Punished Into Submission (29 page)

Why?

I know why. Because my walls have fallen too far and now the feelings are coming in, and I don’t like it. But I did. I like that I feel safe with someone, and that I know he would never hurt me like everyone else. He cares about me I can feel it, and the strange thing is, for once I do not want to push him away.

“What are you doing to me, Hunter?” I roll over, and snuggle deeply into my oversized bed.

I pray nothing haunts my dreams tonight when I am alone. I close my eyes thinking about images of Hunter and his soft smile.

~*~*~*~*~*~

I
’m sitting alone in the car waiting. I’m waiting for him to come out and take me home so my parents don’t have anything else to be pissed off about. My mother hates me as it is, for taking away the man she claims to love that isn’t my father. The passenger door opens and he climbs in, handing me a small bag. The white powder is obvious and I throw it on the dash.

“What the fuck? Don’t do that to my shit, you dirty little slut.” He reaches out and takes the small bag and puts it in his pocket.

“I’m sorry, sir.” I whisper looking out the window into the fading light.

“You fucking will be, bitch.” He yells, planting his foot on the accelerator.

I’m planted back in my seat. The speed we travel is dangerously high. Adrenaline runs wild through my veins and I wonder if this is what it feels like to be high on speed, cocaine even. In less than five minutes we pull up at the park around the corner from my house. He leans over and undoes my belt, his hands thread through my hair, pulling it hard, and my head falls back.

“I want you to say sorry to my cock for what you did.” His breath is on my cheek when he speaks to me.

He forces my head down to his crotch and I hold back the sob that threatens to escape. I want him to stop and love me like I know he does. But the only way he stops is when I say those words he wants to hear.

“I’m sorry.” I say, sucking back that whimper.

“Good girl, Kat.” he lets my hair go and pushes me back. The force makes me hit my head on the window. “Do you still love me, baby girl?’

“Yes, I still love you.” I say, reaching for the door handle.

“Wait.” He pulls on my arm and I turn to face him. “I want to know that when I come back you will be here waiting for me. I can’t live without you and you know you’re special to me.”

I nod.

“Answer me.” he raises his hand in a flash and I know better than to piss him off.

“Yes, sir I will wait for you.” It’s a mumbled answer but audible.

“No one will ever love you like I do, Katie, no one. You hear me?” his tone is loud and aggressive.

“Yes, sir. I hear you.”

“You’re never enough, you get it?” the words he speaks slice me, but they’re true.

“I’m never enough.” I repeat.

“Good, now fuck off.” he puts the car in gear and starts to reverse before I’m even out of the car. I practically fall out and lay on the ground as I watch it speed away.

I make my way home, pulling my jacket tight around my body. It’s way too big for me but I picked it up from one of the guys who stopped by last week to fuck my mother so she could get her drugs for the week. I cautiously walk through the back door and lock it as quietly as I can. I tip toe down and hall and into my room, praying that no one hears me. I climb into bed without getting undressed; it’s so fucking cold outside and I all I have is a thin, twenty year old sheet on my bed covering the stained mattress. I close my eyes and cry. Cry for the man who I have loved since he first walked through the door to score drugs from my dad. My mother also said she loved him one minute longer. He was twenty years younger than her but she didn’t care. She hated that someone could love me, when she never could.

I hear the smashing of glass and jolt awake. My dad yells at my mother and she is screaming for help. I get out of bed against better judgement and head into the kitchen. My mother is on the floor in a ball crying, while my dad sits on the kitchen chair, his face in his hands. I walk over to my mother and try to get her off the ground. She fights me like she always does, lashing out at me with her hands and feet. She’s high. She’s always high.

“Fuck off and leave me alone. Don’t touch me!” she screams.

“Let me help you up, I will help you into the shower.” I say, trying to get her on her feet again.

“Leave me alone, this is your entire fault you whore, you did this!” She continues to scream.

I let her go and watch her fall helplessly to the floor in a heap. She looks up at me and sobs and I feel sorry for her. I want to help her but she won’t let me. I jump when my dad’s fists connect with the table and turn.

