Revealed (21 page)

“You don’t think you deserve her forgiveness, do you?”

“I know I do not.” He bowed his head slightly to her. “Stand watch over your friend. I will disturb you no longer.” Then he faded into the darkness.

Shaunee turned back to the pyre and raised her other hand. She took a step even closer, closed her eyes, and let her element flood through her, and as she did so she spoke a prayer that lifted with the smoke to Nyx.

“Goddess, this is my good-bye to Erin. I know she’s with you, and finally at peace. Thank you for loving her and taking care of her. Also, thank you for loving Kalona and taking care of him, too, because no matter what, I know you don’t just turn your back on the people you love.”

“You think you’re so fucking much better than me, don’t you?”

Dallas’s voice jolted her, and Shaunee couldn’t say anything for several moments while she controlled her element. The flaming pyre reflected her shock, and had Shaunee not focused and brought it under control, its natural course would have been to consume Dallas.

When she had her element under control again and was able to turn her attention to Dallas, the stupid kid was just standing there, smirking at her and looking like the dickwad he was, totally oblivious to the fact that she had just saved his idiot life.

“No, Dallas, I don’t think I’m better than you. The truth is, I don’t think much about you at all,” she said.

“Erin thought you were an uptight bitch,” he said.

Shaunee bit her lip instead of lashing out at him. She could have fried him with her fire,
or
with her words. But she didn’t want to do either, especially over Erin’s pyre. So, she thought about it for a long, uncomfortable moment, and then said the nicest thing she could think of. “Are you sure you knew what Erin really thought about anything?”

“I fucked her! Of course I knew what she thought.” He took a couple of steps out of the shadows toward Shaunee, and his smirk became a sneer. “Unless you’re tellin’ me you used to fuck her, too.”

Shaunee stared at him, too shocked by the mean ignorance in his words to know what to say.

“Shiiiiit! I knew you two were abnormally close. You did fuck her! And she didn’t even tell me. That’s a damn shame. The three of us, we could’ve had a good time.”

The flame that had been building inside Shaunee turned white hot. Her mind cleared. She trapped Dallas with one look.

“I didn’t like you when you were with Stevie Rae. You always felt wrong to me. Plus, you’re too short,” she couldn’t help adding. Then she refocused and made herself tell the truth, without name-calling or spiteful comments. She channeled fire, but instead of burning him, Shaunee scorched him with the truth. “For her entire life, Erin’s biggest desire was to find anybody, anything, who could make her
feel something.
You were just the last in a long list of anybodies. I understood how vulnerable and messed up she was, and I really cared about her, even after she wasn’t my best friend anymore. If you really cared about her, you’ll show it by staying here with me until sunrise and respecting her memory, even though she’s gone.”

Dallas couldn’t seem to look away from her. His eyes filled with tears and then overflowed. Shaunee thought she might have glimpsed the real boy for a second—the boy who might have actually been able to love Erin. Then he blinked and wiped his cheeks with the back of his sleeve. His lip curled. “You’re as stupid as Erin used to say you were. I can’t stay here until sunrise. I’m a
red
vampyre. The sun will burn me up.”

Shaunee’s element filled and calmed her. She would not return his hateful words with more poison. “You always know when it is dawn. You could stay until just before the sun rises, and then leave. I’ll wait the rest of the time with her. Erin would appreciate it.”

“I thought you said I was just the last in a long list of anybodies,” he said.

“I shouldn’t have said that—it was mean of me, and it’s not right to fight over Erin’s pyre. Dallas, I’m sorry.”

His laugh was sarcastic. “You’re not sorry, you’re
weak.
Erin knew that when she left you. Just like I knew it when I left Stevie Rae.”

“You didn’t leave Stevie Rae. Stevie Rae fell in love with Rephaim. She left you, and you couldn’t handle it. That’s when you turned to Darkness, and you’re still turned there.”

“Fuck Stevie Rae! Fuck all of you! Your friends are the reason Erin’s dead!” Dallas yelled, taking a threatening step toward her.

Shaunee lifted one hand. A wall of heat channeled through her, crackling between them. Shielding his face with his arm, Dallas staggered away. “You’ll pay for what you’ve done! You’ll all pay for what you’ve done!”

