Raber Wolf Pack Book Three (2 page)

Yep, a wolf shifter who can’t shift into a wolf. Don’t get me completely wrong, I have, three times. And I remember each second of those times. The first time was a clusterfuck, but that happens to most wolves since it’s such a change and distortion of their bodies and minds. The second time was the next day and the last time was the day after that. Three days in a row and then—NOTHING.

Somehow, some way, the wolf inside me got locked into a glass box. I can see her, sense her, and feel her, but I can’t get her out of the box. I’ve tried to take a mental sledgehammer to it, but that didn’t work either.

So, my wolf and I have come to an understanding. I will continue to try and she lets up on the whining. Now, I only get it once a day instead of every minute of the day. If she could get out, though, she would be so much happier and in turn so would I, but I’ve tried everything that I can think of and nothing works. At least I can focus on this problem.

I need to stop my parents from going through with this reading and the best way to do that is through my mom. If the wizard tells my parents about
him
, I’ll be screwed. I’ll get the lecture from hell about why I haven’t gone with him, and then my mother will do the whole ‘you are perfectly fine’ speech…and on and on and on. Not something I want to deal with, ever.

I storm into the common room of our den, wolves are scattered all around. Some in wolf form, some in human, most just lounging around. We’ve been very lucky that things have been quiet around these parts, or at least that’s what Alpha tells us. We are only privy to what he lets us know, which is fine by me. I don’t need to know all the political crap that goes on with all the wolves.

“Look who decided to join us.”

I roll my eyes, turning to my sister Sydney and her snide words. She’s always been a bitch. She seriously came out of my mother that way and has decided never to change. I’m the oldest so I know. I’ve dealt with it the longest. She’s beautiful and she knows it, and she flaunts it to anyone she can. Lucky us. I’m a bit sarcastic, but one has to be when they can’t shift and run with the other wolves. It’s a great distraction.

“What, Syd?” I snap, the room getting quieter by the second, and I can practically feel eyes caressing my skin. I’m used to this, too. My pack always loves a good show. I wish to the Heavens that my sisters would learn not to mess with me. But…

“Oh. You. Can. Hear. Me?” She enunciates each word, loudly and very slowly, her eyes wide while they dance with humor. I roll mine. She is seriously dumber than a box of rocks. She never learns. I swear my mother pounded her upside the head with a rock when she was a pup.

“Yes, dumbass,” I growl out, clenching my fists. She’s itching for it and I’m itching to take my aggression out. Another one of my
issues
is that I was born with only one ear. Yep. A one-eared, non-shifting wolf, but even with only one, I can still hear with the best of them. Maybe even more so because I rely on my one ear so much.

It never really bothered me until I shifted the first time. I don’t know why I thought that I would miraculously have an ear by changing into a wolf, still I had hoped. But, that wasn’t in the cards for me. That first shift, I didn’t have the ear and my sisters never let me live it down. Nothing like being an outsider.

“What? I couldn’t hear you.” Sydney starts laughing loudly as Savannah strolls up behind her.

“Then maybe you should get your ears checked. Wouldn’t want you to end up like me?” I breathe in a small gasp and place my fingers over my lips in mock shock. Her eyes turn red hot and I smirk.

“I’ve been checked and I’m perfect, unlike you,” she snarls, her finger pointing at my chest.

So close. I’m so close to grabbing it and breaking it. I hold back, barely.

I let out a hard laugh instead, not taking my eyes off of them. “Perfect? I think you need a second opinion, or else stop blowing the doctor so he tells you what you want to hear.”

“You bitch!” Sydney screeches, and Savannah stomps in front of Syd, throwing an arm out to block her. What is she doing? Trying to protect her? That’s funny shit right there. “You’re just jealous. No male is ever going to want you as a mate. You’re a defective bitch!”

I cross my arms over my chest and glare at her, not saying a word because that’s what she wants. She wants me to argue back. I swear she gets off on that shit. It just annoys me. Also, I would never give her the satisfaction of knowing my target spot, the spot that will get me. I’ll never give her that power.

