Playing Dirty (A Bad Boy Sports Romance) (17 page)

Chapter Twenty-Two

Kate

Jay was staring at me like he’d seen a ghost.

“Jesus….Kate!”

He was at my side before I could even exhale, his strong arms wrapping around me and pulling me close. I let out a deep breath—the breath it felt like I’d been holding since Jay had left—and snuggled close against his muscular torso. When I was with Jay, everything else faded away. The screaming and the shouts in the airport seemed to vanish, and I was able to feel strong, safe, and loved.

“I didn’t get on the plane,” I said softly. Jay held me at arm’s length and looked me over, his blue eyes penetrating every open pore, every surface of my skin.

“I can see that,” he said. “Christ, you have no idea how glad that makes me, Kate.”

“I couldn’t. I had to tell you something.” Suddenly, I was nervous again. It didn’t seem fair, that I’d gotten to escape death and get a second chance at life, and now I was nervous about telling Jay that I’d fallen in love with him.

Jay shifted his weight from foot to foot and grabbed me close to him, crushing me against his chest. “You can tell me from here,” he mumbled into my hair. “I’m not letting you get away for a bleeding second.”

I grinned into his chest as his hands stroked over my hair. “I love you,” I said softly. Then, louder: “I’ve fallen in love with you, Jay. Head over heels.”

He stepped back and looked into my eyes. A lick of desire shot through me and I shivered. I knew it wasn’t right or appropriate to be feeling that way, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted him—it was probably at least partially a reaction to all of the stress that I’d gone through since Jay had left this morning—but I wanted him now, more than ever.

“I love you, too,” he said. “I love you, Kate.”

We hugged again. It felt closer, more intimate this time, like we were really reacquainting ourselves with each other’s bodies. Jay smelled like soap and aftershave, and I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, enjoying the masculine scent as it washed over me.

“I couldn’t get on the plane without telling you that,” I said softly. “I had to let you know. And I had to tell you in person, I didn’t want to FaceTime or tell you over the phone. It had to…it had to come right from me, does that make sense?”

He leaned back and nodded. “I am so bloody glad you felt that way,” he said, rubbing his close-cropped hair. “I had no idea what I was going to do if I lost you. I was on the phone with my mate, Connor, and he told me to turn on the TV. I half expected to see you, but when I saw the plane…” He choked on his words and covered his eyes behind his hands. “I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you, Kate. I couldn’t stand that at all.”

“I wish I had called you to tell you I was okay,” I said. “My phone died, I was playing with it too much before security. And then the payphones were mobbed—I think everyone had the same idea as me.”

“A call would have been nice,” he said. “But I understand. I’m glad I’m here, and I’m glad you are too.”

We stood facing each other in silence for a moment. Something had changed between us; it felt more serious, less capricious, and I knew in my gut that Jay was the man I’d be spending the rest of my life with. It was crazy…we hadn’t even known each other for a full month.

But I knew.

“I’ve never been this happy in my life,” Jay said, as if confirming everything I’d just thought to myself. “This is it for me, Kate. I can’t even tell you how scared I was at the thought of losing you,” he added, choking up slightly.

I took his hand and led him to a nearby bench where he sat with a grateful sigh. “I thought I was going to lose you forever,” he repeated. “I couldn’t go through that, not again…” Jay’s voice trailed off. “I couldn’t lose you, but especially because I hadn’t yet gotten the chance to tell you how much I love you.”

My eyes teared up as I stared at him. He was overcome with profound emotion, and it was affecting me as well. A trail of hot salty tears dripped down my cheek, and Jay reached over and laced his fingers with mine, pulling them close.

“That’s what happened with my parents,” he said softly. “I…I never got to tell them how much I loved them. It was the day of my confirmation, the day I joined the church. They wanted me to go home for supper with them but I wanted to go play with my best friend in the park. When they got in the car to leave, it exploded immediately. Someone had planted the bomb while we were all in church.”

I sucked in a deep breath. Jay’s story was heartbreaking. As much as he’d told me about the past, I’d never imagined anything quite that painful.

“Jay, they must have known how much you loved them,” I said softly. “And I bet wherever they are now, they’re very, very glad that you weren’t in the car with them that day.”

Jay didn’t reply. Instead, he pulled me into a tight, intimate hug and I closed my eyes and let him stroke my hair. All around us was chaos. The airport had bloomed into a fantastic mess of people and luggage. Adults wailed and hugged each other like toddlers, and children ran forgotten on the maroon tiled floor.

“We have to do something,” I said under my breath. “We have to help these people.”

