Ordinary (Anything But) (15 page)

He tossed a pile of clothes at her. They landed in her lap where she
sat on the bed. “Get dressed.” Honor opened her mouth. Nealon swung around and pierced her with his eyes. “
Now
.”

She stiffened, not liking his demanding tone of voice. “I’m not dressing or undressing with you in the room.”

He muttered something sounding strangely like a swearword and stormed out of the room. “I’ll be waiting outside the door.”

Honor knew enough to realize it was not the time to antagonize Nealon. She grabbed the wadded up clothes that smelled like
him and quickly dressed in the jeans and long-sleeved white tee shirt and socks that all surprisingly fit. But should she really have been surprised? Probably not. Nothing about her life was private anymore.

He entered the room again a
fter a quick knock on the door. “Ready?”

“How did you know—“

“Here. Put these on.” He shoved a pair of tennis shoes at her.

She tugged the white shoes on her feet that, of course, were the right size. “What’s going on?”

Nealon strode down the hallway. She followed. “I’ll explain in the plane.”

That drew her up short. “Excuse me? Did you say plane?”

Nealon backtracked to her, his eyes flashing. He leaned in toward her as he said through gritted teeth, “Move it, Rochester.
I mean it
.”

She did. They practically ran out of the building, drawing the attention of teenagers and agents alike. The air was chilly, even for closer to the middle of May. It was dark and windy
out with clouds taking up the sky. Honor was so glad for outside air she didn’t care what the weather was like. It wasn’t right what they did to them, UDs and UDKs alike, keeping them away from their homes and inside a building for at least a week with no permission to venture outside. Resentment shot through her and Honor had the crazy urge to make a break for it. Her eyes darted around, taking in the black Lexus with a gray-haired man standing beside the driver’s side door, illuminated by a streetlamp. It was just him and Nealon and her.

As though
he was attuned to her every thought, he turned back, steadying his gaze on her.
Don’t
, his eyes warned.

Honor sighed and got into the car. It smelled like the clean smell she associated with Nealon. He got in the backseat as well. The car shrank with him in it. His presence took up the whole backside
of the vehicle and then some. As the car pulled out of the parking lot, Honor asked, “How did you know what I was thinking?”

“I used to be you.”

She frowned, turning to face forward. What did he mean by that? “Where are we going?”

“Owl Mountain, Michigan.”

She had no idea where that was. “Why?”

Nealon tossed a manila envelope at her. “Read up.”

Honor clutched the folder to her chest. “I think you should know…” She swallowed, her body beginning to tremble. “That whole plane thing? It really can’t happen. I’m scared of flying.”

Nealon stared at her, his brown eyes reflecting streetlights as the car drove out of town. “What do you mean?” he asked evenly.

“I…I’ve never flown. I don’t want to. Ever. The thought…it makes me queasy.”

“How queasy?”

“Throw up queasy,” she admitted. “Can’t we just drive there?”

Nealon pressed his head against the back of the seat and closed his eyes. “It will take five hours to drive there. It will take less than one to fly.”

“Five’s not that long.”

Nealon’s head lifted and his eyes snapped open. “The UD you go to school with escaped as he was being transferred to the new facility. He’s considered dangerous. Every minute he isn’t found is one people’s lives are at risk.”

She sucked in a sharp breath, the weight of his words slowly sinking in, chilling her. “Christian?”

The space between them disappeared as Nealon glared into her face. “You need to stop thinking of him as Christian and start thinking of him as a UD. That is all. He can never be more than that to you.
Ever
.” His eyes scanned her face. “Do you understand?”

Honor swallowed and looked at the file in her hands. No, she didn’t understand. She didn’t understand any of it. “Why are you bringing me along?”

“Because I like your company so much.”

“Why?” she insisted.

“The administrators saw on the cameras how he responded to you. They think he’ll listen to you.”

Honor felt sick. “You plan on using me to get to Christian?”

“First off, this goes way beyond me. Secondly, he
isn’t Christian anymore
. Not to you.”

She stared at him. “How do you do that?”

“Do what?” he clipped out.

“Stop caring.
Stop thinking of them as humans. Turn off your emotions. How do you do that?”

“You’ll learn.
In time.”

Honor slapped the file down on the seat between them. “No. I won’t. I won’t ever be like you, Nealon. Not ever.
I don’t
want
to be.” She crossed her arms over her chest and glared out the window. The car sped past country homes, farms, cornfields, and rolling hills; all under the blanket of night. Honor trained her eyes on the smoky clouds, wishing they could form a barrier between her and reality.

He didn’t say anything for a long time, and when
Nealon finally did, his voice was low. “I used to be exactly like you. I didn’t understand why they were kept under observation during the turning. I didn’t understand how they could be locked up against their will, watched for the rest of their UD life. I didn’t understand how the agency could view them as less than humans, closer to animals.” Honor looked at him, intrigued by his words, by the way he spoke. Nealon took a deep breath. “I didn’t understand any of it until I saw what they could do, until I saw with my own eyes the destruction of lives they left behind when something changed with their DNA.” He looked at her. “If Christian didn’t adapt well to the turning, he has to be put down. It’s as simple as that. Before lives are lost.”

“He’s not like that.”

“How well do you know him, really?”

She averted her gaze. Honor didn’t know Christian very well at all. She knew he was quiet, a loner. She knew he liked to write and was good at it. That was about it. Honor looked at her clasped hands. She knew her breath always caught a little when she looked at him.
There was something so noble about him, something that couldn’t be faked; it had to be
real
to be seen. The way he carried himself, the strength in his gaze; Christian was a fighter, like her. He wasn’t one to easily give up. She didn’t want to think of someone like him giving up.

