Remember (19 page)

chapter thirty-three

I
counted to two hundred to give them time to leave this part of the building. I said a small prayer it would work and wiped the key card over the panel by the door. The lock clicked open. I pulled the door open a few inches and peeked out. The hallway was empty.

I slid out and started walking. I glanced up at the ceiling. There were cameras everywhere. Odds were no one would be watching them on a Saturday—they might not even be on—but I couldn’t count on it. As soon as my dad realized I was missing, he was going to raise the alarm. He’d find me on his own if he could to avoid including too many others, but if he couldn’t, he’d tell everyone I was crazy. I had to get out of here. I didn’t have any car keys, so I wasn’t going to get far without a plan.

My footsteps seemed extremely loud to my ears. I swiped
the card by one of the doors in the hall and went inside. It was a large room filled with cubicles, one of the customer service departments. I ducked into the first one. The cubicle was clearly owned by a proud parent. There were pictures of a baby pinned all over the fabric walls. A small teddy bear leaned against the computer monitor.

I picked up the phone and waited to see if hordes of security would race down at me, but nothing happened. I pushed for an outside line and dialed. I thought about calling the police, but I was afraid they wouldn’t believe me. My dad was right; what I was saying wasn’t an easy story. By the time they got there, he would have already swapped out the thumb drive for a blank one. He’d tell them I was unwell, that I was some kind of trauma victim who’d snapped. They might tell him he couldn’t do the procedure, but I wasn’t sure. My dad was an important guy in town. The police would want to trust him. There was only one person I could think of who would believe me. Thank God he made me memorize his number so it wouldn’t be programmed on my phone. I had no idea what I’d do if he wasn’t home.

“Hello?” The sound of Neil’s voice washed over me like fresh air after having been underwater too long. “Who is this?” He sounded wary.

“It’s me,” I said softly in the phone.

“Why are you calling me from Neurotech?” He must have had caller identification on his phone.

“You were right,” I said in a rush. “About everything. I remembered.”

“Why are you there?”

“I came to confront my dad. My real mom discovered there were side effects. He wanted to keep that hidden. He didn’t kill her, it was an accident, but he wiped my memory to keep me from telling anyone about the data.”

“You shouldn’t have gone there on your own.”

I rolled my eyes. “I figured that out already. He’s threatening to wipe my memory again. He’s going to make all of this disappear.”

I heard him mumble to someone in the background. “Okay, write this down.” Neil spewed off a number at me. “That’s Trey’s cell; he’s lending it to me. Call me right back at that number. I’m leaving now to come get you.”

He hung up. I felt better knowing that he was already on his way. I pressed down the receiver and then called the cell right back. He picked up before the first ring completed. I could hear a car revving up.

“You should call the cops, or I will,” he said.

“Don’t. If you do, he’s going to tell them I’m crazy. That I’m having paranoid delusions.”

“Someone will listen,” he said.

“Maybe. Maybe not. The thing is, there’s proof. There’s a thumb drive with the research data on it. There was a copy, but that’s already gone. If I know my dad, he’s put the drive back in
his office. He’ll want to check it out for himself and he’s got to convince Josh to leave. I’m going to get it.”

“No. It’s too risky. Get out of there. If you don’t trust the cops, then we’ll take you away, where he can’t touch you until we do make someone believe us.” I could hear a car honk through the phone. He must have been racing through traffic.

“They’re not going to believe us without proof.”

“Then we’ll figure out what we need to do to get you out of that house. You’re eighteen.”

I heard a sound in the hall and froze. “Shhh.” Someone was walking by. I slid down the cubicle wall so I was sitting on the floor. The door rattled when someone tried the knob. The industrial carpet gave off a vague chemical smell, and I prayed I wouldn’t sneeze. Neil’s quiet breathing in my ear was the only thing keeping me grounded. I squeezed the phone. I peered around the cubicle wall. There was another door at the far end. I had no idea if it led into the hall or a storage closet. The person in the hall walked away, their footsteps receding. “They’re gone,” I whispered into the phone.

Neil let out a gasp. “Jesus, my heart almost stopped. You need to leave now. Get out of there.”

“If I get that thumb drive, we can prove all of it. That what happened to your brother wasn’t an accident.”

Neil was silent on the line for a second. “It doesn’t matter. Just leave.”

I pulled back the receiver and looked at it as if I could see
him and then brought it back to my mouth. “Don’t you get it? This is your chance. This is what you’ve always wanted. A chance to break this open. Prove what you’ve always suspected. You told me once that you wanted to do something that would make up for your brother being gone. This is it.”

“What I learned is that I matter when someone else matters to me.
You
matter. Nothing is worth more to me than knowing you’re safe. I put getting Neurotech ahead of you once, when I lied to you. I don’t plan to make the same mistake twice. I thought beating Neurotech would make me happy, but it won’t. I’ve been focused on the past and I don’t want to be like that anymore.” His car squealed again as it rounded a corner. “I’m on the highway now. I’ll be there soon. Get out before someone finds you. There’s a wooded lot behind the building; go there and wait for me.”