“That kid is gonna be hurtin’ for certain tomorrow,” Stark said as he came into Zoey’s old dorm room. There were only ten minutes or so until dawn, and he felt dragged to the ground by weariness deep within him.

“That took you forever. I was really getting worried you wouldn’t be back before sunrise,” Zoey said, sitting up in bed and putting down the book she’d been reading.

“Yeah, sorry. I couldn’t just leave him all messed up like that.” He smiled at Z and went over to the sink. “Is Shaunee okay?”

Zoey looked annoyed at the question. “Yeah, she seems fine. Well, she’s sad and all, but that’s normal. She’s staying with the pyre until after the sun rises. I guess Dallas came by and made some kind of stupid scene, which is totally like him, but Shaunee handled it.”

“You didn’t think you needed to stay with her?”

“Shaunee? At the pyre?” Zoey frowned at him.

“Yeah. You are her High Priestess.”

“Well, technically, as long as we’re stuck here at the House of Night, Thanatos is her High Priestess, not me. And Shaunee said she told Thanatos she wanted to stay by the pyre by herself. Thanatos respected her wishes—I figured I should, too. Do you have a problem with that?”

Stark cupped water in his hands, rinsing soap out of his face while he tried to figure out how to talk to Z. She’d been so damn touchy since the whole thing on the balcony had happened showing that Aurox was Heath and Heath was Aurox. It made him feel like he was living with a porcupine!

“No,” he finally said. “No problem with it at all. Z, I wasn’t trying to fight with you. I just wanted to know about Shaunee.”

“Erin’s funeral’s over. Shaunee’s fine. That’s about it. I want to know what really happened with Aurox and those human boys. I couldn’t tell what the hell Heath was talking about.”

Stark’s stomach tightened. “You mean Aurox.”

“Yeah, Aurox.” Zoey frowned. “That’s what I said. So, what’s going on?”

Stark was too tired to argue with her, so he ignored her Freudian slip, even though it made his heart hurt. “Two guys somehow found a hole in the school’s wall—not very far from here, actually. They were drinking and looking for hot vampyres.” That’s about it.” He repeated her words, pulled his shirt off, and started to brush his teeth.

“Stark, seriously? You’re leaving out massive details.”

He shrugged, and spoke through the toothbrush, hoping she’d get the clue and stop with the interrogation. “No big deal. I used my red vamp superpowers to make them believe I was a cop and that they got lucky. I didn’t haul them to jail, charge them with public intoxication, and call their parents. And they think the House of Night is on my patrol, so I’ll be looking for them every night from here on out, which means they won’t be back.”

“Well, that’s good.”

She didn’t say anything else for as long as it took him to finish brushing his teeth and get in bed, but he knew from the way she was chewing her lip and scrunching her forehead that she had lots more to say. Plus, he could feel her tension. He could always feel her tension. He realized he should rub her shoulders and try to get her to relax, but he couldn’t quite get past the
reason
for her tension.

Aurox was Heath. Zoey loved Heath.

And that hurt Stark’s feelings and made him feel like shit.

So, he lay down next to her and blew out the little flicking gas lamp, wishing with everything inside him that Zoey would curl up on his shoulder and put her arms around him and tell him he didn’t need to worry about her wanting to be with Aurox or Heath or
anyone except him.

Instead, from the darkness, Zoey said, “Why was he out there?”

Stark sighed. “He was running around the school wall. I didn’t really get why, and he was too wasted to explain it to me.”

“Running shuts off his mind,” Zoey said.

“How do you know?”

There was a short silence, and he could almost hear her thinking, then she said, “It’s what Heath used to do when he had a problem. He’d run himself exhausted and it would shut off his mind.”

“Oh,” Stark said, feeling shittier by the moment.

“Where is he now?” she asked.

“In the basement passed out,” Stark said.

“I didn’t think he slept.”

“He may not, but I can promise you he passes out.”

“Did you turn him on his side so he won’t choke if he pukes?”

“No, but feel free to go tuck him in yourself if you’re so damn worried about him.”

