Quod Me Nutrit Me Destruit: That Which Destroys Me with The Alternate Ending (8 page)

“Signore Wesley, what a lovely surprise. And this bella ragazza!” His face alights with happiness. “Madam you merely gracing us with your beauty.” He kisses his fingertips with his gray moustache covered mouth, “Piacere, Signore.”

He returns his attention to Wesley, “Signore, your
antico, no?”

“Please, Luciano. Grazie.” Wes nods and smiles before directing his attention back on me. After the waiter leaves to put our order in, Wes turns his body towards mine before running a finger along my jawline from one ear to the other causing me to shudder.

“Stella, how do you prefer me to approach this subject? In life, wait… Let me start over. You are a strong woman. When I watch you walk into a room, your shields of armor are so impenetrable that everyone except the ones you love startle at your fierceness. However, the only reaction I have is an intense desire to… Well, for lack of better words, crack you open and see what’s on the inside. So, back to the original question, shall we beat around the bush a little longer, or would you like for me to cut to the chase?”

Hmm… Sometimes beating around the bush does seem the better option. However, in the end, it all falls down to the bottom line.

Coughing to clear my throat, I follow my gut. “Hit me… let’s do this fucking shit.”

He lowers his voice a few octaves. "No, hit is something that I will never do.
Slap that sexy ass until it turns red, fuck yes. Take my cock and slap your face with it as I cum, definitely. Hit? Never."

Beasts Crave Beautie
s

Well, that image has fucking derailed my train of thought up more than I originally planned.

I can’t do this this slow shit. I want Stella, yesterday, last week… I NEED her, now. Right fucking now.

“I want you to try… We’ll start off slow. Well, as slow as I physically can without spontaneously combusting. Stella, I’m going to explain to you the reason I believe that you can do this.” Smiling at her, I slowly raise my hand and tuck a piece of hair behind her ear.

“You don’t flinch away from my touch.” My hand brushes against her cheek before tracing the line of her beautiful jaw and neck. “Your body instantly reacts from the feeling of my hands on your skin.” I let my fingertips whisper over her breast before leaning forward to block my illicit demonstrations from the restaurant. I grasp her breast in my hand before running my thumb back and forth causing her nipple to harden.

The moan that escapes her causes me to chuckle before I continue, “You soaked the cuff of my sleeve while I finger fucked that tight little pussy of yours Friday too, didn’t you, Ms. Reese?”

“
Mmhmm.” Her breaths are coming in raggedly. One of her hands grasps my shoulder before clenching the fabric of my suit jacket in her fist.

I slide my hand down further until I reach her bare crossed legs. I pause my hand below the end of her skirt. “Open your legs for me, let me feel how wet that cunt is.” Stella’s head lolls back at the same time her legs part. I skim my middle finger over her wet pussy lips and growl, “Just like I fucking thought.”

I slide the hand I’m palming her thigh with more in between them, nudging her legs further apart. I rub my hand against her wet flesh then I sink my finger into her hot wet pussy until I’m knuckle deep, then curl it finding the right spot. Her moans and pleas are coming out in labored gasps as her lips and breath caress my neck and ears. She whispers between her breaths in a husky voice, “Please, please Wesley.” Her hips are bucking violently against my hand.

I’m lost gazing at her. Her body moves against me sensually as she transforms into raw sex personified. Her face and neck are flushed, her head thrown back.
A sheen of sweat coats the skin of her face, neck, and chest. Her top teeth sinking hard into her puffy bottom lip, her beauty almost shatters me.

My voice is harsh and dark, “What, Stella? Please what? You want to cum?” My thumb circles her swollen clit faster before I delve a second finger into her tight pussy, thrusting them into her harder before growling into her ear. “You need to cum, angel? Then right here in this restaurant, I want you to bite down on my shoulder right this second and fucking cum all over my hand like a good little
cumslut, Ms. Reese. Right. Now.”

