Resisting Fate (Predetermined) (18 page)

Sweet Jesus, I knew this was going to happen. Every time I touched him…“Stop,” I growled to myself. Jack laughed, as if he knew what I was thinking. The jerk.

“Fine, but you started it.” He laughed harder.

Chapter Thirteen

Okay, so going with Jack
definitely
wasn’t my brightest idea in the world, especially when he chose the furthest cliff-side in all of Jackson County to take me to. It took us forty-five
miserable
minutes to get to this little hideaway, and it was all done on the back of his Harley…in the freezing cold…with nothing but a sweater on.

Nope, not the most stellar plan by any means. Still, it was beautiful–serene even here, so in a way the cold, ride was worth it.

Jack gripped my elbow to help me off his bike. One of his hands settled on the small of my back and I grinned up at him from under my lashes. I wasn’t above flirting to get what I needed, even though I knew it was pretty damn wrong. Flirting was sort of engrained in me anyway, especially when it was with a guy like Jack-the-sexy-snarky-wolf.

Wow. Did I really think that?

I shook my head. I was definitely in another time warp here because I was not, by any means whatsoever, a girly girl. Still though, I played it up, not a bit ashamed to admit that his weird, tender side was causing me to feel exactly like that. His normal hard ass attitude was getting old anyways, so to see it all go away, if only for a brief period of time, was more than worth the damsel in distress routine on my behalf. His eyes had light in them that I hadn’t seen before, and I didn’t know if it was the mountain-cliff thingy that was causing it, or if he was that mentally unstable with his emotions.

We strolled away from his bike towards the edge of the cliff. Neither of us said anything, and it made the moment all that more perfect. So perfect in fact that I almost forgot that I was now living in a world that was completely unfamiliar to me. Jack’s face was so much more at ease on the other hand, that I tucked my little pocket of angst towards the back of my head, and went with the moment. Whatever that moment was going to bring was fine with me.

He dropped his hand from my back, and immediately my legs wobbled like Jell-O. Damn, I didn’t
literally
want to be needy like that, but the absence of Jack’s warm body pressed into my side was certainly noticeable. I shivered as the cool evening air blew through my thin sweater, watching regrettably as he slipped his hands into the pockets of his jeans. I sighed, I had to get over this obsession, really, really soon.

We walked side by side and a comfortable silence passed between us. I should have been pissed at him for being so ridiculous with me at my house before we left, but he
did
kind of save me too, so I guess that right there was enough of an incentive to forgive him.

The October trees surrounding us were growing thin. Branches appeared lonely as they swayed in the autumn breeze all around us. I took in the view. My breath hitched in my throat as I gazed out at the distant, snow-covered mountains. In all the years that I have lived in Colorado, I’d never once seen a view like this one before. It was amazing.

“So damn beautiful…” Jack murmured from beside me, and I nodded in agreement. When I turned to face him, to finally bring up the questions I had been contemplating on the way over, I discovered that he was not, in fact, talking about the mountain after all.

It was me he was focused on, one hundred and fifty percent.

“Jack?” I questioned softly, tilting my head to the side. My heart began betraying me again with its quick pitter-patter movements. And then he turned, and inched closer. Holy balls, my heart was definitely bordering heart attack speeds again.

“I can’t even believe…” he sighed, brushing a tendril of my hair that had fallen loose from my ponytail, behind my ear. He watched the movement, and I almost wished I could too, but watching him was far better.

Every bit of his caress, every tiny molecule from his skin against mine, sent waves of pleasure throughout my body. I was all of two seconds away from jumping him, right then and there. He sighed after a few more strokes of his hand against my skin, finally backing away to sit down on an outstretched rock nearby. My body was still frozen in place as I tried to figure out what kind of spell he continued to place over me.

“What can’t you believe, Jack?” I whispered as I moved to join him. My breathing was not exactly erratic, but it was pretty, darn close. Slow deep breaths, in through my nose and out through my mouth, I had to remember, I hadn’t come here for this.

“Nothing…never mind.”

“You don’t have to do that, you know…hide things from me constantly. I’m the queen of keeping secrets.” I turned to face him, tucking my hands in between my legs.

“I do, secrets are far better off with me than they are with you anyways…” he nudged my shoulder with his.

I could hear the grin in his voice and I smiled back in return, giggling myself. When in the hell had I turned into a giggler? Without even knowing it, I somehow or another, found my head on top of his shoulder. Crap. I’d crossed the line, big time. This went beyond our kiss. This went beyond the neck licking and sniffing thing too. This was far more…lovey.

He stiffened, I stiffened, but almost in unison, we both relaxed, as our hands connected on his lap. I smiled at the linking. Holding hands with someone had never been more awesome. That’s also when he obviously decided it was time to play spill the beans.

“My dad…he’s a warlock, Emmy. And my mom, she was one of the only female wolf shifters in the U.S.”

“Was?” I tentatively asked, using my thumb to rub circles over his palm. Goose bumps appeared on his arm, and I smiled even bigger. Wolf boy didn’t get cold apparently, but the chills were a different story.

He cleared his throat, “Yeah, she uh, died…when I was four. She was hit by a car one night when she was out running the land by our old house out in Jones County.”

I stopped with the thumb rubbing, and leaned back to look up at him. He gripped my hand tighter. Apparently I wasn’t getting away. I tried not to smile at that movement, because this was definitely not a smiling moment, but it was hard. Damn hard…

“I’m so sorry.”

