One Hundred Proposals (17 page)

Harry swallowed. ‘That will be the doctor.’

I nodded, unable to say anything. If the doctor was going to listen to my heart right now, it would sound like hard rain on a tin roof.

‘You look a lot better, actually.’

What did that mean? Was he going to turn the doctor away? ‘I feel a lot better.’

He nodded and I saw his eyes glance down to my lips just for a second before the knocking sounded again.

He turned the shower off and stepped out of my arms. The moment, if indeed there ever had been one, was gone.

He pulled a fluffy towel off the rail and wrapped me in it.

‘I’ll get you some dry clothes and then the doctor can take a look at you.’

I nodded, and the next moment Harry was gone. I heard him talk to the doctor and he briefly returned to the bathroom with a pile of dry clothes and then he left me alone.

What had happened then? Had he been about to kiss me? No, he was just helping me to take a shower. But the way he had looked at me, like a lion about to devour his prey…

I got dressed quickly and walked out into the bedroom. The doctor examined me, felt round my stomach, asked me loads of questions and declared that it was probably just a bug – but I was to drink plenty of fluids, get some rest for the next day or so and that if it got any worse to call him again.

As soon as he left, the atmosphere changed in the room. It lay heavy between us. I sat on the bed watching Harry mess around with his camera, his phone, his clothes, as he deliberately didn’t look at me.

I wanted to ask him whether what I felt in the shower was completely one-sided. These emotions that were flying about, surely he felt them too.

I had to do something to clear the air, even if I was only clearing it for myself.

‘What was the proposal?’

He smiled, and I wasn’t sure if it was out of relief that the tension had been broken, or just because he was keen to show me his latest proposal. He grabbed his camera and plonked himself next to me on the bed, leaning into me so we were touching knee to shoulder, just like he’d done with Barbie back on the boat. I didn’t know whether to be delighted by this intimacy or not. Did he see me the same as the girl he had been flirting with on the boat, a friend? Something more? Why was I reading into everything, why couldn’t I just accept things for how they were? I had the best friend anyone could ever hope for and I should be happy with that, not try to push for more.

He flicked on his camera.

‘A proposal by land, sea and air,’ Harry said.

I watched the video and smiled as first someone rode a bike trailing a banner with the words ‘Marry Me’ along the beach front. Then the camera turned to catch a banana boat, trailing the same banner and finally the camera tilted upwards as a tiny propeller plane, obviously used for promoting bars and clubs, dragged the now familiar words in its wake. Then the camera went black.

The fact that there was no commentary or no huge smile from Harry recorded on film was testament to how angry he was when he had filmed it.

‘It’s lovely. I’m so sorry I missed it.’

He kissed me on the forehead and I knew he didn’t need to hear it. He shuffled back and lay down with me, his arm round my shoulder as my head fell onto his chest.

‘Listen, about yesterday…’

‘It doesn’t matter,’ he said.

‘I didn’t sleep with Elias.’

Though if I had that was the least of my crimes. I’m sure he was more bothered about me getting angry over him simply talking to another woman.

He was silent for a moment. ‘Suzie I saw you, not that it matters of course, we’re both free agents.’

‘I know. But I’m not that woman who would sleep with a complete stranger. Sometimes I wish I was, but I’m not. I don’t know what you saw, you might have seen me and Elias getting naked and jumping in the sea and kissing, and you might have seen him getting a condom out of his shorts – but if you’d hung around a bit longer you also would have seen me telling him I couldn’t do it. I’m never going to see him again and it just didn’t feel right. I kept thinking of you…’

‘Of me?’

I bit my lip, wishing I had some kind of filter on my brain that would stop inappropriate words coming out of my mouth. I was glad that he couldn’t see my face. ‘Just… that it was hypocritical, as you said, to go off with someone I’d just met when I’d shouted at you for the same thing. I’m on holiday with you so…’ I shrugged, hoping he would agree.

‘I’m glad.’

I looked up at him. ‘You are?’

‘Just that the man was a creep.’

I sat up. ‘Harry!’

He closed his fingers over my lips so I couldn’t talk. ‘The ‘my wife died and I’ve never been with another woman since’ story. It’s a crock of shit. He trots that story out to every woman that stays on the boat. Works like a charm. The other crew were telling me. I’m glad you didn’t fall for it too.’

