Player: Stone Cold MC (13 page)

I gripped the one hand that still had a lip to hold onto as tight as I could. My body scraped against the bricks, as I swung against the rough wall. My chin burned where there would no doubt be a graze. The raw metal lip dug into my skin with bits and pieces of broken glass still at the edges. I dangled like an idiot from the building by an arm, but it was enough to save myself.

Swinging my other hand up, I grabbed onto the lip and then pulled myself up. It hurt like a bitch, biting into my skin, but there was no turning back now. I hooked my leg over the windowsill and pulled myself into the building, collapsing on the floor beneath the window on the other side.

I was in a room that must have been an office at some point. There were marks on the wall where a desk must have bitten into it and scuff marks on the floor. The door was open and leading to the rest of the dark warehouse.

I had no idea where to start looking, so I started at the bottom and worked my way up. It took me a good two hours to work through all the offices and other rooms and I ended up with nothing. Dammit.

I walked back down to the stretch of floor that made up the bulk of the warehouse and stood in the middle, rubbing my hands over my face. It was heading on towards dawn, and I had to get out of here before the sun came up or I’d risk someone seeing me leave the place.

I spotted another broken window, one that was much lower, and walked toward it. Getting out was going to be easier than getting in, thankfully. I’d almost reached the window when the sound of my footfall changed from the empty steps on concrete to a hollow clanking on metal. I looked down and noticed I was on a kind of trap door. In the darkness I hadn’t been able to see it.

I felt around in the dim lighting and found a small ring. When I pulled on it the trap door lifted. Stairs led down into a pit of darkness, and I followed it because this was the last place I could look before admitting defeat. When I reached the bottom, a thin chain hit my face and I grabbed it and pulled. A light clicked on, washing through the underground storage facility.

Shelf after shelf lit up. I’d expected to find the brown box and make off with it. I hadn’t expected so any of them. And other kinds of containers as well, bags, plastic ice cream tubs, black bags, you name it.

They were all stacked on the shelves.

I was in some sort of drug highway.

The air smelled musty from being enclosed for so long. But this was exactly what I’d been looking for.

I took one wooden box off the shelf and shifted everything so that it didn’t look like one was missing. I clicked off the light and went back up the steps and closed the trap door behind me. It took me all of a minute to get out of the building, around the exterior, and into the street. I couldn’t stay there long now, but I would be back.

Holy shit, if I could play this with Rat over and over again, I would definitely be back.

And rich.

I checked my phone for the twentieth time and swore under my breath. I hadn’t heard from Rip since he’d left on Sunday. It was already Thursday morning, and he wasn’t responding to my texts or answering his phone.

I refused to feel sad about that. We weren’t dating, for God’s sake. I didn’t give a shit about him. But I did have an issue with the fact that he never left the money behind as I’d thought he would. I’d been stupid and I hadn’t demanded my share. And he’d left with it.

Wasn’t that just perfect?

I called his cell again. It was off this time, shooting straight to voicemail. Dammit. It was a lot of money, and I wanted it. It was my half of our winnings. After we’d had to pay so much to the Crucifix Six, there was still something left. And now he wouldn’t give it to me.

What if something had happened to him? I’d spent the last couple of days being irritated with him that he hadn’t bothered to give me my money, or show up to talk to me about it. But what if they’d done something to him?

I shook my head. I wasn’t going to make excuses for him. If he really was as on top of his game as he liked to tell me he was, he was still alive and kicking and he had my damn money.

If I didn’t hear from him by nightfall, I was going out to find him. This was getting ridiculous, and I hated that he made me look like a needy woman because he wouldn’t contact me. But what was mine was mine, and in this case, I wasn’t talking about a lover but cash.

I spent most of the day cleaning. Again. My house was spotless now. It was something I tended to do when I was frustrated or angry—and the last couple of days I’d been both.

I checked my phone again after I finished. It was after lunch and still nothing.

By the time the sun started setting behind the horizon, I shrugged into my coat and put on boots before I got in my car and drove to the other side of town. It felt good to be driving. When I was out gambling, I took a cab so I didn’t get charged with a DUI, but it was nice being in control of something.

