Authors: Jennifer Saginor
world how her diagnostician saved her life.
Shortly thereafter, the Hollywood invitations began to pour in.
My parents were treated with celebrity status at movie pre-
mieres, nightclubs, and art openings. There was a two-month wait-
ing list to book an appointment. His office was always full of rock
stars, professional athletes, Playmates, models, and actresses sucking
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Playground
on sugar-free lollipops with hopes of transforming themselves
into perfection.
One of the Playmates teases his sandy-blond hair and then looks
down at me. “Who’s this pretty young thing?” she asks in a high-
pitched voice.
“Have you met my daughter?” Dad asks.
The girl giggles, bends over, and shakes my hand. I stare at her
big boobs as my father pulls me into the marble foyer now packed
with bright, smiling faces. We climb the staircase as he leads me
down the upstairs hallway. A tall glass cabinet filled with naked
figurines in weird positions catches my eye.
Hundreds of framed photographs line the hallway. My father
points out Farrah Fawcett, Vanna White, Dorothy Stratten, Kenny
Rogers, Dolly Parton, James Caan, Aaron Spelling, Jimmy Connors,
Sammy Davis Jr., and Frank Sinatra, who he says are all patients.
We stop in front of a closed door.
“Number two is my room. If you need anything, the butlers
will get it for you.”
Dad opens the door. The room is massive. There’s a king-size
bed to the left and windows overlooking the garden to the right.
An armoire with a large television is in front of the bed along with
a wooden chest of drawers. I take a few steps into the room and
run past the closets to the back where there’s a marble bathroom
with two toilets!
“Use the phone to order anything you want. I have to get back
to the game,” Dad instructs, hugging me good-bye.
When he’s gone, I open the door and walk slowly down the
hallway, making my way back down the grand staircase. I wander
through a circus of strangers. Everyone looks past me. I open a
small stained-glass door with an iron knob, which leads to the
backyard.
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J E N N I F E R S A G I N O R
A butler in a black suit startles me as I step into the outdoors.
“Your father asked me to show you the pool,” he says, peering
down at me.
“How do you know who I am?”
“I just do.” He smiles.
The butler escorts me down a cobblestone pathway, through
the backyard and into a rock-lined corridor with tons of changing
rooms. He hands me a robe and towel along with a plastic con-
tainer filled with bathing suits.
“Is there one for me?”
“Of course. Mr. Hefner is very accommodating to his friends
and family,” the butler informs me.
I select a slightly oversize orange polka-dot bikini, and the but-
ler guides me into one of the changing rooms. He closes the door
as he leaves.
I look around the changing room noticing the open shower
and plants covering the glass window. Different-colored robes and
matching towels line the closets. One of the shelves has an enor-
mous supply of Listerine, Q-tips, Dove soap, Lubriderm lotion,
Vaseline, aspirin, toothbrushes, and boxes of Trojans stacked neatly
on shelves.
After changing, I open the door to find the butler waiting for
me outside.
“Ready?” he asks and we walk past an outdoor bar and over to
a bigger section of the pool.
“You don’t have to watch me,” I tell him.
“That’s all right, I don’t mind.” He smiles as I get in and swim
under the water, away from him.
There is a mountain in the center of the pool that creates a U
shape, so I follow it around the bend. Beyond the ripples from the
waterfall, I notice a strange, spooky black hole that looks like it
could suck me in if I’m not careful. I swim over to take a closer
look; it appears to be some sort of tunnel.
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Playground
“Stay away from the tunnel!” the butler shouts as I come up for
air.
“Why?”
“It’s for adults,” he says sternly, so I swim over to the step in the
shallow end.
“I’m thirsty. Can I have something to drink?”
“What would you like?”
“Juice, please.”
“Do you mind stepping out of the pool while I’m gone?”
“Sure,” I say, trying to be the picture of sweetness.
When the butler is out of sight, I dive back in and swim under-
water toward the tunnel. As the black hole comes into view, goose
bumps prickle up and down my arms and legs. I circle around it
for a few seconds. The water seems different here: it’s darker and
there’s a strong current swirling around the rocks.
Closing my eyes, I envision a mystical passage into a foreign
land.
I plunge in, holding my breath.
Underwater, panic sets in immediately as my hands feel along
the endless, rock-lined passage. I try to turn around, but the water
is rushing too quickly and I become disoriented, my lungs aching
for breath. I push myself forward, willing myself to the end, hop-
ing desperately that there is an end.
I push against the tunnel with my feet, forcing myself upward.
Finally, I surface. I look around frantically while taking huge gulps
of air.
I’m in a large dark cave. There is only candlelight. The Beatles’
“Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” plays softly. There are several
couches lining the interior of the cave, but I can’t see well, so I
swim over to one of the bigger pools, paddling with all my might
to hold myself up. I lean against a jet, and finally it registers—I’m
in a gigantic Jacuzzi!
I hear moaning sounds over the gurgles of water. I peek around
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J E N N I F E R S A G I N O R
to locate where the noise is coming from. My eyes squint as they
begin to investigate.
Something moves on one of the couches. The something be-
comes clearer and I see that it is a naked man. There is another fig-
ure too. A naked lady is sitting on top of him and she’s bouncing
up and down. Her boobs are flying everywhere. I know that I’m
not supposed to be seeing this. Later I learn it was John Belushi
screwing one of the Playmates.
