Passion's Hope (The Doms of Passion Lake Book 3) (11 page)

He gave her a wink. “Service is our middle name.”

Nik hunkered down beside her leg while Jay went over and closed the blinds in the huge picture window behind her, shutting the room off from the curious stares of the passers-by. “Please wait here for us,
lapochka.
No one will bother you in here. Master Jay and I have an offer to make to you. We own the Passion Lake Lodge, a hunting and fishing paradise just about thirty miles up the road. We also own the Icebox Bar, which features live music and dancing every Friday and Saturday night. The boys in the band have been talking about adding a lead singer and since one of our waitresses left last month to move to Scotland, the others have been threatening to mutiny if we don’t hire a replacement soon.

“We would like you to consider coming to work for us instead of going to Charleston and taking a chance on auditioning for that unknown band. We’d double whatever they were going to pay you plus room and board. You would be paid a salary and, of course, you’ll keep your tips, both from waitressing and from singing with the band. I think you’ll find that the people of Passion Lake are very generous.”

Momentarily stunned, she just stared up at him trying to unstick her tongue from the roof of her mouth. This was it. The answer to all her needs. All she had to do was reach out and grab hold of it. “Nik, I-I—”

He took her head between his large hands. His eyes were gentle. Kind. Now that she looked back on it, she couldn’t recall Perry Bradford’s eyes ever looking gentle or kind. Even when he’d been smiling, his eyes had always been cold. And hard. Almost…soulless.

“Don’t answer yet, Charlotte. Just think about it. Please. And it’s Master Nik to you, little sub. At least as long as we’re here in this club tonight.” His smile robbed the words of any sting they might have had. “We’ll discuss it when Master Jay and I get back, okay? Please say you’ll think about it.”

“O-okay.”

His eyebrow hiked upward.

“Okay, Master Nik,” she corrected hastily.

“Thank you, little one.” He bent to give her cheek a lingering caress before releasing her. “We’ll be back shortly. Eat and rest. Then we’ll talk. Okay?”

She simply nodded, not wanting to lie. She had no intention of staying and talking with these men. As sexy as they were, as attracted to them as she was, when push came to shove, she was ultimately terrified of them. Okay, not of
them
per se. Of the force of the connection she felt pulsing between the three of them. Of being vulnerable to not just one, but
two
powerful men. Of the damage they could do to her without even trying.
No, no, no!

Smiling, she lifted a bacon-wrapped, stuffed shrimp to her mouth and watched the four men leave. As soon as the door closed, she dropped the shrimp, shoved the plate off her lap, jumped to her feet and grabbed her purse.
Damn!
Swept by a sudden wave of dizziness, she sank back down onto the sofa and closed her eyes. Her headache was much worse.
And it really is hot in here!

So, if that’s the case, then why am I shivering
?

She could hardly wait to get into her car and crank up the heat.

Walking toward the sink, she hesitated for a second before plunging her hand into her purse and digging around for her keys.
Ugh.
As soon as she grabbed them, she dumped them in the sink and turned on the water. Then she fished out her driver’s license and threw that in the sink, too. Quickly she washed all the food off of them and her hands and patted them dry with a hand towel she found in one of the cabinet drawers.

Grabbing her phone, keys, and driver’s license, she tossed her ruined purse into the trash can and scurried over to the door. Opening it a cautious crack, she peeked out. No one was paying any attention. Carefully closing the door behind her, she took a deep breath and walked toward the main entrance, her strides long and purposeful, expecting at any moment to feel a heavy hand on her shoulder and to hear a deep, raspy, rumbling voice calling her name.
Charlotte.
It was a sound that sent tingles coursing through her. A sound she knew she would never forget. Thank God nobody spoke to her. Nobody approached her. Nobody questioned what she was doing or called for her to stop. Within seconds she was pushing the front door open.

By the time she hit the drawbridge, she was practically running. She didn’t release her breath until she heard the click of the unlocking door in her little red Ford and she climbed in. By now she was shivering so hard her teeth were chattering. She wasted no time hightailing it out of the parking lot and back onto the road toward Charleston. She didn’t even realize she was crying until the first sob ripped through her. And then she couldn’t stop. She cried for everything. For being stupid enough to get involved with Perry Bradford. For thinking she could come to a BDSM club and get away unscathed. For allowing herself to be so totally swept away by her inexplicable attraction to Nik Rostov and Jay Gillespie. For thinking that they would be any different.

What the fuck is wrong with you? You just barely survived
one
controlling asshole. How could you possibly have considered—even for a
nanosecond—
taking on
two
controlling assholes?

