Package Deal (30 page)

A pang of bitterness she had no right to feel soured her mood.
He isn’t mourning his losses.

Sunlight played across the angular planes of his chest, and she recalled the hard feel of it against the soft fullness of her own. A chill, with no roots from the wind, traveled up her spine and tightened her nipples beneath her scant bikini top. The gentle caress of his firm hand cupping her breast burned in her memory.

A flash of heat seared her skin, having nothing to do with the sun, and she groaned with frustration, resenting his effect on her. She grabbed Lacy and jumped up, startling the child. Collecting their towels, she slipped her feet into her flip-flops then helped Lacy into hers. They scurried through the soft sand back toward the dune.

Looking over her shoulder, Lacy exclaimed, “Wait, Mommy. There’s Steve and Junker.”

“We can’t stay, Lacy. Steve isn’t our friend anymore.” She pulled Lacy along and when the child began to cry, Kelly wasn’t sure if it was Lacy’s crying or the pounding of her own heart that threatened to bring tears to her own eyes.

When they reached the front door, her cell phone started ringing. Ignoring the phone, Kelly jiggled the key in the lock, almost pushed the door off its hinges,
then
answered the cell mid-sprint.

“Kelly? It’s Jill.”

Kelly bristled, the pain inflicted by Jill’s betrayal choking any response.

Lacy strolled through the living room, dragging sand across the pale blue carpet. Kelly scowled, pointed at Lacy’s sandy feet and motioned her into the bathroom.

“What do you want, Jill?” Kelly asked in a tight voice.

“To tell you how sorry I am. I know I deserve every bit of scorn you can muster.”

Kelly’s gut tightened. She didn’t answer, not knowing how she felt or how to respond.

The sound of running water came from the bathroom. She hurried down the hall, afraid Lacy might scald herself with the hot water. Cell in one hand, Kelly stretched over the tub and tested the water. She sighed with relief. It was perfect, by accident of course. Lacy had turned both knobs—the tub was outdated—and she was bent over naked, removing her sandy suit.

“Kelly? Are you still there?” Jill’s voice called out from the cell phone.

Kelly dropped onto the edge of the tub and put the cell to her ear. “Look Jill, I’m really busy—”

“I won’t blame you a bit if you hang up on me right now, but I’ve done a lot of thinking, and I’ve come to some uncomfortable conclusions about myself, and I wanted you to hear my confession.”

Kelly took a deep breath. She was lonely and needed to believe in someone, so she listened.

“After you hung up the other night, I felt pretty sick about the whole thing. I started thinking about you, me, and the conversations we’ve had in the past. Boy, Kelly, I had to dig through a lot of slop before I saw the light. I realized, like you—who refuses to get involved with a man to keep from being hurt— that I’ve been playing it safe too, but in a different way. By dating married men, I haven’t had to make a commitment.

“My dating Ken was no different than any of the others really, even though he was no longer married to you. The fact is
,
I couldn’t openly see him without hurting you. So, like the others, I didn’t have to make a commitment.” She paused. Kelly waited.

“Not like that would ever have happened. He’s a selfish jerk, just like you always said. I’m so sorry Kel.”

Kelly’s eyes filled with tears, the terrible pain of Jill’s deception still fresh. “Jill, your dating Ken isn’t what made me so mad,” she said. “It was your hiding it from me that hurt like hell. Still does. That you could risk our relationship…” She couldn’t finish. A sob caught in her throat. “You allowed him to spin your loyalty away from me and Lacy. I can’t forgive you for that.”

“Kelly, believe me, my allegiance has always been with you. I never took his side. It’s just that you were so obsessed, so angry at him. You were making yourself sick. I just wanted to simplify things, see you happy again. Your behavior seemed so self-destructive.”

Kelly heard her take a breath.

“I admit I was stupid to ever go out with him,” Jill continued. “And my tactics to get you to forget about him were pretty naive and ill thought out. God,
Kel
, I’m so sorry. I only dated him for a month, but Ken had shown his colors long before that night on the phone. I’ve seen the selfish, irresponsible man you told me he was all along, but I thought somehow I might be able to help with this mess between you two. I asked him to leave right after you hung up. I was so disgusted with him. What an ass. I haven’t talked to him since.”

Kelly remained silent, her emotions vacillating.

“I didn’t tell him you knew he was there. I didn’t want him to have the satisfaction of knowing we’d hurt you.”

“I thank you for that much,” Kelly said, her tone cool, betraying none of the emotion she was feeling.

“Well…even if you choose never to speak to me again, you need to know Ken plans to call you from Jacksonville. He’ll be there on business sometime this weekend. He plans to ask you to meet him for dinner. He’s planning on wooing you into dropping the legal action against him, or worst case, to lower the amount of the suit. Either would satisfy him. He’s the devil, Kelly.”

“You’re telling me?” Kelly fumed while Jill unveiled all the details of his arrogant plan. Woo her back? Who was he kidding, why the conniving, egotistical bas—

“Why are you telling me all this?” Kelly snapped to her senses.

“Because you’re my best friend, and the only honest one I’ve ever had. You mean ten times more to me than anyone in the world. I knew it as soon as I heard you gasp on the phone after hearing Ken’s voice. I don’t want to lose you. You and Lacy are my family, and I’ve learned my lesson the hard way. I’m just asking for a second chance. Maybe we can help each other fix ourselves.”