“You’d give up proving your brother’s death wasn’t an accident?” I asked. “Why?”

“How can you be so smart one second and so dim the next? I would do it because I love you.”

My mouth fell open.

“Are you there?” he asked. “Please tell me you didn’t just hang up on me. I know this isn’t the right time or place to tell you.”

“You do have a flair for the inappropriate,” I managed to say.

He laughed. “I promise to work on it if you give me another
chance. Next time I’ll do it over a romantic dinner, or by the ocean. Or at the very least not while you’re hiding somewhere and we’re talking on the phone.”

“I’d like that,” I said.

“Then give us that chance. Leave.” His voice was urgent.

“I want you to know that I want to more than just about anything, but I have to do this. It’s the right thing to do. I lost my way recently, but I believe in this. That this is the right thing to do.”

“Harper—”

“Meet me in the parking lot. I’ll get there as soon as I can.”

“No! What if you’re caught? He’ll wipe your memory.”

I took a deep breath. “Then I better tell you now that I love you too, just in case. I’m going to get the thumb drive.”

I hung up the phone before he could say anything else.

chapter thirty-four

I
sat on the floor of the cubicle for another minute and let myself enjoy the fact that he loved me. I wanted to do what Neil had told me, to just run away, but I couldn’t. I needed to do the right thing, even if it wasn’t easy. I had to prove to myself that I was more like my mom than my dad. She hadn’t backed down, and I wasn’t going to either.

“Mom?” I whispered. “I’m sorry I forgot about you, but I remember now. All of it. And I’m going to make sure it all comes out.” I made myself get up before I was too scared to move. If she could be brave, then I could. She’d been willing to face down my dad, a guy she loved, because she believed in herself. If I’d inherited her eyes, her riding ability, and her inability to cook, then there was a chance I’d inherited her sense of justice too.

I opened the door to the hall and started walking. I wanted to run, but I was afraid if I started I’d panic and not be able to stop until I ran straight out the front door. I counted the floor tiles as a way to slow myself down. Two tiles per step.

A door in front of me opened. My heart froze in my chest. It was one of the lab workers coming out of the bathroom.

“Oh, hey.” She smiled when she recognized me. “You probably don’t remember me; we met at the summer picnic last year. Volleyball.”

I nodded stiffly.

“You here visiting your dad?”

I knew I should say something, but the best I could do was another nod.

“I think I saw him go into the clinic.” She turned as if she were going to walk me down there.

I made a strangled cry. She turned back. I swallowed the panic down. “I mean, I’m supposed to meet him in his office,” I squeaked out. “I don’t want to bother him.”

“You sure?” She held up her key card. “I can swipe you in.”

“No, thanks.” I smiled again, hoping she would stop being so damned helpful. Did she think she was going to win employee of the month? Was she hoping my dad would see her as useful and give her a promotion complete with a corner office? It was just a matter of time until someone else came along, including my dad, and if that happened, I was in deep shit.

“You want me to keep you company while you wait? Knowing your dad, he could be a while.” She laughed.

“Um. No, thanks. I’m sure you’re busy. Since you came in on the weekend and all.” I took a couple of steps down the hall. “I’ll let you go so you can finish up and get out of here.” I took a few more steps.

“See you again sometime,” she called after me.

I waved and then dodged down the next corridor. I stopped and leaned against the wall. I half expected her to still be tailing after me, but she must have taken the hint.

I reached my dad’s office and nudged the door, letting it swing open silently. He wasn’t there. I shut the door behind me and crossed quickly to his desk. Just like home, his office was a mess. Stacks of files were piled everywhere with papers spilling out. Magazines with dog-eared pages, and what looked like the leftovers from yesterday’s old takeout lunch. My hands ran over the stacks looking for the thumb drive. Nothing.

I double-checked the USB port on his computer, but it was empty. As much as I wanted the thumb drive to suddenly appear, it didn’t. I yanked the desk drawer open and rummaged through the pens, paper clips, loose change, and, for some reason, M&M’s that had spilled out of a bag and were mixed up with everything else.

I ran my hands back over everything again, refusing to believe it. I’d hoped it would be one of those things like sunglasses or keys that go missing, until you realize they’re sitting
on the counter right in front of you. I was so sure he’d have to check out what was on the thumb drive. My dad was the kind of person who sneaked around the house in December to peek at his presents. He read the last chapter of a book before starting it, so he knew how it would end. I didn’t think he’d be able to be patient and wait to see what I’d found. He used to say the reason he was such a great scientist was his insatiable sense of curiosity. Brain itch, he called it.