“Serial killers, rapists, murderers…so many of them can be linked to the UD virus. The video you watched of the UD subject; that pales in comparison to what some of the others have done.”

“So we’re supposed to find him, lure him in, and kill him?”

“We know where he is, Rochester. GPS chip.” He tapped behind his left ear. “It may not have to come to his disposal, but we won’t know for sure until we have him locked up again and are able to observe him and run tests.” Nealon met her eyes. “They want you to talk to him, calm him down, get him to come back willingly.”

“Who are
they
?”

His face looked grim in
the dark. Nealon didn’t answer. The car stopped at the small residential airport fifteen miles about outside of Anderson Junction. It was the same airport her father supposedly flew in and out of on a routine basis; it was the one he took off from when his plane crashed. Nealon leaned toward her, forcing Honor to look at him. “You can do this. In fact, I’m pretty sure you can do just about anything if you want it bad enough. I have faith in that, in you.”

“I thought you hated me.”

“I don’t
hate
you. That’s not the problem. The problem is I
can’t
hate you. I don’t have it in me. I look at you and see your bravery and I…I
admire
you. You’re pretty much fearless. Not many people can say that.”

“I’m not fearless,” she whispered. “I’m scared of lots of things.”

“Yes, but you still do them, don’t you? Being fearless isn’t being unafraid; it’s doing things
in spite
of being afraid. You can do this. I know you can.”

Honor’s brows lowered as she searched his eyes to see whether he spoke the truth or not. Nealon didn’t flinch from her gaze, didn’t look away.
She exhaled deeply, nodding. His faith in her gave her faith in herself. Honor didn’t understand why, what it was about him, but she trusted him as much as she could anyone. She realized then that Nealon kept the true part of him hidden.

Another vehicle pulled up as she got out of the car. It was a dark blue SUV. Burns got out of the driver’s side, dressed in a dark suit. He turned to face Honor and smiled, instantly chilling her. Another figure, taller and fitter than Burns, moved around the side of the SUV. It was Ryder.
Her pulse quickened at the sight of him.

“Why are they here?” she asked in a low voice. The wind picked up, blowing her hair around her face. Honor pushed it out of her eyes.

“Protocol. You’ll learn more about that soon enough. Let’s go.” Nealon placed a hand to her back and ushered her toward a small white plane. It didn’t look big enough for the four of them plus a pilot to fit into.

Her palms were wet, her skin clammy. Honor felt hot and her teeth chattered. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t get on that plane. Her feet felt like they weighed one hundred pounds each and every step was hard for her to make. The thought of nothing below her but air was enough
to make her stomach flip-flop. Burns was already in the plane; Ryder was pulling himself into it when she reached it. Nealon looked at her, waiting. He didn’t say anything, but his expression was firm, confident.
You can do this
, it seemed to say.

“What’s the hold up, Rochester? Get in,” Ryder said, leaning halfway out of the plane to better badger her.

She couldn’t move. Honor was dizzy and nauseous. She wanted to run and not for any other reason but to get away from the plane. Planes wrecked. People died when that happened.

“My dad…my dad died in a plane crash,” she whispered. Honor’s whole body was shaking.

Somehow Nealon still heard her. “I know,” was all he said.

She looked up with
eyes stinging with unshed tears.

Nealon moved close to her, his warm body shielding her from Ryder’s and Burns’ eyes. He spoke quietly into her ear, “Fear is a very powerful thing, especially when you let it be. You’re stronger than the fear, Honor. Don’t ever forget that.”

She met his eyes, wondering how he could understand her so well when he barely knew her. Honor remembered his earlier words of being like her. Maybe that was how. She swallowed and walked around him, took a steadying breath, and marched toward the plane, her head back. She could do it. He was right: Honor could do anything if she wanted it bad enough.

“About time.
My good looks have been fading away while we’ve been waiting,” Ryder said when she got into the plane.

“Shut up, Ryder.”

***

The Owl Mountain UD facility was three times as large as the one in Wisconsin. The building was on a hill in the country, a white monstrosity
with trees surrounding it, as though to hide it from the world. Honor was still shaky from the plane ride, but she’d made it. She was still alive. The thought of having to do it one more time to get back to Wisconsin did not fill her with joy. Ryder had berated her the whole time, which had annoyed her, but had also kept her occupied for the duration of the short trip. She didn’t want to feel grateful to him, but she kind of did. Honor had figured out him and his ulterior motives that forever had her guessing what he was up to sometimes, amazingly, were to help her.

It was cooler in Michigan than it had been in Wisconsin; the wind was more brisk and powerful. They walked against it, toward the lit up building. Honor shivered, rubbing her hands against her arms. They stopped at a glass door. Nealon pressed his
index finger against a button. “Cleared,” an automated voice said. The door opened, he walked through, and it slid shut. Nealon turned and watched them through the door.

“You’re next, Rochester,” Burns said, flicking a cigarette to the ground.

Honor raised her finger, wondering how a little button could read her DNA to know it was her. With technology, all things were possible. The four of them stopped at a desk and were given clearance to proceed by a red-haired woman. They entered a large room full of men and women. It smelled like coffee in the room. There were two similarities between all of the agents: a gun at their hip and no expression on their faces.
This isn’t what I want to become
, Honor thought. She glanced at Ryder and saw the excitement on his face. There was the insurmountable difference between them. He wanted this and she did not.