“Just leave her alone. She doesn’t want your help; she can suffer like you do.” he yells, pointing to my mother who is crawling towards my feet.

“But I want to help her; I want to take away her pain.” I look from my father to my mother and back again. The black under mother’s eyes tells me she hasn’t slept in days.

“Let her feel the pain, Katie. She fucking deserves it.”

“No one deserves to be in pain, everyone deserves to feel love and be cared for.” I point to her when I speak; my voice starts to get louder.

“Love is for the weak.” He roars, making me jump. “It’s dangerous and carnal. That boy you fell in love with is going to break your heart and you know it. He is filth.”

“He loves me, and I love him.”

“No, you stupid girl, you don’t love him.” he stands up and smashes his fists against the table again, cracking the wood. “You only love the pain he causes.”

“That’s not true.” I scream, the tears streaming down my face.

“It is true and the sooner you believe it the better you will be. Pain is what keeps you going, the biting into your flesh and cutting into your heart. It’ll consume you and when you wake up from it, you will be damaged and fucked up like the rest of us.”

“Run, Katie. You fucking run and become unbreakable. Become invincible, strong, powerful and more dangerous than life now. Because when it catches you, you better be able to fight it.”

I wake with a jolt when rough, edgy hands touch my body.

I moan.

The feeling of another body jerks me awake. I roll back and see the shadow. Its dark, but I can roughly make out the person next to me. My heart is pounding in my chest from the nightmare that invaded my slumber. For a moment, I think I want to be sick.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, trying to sit up.

He doesn’t allow me to. He pulls me tight against his body, rubbing his nose against my exposed throat.

“I hate you. I hate you so much.” He moans, as his teeth sink into my flesh.

It’s painful, yet tasteful. He knows I like this, just as much as he likes doing it. He marks me; I know it. Since he can’t collar me, the next best thing to him is marking my skin claiming me for his own.

“I want to hurt you, but I don’t trust myself right now.” As he speaks, I can smell the rich branded scotch on his breath.

“You don’t want to hurt me, you only think you do.” I whisper, rolling my head so I can see him.

Hunter brings his mouth to mine, licking the roof of my mouth, before our tongues collide in a passionate kiss. He tastes of scotch and arousal. I love it. I love it when he shuts me up with a hard kiss that leaves me breathless, trembling, wanting more.

As he continued to claim me with his mouth, his hands roam my naked body. He slides his arm under my body so I am basically lying on his arm. While one hand cupped my breast, his other went straight to my sex. His hand grabbed my thigh roughly, before placing it over his hip, exposing me to his skillful hands. His other hand pinched and rolled my nipple until it was a hard, painful peak.

“I can’t stop touching you, yet all I want to do is leave you here, alone.” He speaks, into my mouth.

“Don’t leave me, stay with me.” I bring my hand up, threading it through his hair, and holding on so he doesn’t leave me.

I’ve become that needy bitch, who doesn’t want to be alone, but I wouldn’t pick anyone else to be that needy bitch with right now. I can feel how much he needs me, and it’s just as much as I need him.

“What were you dreaming about?” Hunter’s fingers continue to tease and test my body.

“Nothing.”

“Bullshit, I could hear you practically sobbing in your sleep.” He rubs my clit with his thumb, while the other continues to tease my nipples.

“Please, don’t.” The whole dream floods my mind as I fight those forming tears.

Hunter moves his body so he is lying on top of mine. My hands roam his naked chest as his fingers drive into my aching core. I buck under him when his finger goes from my pussy to my tight ass. He rubs his finger over the sensitive area over and over again, spreading the moisture around it. I tense slightly when he inserts one finger, pushing it in then pulling it all the way out. He repeats this several times until I’m a moaning mess beneath him.

“I have been thinking about you the whole time I have been gone. And this,” Hunter takes out one finger and replacing it with two, sending me into a spiral, “Is what I have been fanaticising about, taking you here.”

“Oh god.” I moan louder as my orgasm takes me by surprise. It’s short, sweet and has me shaking in my imaginary boots.

