Playing With My Heartstrings (16 page)

What had Luke seen? His near-girlfriend fleeing in a fit of tears, broken-hearted by a boy whom he'd never met or knew? Yeah, that would be one heck of a long story to explain, including a major fess-all about my non-existent romances which I dreamt of becoming a reality. As if.

Or, if luck had finally decided to be on my side, Luke might not have witnessed anything at all. That was a realistic probability which I couldn't bear to push aside and ignore. I could only pray that it was real.

But it wasn't meant to be.

"Sadie, are you alright?" Luke asked, a tentative edge clouding his tone.

I turned around, sniffing my blocked nose as though I'd just been run down with the annual winter flu, and was greeted with a look streamed with concern and alarm. My much-used intuition alerted that this was a situation that I couldn't get myself out of, whether I liked it or not.

Well, here goes.

"No, I'm not," I choked out, tears spilling out of my bloodshot eyes.

Luke gulped, abruptly nervous by my out-of-the-blue change in behaviour.

"I think we need to talk," he murmured, moving closer towards my shaking form.

I instantly agreed. "Yeah, there's a lot on my mind," I truthfully admitted, as my hand reached for Luke's, a burst of light warming the cool darkness I was walking in alone.

*********

"The waitresses here must be getting sick of serving us all the time," Luke joked, his third attempt at lightening the sullen atmosphere, gesturing towards the dumbstruck girls dreamily gazing at Luke around the coffee-clustered counter. "Still, I'd rather go nowhere else, if I had to be honest."

"Me too," was the sole response my muddled mind could achieve and I dully stared at the pale white table, which had an intriguing ketchup stain stuck in the middle. I sighed, grief washing over me and eternal misery the sole emotions I was able to see ahead of me.

There was no more denying it or running away from my heart's desires: thrills lit me up like a candle whenever I caught a glimpse of Joel's Californian-blonde hair or the very faint hint of a smirk, which left me utterly breathless. Sure, he was a game player and
explanations of his never made any sense, but he had definitely put his attractive looks to good use, whilst playing with my heartstrings. I was the clueless fool to have fallen for him and treated him like a saint, gushing over his apparent kindness and mannerisms, and blushing madly when we met up together.

Though he may not have known it, Joel cast a powerful spell upon me and unless I did something urgently, it would remain unbroken, heartbreak prominent wherever I travelled. It wasn't the perfect future I'd had in mind.

And what about sweet-as-warm-apple-pie Luke? Whether it was due to my surge in sugar levels by devouring a bowl of chocolate cereal each morning or perceptions were beginning to surface, my heart would twinge with another unknown feeling - a romance, maybe? - when I would wait by the park and Luke would stride towards me, his adorable freckles glimmering in the light and a playful look twinkling in the corner of his soft-as-butter eyes.

Luke was sweet, caring and the greatest person I could hang out with whenever life was dragging me down: I needed him and, in certain ways, Luke hinted that he was glued to my hip because he followed me wherever I went. Well, not everywhere, otherwise he would've been caught as a freaky stalker long ago, but he was like an eager-to-please puppy: he wanted nothing better than hear my each breath, listen to my every single opinion, laugh at my often poorly-told jokes and perhaps steal some of my chocolate cake, which made me feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Albeit without a Chanel bag.

Not even random-with-girls Joel, who'd wrapped me around his finger and led me on to believe that our love was real, would make me give up the fantastic friendship I'd formed with honourable Luke. As if I'd dare.

"Luke," I breathed, raising my voice from a peaceful whisper, "I-I haven't been fully honest with you about... some things and I need to tell you now before I lose my mind."

Apprehension flicked across Luke's seriously set expression. "Of course, Sadie, you can tell me anything," he reassured me, calmly, his flawless colours shining through.

I hesitated, painfully biting my lip, and gasped in need of fresh, cool air. Hm, had anybody noticed how hot it had become inside the cafe? The air conditioner had been switched on full-blast ever since Luke and I coolly strode in, nerves preventing me from daring to look at his face, but all of a sudden, I felt as though I was standing in the middle of the Sahara desert, the sun burning into my exposed skin without a breeze to offer any form of comfort. Panic was setting in...

"Before I met you, Luke, I'd been involved with s-s-someone else and it didn't, um, well -" I stumbled across my nerves, insecure of how get my point clearly across - "it didn't end the way I thought it would." I breathed a sigh of relief, majorly glad about having got past the important hurdle. "And I guess that I've been dealing with it since."

Stunned into an amazed silence, Luke never interrupted or made any gestures to give a piece of his overworked mind - he held a consistent strong gaze, engulfed with a burning intensity that nearly made my heart happily skip a beat, and never opened his mouth in a half-pout, half-goldfish look, waiting until I'd reached the end of my mini-speech and recovered from the draining vigour it had taken from my low energies.

"Who was this guy?" Luke whispered, then, with an out-of-place burst of humour, added, "Or girl?"

"What?" My eyes rolled backwards, astounded by Luke's question. "N-no, I was going out with a guy, Luke, in case I hadn't made my explanation clear." An amused snort cleared my sniffy nose. "Honestly, where did you get that idea from?"

