Playing His Game (The Reynolds Brothers) (26 page)

Josh: If that's
what you want.

Me: It is. I'm
celibate.

Why I just added
in my newfound celibacy is beyond me.

Josh: Well
that's just sad. Women as beautiful and sweet as you should not be celibate.

Me: And we're
back to just a movie

Josh: I can't
compliment you?

Me: No. I was
beautiful and sweet before too, but that didn't stop you from walking all over
me.

Josh: Ouch.
That hurt. Okay platonic dinner and a movie and I promise not to try and mess
with your celibacy.

Me: Good. Where
should I meet you?

Josh: The
Square. 6ish?

Me: See you
then

I shower and get
dressed, but since I have no real desire to even leave the house I throw on a
ratty pair of blue jeans and an old concert t-shirt. I pull my hair back in a
bun and I don't even attempt to put make-up on. Nothing can cover the mess that
is my face.

I'm actually not
that pretty when I'm dressed like a slob and make-up free. My curves make me
look plump and I can see all the small imperfections of my skin without
concealer on. My nose sticks out more too. My blue eyes might be able to
brighten up my face if my eyelids weren't still swollen. The icepack from
before was very little help.

Screw it. I don't
have any reason to impress Josh anyway so I shouldn't care how horrible I look.
My purse is still on the kitchen table from the night before so I grab it, toss
my phone inside and step outside my parents’ front door, locking it behind me.
When I turn around I almost fall flat on my butt.

Scott is sitting
on the second step leading up to my front door.

His head is in his
hands and he has a small brown duffle bag placed next to him. He looks up from
his hands when he hears me, and he looks... breathtaking. I mean, he looks like
shit, even worse than he did on TV yesterday, but the sight of him on my
parents’ steps is breathtaking.

Stop thinking that
way, Winnie. You hate him, remember?

"What are you
doing here?" I ask, still shocked he's sitting in front of me. He stands
up and dusts his hands off on his denim jeans. I watch as he adjusts his shirt
and then his piercing gray eyes meet mine.

"I rang the
doorbell a few times but I figured no one was home so I just sat on the steps
until someone arrived."

"How long
have you been here?"

"The cab
dropped me off around ten this morning."

It's almost six
now. He's been sitting out here in this summer heat for almost eight hours.

"Why are you
here? You shouldn't be here." I go to move past him so I can get to my
parents’ garage and drive their spare car, but he stops me. He places both of
his hands on my shoulders and turns me around to face him. Now I have no choice
but to look up at the face of the man I love and hate all at the same time.

"Yes, I
should. I should be wherever you are. It's you who shouldn't be here. You
should be back in California with me."

"Let go of
me, Scott. I have somewhere to be and you should go home."

"I am home.
My home is wherever you are."

My heart flutters
and I internally curse myself for being so gullible and falling for a line like
that.

"Me? I'm your
home? You could have fooled me."

"I fucked up.
I screwed up so bad and I let the best thing that ever happened to me get on a
plane and walk out of my life. I don't expect you to believe me and I know I
don't deserve you, but I love you, Winnie."

His words are
exactly what I've wanted to hear for so long. They’re exactly what I wanted him
to say several nights ago when I expressed my love for him, but he never said
it. Instead, he told me he cared about me. Why should I believe he loves me
now?

"You don't
love me. You're just freaking out because I left you. Is this an ego thing? Has
a girl never left you before?"

"Winnie,"
he whispers, moving one of his hands from my shoulders to cup the side of my
face. "It's not an ego thing. I have no ulterior motives. I. Love.
You."

He leans in and
brushes his lips against my forehead. I'm so stunned by his words that I don't
even stop him. His mouth moves down to my ear and he whispers again, "I
love you. I love you so much and I'm so sorry I screwed everything up. You mean
everything to me."

My body starts to
tremble and my eyes fill up with tears. I don't know if I'm happy he's finally
saying the words I've longed to hear or if I'm finally having a nervous
breakdown.

"Beauty,"
he moans and folds me into his arms, squeezing me tightly to his body.
"Don't cry, Winnie. I'm so sorry, but please, don't cry. I'll fix this.
I'll make this better.”

I continue to sob
and my eyes burn from the fresh tears. I haven't given my eye sockets enough
time to rest from the tears I shed the night before. I turn my head into
Scott's chest like I've done so many times before, and I let his chest and his
scent comfort me. I have no idea how much time passes but eventually my tears
stop falling and I move away from his body, wiping the fallen tears from my
cheeks.

"Who has
Sinatra right now?" I ask. My concern for her is suddenly all I can think
about.

"Jared took
her, Winn. She's in good hands. She's just waiting for us to come home to
her."

I feel a lot
better just knowing where she is.

"You look so
beautiful right now." His words have me laughing internally at how
ridiculous I must actually look and how blind he must be from love.

Wait. Do I
actually believe he might love me?

"Scott, you
did some really unforgivable things. The sacrifices I made for you, making that
movie to save you, I did that all because I love you. I thought you would
understand that, but the way you treated me in front of Jared and my sister...
there are no words for how you made me feel."

"I-" he
tries to interrupt but I don’t let him.

"I know I'm
not your girlfriend. I never claimed to be your girlfriend, but I thought I
still meant something to you. You wrote me off to them as if I was nothing. Do
you realize how far I went for you? What I gave up for you?"

I pause, giving
him time to speak now because I really have no clue what else there is to say.

"I do, Winn.
You gave up everything for me, to save me. That was the ultimate act of love,
but I didn't know how to handle it. I didn't know how to handle you and I
screwed it all up. Jared got under my skin and I said things I didn't mean.
You're right, you weren't my girlfriend because I don't deserve a girl as
amazing as you, but I want to. I want to deserve you because I am head over
heels in love with you, Winnie.