I am no longer six. I have grown to full maturity in a matter of
seconds.
The lady moans.
I sneeze.
“Hey! What are you doing in here?” the guy yells, as he contin-
ues bucking under the moaning girl.
Terrified, I take a deep breath, dive into the pool, beneath a
waterfall, and swim frantically out of the Jacuzzi. I come up for air
and open my eyes. The butler’s face stares back at me.
“I was playing hide-and-seek and got lost,” I say quickly.
I climb out and race past him, wiggling my way into the chang-
ing rooms. I’m so completely shocked that I throw on my clothes,
barely drying myself. I sneak back down the hallway made of
rocks, coming to a halt as the couple from the cave heads my way.
They’re coming after me.
I duck down another outdoor hallway, running toward a small
white door. I throw myself through the door and am bombarded
by flapping wings. I hit the floor as screeching noises thunder
overhead.
It feels like an hour of being surrounded by shrieks and cries
before I realize I’m in a huge birdhouse.
I dart outside again. It’s getting dark and I don’t know which
way to go. I’m too terrified to go back to the Mansion because now
it looks like a haunted house. I stop to catch my breath when a
man with a walkie-talkie appears out of nowhere. My stomach
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Playground
drops as I skitter down a pathway lined with tall trees and thick
grass. I hide behind a large shrub.
Another man is walking down the path toward my hiding
place. There is a small house on the grounds, much smaller and
safer looking than the haunted Mansion, so I make a run for it.
The lights are on inside and I race up the steps to the front door.
It’s unlocked. I turn the handle and peer cautiously into the dimly
lit room. The room’s interior looks like a warm, cozy lodge deco-
rated with high beamed ceilings, rustic wood paneling, and green
plaid carpet. An old-fashioned piano plays eerily by itself in the
corner. Objects of Pop Art fill the corners: oversize bottles of Pepsi
and Coke, and cans of Campbell’s soup. Images of icons of the for-
ties and fifties like Judy Garland, Elizabeth Taylor, Liza Minnelli,
and Marilyn Monroe line the walls. The room has all my favorite
pinball machines.
I have found the coolest, most secret arcade.
I grab handfuls of red and yellow gumballs from bowls on the
tables in the middle of the room, and stuff them into my pockets.
There’s a picture of Hef surrounded by girls on one of the pinball
machines.
I see shadows flickering in a blue-painted room. I dash across
the arcade, through a mirrored door, and almost trip as I sink
into carpet three inches deep. There are mirrors on every wall,
even on the ceiling. I lock the door, noticing a box of Kleenex,
pads of paper with bunny ears on them, and a sea of cushions on
the floor.
Sinking back into the carpet, I flip the television on and see
naked people rolling around on the screen! I spin around, wonder-
ing if anyone is watching. The images remind me of the man and
lady in the Jacuzzi. The bottom of the screen reads, You are watch-
ing the Playboy Channel.
I’m afraid and curious at the same time. Someone pounds on
the door.
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J E N N I F E R S A G I N O R
“Jennifer!” Dad raises his voice.
I shut off the television and immediately begin taking hoards of
gumballs out of my pockets, shoving them underneath the pillows.
“Hang on, I’m trying to open the door,” my voice quivers.
Please, God, don’t let him be mad at me. I promise I’ll never go
into that cave again. He continues banging on the door as I franti-
cally try to unlock it. The door finally opens and my father hovers
over me!
“Don’t ever lock this door again!” he shouts.
We ride home in silence. My heart races. Am I in trouble? What
if Dad knows I saw those people?
Dad pops in a cassette of the Eagles. I catch him stealing
glances at me, but I don’t turn my head. He begins to sing along to
the words and eventually I begin to relax.
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I t’s Thursday, Dad’s day with us, and I can’t wait to jump in his
pool. The school bell rings and I race through the hallway and run
outside to wait for Carmela to pick me up.
I see Dad’s Rolls-Royce parked across the street with Christo-
pher Cross blaring from his tape deck. My sister, Savannah, waves
me over.
Savannah is about two and half years younger than I am. She’s
a cute little girl with golden blond hair, big blue eyes, and a smile
that illuminates a room. She’s a typical girl, one who likes to wear
dainty sundresses and tie yellow bows in her hair. Her favorite
thing to do is put on her ballerina leotard and dance around the
house. She is happy but also emotionally fragile and quick to cry.
She slides into the backseat of the car as I hop into the front
seat, taking my position next to my father.
J E N N I F E R S A G I N O R
“I need to make a quick stop at the Mansion,” Dad tells us.
“We want go to McDonald’s,” I whine.
“Don’t bug me,” he snaps back and my stomach tightens. He’s
been snapping at me more and more recently. We pull up to those
huge iron gates. The rock speaks again and I’m fearful of what this
visit will bring.
We head up the long driveway as gardeners spritz the exotic
flowers that dot the lawn. The castle comes into view.
“Are we at Disneyland?” Savannah asks.
“It’s more like a haunted house,” I mumble.
“Why would you tell your sister that?” Dad rasps at me harshly
as he hurries us out of the car and into the front door.
Savannah stares at the butlers in the funny black suits. One of
them offers to take Dad’s briefcase.
“Good afternoon. Should I put this in your room?” the butler
asks my father.
“Yes, thank you,” he responds.
I don’t say anything, but still wonder why my father has a room