Hey, now, wait just a doggone minute. They were very nice to me. Very gentle. Even…sort of…loving.

Okay, so they aren’t assholes. But they
are
very controlling. In spite of the dynamic you witnessed in their punishment session, they’re both Doms, you idiot. You wouldn’t stand a chance! They would have taken over every aspect of your life!

By that time she was sobbing so hard she could barely see the road through her tears. Her foot lifted from the accelerator and for just one brief moment, she actually considered turning around and going back. Falling to her knees and begging their forgiveness for being such a coward. Begging them for a second chance.

But she didn’t. Instead, for that one brief moment, she grieved for what might have been if she’d only been able to find the courage to stay. For the very distinct possibility that those two men could have given her what she’d been looking for all her life. Acceptance. Encouragement. Stability. But most of all, love.

* * * *

“Where is she? I left her sitting right there. Where the fuck did she go?”

Jay edged past Nik, who had stopped dead in the doorway, and moved to the center of the room, where he stood, hands on hips, turning in a slow circle. The entire plate full of the hors d’oeuvres he’d so carefully selected was sitting on the couch cushion.

Uh-oh.
His heart sped up.
And she left the Z-pack. Why didn’t she take it with her? That bite mark on her thigh was definitely infected!
He went over to pick it up and noticed her purse in the trash can. He picked it up gingerly, by one corner, and turned to look at his partner. “I think she flew the coop.”

“We’ve got to find her!” Nik looked around helplessly, as if looking hard enough would somehow conjure her up. Then he plopped down on the leather sofa, making the hors d’oeuvres plate bounce, nearly upending it. He bent forward and lowered his elbows onto his knees, letting his hands dangle between his legs. “I truly thought she might be the one,” he said in a mournful voice. “The way she responded to us…” His voice trailed off.

“I know,” Jay agreed.

For just a second, Jay thought Nik was going to cry.

“She’s in trouble, Jay. She’s ill and she’s scared. She had no business going off on her own like that. She needed our help.”

“Evidently she didn’t want our help,” Jay pointed out.

“She doesn’t know what she wants.”

“Well, she definitely knows what she
doesn’t
want. And that’s anything to do with the BDSM lifestyle. You heard her, Nik. She only came in for the food. She’s not in the market for
one
Dom, much less two.”

“She may not think she
wants
us, Jay, but she definitely needs us. Thanks to Perry Bradford, her idea of D/s is so twisted, she may never trust anyone ever again. You saw what happened when she saw the exam table. She had a panic attack! Something horrible happened to her on one of those. You know as well as I do that that’s not something you just get over. You saw how she responded to us, to the comfort we offered. She soaked it up like a sponge.”

“Until she stiffened her spine and became distant and polite,” Jay pointed out.

Nik cast a speculative look at the younger man. “She can’t be more than ten minutes ahead of us. We could go after her. She needs us,” he repeated.

“Nik—”

“I know. I know. God damn it. Why couldn’t she have trusted us?” He put his head in his hands and just sat there for a minute. When he didn’t say anything else, Jay hunkered down in front of him and put a hand on his knee.

“You know why. Because right now she doesn’t trust anybody. And, after what she’s been through, who can blame her?” He laid the side of his head against Nik’s leg. “C’mon, Papa Bear. Let’s go home. Let’s take Jesse up on his offer and take the rest of the night off. We have a lot to talk about. And I need to be cuddled.”

Nik raised his head. “You’re right,
malchik moy.”
His smile was rueful.
“
I think we both might be in need of some comforting aftercare.”

Both men stood and left the room, Nik letting Jay go first. They said good-night to all the other DM’s, most of whom embraced them and teased them about how long it had taken them to figure out that they were truly partners, not just in business, but in every sense of the word.

Nik and Jay were astonished to learn that all of them had figured it out years ago. Finally making good their escape, they walked out the back door to the employee parking lot. As they opened the doors to their Humvee, Nik joked, “Take it easy going home, boy. Unless you want me to drive.”

“I never want you to drive,” Jay retorted, pulling down the visor to let the keys fall into his palm. “My grandmother goes faster in her wheelchair than you do in this big-ass phallic symbol of yours.”

They were about half-way back to Passion Lake when they came across a little red Ford Fiesta, pulled haphazardly onto the shoulder. The left rear bumper was sticking dangerously out into the roadway. “Oh, wow,” Jay said, slowing to a crawl to see if there was anyone in the car.

“Pull off,” Nik said. “We can at least push it completely off the road, or there’s going to be an accident.”