I scowled because I nearly did fall for it. Elias had seemed so nice. It was only because of somehow feeling disloyal to Harry that I hadn’t slept with him.

He sat up. ‘I want you to be with someone special, someone who knows how fantastic you are, someone who would go to the ends of the earth for you.’

‘Someone who would love me despite the cow print onesie?’

‘No, someone who would love you because of it.’

I smiled.

‘I don’t think you should sleep with anyone until you find that person, someone who loves you and would worship you in bed. In fact, don’t sleep with anyone until you’re married, that makes more sense.’

I laughed. ‘Harry, I haven’t slept with anyone for two years, not since Alex. I can’t wait another two years or more until I have sex.’

Good lord. Had the sickness addled my brain? I literally had no filter on my mouth at all.

‘Greasy kebab boy was your last lay?’ Harry seemed delighted by this. ‘What about Tiny Tim? You said the sex was amazing, even the sideways sex.’

I was never going to get away from Tiny Tim, and the lies surrounding him were going to keep coming back and tripping me up.

‘Ok, ok, I lied about me and Tim having sex. We went out on a few dates. He wanted to, he kept pushing me for sex but I just wasn’t ready.’

I looked away and stared at my reflection in the mirror incredulously. Now I sounded frigid. Or that I had some serious issues. This is why lying was bad, I was rubbish at it.

‘Did something happen with Alex?’ Harry’s hand was on my arm. ‘Did he hurt you? Is that why you haven’t been with anyone else since?’

I groaned inwardly. I was actually making it worse.

‘No, Alex was lovely. Very dull, but lovely. I don’t think he would know how to hurt me. No, I’m just rubbish with men, Harry – if they show the slightest flicker of interest I run away embarrassed.’

‘But you went out with Tiny Tim, why didn’t you…?’ I could feel him trying to understand.

How could I explain that there had been no one for me for two years because I had fallen head over heels for him, because no one else ever came close? And how could I explain why I hadn’t had sex with my imaginary boyfriend?

‘It was just, he was very full on. Kept on telling me how he’d like to tie me up and well… Fifty Shades my arse.’

‘Your arse?’

‘Not specifically my arse.’

‘But you loved Fifty Shades, you read the trilogy twice.’

‘Yes. I did.’ I had to remember that Harry had loved that kinky stuff with Sexy Samantha and although I’d never thought about being tied up during sex before, having Harry tie me up and do wicked things to me would be very pleasurable indeed. ‘That kind of sex takes time and trust. I don’t want to have sex with someone for the first time and they whip out a gimp mask and genital clamps.’

Harry visibly paled and quickly crossed his legs, protecting his manhood. ‘Genital clamps?’

I nodded.

‘What were you doing with this guy, he sounds like a right freak.’

‘He seemed nice at first.’

‘All the freaks do.’ He shuddered. ‘That’s decided then. Definitely no sex with anyone until your wedding night. I’m not having you go out with any more freaks.’

‘Harry…’

‘Listen. The right guy for you is just around the corner. I promise.’ He took my hand and trailed his fingers lightly across my palm. Goose bumps exploded treacherously over my body, though he didn’t seem to notice. ‘I can see your future. This line here is your love line. Before the year is out, you will be married to the most marvellous man. He will treat you like a queen and carry you everywhere.’

I shifted closer so I could humour him and look at my palm too. Nothing to do with being closer to him. He smelt amazing, his sweet, spicy, earthy scent.

‘What’s he like?’

‘Tall, dark and handsome.’ He looked closer. ‘And magnificent in bed. No kinky stuff at all.’

‘I don’t mind a bit of kink. With the right man.’

His eyes flicked up to mine again. ‘Just wait, Suzie, you’ll find him soon enough, I’m sure of it.’

I sighed and nodded, just hoping this mystery man would arrive sooner rather than later.

Harry dropped my hand and I sensed the subject was over. ‘Fancy going down the beach for a bit? Fresh air might do you some good.’

I nodded and he was off the bed and away from me a second later.

I just had to fall out of love with him first.

