Pure Redemption (Tainted Legacy) (13 page)

He led the way inside. An open arch acted as entrance into the sanctuary. At one time, double doors swung from it but they, like the pews, windows and anything else of possible value had been pulled out.

Gabe led the way through the arch, their feet scuffing the
ir
way through the dust.

“This is it?” he asked as he moved further inside. His voice echoed through the emptiness, bounced off the high ceiling.

“This is it,” Ava said in a shaky voice.

They were standing in the middle of the floor. It was the area that had crumbled but when she’d returned days later, it
was inexplicably undamaged.

Gabe craned his head, taking in every inch of the space. The ceiling. The corners. The altar.

He finally glanced back at her again. She stood with her teeth clenched, her eyes glassy and huge.

“You’re shaking,” he finally noted.

She bit her lip and managed a nod.

Without another word, he pulled her into him. His arms went around her and
she managed to tamp down a sob as she found comfort burying herself into his chest.

“It’s okay,” he whispered into her hair. “Don’t you feel it?”

“Feel what?” she asked, worriedly. He had told her that being in the church had not bothered him. Was it just because his mind was such a mess that first night? Had he not realized it?

“It’s peaceful here,” he finally said. “There’s a sense of rightness about it.”

“Peaceful?!” Ava grated out, taking a step backward and feeling a sudden sense of loss when Gabe’s arms fell away. “You
died
here!”

“Did I?” Gabe asked
with raised eyebrows. “Because
here I am.”

Ava stared at him for several long moments. “You’re right. You didn’t die. Not really.” She remembered the convers
ation with Grier;
she had reminded Ava that no one ever really died. “But you
are
different.”

Gabe’s face hardened almost imperceptibly. “Well, obviously.”

“I didn’t mean it like that. It’s more than just your lack of memory. What I meant was that before, you couldn’t be in a church. Now you can. Your scars, the ones on your back, are gone.”

“But I have a new one,” he reminded her.

“Yes,” she agreed, “you do.”

“So just how different am I?” he asked her. “I mean, other than my scars being different. And now I can be in a church.”

“And you can touch me,” Ava reminded him. “I mean you can touch me when I’m wearing this.” Her hands flew to her neck and he nodded. “You used to be able to feel other people’s emotions but you’ve already told me you can’t do that anymore.”

“I can’t,” he said
somewhat defensively
, as if worried she didn’t believe him.

“It’s almost like you’re human,” Ava said with a small, forced laugh. He
couldn’t
be human.

Could he?

Her heart took off racing at the thought. If he
was
human? What would that mean for them? At the end, that last day, he had told her they didn’t have a future together because they were too different. And yet, he had promised to love her forever.

“Do you think?” Gabe asked,
dipping
into her thoughts.

“Think what?” she had to ask, having gotten too sidetracked by her memories.

“That I’m human?” he wondered with eyebrows raised.

“Maybe,” she cautiously said but then an unwanted memory
settled into her head. “Except
the day Molly and Julia were over, when you cut yourself with the razor…you healed almost right away.” She thought that over. “But sometimes, razor cuts seem a lot worse than they are. Maybe you really didn’t heal as quickly as I thought. Maybe they just weren’t bad to begin with.”

He shrugged
. “I know a way we can find out.” H
is hand dove into his pocket. When he withdrew it, sparks seemed to fly from the violet and cerulean stones. Ava shrieked as she stumbled backwards, landing hard on her backside on the dusty floor.

Gabe was at her side instantly, his arms around her as he pulled her back onto her feet. “What happened?” he demanded.

“
Th-that
!” Ava stammered in accusation. She backed away and frantically pointed at the switchblade that had gone sliding across the floor when Gabe had dropped it to fall to her side. “Where did you get it?” she cried.

“That?” Gabe asked, sounding confused
. “It was in my pocket. It was the only thing I had with me the night you found me. I don’t know why, but I like to keep it with me. Why? Is that a problem?”

A single tear dripped down Ava’s cheek and she hurriedly wiped it away. “That’s the blade you used that night. It was Grier’s.” The last time Ava had seen it, it had been fully imbedded in his chest.

When he’d pulled it from his pocket, she’d thought the stones had sparkled to life. Now that it was lying on the dusty, grimy floor, it looked far more benign. Perhaps they’d just caught a few rays of sunshine.

She warily watched Gabe as he retrieved it.

“Why didn’t you tell me you had it?” she demanded. Her voice came out sounding far more accusatory than she’d intended.

“Was I supposed to?” he wondered, sounding genuinely surprised.

“It would’ve been nice to know,” Ava ground out.

He held out his hands in helpless defense. “I didn’t know you’d want to know!”

“I’m sorry,” she whimpered as she pinched
the bridge of
her nose between her thumb and forefinger. “It just surprised me.” Her chest rose and fell heavily as she fought to steady her breathing.

“Ava?” he waited until she looked at him before continuing. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t keeping it from you. I just didn’t know it was important.”

She nodded, unable to say anything as her eyes followed the movement of Gabe’s hand. The stones continued to sparkle and they were beautiful in a terrifying way.