“Come on, Syd, let’s go.” Savannah tries to push her back. Aww. How cute. Savannah is trying to be peacemaker. I burst out laughing, unable to hold it in. This is just too funny.

“What in the hell are you laughing at?” Syd screams as Vannah tries to push her back.

“Let her go, Vannah.” It only happens for a second, but I see it. Her slight tremble. She has learned over the years, at least somewhat, unlike Syd. She reluctantly lets go and Syd comes barreling toward me.

I make a tight spin and kick with everything I have, landing right in her gut. She flies back, slamming into the kitchen island with a hard thud. Ouch, that had to hurt. What I’m lacking in ears and shifting abilities, I gained in strength and endurance somehow. My strength in human-form is about double what it would be in wolf-form, and speed? I’ve got that in spades. I can keep up with any of my pack members on only two legs. It’s actually how I got the respect of my pack. Once they saw I was not a liability everyone backed off, except my sisters.

“You bitch!” Syd yells, practically shifting as she comes toward me. I’m not gonna lie. I can’t fight a wolf. Two words—teeth, claws. I may have excellent strength, but without those two things, I’d never be able to fight off a wolf.

I move so fast I’m a blur, ending up behind Syd, and kick her in the back, sending her flying into the living quarters. Syd lands with a loud thud but pops right back up, ready to go again. I don’t take my eyes off of her for a moment.

Syd charges me, only to barrel into the wall as I dart out of her way. See, plain-out stupid. Savannah says nothing, just stays off to the side with her arms crossed. Good.

“Are you done with this yet?” I ask in a bored tone. Even though it does help me keep up with my skill set, I have bigger fish to fry at the moment.

“Not until I rip your throat out,” she screams.

“Damn, you really do love me.” I flutter my eyes as if what I just said is the sweetest, most sincere thing that’s ever come out of my mouth. It only irritates her more. I shouldn’t egg it on, but she is just too easy.

She charges my way again and swipes her now shifted claw at my stomach, catching my shirt and ripping it as I move. Dammit. This was one of my favorites. At least she didn’t break skin and get blood on it. I can just sew it up.

“Girls!” my father’s deep voice calls from the doorway, but my eyes never leave Syd. I’m not in the mood to get sucker punched. “Enough!” he barks, and I wait for Syd to listen. It takes her a bit, but she finally relaxes her body, moving out of her stance and turning fully to human.

I turn to my dad. “Did you seriously have to have more pups after me?” His handsome face turns into a soft smile. I’ve always been a daddy’s girl and always will be. He is seriously the best guy ever and no one will ever live up to him. He can also be scary as shit when he wants to be, and when his eyes flash to Syd, that’s when I see the anger bubbling.

“I think that every day,” he says, glaring at my sister who huffs. “Get cleaned up, Sydney, and for the love of the Heavens, stop with this shit. Haven’t you learned that your sister isn’t going to put up with your bullshit and all you’re doing is making yourself look weak and a fool?”

I so love my father.

“She—” Sydney starts and my father holds up his hand, silencing her. She pouts.

“Don’t want to hear it because I wouldn’t believe a word that comes out of that mouth.”

“Dad…,” she whines and I close my eyes briefly, trying not to roll them.

“I said enough. Go. Savannah, help her.” They stalk out of the room and several wolves begin to laugh. Can’t blame them. Pathetic is what it is.

“I’ve gotta go find Mom.” I walk past my father, giving him a dazzling smile in hopes of saying thank you without actually saying it.

“Sabrea.” I halt at my father’s tone. “If this is about you not going to see Marvin, forget it. You’ll be wasting your breath.” My stomach drops. Dammit.

“I never was a quitter,” I answer, moving away from my dad.

“No, no you are not,” he murmurs, knowing full well that I can hear him. Love that man.

“How did you even get us in there?”