God-fucking-damn
! As Stella’s cum soaks my cuff from nothing more than my verbal command alone, I know - more than I know my own goddamn name - I know that there is a sub buried beneath the scars of Stella’s broken façade.

I cannot keep my mouth from consuming hers, swallowing her loud moans and pleas of pleasure. I slowly withdraw my hand from between her legs, and pull her trembling body close to mine, our kiss never losing rhythm.

Once her shuddering stills, I lean my face back to look down into her drunken andalusite eyes before smiling at her and whispering, “You’re going to be mine. It’s time for you to accept it.” I pause and wait for the orgasm-induced fog to lift and for understanding to cross her face.

After it does, I continue, “We can go slow, but I need you to know I’m going to push you, in more ways than one. I’m going to push and push until you are certain you’re going to break, Stella. But you never will, will you?”

I sweep my lips against hers and nip at her puffy, swollen mouth. “Even with all the hell you’ve endured, you have never truly broken. But my plan is to force you to the verge. I plan on ruining you… destroying you. And you will come out on the other side better for it, because that which doesn’t destroy you, Ms. Reese… Only makes you stronger.”

After a few minutes, during which time she chewed on that bottom lip of hers and I contemplated shoving her beautiful face in my lap making her take my aching cock between her swollen lips, she finally speaks—Hell yes my mind is still saturated with images of her lips around my cock! “I’ll try, Wesley. Shit, I can’t believe I’m even saying this, but yes, I will try. Just don’t expect anything from me.
Because I make no promises. I’ll never make you any promises.”

Bull-fucking-shit. I’ll get your goddamn promises—I’ll have you on your knees begging me to listen to your promises.

“I accept nothing less from you, Stella.”

The drive to her condo is quiet. Honestly, I feel like a weight, a burden that has had me shackled down for as long as I can remember, has finally lifted. As soon as the words ‘I’ll try.’ fell from Stella’s lips, they snipped the albatrosses tethered to my soul. 

I haven’t felt hope like this since before she came into my life again and I don’t know what it is, I can’t pinpoint why, however I also don’t give a fuck why. All I want is to fall into everything that Stella embodies and I never want to go anywhere else but inside of who she is.

I’ve said everything I felt needed to be said and I won’t push her any
more than I already have tonight. As far as I’m concerned, what the fuck I just conquered in Luciano’s was an impossible feat. I bent her will and common sense inward against themselves and they molded to my commands like soft clay.

Check. Mate. I’ve already mastered Stella Jolie Reese, and she’s already submitted…she just doesn’t realize it yet.

I pull up to the curb outside her place and quickly hop from the car to open her door and help her from my R8. Her little hand slips into mine as she looks up smiling at me as we walk to her door.

“Wow. I didn’t expect to find a gentleman in you, Wes.” Her laughter bounces off the sidewalk and buildings.

“I’ll do my best to keep you surprised.” I slide my arm around her waist when we get to the door of her building.

“Thank you for dinner. It was
ahh… quite becuming.” Her eyebrow lifts and a conniving grin appears when she enunciates the cum in becuming.

“It was. Tomorrow night’s dinner should be as well, if not more
becuming. I’ll pick you up at eight.” My fingertips tilt her chin until our eyes meet. I trace the bow of her top lip and pout of her bottom lip with my fingertips.

“Yes. Eight is perfect.” I brush my lips over hers and pull her body flush with mine.

“You did very good tonight, Stella. How does it make you feel when I say that?”

“It feels good.” She whispers.

“Good. Have a good night, angel.”

I kiss the palms of her hands before stepping back and letting her out of our embrace.

“You too.”

I remain where I am standing long after she’s made it inside the building. Completely fucking dumfounded and unable to move, I have to force myself to turn around and walk back to my car.

As soon as my car pulls away from the curb, mad crazy fucking shit starts battering itself into my mind.

It’s fucking insanity.

Goddamn primal on every level.

