not take her away, he meant it. Without looking back, he would move there to be with Chelsea. L.A. meant nothing to him without her.

For the remainder of the night, they sat together on the sofa holding each other, kissing, and planning their new life together. Setting a date for their wedding was easy; they decided on April 19
^th
. It would be the second anniversary of when they signed the contract and the first anniversary of when they separated. No other date seemed as fitting. And even though Chelsea insisted a wedding would take much longer to plan than three months, John would not hear of waiting any longer than that. His reasoning was that he’d waited long enough and that no matter the cost of organizing a wedding in under three months, that was all the time she had. Eagerly, Chelsea agreed.

John tried to tell her about his past few months and how much the Lord was doing inside of him. While he never felt as if he did the story justice, when he told her his mother said she would vouch for him, Chelsea smiled broadly, saying, “I will take her word any day.”

During the course of the evening, John told her about Tuck’s visit. Chelsea realized how remarkable an act that was on his part. Certainly Tuck loved her still, and his actions proved how selflessly. For a moment, her heart ached for him as she recalled their last conversation in her kitchen the morning he showed up unannounced. She was on the verge of giving up on John and told Tuck so. There was something in his eyes when he responded, an unusual sadness. She knew then that the love she felt for John was exactly what Tuck felt for her, a love so strong that waiting was the only option. For Tuck to travel to see John, it was his own way of saying he finally gave up. For them both, it was a final conclusion to their love story of so many years past. In a way, it made her sad, too. At one point, their lives held so much promise.

Chelsea explained to John the relationship she’d developed with Lucy and was clear on the fact that she wanted to remain in her life. Lucy had been the one bright spot over the past months, and simply because John was back in the picture didn’t mean there was no longer a place for her. Smiling at the thought of it, Chelsea could only wonder what Lucy would say when she met John. With the way she expressed her feelings,
even though she thought she was being considerate, Lucy would likely insult him. Rather than prepare John for it, Chelsea decided to wait to see what she might say. Knowing Lucy, it would be something that would cause her to roar with laughter and certainly leave John speechless.

Though she hardly believed him, John told Chelsea about his semi-retirement and the fact that he wanted to live there with her. He and Mark had come to a comfortable working agreement, one which gave John the lesser of the burden of travel and daily administration, but still a voice in the major decisions of the company. Also, because it was something that intrigued him and something that didn’t require a significant amount of his time, he kept his board position at the firm in New York. Their time together in New York held fond memories for him, and he anticipated they could travel there on occasion and catch a show. Because of that, he kept the apartment there when he began to sell off most of his other homes.

It was when John told her about visiting her dad to ask for his advice that she suggested they go to see her parents. Up until then, in the back of her mind, she’d dreaded telling her family. Since they had walked with her through so much hurt and depression over the past few months, she feared they would hold it against John. Knowing John had asked her father first was rather shocking but something that caused her to admire him more than ever. That couldn’t have been an easy thing to do. No telling her father’s response originally, but clearly he gave his consent or else John wouldn’t have contacted her otherwise. She couldn’t help but wonder if her father mentioned him paying off the loan against the farm. If he did, she would be surprised. He was an awfully proud man.

Not exactly ready for the whole family thing, John suggested, “We’ll go in the morning.” Kissing her softly, he admitted, “Tonight, I want you all to myself. Tomorrow, we’ll pack your things and you can stay there while we plan the wedding. I’ll stay here at home.”

“At home, huh? I like the sound of that.”

“Me too.” Pulling her nearer, John felt tremendous relief. With Chelsea in his arms, nothing beyond that mattered to him. He realized for the first time, since he arrived in Oklahoma, he hadn’t once thought of work or chasing the deal. Often he wondered if a man could truly
become so new that he actually forgot to be himself. At some point, he needed to check in, but for the life of him, he didn’t care when. Who is that man?

Late into the night, they lay on the sofa together, Chelsea sleeping, John praying. As she slept, she looked even younger than she actually was. It caused him to worry about her future. Prayer was the only thing that brought him peace about it. Neither of them was promised years to come, so worrying about her life without him was pointless. After what happened with Tracy, he realized the same could happen to Chelsea. That thought caused him to hold on to her a little tighter, his heart thudding painfully at the prospect of ever having to let her go again. Refusing to allow such a train of thought to continue, he instead thought of her final words before she drifted off to sleep. She promised, “No matter what, I’ll always love you.” He believed that with all his heart.

As many women as had chased him over the years, as many as he kept at arm’s length, Chelsea was the only one to never pursue him. From the very beginning, it was he who pursued her. Never had he had the desire to please anyone the way he did her. How many nights had he lain awake and thought of ways to make her smile or to give her all the things she never asked for. From researching the safest car to locating a three million dollar condo blocks away from him, he was infatuated with her all along. At the time, he convinced himself it was to help her have the best life possible while she was with him, but in hindsight, he realized that he was in hot pursuit of her heart all along. Nothing was enough for her, in his estimation, and when he discovered she wanted so little, that caused him to want to give her more. All the while, all she ever did want was him. No one had ever simply wanted him and nothing more. Always there was a hidden agenda. Not so with Chelsea.

