On Paper (26 page)

TODAY HAD BEEN
different. I'm not sure what I had expected when I’d shown up at Quinn's apartment, I hadn't really given it much thought at all. I just knew that I had to see her, had to hear her voice, had to feel her skin. She was like a drug that I'd been craving for weeks and my only thought had been to get to her.

But then something surprising started happening. It wasn't just that I needed to have her in my space again or that I needed to feel her pressed against my body or sighing my name on those perfect lips, it was so much more.

Seeing Quinn with her family and the way she interacted with them and learning the stories about how she'd become the woman that she is, to see where she came from was more than I'd expected. This was the part where I got to start peeling back the layers and seeing inside this girl who had remained such a mystery to me. It's crazy to feel like you really know someone and then to suddenly realize that you only knew a tiny part, that there are so many other nooks and crannies that you've yet to explore. Every person has the big things, the big picture things that everyone gets to see. They are the easy pieces; the top layers that shield you away from the delicate parts. I wanted to dig deeper, peel away each piece until I found the center, the core of what made her Quinn. That was my new craving. I wanted to know her from the inside out, every tiny facet, every flaw that she tried to hide, every memory that shaped her present.

I took her back to the hotel. I didn't want to take the chance that people would be at her apartment. I didn't want to share her with Lily. I'd had to share her all day and while I'd loved every second of it, now I wanted her all to myself.

She took in the room, simple and dim. "You aren't sharing a room with Miles?" she asked.

I shook my head as I crossed the room towards her. "We wanted our own space," I said. Her mouth fell in a silent, “Oh.” I pulled her to me and kissed her nose. "Today was good," I said.

She grinned, "It was."

"I like your parents," I smiled, running a finger across her cheek.

"You won them over. I think they might like you more than they like me at this point," she laughed.

"It happens," I teased. It made her laugh and she shook her head at me. "What about you? Do you still like me?" I asked. She stared up at me with the sweetest eyes, genuine and focused.

"More than ever," she admitted.

I couldn't stop the smile that overtook me. I could try and play it cool with her, but I would fail. And that was okay, because I wanted her to see the real me, the unprotected version. In a way, she'd seen that side all along. She'd never wasted time with the facade. She was only interested in the me that lived beneath.

The room was dark and quiet and something about it charged the air. I watched as Quinn glanced around, her eyes lingering on the king bed. I walked up behind her, slipping my arms around her waist and pulling her back against me.

"It feels really good to hold you," I said, my mouth against her ear. She sighed contented.

"It feels good to be held. I'm glad you don't play by the rules," she said.

I chuckled, "Me too. I was crazy to think I could leave you behind."

She turned to face me, her eyes drifting across my face as if she were trying to memorize it. Her hand reached out and traced fingers across the stubble on my jaw.

"You're here. In my real life." Her voice was soft, almost like she was talking to herself.

"Real life?" I asked.

She smiled and nodded. "I never thought I'd get to have you in real life," she admitted.

"So California was?" I asked, amused.

"Unexpected," she said. "I never thought I'd get to keep you."

"And now?"

"You leave tomorrow," she said quietly.

"Doesn't mean goodbye.”

She smiled, "Do we even know what we are getting ourselves into?"

"Not a clue. But it's going to be one hell of a ride," I said.

Her face lit up, in that way that made my heart feel like it was too big for my chest, "I'm looking forward to it."

I WAS PACING,
watching the numbers on the arrival board click through, watching the escalator for new arrivals.

Waiting.

My stomach was a mess of nerves and excitement. It was silly really. It was just Quinn. It had been three weeks since I’d left her in Kansas City. I'd talked to her every day since then. But shit, I'd missed her. I couldn't wait to grab her up and take her home.

Home. I was taking her home. She was staying in my space, in my world and I got to keep her there for three whole days. Our love affair was measured in moments of time. I looked forward to the day she found a job here and we could take it all for granted. Until then, all I wanted to do was soak up the time I did have and make it count.

Finally, her flight registered as landed and I went from pacing to staring. I knew logically it would still take a long time for her to get off of the plane and down here to baggage claim, but I was anxious. I wanted to wish her into life. It was agony, the waiting.

It seemed to take forever. After countless faces among strangers she finally came into view. That whole thing about your heart skipping? Turns out it's true. Mine missed a full three beats before it remembered to start pumping again. She stood at the top of the escalator searching me out and when our eyes locked she gave me a small wave. The smile broke across my face as I pushed against the traffic to get to her faster. Once she'd cleared the bottom I pulled her to me and wrapped her up in a bear hug.

"You're here," I said as I squeezed. She laughed against my chest.

"Hi," she managed; it came out muffled, probably because I was smothering her. I stepped back to give her some air and so I could take her in. She was beautiful. I'd forgotten how beautiful. It was something memory and photo couldn't capture. There was a glow that could only be fully appreciated in person.

"You're so fucking beautiful, Quinn," I breathed her in, the faint smell of her shampoo waking up my memories. I pulled her close, dipped her back and kissed her. I meant to keep it sweet, but once my lips found hers it ignited the passion and I kissed her deeply. She clung to my neck, holding on as I leaned her back further still, just like in an old Hollywood movie.

