Reckless Retribution (West Warriors Book 1) (27 page)

Slowly, he walked over to me and gently pulled the shirt from my hands, tossing it to the floor. With desire in his eyes, he unbuttoned my jeans and slid them down my legs, bending down as he did so to pull them off. Once I was out of them, his mouth went to the inside of my thigh, placing soft kisses until he reached the edge of my panties.

“Oh God, Jamie,” I moaned, reveling in the feel of his mouth on me. In response, he squeezed my behind with both of his hands and a deep groan rumbled from him. My legs began to tremble, and I wanted out of my panties. He moved away from them though, and stood up, pulling me toward the bed. With his hands behind me, he unhooked my bra, and I slid out of my panties. I wasn’t in the mood to wait. Lying down on the pillow, I carefully adjusted my head to avoid any unnecessary pressure.

“Are you okay?” he asked, rolling on a condom, watching me.

“Yeah.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah,” I reassured him.

Nestling in between my legs, he looked at my head with concern on his face. He gently put a hand under the back of my neck. “I’ll hold you, okay?”

“Okay.” I relaxed my head into the comforting warmth of his hand and the familiar feeling of security formed a bubble around us. The way he was being so attentive was endearing. As he slid inside me, he made a delicious noise, which I couldn’t help but emulate he felt so good. “God, I’ve missed this.” He breathed heavily. He moved in and out of me slower than before, and his eyes never left mine. He kept wanting reassurance from me that I was okay.Love for him consumed every inch of me. I loved the way he was protective and caring. I loved that he was honest and not afraid to admit when he was wrong. Damn, I even loved that he was hot headed and moody sometimes; it only added to his appeal. Looking into his deep brown eyes, I knew I had fallen in love with him, and I had to try so hard not to let those words fall out of my mouth. The consequences would be disastrous.

He began to move a little faster, picking up a bit of speed, and his hand never once let my head fall. “Jesus, Lauren,” he moaned, as his breathing and thrusts quickened. I could feel myself tightening around him and my orgasm building, and when it released, Jamie’s orgasm took hold of him with one last deep thrust.

Burying his head in the crook of my neck, he lay there silently for a few seconds while he regained his breath, and I gently caressed the back of his shaved hair, enjoying the intimacy with him. When his head rose to look at me, he was wide-eyed and staring at me, almost in disbelief.

“What?” I asked, alarmed by the look on his face. He shook his head and closed his eyes, indicating that he didn’t want me to go there. Then he opened his eyes, blinking slowly, but the look was still there. “Have I done something wrong?” I began to panic and think about what I could have done. Something had caused him to react like this. He shook his head at me.

“Tell me?” I begged.

He took a few seconds. “It’s just… what we did… how we did…,” he stuttered, running his hand over his head. “
It was slow!
” The tone of his voice almost squeaked as he said each word.

Relief flooded me that it was nothing I had done, and I wanted to laugh that he was making such a big deal out of the slower-than-normal pace. I did have a sore head, after all. “It’s okay, Jamie. Sex isn’t always about hammering it out.”

“I know, it just felt like we were… you know.” He waved his hand, wide-eyed again. He looked so damn adorable.

“What?” I asked, knowing he was trying his best not to say the words “making love.”

“Never mind.” He made a move to get off the bed, but I grabbed his arm and pulled him back to me.

“Tell me. Tell me honestly what has gotten you so wide-eyed?”

He turned back on his side, facing me. “It felt like we were making love. There, I said it. Okay?” he snapped.

“You didn’t enjoy it? Was it that bad?” Fear set in, as I hoped he wasn’t going to run again.

“No, of course not. It was just… not what I’m used to doing.”

Again, I was relieved he wasn’t running, but I didn’t want to think about what kinds of things he was used to doing with girls. But it was kind of a first for me too.

“Have you ever made love to someone before?” I asked curiously.

His eyes flashed to mine. “We are
not
going there.” Awkward silence filled the room. “Have you?” he asked when he finally spoke.

“Kind of.” I shrugged.

“Kind of? What the hell is that supposed to mean?” He frowned, looking at me like I had two heads.

“That was the closest thing to it.” I gestured to what we had just done. I had never made love to anyone before. I’d slept with a few guys, but there wasn’t that much emotion attached to it. Jamie was different.