I drove to the motel where he’d mentioned he stayed. The parking lot was strewn with a lot of potholes, and I parked in a bay that was barely demarcated with white paint…most of it was faded.

I got out and pulled my coat tighter around myself, feeling like I was in danger of getting contaminated by something. How could he stand staying here?

When I walked into reception, it was a little better. The place was rundown and worn but not neglected, and it was clean. An old lady stood behind the counter, her hair looking like she went once a week that get it colored for gray regrowth and permed. She had lips that were too red and blush on her cheeks that suggested she couldn’t see well enough to balance out her makeup in the mirror anymore.

“I’m looking for Rip…” I stopped myself and tried again. He had a different name he used, I remembered. “I’m looking for a guest called Ben Reeker.”

The old lady leaned forward, as if she couldn’t hear me too well. When she got the name right she looked in her books, her finger slowly sliding down over the names. She frowned.

“Let me look in the other book,” she said. She opened a blue book and did the same thing, mouthing the words as she went along. Finally she landed on one, nodded, and looked up.

“I found him,” she said. “But he checked out yesterday. That was why he wasn’t in the current guestbook.

“Do you have any idea where he went?” I asked and I knew right away that it was a question that I wouldn’t get answered.

“Sorry, deary. I don’t know.”

Of course she wouldn’t know. I nodded, thanked her, and left the place. Back in my car I leaned forward and put my head on the steering wheel, blowing out a deep breath that I’d been holding since I came out of the office. It was time for me to start accepting the fact that Rip had betrayed me. He’d used me for sex and tips, and then he’d made money and made a run for it.

It was so like me to get involved with the wrong guy, even if it wasn’t in a romantic sense. And money was running low, too.

Fucking. Perfect.

I had no idea where I was going to find him now. I didn’t even know if he’d skipped town, or if he was still around. I didn’t know if he’d found people that were more worth his time than I was, or more worth his efforts, skill, money…

Whatever. I wasn’t going there. Besides him being a low-life piece of shit who got me to trust him when I shouldn’t have, he was nothing to me. Thank God I hadn’t fallen in love with him. I’d grown up since the last man I’d been with.

My sister called when I got in. I was just in time to snatch the landline off the receiver before it switched to voicemail. Seeing that it was full, she wouldn’t have been able to leave a message. I really had to take care of that.

“You sound out of breath,” she said when I panted into the receiver after running for the phone.

“I just got in,” I said.  I sat down on the couch, legs over the armrest.

“How are you?” Cass asked.

I could be better. “I’m fine. Just been busy.” With what? Running after cheats and liars?

“That’s good,” she said, but she hesitated as if she didn’t really believe me. She knew me well, and it was irritating. “Dennis was off school this week with a cold.”

“Is he okay?”

“You know kids, a cold can be so bad when they’re young and it just gets better in time. I can’t wait until his immune system is stronger. I worry all the time.”

I chuckled. “I don’t think an immune system makeover is going to make you worry any less. You’re a mom, you’re always going to worry about something.”

I could almost see my sister shrugging.

“Why don’t you come and visit us? It will be great to see you, and we’ll pay for your ticket and everything.”

“You don’t have to do that, I can afford my own ticket,” I said. That was assuming that I was going to get some money sometime soon.

“Nonsense. It will be our pleasure, and it will be such a treat to see you.”

I had to think about that one. As much as I loved my sister, I didn’t like spending time with her and her family. It was a terrible reminder of everything I didn’t have.

“How’s Collin?” I asked, changing the topic. She knew I was avoiding giving her an answer, but she played along. Thank God for that. 

“He’s great. He got a promotion at work so we’re doing better now financially. Every little bit helps, you know?”

I did know. I knew how much it sucked when there was no cash flow at all. As was the case right now.

“I can imagine,” I said.

“When are you going to think about getting a man again? You deserve someone nice.”

I groaned. “Are we really going to go into that again?”

“Come on, Alex, you need someone nice in your life who will look after you. If you find someone nice, you can stop the gambling.”

