Out Of Control (19 page)

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Authors: Desiree Holt

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“Yes,
and I apologize.” Dana broke off a tiny piece of roll, nibbling at it politely.
“I know I should have called before just showing up. But to tell you the truth,
I wasn’t sure of the reception I’d get. Everyone seems to want me to take a
hike, get out of town. Disappear. I thought maybe the surprise element would
work better.”

Ivy
took a small bite of her roll and chewed it slowly. “Most of the parents will
want to shut you out. Linc and I decided a long time ago that the only way to
get past that awful horror and keep Lily alive in our hearts was to talk about
it and try to live with it.” She brushed an imaginary crumb from her lap.

“That
has to be a difficult thing to do,” Dana commented.

“You
have no idea.” Her eyes drifted to a point over Dana’s shoulder. “At first, I
wanted nothing more than to die and be buried with my baby.” She shifted her
gaze back to Dana. “They wouldn’t let us see the body, you know. Jed Nickels—he
was the sheriff then—absolutely refused. And our pastor, when they gave him the
details, agreed. But I wanted to rip that coffin open, see the horror for
myself, and then die with her.”

Without
thinking, Dana reached out a hand and laid it softly on Ivy’s arm. The woman
flicked her eyes down at the touch, and although she didn’t flinch, Dana drew
her hand back. Okay, she wasn’t an enemy, but neither was she a friend. She got
the message.

“I
know how devastated you had to be,” she said in a gentle tone.

Ivy
let out a long, slow breath. “You can’t even begin to imagine. And Lincoln. He
was shattered, but he found strength somewhere to keep us all together.”

“How
did your boys handle it?”

“Josh
and Nate were six and eight at the time. This kind of thing was beyond their
ability to understand. Again, I give Linc all the credit for figuring out how
to reach them and help them through it.”

“He
must be a very strong man,” Dana pointed out.

“He’s
a rock.” Ivy picked at a piece of frosting on her roll. “He was our strength
and our refuge. And when we finally reached a place where we could function
again, he allowed himself to fall apart. And we were there for him.”

“You
sound like you love him a lot.”

“We
love each other,” Ivy told her. “None of us will ever forget Lily. She was a
wonderful, beautiful child. But the boys have grown into terrific men. They’ve
married really great women, and we’re all very close. It was a struggle, but it’s
definitely been worth it.”

“I
probably shouldn’t say this,” Dana said carefully, “but so many times, in cases
like this, it destroys the family.”

“Ah.”
Ivy’s look was sharp. “You’ve been talking to Lois Kelly. Or was it Mila Garza?
Sonja Escobedo? Natalie Grimes?”

“Lois,”
Dana admitted. “But I hope to speak to the others, too.”

“Tell
me something, Miss Moretti.”

“Dana.
Please.”

“Dana,
then. What do you hope to achieve here? What have you accomplished with your
other books? Help me to understand.”

“As
I tried to tell Lois, I bring a fresh pair of eyes and a research brain. Many
times I’ve spotted things investigators missed.” She sipped at her coffee,
taking time to choose her words carefully. “It doesn’t always turn out this way,
but in some of the cases, I’ve actually been able to point the police in
directions they’d overlooked. Bring a resolution to the case and closure to the
families.”

“And
you think that’s what you can do here?” The hope in Ivy’s voice was almost
painful to hear.

“I
don’t know. I never know. But I plan to try.”

Ivy
studied Dana’s face carefully. “Why this case? There must be thousands for you
to choose from.”

“I
have a special hate for people who abuse, torture, and murder children,” she
explained, striving for the right mix of professionalism and sympathy. And
trying desperately to leave her own anguish out of it. “The number of victims
in this particular case is so overwhelming, along with the fact that no one was
ever arrested. As far as I can tell, there weren’t even any suspects.”