His eyes widened in shock again, and he started shaking his head and waving his hands in front of him. “We did not make love. You have a cut on you head. I do
not
love you.” His words came tumbling out in a rush, and the harshness of his tone crushed me somewhat. I knew we hadn’t made love. I knew he didn’t love me, and what we were doing didn’t have any real emotion attached to it on his part, but the way he said things sometimes cut really deep.

“I know you don’t. You asked me an honest question, and I just answered it. I’m sorry for freaking you out,” I replied quietly, trying to keep the hurt out of my voice. Not liking where this was heading, I thought it would be best to leave. I’d freaked him out, and I didn’t want any tension between us. Climbing out of his bed, where he was now fully tucked under the covers, I grabbed my clothes together and began putting them on. He lay against the headboard, watching me.

“Look, I didn’t mean it like that.” He looked at me like he knew he had hurt my feelings.

I wondered if he had any idea just how I
did
feel about him. He would probably end things promptly if he did. I knew there and then I was getting in too deep with him, and I would only end up hurt. I’d never had this kind of non-relationship before, and it was starting to get a bit too much to bear. “I know. It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize. I’m sorry too.” I smiled softly back at him, hoping it masked the pain. I pulled my work shirt over my head.

“Where are you going?” he asked quietly.

“I need to get home,” I said, grabbing my jeans from the floor.

“Need to, or want to?”

“Both?”

He folded his arms across his chest. “Look, just stay. Please?”

“Well, it feels a bit awkward now that you’ve freaked out.”

“I’m not freaked out.” I set my hands on my hips, not believing him. I knew he was lying.

He rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue. “C’mon, just stay. Please.” Unable to resist him, as always, I dropped my jeans back onto the floor and lay back in bed, facing away from him and pulling the covers around me. I heard him sigh before he scooted down a bit and cuddled up to me, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist. He buried his face in my hair the way he does and inhaled. “You bring out a lot of weird stuff in me,” he murmured into my hair. I didn’t question him on what exactly that meant. I knew it was best to keep my mouth closed. “Are you keeping the T-shirt on?”

“Yeah, why?” I asked.

“Can you take it off?”

“Why? It’s comfy.”

“Please?”

I gave in and took it off, putting it on the floor, and he wrapped his arms around me again.

“I like the smell of your skin. It’s nice,” he breathed.

I smiled at the compliment. “Don’t you have to be back at the club?”

“No, I’m supposed to be resting until I go back at seven.”

“What we did was your idea of resting?”

“That was my perfect idea of resting.” He chuckled.

In the comfort of his arms, I closed my eyes and tried not to think about leaving him.

Two weeks later

Jamie’s fight tonight was being held at
The Circle
,
a local ice arena that held a lot of big sporting events. Kal and the usual trainers from the club were here, and a few of the guys’ friends had come along to watch him, with it being a local fight. Music filled the arena, and the energy of the place was crazy. Standing with a large group of males, lots of energetic banter and general ‘guy talk’ was happening around me. I felt slightly awkward and out of place being the only female in our group yet again.

Glancing to Jamie’s sister, who sat along our row with her parents, I wished I had the guts to speak to her. I hated that I felt like she didn’t like me. I would give anything to have some female company right now, and we both had her brother in common, so I was certain we could find something to talk about, even if it was limited to just Jamie. Breathing out a shaky breath, my nerves were at an all-time high as they always were, but this time, I was
more
terrified for him, because of the non-relationship we now had. I didn’t want him getting hurt, and if he did, I don’t think there would be any way of concealing my feelings for him.

The arena lights dimmed, the music died down, and strobe lights flashed around his walkout entrance.
Radioactive
filled my ears, and he confidently walked down to the cage. My nerves simmered slightly as my body flooded with pride and, of course, desire for him. He was strong and determined, and watching him walk into that cage the way he did always left me in awe of him.

On the surface, he was the silent, tough fighter who doesn’t show much emotion, but I was blessed to know the true Jamie, the one who not many people got to see. He was a very caring, loyal, sensitive person, and I loved the bones of him. We’d barely seen or touched each other for two weeks while his training was intense and he needed to keep his head in the game. Tonight would spell the end of our ban and I couldn’t wait.

