Out of Focus (Chosen Paths #2) (7 page)

Dalton Greer.

That, however, is the only resemblance between the two. With Dalton’s light blond hair and clear-blue eyes, they couldn’t be more opposite in appearance.

Spencer laughs and the sound of it as it travels the length of the gym; well, it warms me from the inside. I haven’t heard her laugh,
really
laugh, in years. And as soon as it hits my ears, a true smile crosses my face.

Satisfaction envelops me, and I return my attention to our instructor, who has stopped instructing. He stands a mere two feet away, silent in his observation of my impromptu grin. My brows rise in surprise, and I break my stare from his to glance around the gym. People walk slowly, tired and sweaty as they scoop up their water bottles and head toward the exit of the gym.

Hmmm.

Class must have ended while I was spying on my best friend.

Time for me to get the hell out of here.

Just as I turn on my heel, I hear, “You’re beautiful when you do that, you know.”

My forward movement comes to a jerky halt, and I slowly pivot back in the direction of Grady. I jut my chin in his direction and angle my ear to better my hearing. “I’m sorry?”

His eyes are locked onto mine as he steps forward, repeating what I was sure I just misheard. “When you let yourself smile. You’re beautiful when you do that.”

“Um, thanks?” is my brilliant response, because what the hell do you say to something stated so blatantly sincere, it literally steals your breath? I, for one, would like to know because that shit never happens to me.

Ever.

So I do the only thing I know to do in response. I conjure a grin in thanks, then begin to walk away, but what he says next stops me dead in my tracks.

“Nope. Try again. That one doesn’t count.”

I know what he’s trying to do, and damn if an ornery grin doesn’t try to cross my face at his brashness. But if I’m nothing else, I’m consistent, and I have always, and will for the rest of my days, refuse to abide by other people’s expectations. So, I clamp down on my back teeth and wheel around, completely straight-faced.

By the time I’m facing him again, he’s a step closer. “I’d like to see more of that smile. Maybe, outside of class?”

Automatically, I shake my head.

I’d like to see more of that smile.

He can’t know how much I want to touch those words and bring them close to my heart.

You’re beautiful when you smile like that.

How nice it would be to be able to hear that daily, immerse myself in such luxury.

You will never deserve true love, Cassandra.

It will never be in the cards for a slut like you.

But as flattered as I may be, I know I’ll refuse.

There’s just too much to lose. I know this with all certainty based on my initial reaction to him today. Whether it’s allowing his voice to soothe, or his touch to rile, or his stare to penetrate . . . there’s just too much potential for
feeling
when it comes to Grady Bennett.

And I cannot allow that to happen.

I was broken a long time ago, and when I was put together again, I was forever changed. My broken self didn’t really piece back together in a way that allowed me to be the same as I was before.
Feeling
is something I stay far away from, because if I were to shatter again, I know with absolute certainty there would be no coming back from that.

Therefore, I don’t
date
.

I fuck.

I get what
I
need.

Then I leave.

Spencer’s familiar giggle draws my attention, and I turn away from Grady to see her joking with her partner. Pleased as hell to hear the sound, my mouth curves upward on its own accord as I watch them walking side by side.
She
deserves to be happy.

Grady clears his throat, reeling my stare back in his direction. His eyes leave mine briefly, following the same path from where my gaze just came, then he looks back at me.

Remembering that I’m mid-conversation, I open my mouth to politely decline his offer, but he cuts me off. “And seeing as though those two have been the only ones to coax that beautiful smile onto your face for the last half of my class, I say we bring them along.”

My head jerks backward and my brows pinch in confusion. “What?”

Grady closes the distance between us, then leans into my personal space and gestures to the couple. “That’s my friend, Liam Kelley. I happen to know he’s very interested in learning more about your friend, and I’m very interested in learning about your smile. It’s a win-win.”

Is this guy for real?

I shake my head and offer a snort in reply. “You’re interested in learning about my
smile
?”

He tilts his head to the side and narrows his eyes. Then those eyes fill with such intensity, I’m held captive as he states, “I am. I want to understand why you feel unworthy of your own smile. I’ve watched you this entire class and you want to know what I see?”

I want to tell him no. To tell him I’m scared to death to know what he sees. But I don’t get a chance before he answers his own question.

“What I see is exactly this: You refuse to smile for yourself, but you smile for her. With everyone else, including me, it’s forced, but with
her
, it’s real. And it’s beautiful. I’m interested in understanding why.” He shrugs. “Call me selfish, but I also want to learn what it takes to get you to flash that gorgeous smile at me.
For
me.”

Grady finishes with another matter-of-fact lift of his shoulders, as though he didn’t just say the most profound thing anyone has ever said to me. And also, the most romantic.

My damn knees weaken
again
and I know it’s time for me to skedaddle before I’m forced to acknowledge the effect his words have on me. I break my stare just in time to see Spencer give Liam a farewell wave. She turns to head in my direction, wide grin on her face and a light in her eyes that’s undeniable. His protective stare follows her retreat and as I watch, I know I have to do this for
her
.

And with her fast approach, I know I have to do it now.

I accept his invitation with one word.