There were two people crying and holding each other, on the floor, not twenty feet from where Jay and I stood. They were sobbing so intensely that I could barely make out their facial features, and just watching them was enough to hurt my heart. Suddenly, I felt intensely guilty about being so selfish.

“This isn’t just about us,” I said quietly. “Come on.”

Jay followed me as I walked over to the women and knelt down to where they were kneeling. Putting on the brightest expression I could muster up in the circumstances, I reached into my bag and handed over the jumbo sized bottle of water that I’d bought for the flight.

“I think you could both use this a lot more than me,” I said, as casually as I could muster. The women broke their embrace and turned to me with red eyes and faces streaked with tears.

“Thank you,” one of them muttered before reaching forward and taking the bottle of water. She unscrewed the cap and took a long, deep drink before handing it to the other woman. After a few seconds, some of the color returned to their cheeks.

“Thank you,” the other woman said.

“Of course,” I said. “Is there anything we can help you with? Is there anyone you want us to call?”

The older of the two nodded. “My daughter,” she said. “She doesn’t know where I am, and she will fear the worst.”

I helped the woman call her daughter on Jay’s cell phone, taking the phone and explaining what had happened, then passing it back to the woman. The conversation took less than five minutes and by the time she’d hung up, the woman was crying again. But this time, I could tell, it was tears of relief and joy.

“Thank you so much,” the woman said. “Thank you, you are an angel for helping us.”

Jay had been standing off to the side and watching the whole thing, and when he rejoined me, he looked at me with clear admiration in his blue eyes. “You’re a bloody saint,” he told me. “I can’t believe I’m lucky enough to get someone like you.”

“It was the least I could do.”

We began the slow, exhausting process of moving around the airport and trying to comfort those who needed it the most. My heart broke multiple times for these people, these people who had lost a loved one, and I wished I could’ve helped to heal them all. The hardest was a boy who had watched his mother get on the plane—she was going to America to study abroad for the summer—and his father hadn’t been able to explain what happened. He was clearly still in shock, standing there listlessly while his son looked around with wide eyes, asking if his mother would ever come home now.

“They’re still looking for survivors,” I said softly to the father. “There’s a chance she made it.”

I didn’t want to give them false hope, but at the same time, hope was all we had right now, while we didn’t know what was going on.

Jay came up behind me and squatted down to the boy’s height. The boy, suddenly shy, darted behind his father. But Jay wasn’t deterred. “Hello there,” he said. “Do you like football?”

The little boy nodded, and he slowly peeked out from behind his father’s legs. His father was a young man, not much older than Jay and myself, who looked weary with grief. He watched carefully as Jay coaxed the boy out, then wrapped an arm around him and pulled him close.

“When I get sad, I play football,” Jay said. “That’s what I’ve always done.”

The boy nodded shyly, and Jay continued.

“You’re being much braver than I’ve ever been, you know that?” he said.

The boy nodded again and Jay pulled him into a surprising hug. I found myself touched as I watched their interactions; Jay was such a good man, with such a big heart that I couldn’t help a few more tears from leaking down my face.

“Promise me you’ll stay strong,” Jay said to the boy. He reached into his pocket and came back with his keys. “This is my special football keychain,” he said, fingering a Manchester United strip of red, gold, and black. “But I think you’re going to need it more than I do.”

The father seemed to have recognized Jay, and he leaned down. “You don’t need to give us anything, Mr. Walsh, but thank you for the thought,” he said softly. “You’re very kind.”

But the boy reached for the strip of fabric once Jay had separated it from his keys. “Is this really mine?”

Jay nodded. “All yours,” he said. “It’s good luck, so don’t lose it.”

A well-dressed woman carrying a microphone walked up to me. “What’s going on?” She looked at me, her eyes narrowed critically. “Is that Jay Walsh?”

I nodded. “He made a new friend,” I said as I pointed to the boy. “I think they have something in common.”

“That is so sweet. I can’t wait to get my crew over here! Wait until they see this!” the woman gushed, and it dawned on me that she must be a journalist.

Jay stood up with a frown on his face when he spotted the woman. He walked over towards us. “What’s all this?”

“You’re going to be on the news, and for once, it’s for something good!” the woman chirped excitedly. “Don’t you want all of your fans to see you helping out?”

Jay shook his head. “Don’t film me,” he said in a serious voice. “I don’t want to be known as the guy who’s doing good just to be on camera.”

“But wouldn’t this inspire your fans?”

“I’m not doing it,” Jay said in a gruff voice. “Have some damn respect for the tragedy that’s occurred here today.”

The journalist rolled her eyes and walked away in a huff, and I smiled up at Jay. I knew something now; one pure, indubitable fact.