Every instinct I possess is screaming at me to turn around and demand for her to get her ass in my car and never fucking
leave my side again.

The alpha inside me viciously howls for me to claim her.

The Dom residing in me adamantly demands that I bend, break, and control Stella—mind, body and soul.

But it’s the uncivilized beast within that ruts and growls insisting
that I fuck her into oblivion.

When Beauty Fights a Beast

There is blood all around me. As the screams pierce my eardrums the blood soaks into my clothes. I’m so cold. I don’t remember how I ended up on the bloody living room floor. I was asleep in my bed. Tomorrow’s a school day and even though he was not home I still set my clothes out for tomorrow, bathed, brushed my teeth and set my alarm for in the morning. The last thing I remember before waking up here is falling asleep in my bed. I run my blood soaked hands over my body trying to see if the blood is coming from me. When I realize it isn’t, that it’s his blood I move to see if he’s alive but stop myself before touching him. If he isn’t dead and I wake him I won’t like what happens. The screams continue getting louder. If they don’t stop then I’ll be the one that pays for it, he’ll come after me again. I don’t think I can handle more broken bones or other forms of agony he forces me to endure, not on top of all the bloody carnage I am having to witness. I cover my ears to stifle the shrieks but blood smears into my hair and on my face. I try to scream at them to shut up! I need them to shut up… When I try to yell at them to stop I realize the screams bouncing off the bare trailer walls are my own. Immediately I shove my fist into my mouth in an effort to smother my screams. As soon as the metallic taste of blood hits my tongue I gag around my blood soaked fist heaving up what little supper I ate.

I’m jerked from my nightmare by Eve lightly shaking me and whispering, “
Stell. Stell, wake up, sweetie. You’re having another nightmare, wake up.”

“Hey, sis.
I’m okay, I’m up. Sorry.” I sit up and hug her neck, immediately I feel her tears on my shoulder and gently stroke her fine blond hair. “Sis, hey. Don’t cry. I’m okay.” I pull back and smile at her. “See, it was just a nightmare, babe.”

“I don’t know how you do it,
Stell.” She sniffs before wiping the tears away from her almond shaped blue eyes. “I know you don’t cry. I know you’re strong, but the shit you scream in your nightmares scares the living hell out of me. You don’t always have to be strong. If you wanted to talk to—“

“Eve. Stop that fucking crazy thought train right now. I spent my whole damn life in therapy—on antidepressants and group meetings up to five times a week. It didn’t help then, and it won’t help now. The shit that I’ve been through is shit that I talked about and rehashed until I was blue in the face. There comes a time when you leave the past where it belongs, accept that life is shit, accept that it’s up to you and you alone to make YOU… ME happy. And I have, sweetie. I’m fine.” I smile again trying to convince her that I am okay.

“Have you thought about… Have you wanted to cut, Stell?”

I answer as honestly as I can, “If I have I quickly reminded myself that I’m not a coward. And THAT is the easy way out.
I’m just fine on the path I’m on right now.”

“I love you, you’re like a sister me. I just don’t want you in hell all alone.” She looks at my pleadingly, and I can’t help the sinister laugh that escapes my chest.

“Sweetie, you couldn’t handle my hell. You just stay where you are, stay honest and pure, stay beautiful and untainted. Smile for the photogs and do your damn thing girl. Because THAT makes me happy. Too see you happy, makes me happy, Eve. Okay?” I smile to reassure her.

She nods before hugging my neck. “Here, your bed is drenched in sweat again. I’ll throw these in the wash and be back to help you make your bed up.”

“Okay. Hey, I didn’t wake anyone else up did I?” I ask.

“No, Bo is still passed out from drinking too much during the Jets pre-season game. Trina’s still in her room asleep.”

“Whew, okay good. Thanks sissy.”

After she helps me get my bed made I lie awake looking at my ceiling
until the sun rises the next morning. My thoughts are all over the place. Wesley, I don’t know what the hell is going on between me and him.