It was after two a.m. when she stirred enough that he knew she was awake. With hardly enough room for them both, he suggested, “Go to bed. I’ll be fine here.”

Rolling toward him, she buried her face in his chest. “You couldn’t pay me enough to leave this sofa.” She breathed in deeply, drawing in the scent of his aftershave, and filled anew with him, she easily fell back to sleep in his arms, listening to the sound of his beating heart.

Stroking her hair, he sighed, “That’s my girl.”

Early the next morning, Chelsea and John rode out to her parents’ farm. They had breakfast with her parents and Preston. Immediately after breakfast, the Whittaker home became wedding central. Soon, Caitlin arrived with the kids and then Macy with hers. John, hoping to get out of the way, took Preston out to the airfield with the intention of taking him up for a flight. Once the wedding plans commenced, he wasn’t quite so certain he would be missed. By the fifth time Chelsea texted him, though, he knew his absence was felt. Not one time did she have a wedding question. Each time she simply gave him a current best and worst. One said, Best:
planning a wedding
, Worst:
waiting for the day
. Another said, Best:
you
, Worst:
today - nothing
.

John smiled at the last one, Best:
deciding to wait
, Worst:
three months to go
. Without having to ask, he knew what she meant. They talked about their wedding night the evening before. Even the thought of it caused his heart to race and his breathing to become shallow. He’d once told her whomever she married would get a tremendous gift. Ultimately, he would be that man. All the years she waited, she was always waiting for him. That thought was so tremendously humbling, especially after his past with women, he knew he could never deserve such a gift. For the remainder of their lives together, he would make sure God never regretted extending him such grace and giving him a chance at a new life with Chelsea.

Chelsea sat at the kitchen table with her mother, Caitlin, and Macy. The current topic was colors and Chelsea found she couldn’t care less. Maybe when she was dating Tuck she thought of a wedding, but that dream had long since passed. For as long as she’d been in love with John, she had never even dared to dream of planning a wedding. So there she was, her wedding three months away, and all she could think of was him, not colors or fabrics or food.

“Chelsea.” Gail was finding Chelsea’s lack of involvement frustrating. “We can’t plan this without you.”

Looking up from John’s latest text, she wondered aloud, “Why not?”

Gail, Caitlin, and Macy all stared at her blankly. Finally, Caitlin asked, “Yeah, why not?”

From there, it was decided that Chelsea trusted them completely with the remaining decisions. She had very few requests. For one, they would all fly to Atlanta to find a dress, which was John’s idea. Next, she loved white, white flowers and tulle and fabrics. The food mattered little to her. They could invite anyone they chose along with whomever John wanted to invite. Caitlin, Lexie, Lucy, and Macy would all be bridesmaids. Other than that, the wedding was up to them. When they asked for a budget, she grinned. As John had said the night before, she repeated, “No budget.”

Chelsea waited on the porch for John to come back for her, certain the women inside never missed her input. From the moment she said no budget, they all went wild. Chelsea heard words like buttercream, groom’s cake, and venue, but immediately, her mind drifted back to her groom. Standing there on the porch, she decided that from that moment forward, unless it was absolutely necessary, she never wanted to be away from him again. They would squeeze the fullest life into the time they had before them. So whether it be ten years or thirty, she wanted every moment to matter. One thing was for sure, planning a wedding was not where she wanted to spend her time. Instead, she wanted to simply show up and marry her groom.

Smiling, she thought of dress shopping. John would go with her, he said, but he didn’t want to see the dress she chose. As she recuperated after the accident, they watched dozens of episodes of
Say Yes to the Dress
together. Surprisingly, she found him to be very opinionated as one woman after another tried on dresses. He, like her, leaned toward more simple gowns. While they watched, often she felt a sense of longing that she tried to ignore. Many times she wished she would someday try on dresses, knowing he would be her groom. At the time, it seemed to be an impossibility. What she ultimately discovered, though, was that nothing is impossible with God.

C
helsea watched as Lucy made her way down the sidewalk of the school toward her. Several days each week, Lucy came to her house instead of going directly home. They spent the afternoon going over Lucy’s homework, baking, or playing the piano. Usually, Tuck came around to get her before dinnertime. In the past few days, however, she’d seen nothing of Tuck. When he arrived to pick Lucy up, he just blew the horn and waved at Chelsea, not getting out of the truck. Once John told her of Tuck’s trip to L.A., she presumed he made himself scarce in anticipation of John’s arrival. Considering how he felt about her, for his sake, she was still terribly sad. Knowing that what you want most is out of reach is one of the worst states of being. If anyone knew that feeling, she did.