I stood and walked over to the bookcase, looking over each shelf, hoping to see it, but even as I did, I knew it wouldn’t be there. What if it was still in his pocket? What if for once his sense of curiosity hadn’t gotten the best of him?

Then it came to me. The lab. If he planned to do the procedure on me today, then he would have gone in there. While he was waiting for the equipment to start up, he would have time to look at the data. It had to be there. I said a quick prayer to Saint Thomas More that I was right. Since his statue had almost taken out my best friend, I figured he owed me. I slipped out of my dad’s office and swiped the key card to take me over to the clinic side of the building. The lights were off in the hall. I could hear someone in the medical clinic. It had to be my dad. I slipped off my shoes so they wouldn’t make any sound on the tile. I slid down the hall, ice skating on the waxed floors with my socks.

He was whistling. The sound creeped me out. He planned to wipe out my memory and he was whistling like he was doing
yard work. The medical lab was open on one side, with a long counter. During the day the nurses would sit at the counter looking out over the recovery room. They could do the needed paperwork while keeping an eye on everyone. Sitting in the center of the counter was an open laptop. From the hall I could see the flicker of light. The screen was on. My dad was just beyond the counter in the treatment room. If I walked past, he’d see me.

I crouched down and crawled along the floor. Whenever my dad would stop whistling, I’d freeze and wait for him to start again. Finally I was directly under the counter. I could even hear the cooling fan from the laptop whirring away.

My guts felt like they’d turned into water. I was pretty sure that if I stood up, every one of my organs would pour out. I’d be like the Wicked Witch in
The Wizard of Oz
, who disappeared into a smoking puddle. I was shaking. I wasn’t going to be able to pull this off.

A metal click came from the treatment room. I slid slowly up until my eyes were level with the counter. I could see the shape of my dad moving in the other room. Then I saw it. The thumb drive sticking out of the laptop. Thank you, Saint Thomas More. I reached for it and gave it a small pull. It didn’t budge, but the laptop moved slightly on the counter with a tiny squeak.

I dropped back down to the floor, my heart slamming in my chest. My dad rummaged around in the other room. He
came out into the nurses’ unit. If he rounded the corner, this was going to be quite the surprise. The water cooler gurgled, and he poured himself a glass. Then it was quiet. I couldn’t tell if he was still there or had gone back into the other room. I was shaking so hard I was afraid he would hear me.

An image of Harry flashed in my head. The first time I’d jumped a fence, I’d been terrified. I’d been shaking then too. I was convinced that Harry would throw me and I’d end up with a broken arm or worse. In order to jump, the rider had to lean far forward. If the horse balked, I’d go flying over his head and hit the dirt. I would canter toward the jump and then at the last second lose my nerve and sit back quickly, yanking the reins to stop Harry. Laura told me that day that it was okay to be scared; the important thing was to be scared and do it anyway. I took a slow, deep breath, the same way I did before a show. When jumping, you had to focus on the gate in front of you. Not on the ones that would come later—you had to narrow your focus down so you could concentrate. I didn’t have to think beyond this next step. One thing at a time.

I slid slowly back up and peeked over the counter. No sign of my dad. There was a part of me that wanted to wait until I knew exactly where he was, but just like in jumping I couldn’t hesitate. I had to commit. One hand grabbed the laptop to hold it still and the other yanked out the thumb drive. I shoved it in my bra and dropped back to the floor.

I waited just a beat before crawling for the hall again. I
was certain that if I turned around, Dad would be standing there staring at me. I didn’t let myself even look; I had to have faith this would work. I got to the hall, grabbed my shoes, and sprinted for the door. Holy shit. I’d done it. I had the thumb drive. My hands, which had been steady while I grabbed it, went back to shaking. It was as if now that they knew it was going to be okay, they’d given themselves permission to fall apart.

I heard my dad again down the hall in the treatment room. It was only a matter of time until he finished up in there and went to get me from the conference room. I couldn’t find Josh’s key card. I pulled on the door, but it didn’t move. A sick feeling washed over me. What if the key card had fallen out of my pocket when I was crawling along the floor? I’d had it when I opened the door, so it had to be between here and the lab. Keys don’t disappear.

“Harper?”

My head shot up. Dad was standing down the hall, looking at me in shock. I swallowed. He couldn’t figure out what I was doing there. I must have seemed like a hallucination to him. My hands were sweating, and I rubbed them on my jeans. Then I felt it. I shoved my hand back in my pocket and pulled out Josh’s key card. I must have missed it in my panic. I swiped it against the door and pulled it open.

“Harper, wait,” Dad called out.

I stared him down and slowly shook my head. Then I
turned and ran. I bolted down the main hall without waiting to see if he was coming after me. I skidded around the final corner, still in my socks. Sunshine poured through the glass front doors. I hit the panic bar and spilled outside. I blinked, trying to focus in the bright light, and then I saw him.

Neil ran toward me and pulled me into his arms. I’d made it. We were safe.