Chapter Ten

I lay on the bed staring at the sky as it turned from blue to candyfloss pink. Cancun was a typical beach paradise with the white sands and turquoise waters – but the cherry on the cake was the four poster beds, with duvets, soft pillows and white chiffon curtains billowing gently in the breeze. We had spent the entire afternoon lying here in sumptuous comfort as lovely bar men brought us drinks and snacks at our every whim. The beach was quiet at this time of year, and with the curtains surrounding us, it helped to close us off from the outside world – making it feel like we were the only ones here.

I had dozed on and off all afternoon, in the heat of the day, recovering from my bout of sickness earlier. Every time I woke, Harry was lying by my side, either reading or answering emails or staring out at the sea or even one time staring at me.

I rolled over now, hugging a pillow as I watched the waves. Harry was out in the sea and I found myself biting the pillow as I watched him swim. Large muscled arms sliced through the waves, droplets of water dripping off his powerful back. He really was a walking cliché – big, beautiful, and rich.

He stood up and started walking towards me, his huge thighs sloshing through the waves. I bit harder on the pillow and I felt sure it would pop in a minute and I’d be left explaining why I was surrounded by a cloud of feathers.

As the last of the sun glistened on his wet body and I imagined drying him off with a towel, or even better my tongue, he stumbled head first into the water. I sat up to see if he was ok, but the laugh was already bubbling up in my throat. He stood back up, clearly embarrassed and to my delight he had seaweed stuck to his head. I snorted and laughed so hard, he clearly heard me from twenty feet away. He stopped and looked in my direction, a scowl marring his beautiful features, though this did nothing to stop my laughter.

He walked into the shallows and it was then I noticed a girl waiting for him – she was about my age, stick thin, long brown hair cascading down her back in beautiful curls. The white bikini she was wearing left very little to the imagination.

‘Are you ok? That was quite the tumble you took there?’ she asked.

Harry approached her, clearly unknowing that the seaweed was still stuck to his head. I couldn’t help but laugh even more as he flashed her his most charming smile.

‘Yes, I’m fine, thank you for asking.’

I noticed that he had seaweed sticking out from the bottom of his shorts too, like he had very dodgy, long green pubic hair. My laughter doubled in volume.

Harry flashed me another look and the girl scowled in my direction too. ‘Some people are so rude, laughing at other people’s misfortunes, you could have been hurt.’ Her hand was on his arm.

‘Yes exactly, so rude,’ agreed Harry. ‘Excuse me.’

He left the girl and came back to the bed. I caught the look in his eyes and I quickly scooted away from him, but he grabbed my ankles and dragged me back across the bed towards him.

‘No, Harry, please, I wasn’t laughing at you, I’m sorry,’ I squealed through my laughter.

He plucked the seaweed off his head, and as he pinned me down he dragged it across my belly – leaving trails of cold water across my skin. I shouted and squealed, trying to get away from him. He picked the other strand from his thigh, then leaned over me and draped it over my face.

‘Harry, no, that’s disgusting,’ I squealed, trying to wriggle away from him.

Through the curtains I saw the girl watching us wistfully as she turned and walked away. I couldn’t help the uncharitable thought from forming in my head, though I had the good grace not to say it.

Jog on, he’s mine.

*

‘Fancy going to watch the wedding?’ Harry asked, his words vibrating through my head as I was propped up against his stomach reading my book. The sun had almost gone in now and in the fading light I was finding it hard to make out the words.

I rolled over to face him and he pointed down the beach. Not far away, people were gathering on golden chairs and candles and flowers lined the aisle up to a flowered archway.

‘We can’t just gate-crash a wedding.’

‘I’m not suggesting we pitch up and sit on one of the chairs, I’m saying we could just, you know, walk past very slowly.’

I looked again and watched as the bride came down through the gardens of our hotel, surrounded by her bridesmaids dressed in the same azure colour as the sea. I nodded keenly. We quickly grabbed our things and then sauntered nonchalantly up the beach.

The bride looked beautiful in a silvery dress that glittered in the candlelight as she approached the back of the aisle. Soft harp music was being played and the guests stood to welcome her down the aisle towards her groom.

The way he looked at her sent shivers down my spine, this was a man in love. He reached out to take her hand and pulled her against his side just like Harry had done to me a hundred times.