Jay pulled around the car and rolled to a stop just beyond it. Pulling a flashlight out of the glove box, the two men got out and approached on both sides. They didn’t see anybody through the windshield, but as soon as they drew abreast of the side windows they realized that there was indeed someone inside. Charlotte Fielding. She was still seated in the driver’s seat, with her upper body sprawled across the console and her head in the passenger seat. She was hugging what looked like an enormous stuffed bunny rabbit with long, floppy ears.

Nik immediately tried the door. Locked. He rapped on the window. No response. He called her name. Still no response. “Jesus, Jay, what the hell happened here?” His gaze met Jay’s over the roof of the little car. Jay went to the back of their hummer and pulled out a slim Jim. In a matter of seconds he’d unlocked the driver’s door, yanked it open and released the rest of the locks. Both men hunkered down, Nik at her head, Jay at her ass. Nik reached in to touch her. “Holy Christ!” he exclaimed the instant he felt the heat rolling off of her. “She’s burning up with fever! Charlotte.” He tapped her cheek. “Charlotte.
Myshka
! Wake up!”

“Go ’way,” Charlie moaned, ducking her head in an effort to brush that annoying tapping away. “Lea’ me alone.”

“Not on your life,” Nik answered, lifting her head and torso and pushing her back up so she was once again in a sitting position. Okay, more like a
leaning
position. But upright enough for Jay to unbuckle her seat belt, grab her arm before she could slide back down, and pull her toward him. He slid her sideways off the seat and stood, lifting her up into his arms. Her and the stuffed rabbit she had a death grip on. She fit against his body like she’d been made just for him. He swallowed around the sudden thickening of his throat. This was a sign. He was convinced of it. They had found her again. And this time they were not letting her go.

CHAPTER FIVE

While Jay carried her over to their car and deposited her on the back seat, buckling her in, Nik was carrying on a low-voiced conversation with Lucas McKay. Pocketing his phone, he pushed Charlie’s car off the road and climbed into the Hummer’s back seat. He unbuckled the seat belt Jay had just fastened around Charlie and pulled her onto his lap, cradling her against him. “Christ, she’s like a furnace! Luc’s meeting us at the Lodge. He said to put her in a bathtub full of cold water until he gets there. I told him to just come on in through the garden.”

Jay practically broke the existing land speed record on that particular trip home. Carrying her in through their private entrance Nik took her straight into his bathroom. Sitting down with her on the edge of his over-sized Jacuzzi tub, he turned on the cold water and began filling it while Jay began divesting her of her clothes. When he tried to pull the stuffed rabbit out of her arms, she resisted, hugging it even more tightly. “Yes, baby,” he said, trying to pry her fingers open. “You have to let go. You know bunnies hate water. You don’t want to get him all wet, do you?”

As if she’d heard him, she loosened her hold and he set the light brown bunny on the counter. When he turned back to Charlotte and saw the hideous bite mark Bradford had left on her inner thigh, he let out a low whistle. “Jesus, Nik, this looks really bad. What kind of monster would do something like this?”

Nik peered over his shoulder. “The kind who needs to be in jail. Damn. I hope Jesse or Mike can convince her to press charges.”

As soon as Charlie was naked, Jay stripped off his own clothes and climbed into the tub, letting out a yelp as he lowered himself into the water. “Holy
fuck
, that’s cold!”

Nik just chuckled and lifted her over the side of the tub and onto Jay’s lap. Then he quickly divested himself of his own clothing and got into the tub facing Jay and Charlie. Shivering, teeth chattering, the two men scooped handfuls of water over Charlie’s supine figure. They were still at it nearly half an hour later when Lucas appeared in the bathroom door. “How’s she doing?” he asked, setting his bag down and getting on his knees beside the tub.

“She feels somewhat cooler.” Jay said, watching as Luc held a digital thermometer up to her forehead.

“Hundred and two,” Luc said. “Hardly cool. But I think she’s been in there long enough.” He yanked a large bath sheet off the warming rack. “Hold her up.”

Jay pushed her up and Luc wrapped her in the warm towel, lifting her out of the tub and carrying her out of the bathroom. Placing her on Nik’s bed, he sat down beside her and began patting her skin dry. She was shivering. And despite the fever she was running, her lips were blue with cold. “Wake up, sweetie,” Luc said, tapping her cheeks as Nik had done earlier and getting no more response than the big Russian had. “Jesus, she’s out like a light.”

“Should we be worried?” Nik and Jay, towels wrapped around their hips, approached the bed.

“No, it’s just her body trying to heal. She might be out of it for a day or two. Do you have an electric blanket?”