Ivy
snorted. “No kidding. By the time I managed to pull myself together and
understand that I had two sons who badly needed me, Linc was conducting a
one-man campaign for the sheriff to bring in outside help. Any help. Anyone who
could sift through the meager clues and interviews.”

Dana
raised her eyebrows. “But he didn’t? I thought maybe I’d just missed it in the
reports I read.”

“You
have to understand,” Ivy sighed. “Jed Nickels had been on the force for fifteen
years at that time, starting as a rookie deputy. And he has deep roots here.
His people go back four generations. When he was appointed sheriff, he saw this
as his own little kingdom to rule. Anything from the outside was considered
interference.”

“But
didn’t other parents demand answers?” Dana asked, something she’d been
wondering. “Weren’t they anxious to find the killer?”

Ivy’s
chambray-clad shoulders lifted in a slight shrug. “Some did. Others were too
busy blaming themselves and each other. And this was a closed community back
then. Outsiders weren’t welcomed and bad news didn’t breach the county limits. Jed’s
word was law. If he shut down information, it stayed that way. If he chose not
to call in outside help, no one questioned him, either out of respect or fear.”

The
pain in the woman’s voice cut clear to Dana’s soul. Was that how her own mother
had felt, at least in the beginning? Later, when the initial agony passed, she’d
retreated behind a wall Dana could never breach. She didn’t even remember the
last time she’d been hugged or told she was loved.

She
pulled herself back from the well of memories. “What can you tell me about that
day?”

Ivy
refilled her coffee mug, and Dana could almost see her brain sorting through
the details of that day.

“We’d
gone to the annual rodeo. Josh was good enough by then to compete in the junior
events and we all cheered him on.” Her gaze drifted again. “About one o’clock
Linc got hamburgers and drinks for all of us and we went to sit at one of the
picnic tables in a shaded area.”

“Lily
was right there with you?”

“Of
course.” There was a trace of indignation in the tone. “We were very careful
about that.”

“I’m
sorry. I didn’t mean to imply anything.” Dana wet her lips. Now came the hard
questions. “What happened next?”

“Nate
had to go to the bathroom, and Linc was always leery of letting the boys go to
public rest rooms alone. Events like the rodeo, for example, were magnets for
drifters, so he got up to go with him.” Ivy rubbed her arms as if she was
suddenly chilled. “Someone called to Josh and when he turned around, he knocked
his drink all over the table. I was busy mopping up the mess with the extra
napkins. Lily was right on the bench next to me.”

“Did
she see something that caught her attention?”

“Only
the clown.” Ivy’s chin wobbled, and her eyes clouded with tears. She brushed at
them impatiently with the back of her hand. “Josh said she saw the clown.”

The
familiar cold feeling settled in Dana’s stomach. “The clown? There was a clown
there?”

“Yes.
Besides the ones used in the ring to distract the bulls, the rodeo committee
hired clowns to entertain the kids in the picnic area. You know, keep them from
getting restless. Lily was fascinated by them. One of them gave her a balloon
animal he made.”

The
balloon animal again.

This
was one sick bastard.

Dana
was certain now she was on the right track. Capturing the kids’ attention with
his balloon tricks made it easy to entice them away from their parents. And
somehow, he managed to choose each child carefully, making himself available
when the parents were distracted by other events.

“They’re
a great lure for children.” Dana hoped she kept the bitterness out of her
voice.

“They
certainly were for Lily. Josh said afterwards the clown motioned for her to
come to him, because when I turned around, she was just…gone.” Ivy drew in a
deep breath and let it out slowly, obviously making a great effort to center
herself again. “A four-year-old has no fear of clowns. She probably thought he
was going to give her another balloon.”

Dana
knew exactly how Lily felt. She’d been that child herself. She tried to find
something to say, but Ivy seemed on a roll and she didn’t want to stop her.

“I
yelled for her.” Her voice was insistent, begging for Dana to believe her. “Josh
yelled for her. By the time Linc and Nate returned, we were frantic, searching
everyplace.”