“Tonight,” I whisper, then explain. “It has to be tonight, before she has time to think about it.”

He gives no noticeable reaction to my answer. He doesn’t look disappointed. His face demonstrates nothing as he nods while taking my number.

Grady, a very perceptive individual as demonstrated about five seconds ago, does not miss the fact that this date will take place for Spencer’s benefit only. As much as it saddens me, that’s just the way it has to be. It’s the way I
am
.

But it’s his poised expression that betrays him. He’s determined. And even worse, he’s confident.

I steel my walls and give him a curt nod, resolute in my decision, before turning to intercept Spencer and guiding her to the exit.

I am doing this for her.

I
am
doing this for her.

Maybe if my head keeps repeating it, my heart will finally catch on.

But as it rouses, as it begins to pound relentlessly against my ribcage, I have a feeling my heart may be even more stubborn than Grady Bennett.

“HE’S GONE, SPENCE. HE’S
not coming back.”

The words I’d spoken to Spencer a little over an hour ago still wreak havoc in my heart. It hurt me to say them out loud, knowing the sting she would feel from my brutal honesty.

But they needed to be said.

I know she still hasn’t let go of the dream that
was
Dalton Greer, and I totally get it. I get that she fell in love with him the day she found him sitting on her porch, bruised and beaten. I understand they had a connection that formed that day, a bond that only strengthened through the years they spent together as friends. And I’m not going to lie, I was fucking
over the moon
when they finally got together.

But more than that, I can relate to losing someone important. One minute they’re there and everything is hunky-dory, the next they’re gone, with no explanation of
why
.

I’ve had my closure. We buried Rat. I know exactly where his body was laid to rest.

But Dalton, well . . . I can’t imagine the agony Spencer experienced.
Experiences
. Hoping and wishing he’d show up one day, then the next, then the next. And I think she still believes he will miraculously appear, because that’s just Spencer. Forever the optimist.

I, however, am not. And it’s my duty as her best friend to bring her back down to earth sometimes.

So I had to remind her of the obvious in the midst of her tantrum about going out this evening. I know what I saw between them, and I’d be a shit friend to turn down this date just because being around Grady makes me all weird and awkward. I may suck at my own love life, but Spencer’s I have mastered beautifully since we were in high school. I was the push needed to get Dalton to admit how he felt about Spencer, and so help me, I
will
help her find love again.

Starting with the ruggedly handsome Liam Kelley.

I have a good feeling about him.

And so will she before tonight is over, I just know it.

So as we pull into Bambino’s parking lot, with Spencer’s ridiculously loud engine drawing much unwanted attention, I affirm my plan. I will focus all efforts on Spencer, while pretending to be on a date with Grady. Totally doable.

We coast into an empty spot and once she cuts the engine and only silence exists, we look at each other and nod resolutely, grins on our faces.

At the same time, we step out of her car, and arms linked, we make our way to the front of the restaurant. As we approach, I take in Spencer’s appearance, and almost laugh. We could
not
be more opposite. Yet, that’s how we’ve always been. My yin to her yang.

I’m donning a sleek, seductive black minidress, clinging to my every curve, with matching six-inch black heels that could be lethal weapons if need be. My dark hair is in a tight bun secured to the base of my neck, and my eyes are framed with a smoky outline a shade lighter than my dress.

Spencer is
hippie
-Spencer, the only modern thing on her body being skinny jeans. She’s clad in a peasant top the color of rust, beige heels that I would deem practically flats (probably only three or four inches), and her hair is loose, tousled blonde waves, with two tiny braids crowning her head. Her blue eyes are bright with excitement, and I smile to myself at the sight before releasing her as the two men come into view.

Looking down, I carefully step ahead of Spencer, and the woodsy smell of Liam’s cologne wafts in the air as he passes to greet my friend. I grin slightly, then my eyes lift from the pavement. As soon as I see Grady, all breath escapes me. It’s an involuntary reaction, an effect I try to push to the back of my mind, but I’m helpless against it.

His light brown hair is still secured at the back of his head, highlighting his perfectly pronounced jaw as he smiles back at me. He looks absolutely gorgeous. His muscular upper body is covered by a navy blue button-down, sleeves folded at quarter-length showcasing his corded forearms, flexed as he reaches for me. My eyes drift downward, noting the perfect fit of the charcoal dress pants that hug his hips and how they break just at the right length above his black dress shoes. Slowly, my gaze lifts, and I’m met with the same striking blue eyes that captured my attention today in class, seemingly brighter as they taper at the corners with his widening smile.

“Hi,” he breathes, equally bereft of air as he takes my hand into his.

“Hi,” I answer. The soft, low tone of his voice is surprisingly powerful as it strikes against my chest. Again, my protective walls tremble with its force, but I reinforce them, refusing to acknowledge the warmth of his free hand pressed gently against my lower back. His touch remains as he guides me into the restaurant, and I also force myself to disregard the sad truth that
no one
has ever done that for me.

It feels
nice
.

I focus my attention on the low rumble of Liam’s voice from behind as he and Spencer fall into easy conversation. As we wait to be seated, I chance a glance at Grady, who seems to be eyeing the two with a bit of apprehension.