Kelly’s heart, although still bruised, softened.

In a whisper, Jill said, “I love you, Kelly. I’m so sorry.” Her voice took on a conspiratorial tone. “Now listen. Ken is closing a big financial deal in Jacksonville, which is going to make him a tidy little middleman fee. When he’s trying to curl your socks, I’d let him know you’re aware of it. Tell him that if he doesn’t settle with you on your terms soon, you are going to nail him to the wall and walk out of court with a nice fat trust fund for Lacy.”

“Very shrewd, but I’m not sure I’m capable of pulling off a sting like that.”

“This is no time to get self-righteous. Ken doesn’t play fair. Well, whatever. It’s up to you,” Jill conceded. “You can use the information or not. Your choice. If you’re still talking to me when this is all over, I’d like to come out this summer, if you and Lacy will have me.”

Kelly laughed, despite herself. “Yeah, I’ll bet. Check out all the young, tanned beach bodies, right?”

“No, really.
I’m going to change. No more boy toys or married men. Girl Scout’s honor.”

“You were never a Girl Scout.”

“But you were, so the promise has meaning, right?”

Kelly laughed again, the dull ache, which had consumed her since her trip to Tampa, waning.

 
“I’m going to find Mr. Right,” Jill vowed. “I may even move to Florida, and you and I can sign up for classes together.”

“What kind of classes?”

“Commitment classes. I’m going to learn how to painlessly and fearlessly make a commitment to a man. The right man. I’m going to get married and have a daughter just like Lacy.”

“O-kay.” Kelly dragged the word out with skepticism. She wasn’t sure she was ready so soon after the McCarthy disaster to even spell the word commitment. She was still nursing her wounds and hadn’t decided yet if she wanted to forgive Jill, despite the apology and heads up about Ken.

It seemed Jill had taken a hard look into her own somewhat distorted psyche. And honestly, who was Kelly to judge? She remained silent, wavering. Jill had offered her a chance to salvage their relationship, to mend it and watch it grow. If Jill could admit her flaws, Kelly could find it in her heart to forgive her.

Jill had known nothing about Kelly’s own soul search, which Kelly realized had been disrupted and abandoned after her brutal discovery of her best friend’s secret relationship with Ken. Now, Kelly had misgivings about her own dependability and the way she’d sabotaged her relationship with Steve. Just more unfinished business in Kelly’s life.

“I’ll call you after my encounter with the other Pearson,” she told Jill. Before she hung up, she said, “Jill. I forgive you.”

As Jill had predicted, Ken phoned the following morning, wanting to meet Kelly for dinner Saturday night to discuss some kind of settlement rather than duel it out in court. Digging her fingernails into the kitchen countertop, she agreed, ice flowing through her veins when he added before hanging up, “I’ve missed you, Kel.”

She couldn’t believe her ex-husband was as stupid as he was conceited.

Chapter Thirty-Five

K
elly pulled into Murphy’s and got out of the car. Ken’s gall still unglued her, and her hands had trembled all the way to the school. It was Friday, and she hoped Connie was working this morning. She’d gotten in the habit of having breakfast at Murphy’s and chatting with her. At first she’d thought the waitress was nosey, but now she’d decided Connie was someone who could be her friend. Today, Kelly needed a friend.

“Hey!” Connie gave Kelly a warm smile and a hug.

Kelly returned both.

Connie grabbed a menu and some silverware. “How’s your week going?”

“I wish I could tell you. This week has been a nightmare and honestly…” Her throat tightened, and her eyes brimmed over with tears. “I need someone to talk to.”

“Whoa, honey. Hold on there.” Connie rushed back to the cash register counter and grabbed Kelly an extra napkin. “Dry those tears and have a seat. Maybe we can fix whatever needs fixin’.”

“I don’t know if that’s possible,” she sobbed and wiped her eyes with the napkin.

Connie grimaced, grabbed the napkin, and dabbed at Kelly’s eyes. “Come on, now. Sit down. I’ll get you some hot tea and honey.”

“Thanks. You’re an angel.”

Kelly slid into the booth and sat motionless, bent over the table, head in her hands. Out of the corner of her eyes, she recognized the two old fishermen from the day of the luggage swap. They sat at the counter, on the same stools, swapping stories again, just as they had the first day she’d met Steve. She did a mental eye roll. She’d left San Francisco, hoping to leave ghosts behind, but she’d created new ones here. Well aware of the irony of it all, she knew there was a life lesson to be learned but was too weary to ponder it right now.

Connie returned with her tea and honey and slid into the booth opposite her. “So, what are all the tears about?”

“I’ll be okay. Go back to work and don’t worry about me. Just let me sit here for a while.” She liked Connie and didn’t want to get her in trouble with the boss.

“Betty’s in the
back,
and it’s almost my break time. I think Betty can handle it. Now what’s going on?”

“It’s Steve,” Kelly started slowly, refusing to look at Connie. “I was so afraid he was going to hurt me…” She stopped, caught her breath and continued. “I hurt him, Connie. I did the worst thing…” She squeezed honey into her teacup and stirred it with a spoon. “I let him into my life then shut, no slammed the door on him. I feel so terrible, but honestly? I’m just no good at relationships. He’s better off without me.” She sniffled.

“It sounds to me as if you’re the one missing him.” Connie pulled several more napkins from the chrome dispenser on the table and pushed them toward Kelly.