He shrugged, as he stared down at the brush under our feet. I hated, more than anything, to see him like that, to see him looking almost distraught. He was supposed to be the badass wolf who drove a Harley, not the vulnerable, I wish I could totally kiss your pain away, kind of sweetheart that he was currently representing.

 “Don’t you guys have like, super healing powers or something?”

He snickered, shaking his head to stare back up at me, he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “You read too many books Emmy.”

I tilted my head to the side, studying him. This boy knew how to put on one hell of a front. So what else was he hiding?

“Wolves die like normal people do, unless of course we get medical help, or um…our uh…” he scratched the back of his neck, “… mate is there to help. Mates have the, um, ability…to uh, heal each other.” He dropped my hand, and leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. His eyes never focused on mine.

Good freaking Lord… I couldn’t believe what I was hearing
this
time.

I leaned back, outstretching my stiff legs ahead of me onto the ground. What the hell though, was he being serious here? If so, then I had my answers as to why he was always making me feel better when he touched me. He was apparently healing me! The freakish wolf boy had been healing me all along, and I hadn’t even known it!

Holy freaking balls…we really were mated then, weren’t we?

He lifted his chin to stare out into the valley below us. His jaw tensed. Was he close to cracking even more then he already had? To breaking down the walls that he stood guard with all the time? I could almost hear the
yes
in the air, teasing me, like I could actually read his mind, like his feelings were
my
feelings. His internal battle was my own. And I wanted to fight it, right along with him. Was that also part of our mating-ism? Hell, was mating-ism really a word? And why wasn’t I freaking out even more then I was? Why didn’t I question him about it either? Why did I suddenly
like
the idea of him and I being mated?

“My mom was left to
die
on the side of the road. And nobody bothered to stop and help her, even after her body changed back into human form. The driver he…” he shook his head looking at me momentarily, anger poured off of him in waves, like he was hating
me
, or something.

He clenched his hands into fists. I swallowed, determined not to let his intimidating stare get to me. I held his glare, giving back as much as he gave. He wasn’t telling me something, and it was about time to figure out what the hell that was. He shook his head again, and just like that, his anger dissipated again, replaced with sadness once more. Jeez… He was worse than my mom when she was PMS’ing.

“Apparently, my dad was having heart attack like symptoms the entire time she was lying there…dying. I was too young to help him out, or to understand enough to call anyone for help. My brother was at a friend’s house sleeping over I think. Like I said, I was only four, so I don’t remember hardly anything about that night.”

I really and truly hated this sad version of Jack. It did all sorts of messed up things to my heart. He picked up a stick, peeling off the bark as though it was poison to the tree itself. His head was slung low; a heavy sigh escaped his perfect lips. Yeah, I know, it was a completely inappropriate time to be thinking about kissing, but maybe if I did, then this sad version would go away. Maybe my kisses would heal his heartache like his touch healed my pain.

“How did you find out, I mean that she was gone?” I pulled my lips into my mouth and bit down. I didn’t want to ask that, I knew it would only hurt him more, but I had to. I had to know. I was the nosiest son of a gun to ever hit Louisa, so I had to uphold my job. At least he didn’t seem too bothered by it as he answered.

“Well my dad passed out and didn’t wake up, so I supposedly got really scared and went to the neighbor’s house. They were also a family of shifters, so when they found my dad, they immediately went out looking for my mom.” He threw his head back, his neck craned to where his face was parallel with the sky. His sad gaze became unfocused, and he closed his eyes.

I glanced up there too, but kept my gaze focused on the newly formed, dark clouds above. They were ominous, and hanging low, threatening to cover us with rain I was sure. He sighed again, drawing me back to his face. I blinked away my sadness for him as I stared over at his seemingly lost profile. He appeared to be daydreaming. His eyes were reopened, and he didn’t blink once as he stared out at the view before us.

I didn’t know how to day dream anymore. But I sure as hell knew all about the nightmares. Part of me was tempted to tell him about them, the ones that reoccurred, and haunted me on a nightly basis. That’d be too revealing in the end…and I wasn’t ready to share my own secrets. Sure that made me a hypocrite, but I was good with that label, it was easy on me, easier than the truth. The threatening sky may have very well been an omen, but there was no way I’d let it stand in my way of making progress with this obviously tormented boy.

“Then what happened, Jack?”

He jerked, as if he had forgotten I was there at all, settling his hands on the rock behind him as he turned back to me. His eyes were as bright as ever and I shivered at their intensity. Was this boy ever
not
intense? “They found my mom’s body fairly quickly because it was supposedly only a mile or so from our house. By the time they got her back to my dad, she was already gone. My dad on the other hand…well, he wasn’t gone…physically at least.”

I cocked my head to the side as I stared back at him. What had he meant by that cryptic line, “What do you mean
at least
? Why would he be gone, he wasn’t the one hurt?”

His face paled, anxiousness and hesitation passed through his eyes as he spoke, “When one half of a mated pair is dying or dead, or is somehow even attempting to break the bond with their mate…then the other mate literally loses their mind…or even their will to live.”

I pushed my brows together in confusion.
Ooookaaay…

“First, the remaining mate goes through the physical symptoms of the lost bond, like they have this awful chest ache that won’t go away, or maybe a headache that goes on for hours or days even. Then when the dying mate’s heart finally stops beating, or the bond is completely severed, the craziness sets in on the mate that’s left behind. Fear, anxiety, hatred, anger, revenge… The need to murder someone…”