He was pumped about this fight. Some big sponsors told Kal they were interested in having Jamie wear their famous sportswear brand with the possibility of an endorsement deal, which meant mega publicity and money for him. He was already sponsored by a popular brand of supplements that Kal stocked at the club, but I knew this particular clothing brand was huge in the sporting world. Jamie’s goal was to make it to the UFC, and I had every faith in him, even if I didn’t like the sport much.

Inside the cage, Jamie bounced up and down, getting himself fired up. I could tell he was feeling more nervous than usual, and I wondered whether it was the pending sponsorship deal or his opponent that was making him that way. Jenson Day was an undefeated champion, and Jamie was hell-bent on stripping him of it. That was all he joked about at the club in the weeks leading up to the fight, especially because the fight was on Jamie’s own turf.

The fight was full-on and intense from the start. They threw some good hits at each other, and Jamie got some good kicks and takedowns in. During the second round, I watched as Jenson landed a lethal blow to Jamie’s left eyebrow that instantly split on impact. I winced as the blood began to trickle down his face and into his eye. He constantly wiped it away from his face with his arm, which was now streaked red. Almost all of his opponents took a hit to his eyebrow. They knew it was a weakness.

After grappling some more, Jamie overpowered Jenson, throwing him to the ground with everything he had. The sound of his body hitting the floor echoed around the arena, and the crowd went wild. Jamie mounted him and with one hand held him by the throat, raising his other fist clenched, ready to deliver a lethal blow to Jenson’s face. I cringed when it made contact.

After taking the hit, Jenson tried to sweep Jamie off him, loosening Jamie’s legs from their grip around him, and seeing an opportunity, Jenson then locked legs with Jamie and began to twist them while throwing uppercuts toward Jamie’s face, which he artfully dodged.

Eventually, Jenson managed to roll Jamie off him, and they grappled for dominance once again on the floor. The bell sounded, and both men went to their corners. I watched as Dale cleaned Jamie’s face and put more Vaseline on his cut, while Kal talked to him. Water was squirted into his mouth, and all too soon, the bell sounded again.

When the fight progressed to the last round, the two men came together again, and the intense struggle for dominance was palpable. Jamie jabbed his foot out full-force, connecting with Jenson’s side, making him stumble. He was powerful with his legs; as a trained kickboxer, his moves were skilled and fluid. The men came together in a tangle of forearms and jabs, hitting and blocking each other, and Jamie jabbed Jenson in his right eye, causing him to stumble again.

The crowd around me roared in delight and the guys beside me were shouting words of encouragement to him, and I was dodging being splashed with beer that was slopping around their friends’ cups as they eagerly joined in cheering for him. Jenson threw another punch at Jamie, and he ended up taking it on his cheekbone. His face was a mess; the Vaseline wasn’t helping much, and he still had blood trickling down the side of his face. He almost looked unrecognizable. Jenson wasn’t looking too good either.

The final bell sounded, signaling the end of the fight, and both Jenson and Jamie tapped each other’s gloves as rapturous cheers echoed from around the arena and I could finally breathe that I was getting Jamie back in one piece, despite his cuts and bruises. It had been a good match, and both of them were strong and determined, but because there was no knockout or submission, it was now down to points. Their fate lay with the judges. It was going to be an agonizing wait for everyone.

I knew Jamie wouldn’t be happy with the outcome; he wanted a knockout. Making my way down to the cage with the guys, they were weighing up Jamie’s chances of winning and I hoped they were right. We reached Kal, and he was adamant Jamie had won on points because he had the most dominance throughout, got some good hits and kicks in, and avoided a lot of takedowns.

I glanced at Jamie sitting down in his corner, spitting out his black mouth guard into the bucket, and I just wanted to throw my arms around him. Seeing him hurt wounded me deeply. Dale cleaned him up, and Kurt looked like he was applying some tape to his cut. Kal was now by his side, chatting to him and no doubt reassuring him. The noise in the arena was almost deafening as the suspense built over who would win, and the guys and I moved next to Jamie at the opposite side of the cage wall once his family took a step back after checking on him. Jamie stood, and I jumped at the chance to speak to him. Catching his attention, I asked him how he was doing. He looked exhausted.