"I just know how to push your buttons, that's all." Luke winked. "It sure comes in handy at times like these."

"Yeah, it sure does," I echoed.

"So, as I originally asked, who was this guy called? I might know him."

One of my unplucked mane of eyebrows arched into the air, curiosity gaining control over my initial panic. "And why would you know him?" I wondered.

"Um, I just know tons of guys, no big deal."

"OK." I nodded. "So, if I hear about one soft-as-cookie-dough catching up with a twice-baked-biscotti and sparks fly, you will tell me that you were involved, right?"

Luke cracked up, howling with amusement. "And why would you think that I'd have words with the guy in question?" he asked, perplexed.

I twisted my cross pendant with my fingers, awaiting the perfect moment to respond. "Because you care about me," I stated.

"Indeed I do."

That was all my awaiting ears longed to hear. It confirmed my suspicions of Luke's caring nature for me - who would do anything for me within a second, from placing a smile back on my face to climbing a mountain - and restoring my low morale, as everything went up the wall once the image of Joel freely snogging another model-beautiful girl blinded me from seeing the difference between Luke's friendly, heart-warming persona - whose cracking sense of humour and interests were on a par with mine - and Joel's laidback, yet way-to-casual traits were definitely not suited to my needs or anybody else's, really. Three words were all it took to make a once long-lost dream in an existence, and the euphoria was beyond what I'd imagined it would feel like.

Could it truly have been possible to feel lifted and low at the same time?

"Anyway, this guy -" I accentuated the pronunciation, the occasionally used word seeming completely alien to my outstretched lips "- had been in my life for a fairly long time. Wait, probably ever since I started school," I corrected, scatters of primary school memories founding my thoughts. "Yeah, I met him when I was about four years old."

"What's his name?" Luke queried.

"Joel," I answered, matter-of-factly. "Joel Henderson."

Luke put his fingers to his lips, concentration working his mind. "Hmm, I've never heard of him," he eventually said.

I smirked, amazed that Luke was still adamant about finding out whether he knew Joel or not. "Of course you haven't, Joel lives in another town to yours!"

"I have plenty of contacts on my phone - probably one of my mates has his number."

"Like who? A friend of a friend who you've only passed walking down the street?"

Luke paused. "Look, it doesn't matter anymore, honestly."

I pursed my lips and glanced at the black and white cat-designed clock hammered onto the cream wall, which stated the time as 2.15pm. Phew, at least Mum wasn't expecting me to arrive back home just yet.

"Um, what happened between this Joe guy -"

"He's called Joel, Luke -"

Luke returned with a weak eye roll, my world-renowned skill clearly having not rubbed off him, and continued, "So, what did you do with Joel?"

"Barely anything for around six years whilst I attended primary - my friends would joke about my crush on Joel, but it was only a minor thing - then feelings, well, sort of developed once high school started." Embarrassment evidently flared in my cheeks, as the cafe unexpectedly transformed into a humid rainforest, sweat stickily trickling down my back.

Weirdly, Luke appeared to share a bit of my mortification, albeit to a lesser extent, and he fidgeted with his fingers, wishing he was sitting somewhere cooler and happier. He might as well have read my mind, too.

"Did Joel know?"

I shook my head. "Even if he did, he never showed the slightest hint of affection, only greeting me awkwardly at school proms or saying 'hi' to me if I bumped into him at the Game store." A grimace blackened my expression. "But it didn't stop me from daydreaming about going on a date with him or sharing that first kiss..." Uh oh. I'd got carried away on that one.

Luke glowered, his cheeks brightening to an angered shade of red, and muttered an expression that my ears luckily didn't catch wind of. As always, words spilled out of my talkative lips before realization showed itself, denying me the opportunity to prevent creating a dramatically-created mess. Clean-ups were a chore that Mum never asked me to do; the same applied for relationships as well.

"And then it happened," Luke said, without questioning it.

"Yes," I replied. "Though not in the way I'd hoped."

Luke was dumbfounded. "What do you mean?"

I shied away from his question, pondering on the wisest response in the hope I'd avoid another heated glower.

"Well?"

"Um," I nervously mumbled, nausea rolling in my sickened stomach, "a few weeks ago, Joel asked me whether I wanted to go camping with him in here and I said yes, I would."

A loud guffaw, muffled by his hands covering his smirking mouth, was the last emotion that I was expecting Luke to experience until I'd realized that my words came out in a manic jumble. Oops.

"Honestly, Sadie, I can't see how you would've been legally allowed to set up a tent and roast marshmallows behind the counter!" Luke snickered, lightly banging his fist upon the table, sending a wobbly quake through our unstable chairs.

A grin eventually won me over and I smiled in spite of myself, until Luke calmed down and gave me an expectant look, clearly awaiting the rest of my explanation. Oh well, laughter couldn't last forever, I supposed.

"Actually, I meant that Joel asked me whether I wanted to go with him whilst we were hanging out here," I corrected, "and since this was the first time that he'd ever asked me to go out with him, I felt inclined to say yes. I would've beaten myself up if I didn't," I included, revealing my deepest thoughts.

All traces of humour drained from Luke's face, only leaving behind a scowl as hard as a rock solid statue, without the faintest sign of compassion.