“So, what were you going to do with it?” she asked, trying to move on.

“This,” Gabe said as he lifted the blade to his palm.

Ava screamed as she lunged at him. “No! Not in here! I’ve told you what happened the last time you spilled your blood in this church!” She looked around frantically. No sigils were visible but that didn’t mean anything. Last time she hadn’t seen them either. Not right away, at least.

“Okay,” Gabe said, sliding his arms around her again. She was upset, trembling once more, and it was clearly his fault. Again. And while he felt like he should not have the power—that he didn’t
deserve
to have the power—to make her feel better, he knew he did. He kissed the top of her head and she whimpered, almost imperceptibly into his chest as her arms looped around him. “Ava,” he finally said, “I need to do this. But we can do it outside.”

She nodded and released his waist but latched on to his hand
once more
. She followed him out of the door, through the grass until they were back up on the gravel road. She leaned against her car, steeling herself for what she knew was to come. Part of her did not want to watch but really there was no choice, she could not tear her gaze away.

Gabe didn’t even wince as he sliced the blade through the fleshy part of his palm, the meaty area below his thumb. Blood began to pour. He gazed at his hand with morbid curiosity.

Despite her knees feeling tingly and weak, she managed to rummage around inside of her car, looking for stray napkins. She found a few and handed them to him. He wiped the excess blood away and when he did, she couldn’t help but note how deep the gash was.

They waited in silence but not for very long. When Gabe finally pulled the clump of napkins away, the blood had stopped
flowing
. His wound
,
though still evident
,
had clearly begun to heal.

“It looks like I’m not human,” he said with a
scowl.

Ava shook her head. “But I don’t think your Nephilim either, Gabe. I really don’t. At least, not Nephilim like you used to be.”

He was silent before voicing what they were both silently wondering. “Then what am I?”

Chapter
10

After the few, sweet moments Gabe had given her in the church, she had been hoping that even if he couldn’t remember the past that maybe at least they could move forward. But once they had left, the unspoken policy of not touching had fallen back into place. She wasn’t sure exactly how, or why, it just had.
The conclusion she had come to was that Gabe felt obligated to comfort her when he felt it was needed. But offering comfort and actually wanting to
put your arms around someone a
re very much not the same thing.

He’d become withdrawn and Ava wasn’t sure what to do to help him. Seeing his old house, the radio station and lastly, Rafe, had thrown him into a sullen mood. At the start, he’d been openly frustrated but his mood seemed to worsen with each passing day.

They had barely left the house except for when Ava had to work. Gabe had grudgingly accompanied her. She was sure she wouldn’t be able to convince him to do this much longer and while there had been no further memory lapses, she couldn’t get over the fear of losing him to one.

Gabe had been adamantly disagreeing, trying to assure her he didn’t think it was an issue but Ava was hard to convince. Their disagreement over this had thrown up a wall of tension between them that seemed to cause an even greater barrier than his memory loss did.

When Julia had called to invite them to dinner at Cheaters with her and Molly, both
Ava
and Gabe agreed that it might be nice to get out of the house. Neither openly admitted that a change of scenery
and
company might be nice. Though it was no one’s fault, they were both stressed due to the situation and had begun to grate on each others’ nerves.

That was the last thing Ava thought they needed.

When they arrived, Julia slid into one side of the booth, Ava the other. When Gabe slid in next to Julia, Molly shot Ava a
What is this about?
look as she sat next to her.

Ava tried to give her a look back that implied it wasn’t a big deal. She was fairly certain that it came across as a grimace because Molly’s face immediately became concerned. Julia was seemingly oblivious that something might be amiss.

The waitress came nearly right away and they all put in their usual orders; a large pretzel for Julia and chicken strip baskets for Ava and Molly. Ava tucked her head down and smiled when Gabe ordered his usual as well; a bacon cheeseburger with a double order of onion rings and a butterscotch malt.

It was such a tiny thing, really, but it was a little piece of the old Gabe and her heart snatched it right up. Just as it did with each and every little glimmer that had come along.

“So, I’ve been researching,” Julia said as she leaned in, her voice quiet.

Molly groaned. “With you, that is never a good thing,” she lamented.

“What’ve you been researching?” Gabe asked as he looked at her with a great amount of suspicion.

“Amnesia,” she said unapologetically. “Since you both agreed that there was no traumatic head injury, I think it’s safe to rule out
post-traumatic amnesia. I think it’s more likely that
you’re suffering from a psychological repression of unpleasant memories. Although that, too, is iffy because I can’t imagine what could’ve happened that would be so bad your mind would want to repress your entire past.”

Julia looked speculative and Gabe, for the first time, glanced at Ava who couldn’t help but stare back at him.

“What? Are you holding back information?” Julia asked. “Did something happen that would’ve caused immense psychological stress?”

Only the fact that he died
, Ava thought.
And yes, I could see how that could definitely be a memory one would want to repress
.

Ignoring her question in an effort to avoid lying Gabe asked, “So, what does that mean? Exactly?”