This was definitely the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Jay

Even though I felt like dropping down on my knees in the exact second when I saw that Kate was alive, I knew that it wasn’t the right time for a proposal. Not by a long shot. With the plane crash and multitude of people thought to be dead, it would have been an utterly selfish, jackass move to propose. And as much as I didn’t want to admit it, I didn’t think Kate would want a big, public proposal. She was poised and outgoing, but I knew that she didn’t like being a spectacle.

It just wasn’t the right time.

By the time we left the airport, we were both exhausted. I was starving, but I felt guilty about being so hungry. All of those people grieving probably weren’t thinking about food, and I felt like I shouldn’t be, either. But after my stomach grumbled more than once when we were in the car, Kate turned to me.

“You don’t have to beat yourself up, you know,” she said softly. “We can get something to eat. I’m hungry, too.”

Without replying, I drove us towards that little Chinese food stall where we’d had one of our first conversations. Kate gave me a watery smile when I pulled up, but she didn’t say anything.

“I’ll slide out and pick us up some food, and then we can take it home to eat, sound good?” I said.

Kate nodded. “I wish I knew why I felt so tired,” she said softly. “I feel like I just ran a marathon.”

I’d had a game scheduled for later in the day, but I had to call my coach and tell him that I would be missing it. I’d never missed a match, not even for the most foul of hangovers, but today was something different. When I told my coach a short version of what had happened, he let me off the hook, scot free.

I loaded up with a variety of wontons, fried chicken, and vegetable dishes before heading back to the car, and Kate smiled when I slid behind the driver’s seat. It already felt final, like she was back for good.

“What are you going to do?”

Kate pursed her lips. “I’m not sure,” she said softly. “I don’t know what I should do. I emailed my producers and told them about what happened, and I don’t know if I’ll have to get on a plane to go back home or not.” She shuddered. “I hate the idea of flying right now, it seems so awful.”

“I don’t blame you,” I said as I reached over the seat and gripped her pale fingers in my own. “I don’t blame you at all. After what happened to my parents, I couldn’t get in a car for a year.”

“I’m so sorry about that, Jay,” she said, looking at me with pain in her eyes.

I nodded. “It was a bad time. But I’m glad I can talk to you about it. Thank you…for listening to me.”

“Always.”

We drove back to my flat in silence until Kate let out a strangled cry.

“Oh my god, Lizzy!” she said. “I totally forgot to call her! She’s probably a wreck.”

I widened my eyes. I’d been terrified earlier that Kate was dead, and I couldn’t imagine how fearful her sister had been. Even though Kate and Lizzy looked like opposites, I knew their sisterly bond ran deep.

“You’d better call her,” I said. “You know how she’s prone to overreacting.”

Kate nodded. It was the most normal interaction we’d had since I arrived back at the airport and saw her amazingly, stunningly
alive
.

“Lizzy, it’s me,” Kate said a moment later, presumably to Lizzy’s voicemail. “You’re probably in class right now, but I just wanted to let you know I’m okay. There was a plane crash, the plane I was supposed to take crashed into another plane as it was landing. Something about bad weather preventing visibility. But I didn’t get on the plane, and I’m not going back to the States.” Our eyes met and Kate’s cheeks colored. “At least not right now,” she added. “Call me. Love you.”

When Kate had hung up, she let out a deep sigh and reclined against the headrest. “It feels good to be here, with you,” she said softly. “I was dreading leaving, you know.”

I nodded. “I’m not playing in the game later,” I said. “I called my coach while you were getting some things together. He understood, but it’s probably a one-time-only exception.”

Kate let out a dry laugh. “The fans of Manchester United are going to kill me,” she said lightly. “For keeping their precious Jay Walsh from them.”

I grinned broadly. “You can keep me from whomever you’d like,” I said with a wink. “Just as long as I get a snog every so often.”

I carried Kate’s suitcase into my building while she carried the bag of takeaway food. The doorman smiled at us and let us into the elevator, and I noticed that even though Kate seemed to be relaxing as time went on, she was still tense.

“You okay?” I asked, squeezing her hand. “I know this kind of stuff can be traumatic.”

She nodded. “The only way I would have gotten on that plane was if Josh was chasing me,” she said in a dry voice. “And that just makes me think…well, I can’t help but wonder about my job. What’s going to happen?”

I shook my head. “No way of knowing,” I said as I reached over and ruffled her hair. “But everything will be fine, you’ll see.”

“I hope so,” Kate said. “It seems trivial to worry about now, after what happened today, but I can’t help it. I just spent so much of my working life on that show. To watch it go up in flames now would hurt a lot.”

