Present Perfect (37 page)

I slowly headed back to the table and my blind date, Joshua McPherson. Awesomeness does not run in Lisa’s family. He’s smug, arrogant, and boring. I tried, but couldn’t walk any slower back to the table. As I approached, Joshua was berating the waiter for something stupid and pointless. I had determined that Joshua must have a tiny dick and is overcompensating by being an asshole to all the employees of this very expensive and pretentious restaurant.

Sitting down, I made eye contact with our waiter, trying to convey my apologies for Joshua and to signal him to bring Cosmo number three STAT. The one thing that’s been a positive this evening is that I have been able to drink, even though I’m two years from being legal. I guess when you have money like Joshua apparently has, you get away with a lot of things. I call it the Lohan effect and right now, I could kiss Lindsey for making this public buzz possible.

Twenty minutes had passed and I was beyond bored and pissed. Noah had not replied to my 911. Brooke had gone out of town for the holiday so I knew she wasn’t the reason for the no reply. I look across the table at Joshua as he told me something about the blah, blah and its blah, blah. I heard someone beside me clear their throat. I looked up and there he was, my knight in plastic armor.

He was dressed in a gray suit, a light blue shirt that made his eyes look even bluer, and a gray and silver pinstripe tie. He looked gorgeous.

“Excuse me, but don’t I know you?” I just sat there stunned, wondering what he was up to. “Noah Stewart,” he said, pointing at himself.

“Oh, yeah Noah Stewart from...”

“Middle school.”

“That’s right, middle school.” I turned to Joshua. “Joshua McPherson, this is Noah Stewart from middle school.”

Joshua stood extending his hand. Noah grabbed it and shook it rapidly. “Nice to meet you, Josh.”

“It’s nice meeting you, too. It’s Joshua, by the way.”

“Huh?”

“My name is Joshua, not Josh, Joshua.” Noah just stared at him as Joshua sat back down.

My Cosmo haze was nice and thick at this point. I just smiled, looking back and forth between the two guys. I knew things were about to get fun now that my knight was here to rescue me.

“So…” Noah looked at me confused, like he had forgotten my name. Since Halloween 1996, Noah has called me Tweet. I have not heard him say my actual name since the age of six.

“A-man-da,” I said, trying to help him out.

“Yeah, that’s right. It’s great to see you,” Noah said.

“It’s great to see you, too. What are you doing here?” I asked.

“Well, I was supposed to meet some friends here for drinks and dinner. I just got a call, something came up and they can’t make it.”

“I’m sorry your plans got cancelled.”

“Yeah, me too. I hate to eat alone and being that I don’t live in town anymore, I really don’t know too many people. Lost track of friends. You know how it is. Well, it was great running into you.” Noah turned to Joshua and reached out to shake his hand. “Great meeting you, Joshua.”

I gave Joshua a pitiful look and then turn to Noah. “Noah, why don’t you join us? Joshua wouldn’t mind.” I glanced over at him. “Would you?”

Joshua had a stunned look on his face as he stammered out, “Uh…no, not at all. Please, join us.” He snapped his fingers at a passing waiter. “Get us another chair. The gentleman will be joining us.”

“Thanks man. I really appreciate it,” Noah said, excitedly.

The waiter returned with the extra chair. Noah positioned himself between Joshua and I. There was an awkward silence for a moment. I had no idea where Noah was going with this little charade, but he had a mischievous twinkle in his eye. I was filled up with liquor and along for the ride.

Grinning like a fool, Noah looked back and forth between me and Joshua. Finally, he landed his eyes back on me. “So, how do you two know each other?” Noah asked.

Glancing over at Joshua, I answered, “We’re actually on a blind date.”

“Oh hell, this is a date?! You two are on a romantic date and I’m crashing it. I’m an idiot. I’m sorry. Look, I’m going to leave and...”

I grabbed his arm as he started to get up. “NO! I mean, please stay. We really want you to stay. Don’t we, Joshua?”

“Sure. Stay. Please.”

“Well, if you insist.”

He settled back into his chair, grabbed a breadstick from the basket in the middle of the table, and took a big bite. There was another minute of awkward silence.

I took a sip of my Cosmo and got the party started. “So, Noah, where are you living now?”

“Saskatchewan.”

It took every bit of strength I had to contain my laughter, which caused me to choke on my drink.

“Saskatchewan, you say?” I looked over at him and smirked, still trying to control myself.

Noah returned my smirk “Yep, Sas…kat…che…waaan.”

I looked over at Joshua, who still appeared dazed and confused that our date had been hijacked.

“Saskatchewan,” I said.

From the look in his eyes, I could tell Joshua’s fog was starting to lift. “What do you do in Saskatchewan, Noah?” Joshua asked.

“I work on portfolios.” Our waiter came over to fill our water glasses and I motioned to him to bring me another Cosmo.

Joshua perked up at the mention of portfolios and appeared genuinely interested. “Oh, great. I’m an investment banker at Smith, Barney & Kline. What type of portfolios do you specialize in? Aggressive? Defensive? E-Commerce?”

The waiter arrived with my drink, placed it in front of me, and stood there while I drained the last drop of my previous Cosmo before taking my glass away.

“Pleather,” Noah answered.

“Excuse me?”

“Pleather.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t understand,” Joshua said, confusion plastered across his face.

At this point I’m trying desperately to hold back tears and a mouthful of liquor.

“I make portfolios out of pleather. You know, fake leather. I used to work in vinyl but nowadays everyone wants to look so sophisticated.”

“The fuck you say!” I blurted out. “Noah makes pleather portfolios in Saskatchewan. Isn’t that fan-fucking-tastic, Josh?”