“It’s in the linen closet, boy,” Nik said to Jay. “Fetch it, please.”

“Yes, Papa Bear.”

In a matter of seconds, they plugged it in, turned it up as high as it would go and covered her with it up to her chin.

She just lay there, shivering and whimpering quietly, moving restlessly. Jay went back into the bathroom, only to emerge carrying the large rabbit. He pulled up the blanket and lifted her arm to tuck the bunny beneath it. Her eyes never opened, but the minute she became aware of its presence, she clutched it against her so tightly she was practically strangling it. But she settled right down and didn’t utter another peep.

Working quickly, Lucas inserted an IV line into her arm and hung a bag of glucose, injecting something into the line and adjusting the drip. “The glucose is mainly to keep her hydrated. The syringe has a fast-acting antibiotic. In the morning, when this bag is empty, replace it with this other one.’ He placed a second bag on the night stand. “I’ll stop by tomorrow afternoon and check on her.” He closed his bag and stood up. “When she finally does wake up, she’ll probably feel a lot better.” He hesitated. “I’m not butting in, but…okay, I
am
butting in. I think she needs to speak to someone about her ordeal with Bradford. Judging from the marks he inflicted on her, it was brutal.”

Nik and Jay both nodded. “We agree. Who do you recommend?”

Lucas just gave them a completely unrepentant grin and handed Nik a piece of paper. “Dr. Art Portman. He just moved his practice to Richmond from Seattle. His specialty is BDSM relationships. Caleb, Simon, and Ash Rafferty said he worked miracles with them after Kylie ‘s abduction.” He grinned. “I’ve already taken the liberty of speaking with him about Ms. Fielding. I called him on the way back from Risqué .He said to tell you to call him any time.” Lucas hesitated again. “I also think it would be a good idea for the two of you to talk to him about this sudden change in your own relationship. I got the feeling, watching you tonight that you were both taken by surprise at what happened between you. He might be able to help you better understand this new dynamic and put it all into perspective. Especially if you’re planning on adding Ms. Fielding into the equation.”

“He has a point, Papa Bear,” Jay said.

Nik put the piece of paper on the nightstand. “Thanks, Luc. I’ll call him first thing tomorrow morning.”

“Call me if she takes a turn for the worse. But I think she’s already started to improve and will continue to do so through the night. Good luck, you two. I think you have found a very brave submissive in Ms. Fielding.”

“Yeah.” Jay’s lips twisted. “I just hope we can get her to trust us.”

“That’s easy,” Lucas said. “Just let her occasionally be in charge. Show her that
you
trust
her.
I think that will go a long way toward winning her devotion.”

Nik and Jay just grinned and high-fived each other. “Yeah, we can definitely do that. It’ll be fun, just seeing what she comes up with.”

“Okay, guys, I’m off. Take good care of your little sub.”

“Thanks, Lucas, for all your help tonight.”

He laughed and shook their hands. “Don’t worry. You’ll get my bill.”

As soon as he left, both Jay and Nik dropped the towels from around their waists. “Are you ready,
malchik moy
?” Nik asked, heading for the over-sized leather chair in front of the fireplace. He grabbed a remote, aimed it at the opening, and a cheery fire blazed in the hearth. “Bring a blanket, boy,” he said, sinking into the welcoming softness of the sturdy chair. As Jay approached carrying a blanket, Nik patted his thighs. “Sit.”

Jay glanced over at the bed where Charlotte lay asleep and lowered his good-sized frame sideways down onto Nik’s lap. While Nik fussed with the blanket, shaking it out and pulling it up over them, Jay curled up into a semi-fetal position, laying the side of his head on Nik’s shoulder. He was a big man, but Nik was bigger and as he put his arms around him and pressed a kiss to his forehead, Jay relaxed, feeling safe and secure. And, better yet, cherished.

“So,” Jay said at the end of a sigh. “Sure took you long enough to finally realize that you’re a Daddy Dom.”

Nik chuckled. “Yeah, I guess it did. And how long have
you
known?”

“Since I first laid eyes on you,” he replied honestly. “We’ve all known. I just didn’t know about…me.”

“Well, you’d better tell me everything, boy,” Nik scolded. “No more bratty behavior. And no more holding anything back or I’ll have to punish you.”

Jay gave him a sly smile. “Well, if all of your punishments are like what you gave me tonight, you can count on my being bratty quite often.”