Dana
frowned. “No one saw where she went? Where the clown went?”

Ivy
shook her head. “The picnic tables were at the edge of the rodeo area, right
next to the fairgrounds. There’s a thick stand of trees and a road just beyond.
It wouldn’t have been any trouble for him to snatch her up and take off with
her.”

The
fairgrounds again. Dana swallowed back the bile rising in her throat. She
already knew the answer to the next question she asked.

“Wouldn’t
she have screamed?”

“Lily
was the tenth child taken. Sheriff Nickels said there were traces of chloroform
in each of their systems, so I’m guessing he sedated them immediately.”

Suddenly
the odor of chloroform was strong in Dana’s nostrils, and she scrubbed her face
with her hands, as if to wipe it away. “I assume all the clowns were
questioned?”

Ivy
tightened her grip on her mug. “Oh, yes. But no one could say exactly how many
there were. Some said four, some said five. Even the clowns themselves weren’t
sure.”

“Didn’t
people think that was strange? I mean, someone had to hire them.”

“Afterwards
I thought the same thing.” She shook her head. “But everyone was being so
defensive, no one wanted to even admit to their own names.”

“I
understand clowns were involved at some of the other events, too,” Dana
prodded. “Didn’t anyone suggest it was time to stop using them?”

“The
county changed companies, but most of the clowns were retired men who did this
for fun. No one wanted to seriously think that one of them could be the killer.
The pedophile.” She spat the last word. “And clowns had been a staple of every
county activity for generations.”

“But—”

“I
know, I know.” Ivy held up her hand. “I guess it was a case of not wanting to
believe it could be anyone we knew. Someone we considered harmless.” She
shrugged helplessly. “And then it stopped.”

Dana’s
heart almost stopped, too, at the statement. She knew why it had ended, but she
asked the question anyway.

“Did
something happen?”

“Two
little girls, Kylie and Carrie Nolan, were taken at the fairgrounds.
Apparently, whoever the man was, he’d either stumbled on or knew about an old
deserted barn almost ten miles from High Ridge. The land had been tied up in
probate for years so no one ever bothered about it. But some high school kids
were looking for a place to smoke dope and the barn looked pretty good to them.”

“Did
they see who he was?” Her heart was beating erratically.

Ivy
shook her head. “No. They must have scared him off. But they certainly got a
shock when they swung their flashlights around inside the barn. Kylie was dead
and Carrie just barely alive.”

Dana
dug her fingernails into her palms. “Does anyone know what happened to their
family?”

“Only
that they left town right away. I think they moved to another state, but we never
heard where. They buried Kylie and just…disappeared.”

Ivy
Winslow had managed to pull herself together again, but Dana needed to get out
of there. She hadn’t realized how emotionally she would be affected by all of
this. Or how the memory of Kylie, the little sister she hadn’t been able to
help, would be her undoing.

She
gathered her purse and pushed back from the table. “I’ve taken more of your
time than I intended. You’ve been very gracious and I appreciate it.”

“It
isn’t graciousness,” Ivy denied. “Don’t be fooled. A lot of people in this
town, me included, have read a couple of your books. That display in the
bookstore window really draws people.”

Dana’s
laugh was humorless. “The truth is, my publisher pays for that kind of
prominent space. I’m glad to hear it isn’t wasted.”

“You
have a good eye for things. If you can find even some little thing that will
get this bastard after all this time, I’ll do anything I can to help you.”

“Thank
you. A lot.” As Dana headed toward the door, Ivy’s words jangled an idea loose
in her mind and she turned to the woman. “As a matter of fact, there is one
thing if you wouldn’t mind.”

“Name
it.”

“Maybe
you could get a few of the other women together. Ease the way for them to meet
with me, answer some of my questions. I know the men won’t talk to me.”

Ivy
thought a moment then nodded her agreement, determination setting in on her
face. “I’ll do it. Where are you staying? I’ll set it up and call you.”

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