It’s hard as hell for me to deny him anything he wants. And, Jesus Christmas I love to make him proud, or happy. Shit I get butterflies just from making him smile! The ‘good
job.’ Or ‘damn you’re a quick learner.’’s I get from him make me smile like a damn love struck fool.

From the moment his hand circled my elbow at Chained and he lead me to his car I’d let any and all reservations I previously had where Wesley Jacobs was concerned just float away. Well, except for when he sat back like the devil and refused to give my body what it was dying for. But even then I was far too intrigued by him to not play the devil
’s advocate.

If I may… Without sounding to cliché, just fucking listen to me.
Woman to woman. Friend to friend. I’ve never allowed myself to even be interested enough in a man to do more than kiss me. I am a twenty-six year old, red blooded American woman who LOVES reading smut, reading how the characters feel, not just emotionally but physically. And when I had to walk away from Wes’s penthouse that night, it fucking hit me like a mack truck! Goddammit I am starved… For him, for his touch, his words, his smile.

Now, with that little epiphany comes the question. Am I ready as well as strong enough to try
to do what Wesley wants me to?

Umm… Fuck yes.

And before you ask if I’ll be able to make it through, even if it does end badly and I’m left heart broken, your answer lies within the following statement: Bitch have you not been reading? This, Wesley fucking Jacobs is an ice cream sundae compared to savage and violent hell I’ve lived in, been forced to endure, and made it out of alive.

“Oh my fuck, seriously? Jiminy Crickets it’s a damn date, bitches. Not my wedding day!” I am literally being tagged teamed with makeup, high heels, and perfume by Trina and Eve.

“
Stell, please at least try the eyelashes. I will glue those bitches on so tight it will take a month for them to come off!” Eve’s coming at me again with glue and lashes.

“Hell no!” I shoo her away and look up at Trina through the mirror
, she’s holding up a black sleeveless dress and a nude satin number with a plunging neckline. “Ahh… Nude?” I ask with a shrug.

“God-
fucking-damn straight nude! Eve! Shit! Stop!” Trina yanks the glue and lash compact from her hands and tosses them in the trash.

Trina hands Eve our two glasses of wine. “Here, go fill those fuckers up.” She kisses the air before telling Eve, “You know I love you! Right?”

“You only love me when I’m being your wine bitch.” Eve mutters on her way towards the kitchen.

“
Stell! Okay, so where are you at with this guy? I mean I know about your date last night. Or dinner, what the fuck ever. But… Here’s my question.” She holds up a pair of black fuck me stilettos in one hand and a pair of brown wedges in her other. “Shoes? Your answer will answer mine.”

“G
oing with the black ones, sister.”

Trina squeals and jumps up and down like a damn fan
-girl screaming, “Hell YES! That’s my girl!”

After I’m dressed in the nude dress with its pencil skirt hitting just below my knees, as well as the plunging neck line—That required double sided tape. I stand in my
six-inch black peep-toe stilettos holding my clutch on the curb at 7:40 waiting for Wesley to show up.

A shiny black sports car I’ve never seen before pulls up to the curb outside my place and b
efore I notice it’s him he’s out of the car opening the passenger door for me.

“
Fucking hell, Ms. Reese. How in God’s name do you expect me to make it through dinner without slamming you up against the nearest stable surface with
THAT
dress on?” He growls through his gritted teeth.

“You
’ll make it, well… Maybe you will.” I grin before slipping into the low seat and sighing in anticipation.

I have no fucking clue what I’m doing. I don’t know how to flirt, or be funny without it sounding completely ridiculous and forced.

I don’t know what this night holds in store for me, nor do I know what Wesley has planned.

But what I do know… Is that I’m ready.

I’ve been fighting to stay alive, remain sane and in control for as long as I can remember. And tonight, whatever lies ahead. I refuse to fight it. As I stare outside the window, a quote I read at some point in my childhood that has always stayed with me, strikes me with a new meaning…