Hunter positions his length at my cunt and pushes himself inside of me just as I come down from my mini Hunter high. He starts off slow but picks up the pace sending me into another world. He holds his weight on one hand, while his other massages my overly sensitive clit. I buck against his hand wanting more or less friction; I haven’t worked it out.

Hunter stops his thrust in a sudden move and pulls all the way out. He positions himself at my tight hole and I tense.

“Relax.” He whispers, rubbing the throbbing tip over and over.

I blow out a breath and relax. He uses his hand for guidance as he pushes into me slowly. I bite my lip through the first initial pain. He pulls back slightly taking the tip all the way out before pushing back in again. He does it several times as I get used to the feeling. Hunter is hung...His gentleness in this situation surprises me. I meet his gaze in the dim light, his eyes hood with pleasure.

“Hush.” He moans, as I start to moan loudly.

“Jesus, fucking, Christ.” It flows off my tongue so well when I say it.

“Hush, baby.”

“Hunter.” I moan loudly when he picks up the pace.

Leaving one of my hands on his chest, I venture the other one towards my throbbing clit. I rub it soft at first, wanting the tiniest of pleasure.

“That’s it, play with yourself.” Hunter grunts, his eyes drifting to where my fingers rub harder and faster.

I try to hold out as long as I can, but I can’t hold the flow of emotion filled pleasure much longer.

“I need to come, let me come.” I say, just as my orgasm takes over my body.

I feel like I’m soaring in the sky. The light of the day is flashing but the stars are also there. Its subspace. That place where I can be anywhere I want and when I turn, its Hunter I see flying with me. I scream his name, over and over as I fall. My body is shuddering beneath him as he falls too. I can feel my nails digging in and racking down his skin as I continue to explode with ecstasy. The fear of falling is so great, but the fear of not being caught is terrifying.

T
he next few days are a blur. Hunter is busy working on a deal with buying another church to open up another club in Australia, so I don’t see him much during the day. At night however, I wake up several times and can feel him watching me. I haven’t had a nightmare since the one a few nights ago when Hunter came home and I was grateful. To say it didn’t freak the shit out of me would have been a lie.

I bring up several cases of wine up from the cellar and put them on the bench. David is in his usual spot at the end of the bar hugging his Gin and glass. I smile as I walk past him and he raises his near empty glass in my direction. Angel is standing on the stool, packing the top shelf of liquor for the fourth time this week. I have come to the conclusion; too many people have too much money in this part of the woods.

Arrow and Hunter walk through the bar and into his office, laughing loudly over the boxing match they had earlier today. Of course Hunter beat the shit out of Arrow and he is now sporting a bruise that matches Rumbles’. We sat on the sidelines cheering like idiots as two grown men beat the shit out of each other for fun.

I pull out the knife and cut open the top of the box. I tuck it back into my pocket before opening the carton and pulling out the bottles one by one. I pass a few to Angel before I pack the remaining ones into the store cupboard below the bench. I cleaned out the store cupboard when Hunter was away because I was sick of running down to the cellar every five minutes for new stock.

I bend down and pack the store cupboard, grabbing a bottle off the shelf, one at a time.

“I’m just ducking to the toilet, Kat. Will be five minutes tops.” Angels says, hopping down off the stool.

“Don’t forget to wipe.” I call after her, making her giggle all the way.

I laugh to myself as I continue to store the extra wine. It takes another two minutes and I’m grateful because my back is starting to kill me. I pack the finally bottle and do a quick count to make sure I will have enough for tomorrow night’s party.

“I couldn’t miss that ass even if I tried.” A familiar voice came from behind me.

I stood up and turned, slightly catching myself off balance. The shattering of a glass sounded from the end of the bar and I didn’t dare look.

“What...” The words didn’t come.

“Hello, Kat.”

“What... how....” I choke.

“I’ll take a Scotch. Make it an expensive one,” he says, sitting down on the stool.

I see David out the corner of my eye and I remember hearing the glass shatter. I look at him and he’s leaning over the bar checking out the broken glass on this side.

“Are you okay?” Angel asks him when she walks back in and sees the glass on the floor.

“Fine, love,” he says, the sweat covers his forehead.