I rolled my eyes. “I knew it was going to go into this,” I said. “I can’t ever just talk to you without my disappointing life looming over me.”

I lay back on the couch and balanced the phone on my stomach. I closed my eyes and waited for my sister’s excuses that were inevitably going to come.

“That’s not what I’m saying,” she said. Bingo. “I just want you to be able to relax and not worry about money all the time. And not hang out in those unrighteous places.”

I chuckled. “Casinos aren’t from the devil,” I said.

There was a beat of silence before she carried on. “All I’m saying is that it would be nice to have someone else take care of you for a change.”

I shrugged even though she couldn’t see it. “I’m fine on my own. I enjoy being by myself.” I saw Rip sitting shirtless at my breakfast table, the hard edges dimmed by sleep.

“You know, just because Tom was such an asshole doesn’t mean they’re all like that,” she said.

“We don’t have to talk about Tom,” I said tightly. I didn’t like it when other people brought him up—like talking about him and what had happened was fine. It wasn’t fine, and I preferred not to mention his name ever again.

“Sorry, Alex,” she said. “You know I just mean well.”

And I did. She really did mean well. She just didn’t always know how to show it.

“I’m just saying a man who can distract you from all the real life things isn’t a bad idea.”

I flashed on Rip’s naked body all over me—his broad shoulders and his muscles moving under his skin. Look what that damn distraction had gotten me. I pushed the images away.

“You really don’t have to worry,” I said. “I’ve got everything I want. A home, money, what else do I need?”

She was silent again for a while, and I closed my eyes.

“Well, that’s true. At least you have money coming in. And a lot, by the sounds of things.”

Shit. I’d told her about Rip and the money. The money that wasn’t happening now. My stomach clenched in a tight fist of nerves when I thought about the money. Shit, losing him was nothing—I would bounce back. But losing all that money? That was a lot of stability down the drain.

“I know, it’s nice to have a bit of peace of mind,” I lied.

“Are things going okay with him?”

No. “Sure.”

“Well, I hope so. It’s a shame you need to get lost in this kind of world just because life got you down.”

I sighed. “This kind of world isn’t so bad, Cass. It’s fun. I like what I do.”

“I just can’t help but think it’s my fault,” she said. “If I’d been there more…”

“Don’t,” I said, cutting her off. “Don’t go there. I can’t do that tonight.”

“I’m just saying. If I were there for you a bit more when you really needed it, maybe you wouldn’t have fallen into these habits of yours.”

“Is that what we’re calling them now?” I asked. I was getting annoyed. She always knew how to keep pushing until an okay conversation with her turned into a not-okay conversation. “Why don’t you just come out and say it. I know you’re thinking it.”

“Come on, Alex.”

“Say it,” I spat. .

“Fine. Addiction. I just can’t help but think you need to see someone.”

I pushed myself upright, feeling like I couldn’t defend myself properly on my back. “You see, that’s the problem. You’re always thinking that my life isn’t good enough, just because you hit the jackpot. I’m happy for you that you met a nice guy and you have the baby and the picture perfect life. I’m thrilled. But that’s not how it worked out for me, and I’m making the best of it. I’m not doing drugs, I’m not relying on alcohol to get me through, and I’m not leaning on some drunken asshole to be my prince charming. So you can take your comparisons and your judgement and you can shove it right up your ass.”

“Alex…” my sister started, but I didn’t give her the time to finish. I hung up the phone before she could say anything else about my life.

Dammit. I got up and swore under my breath, trying to walk off the rolling nausea that always came when she brought up the past. I hated it when she did that. I didn’t talk about it for a reason. I made my life work, and that was all that was important. I didn’t like thinking about the past and what brought me here. I just wanted to move forward. Damn sister…always there for me, but it came at such a high cost.

I picked the phone up and slammed it down onto the little table where it belonged, swearing. I didn’t want this; I didn’t need this. I’d gotten to a point where I knew how to push away the memories and the thoughts and seal them off so that they didn’t tumble out and cause havoc in my life.