When I finally put her back on her feet she stared up at me breathless. I smirked at her, her dreamy expression doing wonders for my ego. "I should let you miss me all the time," she laughed. I pulled her in for another hug, unable to handle any of the distance between us.

"Let's get your stuff," I smiled. I slapped her ass and pushed her towards baggage claim, "I'll take you home and show you exactly how much I missed you. I hope you slept on the plane," I teased.

I PAID THE
delivery guy for dinner and laid it all out on the table. I knew she had to be hungry. I was working hard at being a gentleman by not attacking her the moment we'd entered the apartment. I was showing even more restraint by not following her sexy ass into the shower when she decided she wanted to wash off the travel grime. I'd offered to do it for her, but she'd smiled and told me to wait and order her dinner.

It was fine. I needed her to have enough energy for what I had planned anyway. I wasn't planning on letting her sleep much tonight. I'd waited too damn long to get her back in my arms to waste any part of it.

I heard the bathroom door open and called out that dinner was waiting. When I didn't hear her respond I took a step towards the hallway, stopping short when I saw her.

"Fuck, Quinn, are you trying to kill me?" I growled. She gave me a soft, sexy smile as she posed with one hand on her hip. She was wearing a tiny, black lace cami nightgown that fell just past her hips. I could see straight through it, from the pink bow on her panties to her pebbled pink nipples. My dick was rock hard.

"You like it? I got it just for you," she teased, running one finger across the swell of her cleavage.

"Best fucking present I've ever gotten," I said moving towards her.

"But you haven't even unwrapped it yet," she cooed. She fucking cooed. Like some sex kitten. Who was this girl and how the fuck did I get so lucky?

"Well, shit, baby, I guess we better fix that." I pulled her to me, running my hand along her thigh, her skin was as smooth as silk, and when I brushed her lacy black panties I could already feel how wet she was.

I kissed her slow and deep, slowly moving her backwards until I had her pinned against the wall behind her. Her hands wrapped around the back of my neck, tangling in my hair. But, I was in control, she couldn't go anywhere, she was mine to devour. I traced my tongue across her jaw; I sucked her bottom lip, nipping as I savored each taste.

"I got you dinner. I hope you like cold Thai food because right now I'm taking you to bed."

"That’s my favorite kind," she said. I lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around me, rubbing her hot core against the painful bulge in my jeans. As I carried her into the bedroom she tugged the t-shirt over my head, making me laugh at her awkward struggle.

I set her on the floor and took a step back taking a moment to watch her watching me as I slowly unhooked my belt and slid my jeans over my hips; her gaze never wavering, promising me so many things. When I stood before her in just my boxer briefs she moved to me her hand reaching out stroke my erection. Just that small touch had me aching as I pushed into her hands. Fuck, I needed to be slow with her, savor her, but all I could think about was sliding into her, taking her fast and rough.

"I got you something too," I said, my breath already a little shallow. She quirked up an eyebrow as she continued to stroke me.

"I see that," she teased.

"I'm serious, hold on." I moved away from her, painfully. She protested and it made me smile. "Trust me, baby."

I pulled out the envelope from the bedside table. I had planned on doing this differently, but now I knew I couldn't wait. The need had grown unbearable and it had to be now. I handed her the envelope and she gave me a curious look, confused as to why I was stopping our seduction for this.

"Open it," I said. I kissed her neck and then bent to kiss her stomach as she opened it up. Her eyes scanned the paper and then locked on mine, still not understanding completely. I stood up and leveled my gaze to hers.

"These are my test results. I know I have a past, but I want you to know that you are safe with me. Completely safe. Above everything else I want you to know that.” I saw the smile play at her lips as she looked back down at the paper. I took a deep breath, “There’s more. I know it's presumptuous, but I want to be with you without anything else between us. You said you were on the pill, so, I thought . . ." Doubt filled my voice as I realized just how crazy I sounded. Test or no test she may not want to go bare with me. I'd never done it before. I'd never wanted to. But with her, it was all I could think about, to be inside her, to feel her skin to skin, to empty myself in her and claim her somehow. I knew I sounded like a caveman, but it was something I wanted her to say yes to.

I waited, my heart banging against my chest.

"You did this for me?" she asked softly.

"Yeah. Well, for us, for me," I shrugged.

She turned and put the paper on the nightstand and moved to me. She moved her hands down my chest and then rested them on my hips. Her eyes locked on mine as she began to push my boxer briefs down. Her fingers wrapped around my cock and she began to slide her hand up and down my shaft. It nearly brought me to my knees.

"You know I trust you. I'm yours, completely," she said. I walked her backwards until her knees hit the bed.

She was mine. Those words did a number on me. So simple, but spoken with such commitment that it took me over like a wave. I looked down at her face, my heart clenched tightly at the sight of her. I was falling under her spell more each day.

"You are beautiful." I didn't even recognize my own voice. It was full of emotion and it surprised me, just like it always did. The things that this girl made me feel, the things that she did to my heart--they were consuming. I wanted every part of her. I wanted it and I feared it. It was a constant back and forth, a constant question. Could I do this? Could I fall completely? Go all in? Now that I’d pushed her, convinced her to do this there was a small part of me that worried I was making promises I couldn’t keep.