I shrugged. “The media is fickle,” I said, remembering how my ‘fans’ lapped up every piece of shit journalism from Hannah. “I wouldn’t worry about it, or at least try not to.”

We set up a feast on the floor of my flat and turned on the news. I was relieved to see Kate eating—she looked wan—and admittedly, the food helped to calm my nerves. But the news wasn’t good; despite the best efforts of the rescuers, most of people on board the planes had died. I could only thank whatever god was listening to me that Kate hadn’t been on that plane.

There was a buzz and Kate and I both looked at our phones.

“It’s me,” she said. “Hold on.” I watched as she wiped her lips and composed her face into a professional mask. “Hello?”

I couldn’t hear the other end of the conversation, but it was fascinating to watch Kate’s face as she spoke. She had a colorful range of expressions and I loved seeing how animated she could be, even though the news perhaps wasn’t great.

“What happened?” I asked as soon as she’d hung up.

“That was one of my executive producers,” Kate replied. “He said the same things that Josh said, but at least he was nice about it.” She let out a long sigh, sending a stray strand of hair high into the air. “He told me that the ratings have fallen pretty sharply in the last three weeks while they’ve been airing the remaining episodes, and they think it’s because of that so-called scandalous piece your ex wrote about me. But he said he was holding off on telling me because he wanted to be sure.”

“And?” I raised my eyebrows. “Is he sure now?”

She shook her head. “I don’t think he has much of an idea,” she replied. “He said there’s a meeting with all of the producers at the end of the week, and then he’d get back to me and let me know. But….” She paused and let out a sigh. “But since I talked to Josh the way I did, it’s possible that he could sway everyone into voting against me. It was stupid for me to ever be involved with him.”

“I feel your pain, trust me. I never should have gotten involved with Hannah.” I said, rolling my eyes. “She’s tried to ruin my life more times than I can count. And yours, too, if I might add.”

“Yeah. Hey!” Kate suddenly said as she pointed towards the muted TV. “There we are!”

I groaned as I saw the caption beneath the footage: “Hunky Footballer Jay Walsh Steps In!” Reaching forward, I tried to turn the TV off, but Kate held up her hand.

“As disgustingly crass as it is for the reporters to cash in on you doing that,” she said. “It’ll do your reputation good, Jay. You could probably use that, to be honest, after that whole drug rehab scandal.”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m sure Hannah will find a way to twist it somehow,” I replied. “Just give her time. She’ll come up with something. She always does.”

“Well, at least she doesn’t have my career to trash anymore,” she said. She kept her voice light, but I was impressed with how she was dealing with things. I had a feeling that before she’d met me, she’d controlled her image tightly. This had to have thrown a wrench in her plans to have a spotless career, but she was taking it like a champ.

“Come here,” I said, patting a spot of floor next to where I sat. “I want to snuggle with my girlfriend.”

Kate smiled. “After the horrible day we’ve had, I like the sound of that,” she said as she lowered herself down and rested her head against my shoulder. “I like the sound of that a lot.”

***

The next few days were incredible. I barely let Kate out of my sight; she went back to Lizzy’s to drop off some of her things and reunite with her sister, but aside from that, we were together all the time. The season was almost over and when I finished, I’d be able to spend every morning with her. I was so excited—I felt like a little kid waiting for a holiday.

Even though I hadn’t been thrilled to see Kate and myself on the news, helping out at Manchester Airport, I couldn’t deny that she’d been right. It
was
good for my reputation—now all of the tabloids were calling me the “Hunky Helper” instead of whatever slang they could come up with after all of Hannah’s little articles. Even my coach was impressed—he’d slapped me on the back and told me I’d done a good job. My mates teased me, naturally, but after a stern look they calmed down.

“Shut up, you lot could do well to learn something from Jay,” Coach had snapped one afternoon when my mates couldn’t stop calling me Hunky Helper. I’d just grinned. It felt better than I’d expected it would to be recognized for something nice.

One morning, a few days later, Kate burst into the bathroom when I was in the shower. She grinned at me and tossed her hair back over her shoulders, and just the sight of her was enough to make my mouth go dry; after dating countless women over the years, somehow Kate managed to excite me every day. I wanted to spend the rest of my life staring at her, looking deep into her green eyes and wondering how I’d gotten so bloody lucky. 

“I got an email from the producers,” she said after knocking on the glass door of the shower. “I haven’t read it yet. Can you come sit with me?”

I nodded. “Of course,” I called. “I’ll be right out.”

Suddenly, my heart was pounding in my chest, and I grinned to myself. I couldn’t believe it—I’d never been nervous for another person before, and here I was.

Oh, well. As they say…there’s a first time for everything.