Nik laughed. “I will look forward to it,
moy daragohy.
”

Moy daragohy. My dear.
Jay sighed and angled his head back so he could look Nik square in the eye. “I don’t know what to tell you, Nik. I don’t know where these feelings came from. I’m not submissive. I am a true Dom. Yet lately I have found myself wanting to submit,
needing
to submit. But just to you. Nobody else, just you. There have been times when I’ve found myself longing to be forced to suck your cock and swallow your cum. Times when I’ve wanted you to Dominate me, take my choices from me. Because I trust you to take me places I’ve never been before. Places no one else but you can take me.” His gaze faltered. “God, I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”

“You must tell me, my dear boy. How else can I give you what you need if you don’t tell me what it is?”

“I-I don’t want you to feel obligated—”

Nik lowered his forehead to Jay’s, spearing him with his gaze, his need mirroring Jay’s own. “I love you,
malchik moy.
Up until now, it’s been like a brother. I can’t wait to begin exploring this new side of our relationship. You can trust me to give you what you need.”

“I know, I just—it’s—it’s not something I’m going to want all the time, Daddy. At least I don’t think it is.”

“I understand that, boy.”

“I don’t know where this is coming from.” Jay’s frustration was evident in his voice, the tension of his muscles. “I know I’m not gay. And I know you aren’t either. But I love you. As my friend. As my partner. And now, God willing, as my Dom and my lover. It’s something I’ve been thinking about for a long time.”

“How long?” Nik wanted to know.

“At least two years. There have been times lately when I’ve dreamed I was being fucked by you. I’ve never dreamed that about anybody else. Nor would I want it from anybody else.
Only
you.” He sighed and nuzzled his face against Nik’s neck.

“I’m not a ‘little’,” Jay went on. “I don’t want or need a full-time Daddy. But ever since I’ve known you, I have naturally looked up to you. You have been my confidant. My guide. My teacher. You have been the anchor in my life, more than my father or brothers ever were. You have all the qualities found in every good Daddy Dom. In spades. I know you’ve often accused me of being bratty. But lately I’ve come to realize that the times when I’m at my brattiest are the times I’ve found myself longing for just those qualities from you.. Longing for you to hold me and reassure me and comfort me like I’ve seen you do with so many of our subs over the years. The times when I’ve needed you to be my Daddy Dom.”

Nik’s arms tightened around him. “Why did you not tell me, Jay?”

Jay just shook his head helplessly. “And let you think I was crazy? Because
I
certainly thought I was crazy. I don’t understand these needs. I can’t explain them to myself. How could I possibly explain them to you?”

Nik’s lips quirked. “Well, I don’t know about you, but it seems to me you just did a damned fine job of explaining them.”

Jay lifted his gaze to Nik’s, his eyes swimming with anguish. “Besides, if I needed this and you didn’t, telling you about it would have placed me in a very vulnerable position.” His lips compressed. “Still might.”

The two men stared at each other, probing deep into each other’s souls. Finally, Nik said. “I, too, have been wanting all these things, Jay. I think I’ve wanted them for a long time. But I was afraid to tell you, for fear of losing the one thing I value most—your friendship.”

“And I was afraid of losing yours,” Jay admitted. “I was afraid you would end our partnership and not want to have anything more to do with me.”

“See what fear does to people?” Nik commented philosophically. “It destroys trust. If we hadn’t hidden behind our fears, we could have begun this new aspect of our relationship long ago. And just to lay those fears to rest forever, nothing you say or do will ever make me want to end our partnership or kick you out of my life.”

Jay’s throat was so thick with unshed tears, he could barely squeeze his next words past them. “Thank you, Daddy. I love you.”

Nik’s arms tightened around Jay. “Me, too,
malchik, moy.
Me, too. But you must promise me, no more secrets. You come to me with anything that concerns you, you hear me? I will do my best to give you everything you need,”

“Yes, Daddy.” Jay grinned.

* * * *

Holy shit!
Charlie slowly released the breath she’d been holding as she’d listened to Nik and Jay’s low-voiced conversation.
These men are so fucking hot! And they sound like they truly do love each other!
That was something she’d been looking for all her life. Something she’d mistaken Perry Bradford’s attention for. A mistake, however, she was not about to repeat with these or any other men.

Her head was pounding and her entire body ached. She felt like she’d been run over by a herd of stampeding buffalo. What was she doing here? And where
was
here, exactly? Was she back at Club Risqué? Possibly in one of their private rooms? No, no, that couldn’t be right. The last thing she remembered was driving away, crying so hard she could barely see the road. And then…nothing. Had Nik Rostov and Jay Gillespie hunted her down and forced her to come back with them?
No. No. I refuse to believe that. These are honorable men! Not at all like Perry Bradford. And every new thing I learn about them only confirms that. So where the fuck am I?