He smirks. “A favor earns a favor.” That’s all he says before turning and walking from the room. Whatever.

“MOM!” I YELL FOR
the tenth time. One would think with supersonic hearing she could hear me from a mile away, but chances are she has earbuds in and she’s listening to one of those raunchy books we both love so much. I step out onto the back deck, eyes landing directly on her.

Sitting in the sunlight, lounging in a chair that is positioned almost all the way flat, is my mother—the most beautiful, outgoing, loving person I know. Her hair is the same color as mine, a deep brown with hints of red if the sun hits it just right. Hers is only an inch shorter than mine and it comes to her mid-back in waves. Everything about my mother screams beautiful.

From the wires hanging out of her ears, I can tell she’s indeed listening to something and my curiosity piques as to what. Her sunglasses cover her eyes but I have no doubt they are open, taking in the beauty of the woods that surround us.

“Sabrea, you need something?” She pulls the buds out of her ears and turns her head to me as I take a seat on the lounge chair next to her.

“I’d like to talk to you about this meeting you and Dad set up for me, Syd, and Savannah.”

My mother takes her glasses off and pulls the chair to a sitting position, fumbling with her phone to turn off her latest book craze. I’ve always loved how she gives me her undivided attention. One of the many things I love about my mom.

“What about it?” She clasps her hands in front of her, intertwining her fingers. It’s kind of weird her elegant, long fingers are one of the things I like about my mom, but that’s me, weird. Oddball. You name it, I’ve been called it. Small things make me happy and my mom’s hands are one of them.

How do I put this so it’s not disrespectful, but gets my point across? “I think it’s a bad idea.” That didn’t sound too bad and Mom’s not scrunching up her nose, so that’s a good sign.

“Why is that?”

Dammit. Duh, dumbass, like she’d let something like this go without an explanation.

I think fast. “I know that Syd and Savannah are set on finding their mates. They’ve been looking nonstop. And it’s fine if they want to go through with this, but I don’t, Mom. I like it here; I’m not ready to go.”

“Sweetheart, I know that you do and I love having you here, but,” and there’s the but, “you need to have your own life. You can’t live in a book, honey.”

“Mom, I like reading, just like you do. It’s exciting, thrilling. I can be anyone I want to be for about three hundred pages, and then someone else in the next. It’s fantastic.” I do love it. I found my first book when I was a pup and the escape was magnificent. Then I never stopped and why would I? It’s the one place where I can find peace and not feel so damn worthless in this existence. None of these wolves understand what it’s like to be trapped.

“I know it is, sweetie, but there is so much more to life than being in a book all the time. If you don’t take a moment to enjoy it, you will miss so many great things.” Her face is etched in concern and though I know she means well, I just don’t like the idea. If I go, I won’t be able to hide that I’ve already sensed him, and the last time I went to Marvin didn’t fare so well.

“That doesn’t explain why you want Syd and Savannah to do it, too. They’re very social.” And that’s saying it in a nice way. They’ve been
social
with every wolf in our pack, the neighboring pack, and it wouldn’t surprise me if some humans were thrown in there just for fun.

“And that’s the exact reason why I want them to go. You and those two are on totally opposite ends of the spectrum.” She’s got that right. “I just want a balance for all of you.” She drops her head, lost in thought for a moment, then lifts it. “I know you see having only one ear and…,” she drifts off.

“My shifting abnormality.” I offer. She never likes to bring it up and I appreciate that she doesn’t, most of the time, but it’s who I am.

“Yes, sweetheart. Those two things do not make you defective or unable to love. It doesn’t make you wrong. It makes you special.”

I scoff at the word.
Special
. One word I would never ever call myself. Being a wolf born with a defect, an abnormality, in other words, is something wrong. That’s me. Being born with only one ear would have been hard enough as a human, but as a human I can cover it up with my hair easy enough. As a wolf, there is no hiding its loss. So it’s the only positive about not shifting.