Noah sat back in his chair, grinning from ear to ear.

Our dinner arrived and we ate while Noah enlightened us about the history of Saskatchewan and pleather. I had no idea if what he was telling us was true or not, but it sounded convincing.

After dinner, the three of us walked out the restaurant together. I was feeling pretty happy by then. I held on to Noah’s arm as Joshua handed his ticket to the valet. Noah turned to Joshua, extending his hand.

“Thank you for dinner. I wish you had let me pay for at least half.”

“Don’t worry about it. It was my pleasure.”

“Just so you know, I’m not the kind of guy who puts out just because you bought me dinner.” I almost lost it. Joshua looked at Noah with confusion, again. “I’m just screwing with ya, dude.”

Joshua laughed in that fake way when you don’t get the joke, but don’t want people to know that or how much of a dweeb you really are.

Looking at me, Noah asked, “Do you still live on Sycamore Drive?”

“I believe I do,” I said, proudly.

“Joshua, where do you live?”

“Beechwood Street on the Isle of Palms.”

“That’s in the opposite direction of Sycamore. It will take you about an hour and some change to get back home. Listen, I’m headed that way. Let me take her home for you.”

Stammering, Joshua said, “Uh…that’s okay. I’m fine taking her back home.”

“No, let me do it as a thank you for picking up the check. I insist. I won’t take no for an answer.”

Looking at me Joshua asked, “Uh…are you fine with that?”

“Fine by me, puddin’ pop,” I slurred, slightly.

“Okay, if you’re fine.” Joshua stared at me as the valet pulled up in his BMW.

“Your rides up, Josh,” Noah said.

“It was nice meeting you, Amanda. I’ll call you.”

“Okie dokie.”

Joshua leaned in, giving me a quick kiss on my cheek. There was one more moment of awkward silence before he got in his car and drove away.

Once the BMW was out of sight, Noah snaked one of his arms around my waist and pulled me abruptly against his chest. I place both hands on his muscular biceps to brace myself. My body aligned with his perfectly. Our lips were close, and I couldn’t take my eyes off of his. If I were to stick my tongue out just a little bit, I would be able to graze his bottom lip.

A low sultry voice interrupted my fantasy when Noah said, “Tweet.”

“Mmmhmm?”

He stared at my lips for a moment. Between the Cosmos and the feel of his body pressed against mine, I was feeling all kinds of tingles in all kinds of places.

“Do you think Joshua will call us for a second date?” I watched as his lips slowly turned into a sensual smirk.

I burst out laughing. “I doubt it since you wouldn’t put out.” I threw a wink and a smile his way.

“Bastard! Men are such pigs,” he said as he spanked my ass, causing me to jump and yelp a little.

The valet pulled up in the car. Taking my hand, Noah led me towards the passenger’s side and helped me in. He rounded the front of the car and slid into the driver’s seat. Holy moly, his ass looked incredible sliding into that seat. Before he started the car, I placed my hand on top of his thigh and squeezed slightly.

“Thank you for tonight. It was the best blind date in the history of blind dates.” I shyly smiled.

He picked up my hand, brought it to his lips, and placed a soft kiss on my palm, keeping in constant eye contact with me. It made me shudder. I had to squeeze my legs together tightly. The tingles were quickly turning into vibrations.

He placed my hand back on his thigh and smirked at me. “Pleather portfolio making Noah from Saskatchewan knows how to show his number one girl a good time.” He threw a wink my way.

I wanted to jumped across the seat, straddle him, and suck on his tongue and other body parts. I wouldn’t do it, of course. Nope, we were in the friend zone and I wouldn’t jeopardize that. Besides, he was with Brooke and I was with…what’s his name. This was the way it was supposed to be all along. Noah and I dating other people while remaining best friends, even though I still wanted to suck on his bottom lip.

In the immortal words of Sally Brown (Charlie’s sister), “All I want is my fair share. All I want is what’s coming to me.” Words to live by.

I knew it was cold from the cloud of smoke that escaped my mouth whenever I exhaled. I certainly couldn’t feel the cold. I couldn’t feel anything. I was still in that stage where you know intellectually what’s happening to you, but you haven’t allowed yourself to feel it yet. I sat at our spot staring out across the pond thinking of nothing and everything. Somehow my life had changed, turned upside down in a matter of minutes and I never saw it coming.

I heard the crunch of the gravel behind me. My phone had been blowing up with calls and texts from my family. None of them knew where I had run off to. If they knew I was literally three blocks away from them, they’d be furious. I wasn’t surprised that he knew exactly where to find me. I heard more gravel crunching as he rounded the picnic table I was sitting on top of. They replaced the one Noah demolished several months ago. He moved closer to me, neither one of us said a word. I continued to stare across the pond.

“Tweet,” he said. His voice was low and shaky.

He moved in closer, getting ready to wrap his arms around me. I leaned away from him and held my hand up, palm out, signaling him to stop.

“Don’t touch me.”

“Why?”

“Because, if you touch me, I’ll fall apart. I’ve already pulled myself back together once today. I don’t think I could do it again.”

I could see out the corner of my eye he was texting someone, probably my family letting them know he found me. I knew he wouldn’t tell them where I was, so I didn’t protest.

He sat down next to me, but kept a safe distance so we wouldn’t be touching. We sat in silence. Noah knew I would talk when I was ready.

I let my thoughts drift back through the last few months. I started with the beginning of school. It was a good semester. I made the Dean’s list, I was getting used to being away from home, I loved my roommate, and I got Noah back.