"I should
have never allowed you to make that video with me. I should have never made the
video, period. Knowing how you felt about me and how I felt about you, I should
have never been so okay with sleeping with another woman, but I honestly had no
idea you loved me. I honestly didn't think you and I had a fighting chance, but
now that I know that you love me I'm not going to let you go. I'm going to
fight for you for as long as it takes. I'm not going to screw this up, Winn.

"I'm going to
get help so I never jeopardize what we have again. I want to make a life with
you, Winnie Adams. I just hope you still give me the chance to."

I'm a blubbering
mess again. Seriously, how much can one person cry?

"What about
the last few days? I can’t just forget that, Scott. You didn't call me. You
didn’t text and then I see you out with Tawny and some girl, and doing
interviews on the news. You… you broke my heart."

"Winnie,"
he mumbles and his eyes start to gloss over. He runs a hand through his dark
hair, trying to compose himself. "I didn’t contact you because I was
trying to give you time. I thought you just needed time. I know I said some
pretty horrible things and I didn’t want to come talk to you before you were
ready. I know now how wrong I was. I should have called you. I should have
texted you. I should have fought for you, right away.

"As far as
the other stuff goes, it was just press, Winnie. Mandatory press I had to do
because I signed a contract saying I would do it. The picture of me leaving the
club? That was a mandatory appearance I had to make. I ignored everyone for the
hour I was there and the minute the hour was over I left. Tawny and some girl
she was hooking up with for the evening just happened to leave at the same
time. It only takes one photo to misinterpret the entire events of the night. I
went home right away and I was alone. I showered, snuggled up to Sinatra and
dreamt of you. You were all I thought about those few days."

He reaches into
the front pocket of his jeans and pulls something out. All I can see is
something silver shining in the gap of his fist.

"I found this
on the beach several months ago and thought of you like I always do when I see
shells. I'm always looking for the prettiest ones to bring to you. This one was
more than pretty. This one was unique. Almost as if it was man made. I took it
home that day but instead of giving it to you, I put it in my nightstand. I
wanted to find just the right time to give it to you."

He reaches for my
quivering hands and then places the item inside them. I look down and am
surprised at what I see. It's a necklace, handmade with a long silver chain.
Attached to the chain is a clamshell and it's in the shape of a heart. It's not
perfectly symmetrical and it has its flaws, but it's unmistakably in the shape
of a heart. It's off white with hints of faint pink and purple throughout.

"I found a
place down in Santa Monica that specialized in turning shells into jewelry by
adding personalization and chains. Last month I had this made when I was down
there with Jared. Turn it over, Winnie."

I look up at him
and then back down at my hands. Turning the shell over, I gasp at the words
that are etched into the shell.

Scott
+ Winnie

Forever

I look back up
into his eyes that are now glazed over with unshed tears. "What does this
mean?"

"It means I
love you, Winnie. I've known I loved you for a while, I just couldn't say the
words out loud for some reason. It scared the hell out of me and it took losing
you to finally be able to say them out loud. And Winnie? If you take me back I
promise to always say it. I'll say it over and over again because I love you so
much and a woman like you deserves to hear that as much as possible."

I may be the
stupidest woman on the planet, but I believe him. I believe everything he's
saying and as much as I know he deserves the hell he's in right now, I don’t think
I deserve the hell that pushing him away will put me through. I want to be
happy. I deserve to be happy and Scott makes me happy.

"Scott, if
you ever, and I mean ever, do anything like this to me again, we're through. I
don't deserve to ever be treated that way again and if it were any other man I
wouldn't even be giving him the time of day right now."

I step forward and
crush my body to his. My arms move up behind his head and I pull him to me,
crushing my lips to his. The salt from my tears is all I can taste, but his
lips are warm and inviting and I feel like I'm finally home in this kiss. He
was right about one thing though. I'm his home just like he's mine.

Scott breaks the
kiss and looks down into my eyes. "What does this mean?"

"This
means," I pause, trying to clear my head so I can speak clearly.
"This means you screwed up and I still hate you, but I love you more.
You're going to have to prove yourself to me. That may sound unfair, but I need
to know you mean everything you said today. I need to know that you love me and
that might take some time, but the last few days have been miserable. I've been
in an internal hell and I don’t want to be anymore. I want to be with you. I
love you."

“I love you, too,
Winn. So much. So, so much. You won't regret this. I'm going to sweep you off
your feet and never have you doubt me again, and-"

I cut him off with
my lips, no longer wanting to hear an apology or how he'll make this better. I
want to feel the connection I feel every time he touches me. Every time he
kisses me.

My arms wrap
around his body as his hands move under my ass and he lifts me up, twirling us
around on my parents’ steps. I wrap my legs around his waist and then break the
kiss, letting my forehead fall to his shoulder and rest there. I close my eyes
and breathe him in, glad that he's here and making everything better.

His nose nuzzles
against my head before he whispers, "I love you, Winnie."

I kiss his neck
and whisper, "I love you, too."

Epilogue

"This is
seriously the best night of my life, " I squeal, grasping onto Scott and
pulling him down for a kiss. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"

"Christ,
beauty, we just got here. Why don't you tell me how you feel at the end of the
night? You might hate it."

"How could
anyone hate a magical place like this?"

I scream that last
part and everyone laughs at my expense. This has been the best birthday ever.

Scott woke me up
this morning with breakfast in bed and after I ate the delicious meal he
prepared for me, he ate me. Twice.

We spent most of
the morning on the beach but then he told me to dress warm for my gift. It gets
chilly in Malibu at night so I didn't think anything of it. We hopped in his
truck and picked up Autumn and Jared on the way to wherever my gift was. I
thought it would be a short trip but it took two hours to get to our
destination. I was getting impatient until I saw the sign and my heart stopped.