“Stark, I was just—”

“I know what you were
just.
I know the whole thing, Zoey. That’s the problem.”

“You don’t need to get mad at me,” she said.

“I’m not mad. I’m tired. The sun’s coming up and I gotta sleep. Good night.” Stark rolled on his side. His back to her, he curled in on himself, wishing that she’d put her arms around him and pull him to her and tell him everything was going to be okay—that they’d figure this thing out
together.

Instead he heard her say a soft, “’Night.” He felt the bed shift as she rolled away from him.

Stark had never been so glad to give himself over to the pull of the sun and the dreamless sleep dawn brought with it.

It was always so dang hard to say bye to Rephaim. Stevie Rae rolled over, alone in her bed. She was exhausted—the sun had risen a few minutes ago, and every moment she fought the need to sleep it drained her. But she was really having a hard time shutting off her mind. She couldn’t stop thinking about how much she wished that Rephaim was there with her. She didn’t mean to be ungrateful, but after Erin’s funeral, Thanatos breaking with the High Council, Nicole swearing allegiance to her (
her!
), not to mention Neferet being who-the-heck-ever-knows-where, she would’ve really,
really
liked to snuggle up in Rephaim’s arms and feel safe and loved.

Instead she’d said bye to him outside a little bit before sunrise and then come up to the room she was sharing with Shaunee. Stevie Rae had taken the bed nearest the big picture window, even though that wasn’t the smartest choice. Their room faced east and got full sunshine in the morning. If they didn’t have blackout drapes she’d be like bacon frying in a skillet.

But they did have blackout drapes—big, thick dark ones. They were so heavy and so firmly tied together that even though Stevie Rae left the window open all day long while she slept, the strongest breeze didn’t cause them to move. That was a good thing, because she would always leave her window open. What if Rephaim needed to come to her? What if he got in some kind of trouble when he was a raven and needed a safe place to hide? She wanted to believe that something of the boy she loved remained deep within him, even when he was a beast.

That’s why she wished he’d let her stay and watch him change into a raven. She’d thought a lot about it, and she might try to touch him—to tame him. “
After all,
” she’d told him the day after the Goddess had forgiven Rephaim and gifted him with the form of a human boy during the hours between sunset and sunrise, “
I tamed a beast once before. Maybe I can do it again!”
She’d expected Rephaim to smile and laugh, like he usually did—he seemed so happy around her. But he hadn’t. He’d gotten all serious and taken her hands in his and said, “
When I was a Raven Mocker I had some humanity within me. You have to remember I am different now. When I’m a boy, like now, I’m completely human. When I’m a raven, I’m nothing but a beast. I don’t know you. I don’t know me. I know only the sky and the need to ride the wind.”

That had scared her. And she’d told him so. She didn’t hide stuff from Rephaim—they were too close for that.

“But you always come back to me. Doesn’t that mean something of you is still inside the raven?”

He’d looked sad, but he’d told her the truth like they’d promised.
“When I am a raven I am a beast. I don’t know love. I don’t know you. Please don’t make it into something it’s not.”

“But you come back to me!”

“Stevie Rae.”
He’d cupped her face in his hands
. “I think that’s just because of Nyx’s magick.”

“Like she put a GPS in you so you could find me?”

“GPS?”

“Modern magick that helps you find your way home.”

He’d grinned.
“Yes! Nyx put a GPS inside me so I can find you.”

Stevie Rae kicked off her blanket and looked at Shaunee’s empty bed. She should try to stay awake and be sure Shaunee was okay. It would be terrible to lose her best friend, and even though Erin and Shaunee had been having problems, that didn’t change the fact that up until just a few weeks ago, they had been inseparable for the entire time they’d been at the House of Night. There was a big difference between fighting with your BFF and having your BFF die.

Stevie Rae’s mind automatically went back to the night Erin had coughed up her life’s blood and died. Zoey had been with her every second. It’d helped. Shaunee being there for Erin had to have helped her, too. And now Shaunee was doing the right thing—she was watching over her friend’s pyre until after dawn.

Stevie Rae rolled over and stared at the blackout curtain, trying to keep her eyes open—trying to fight the energy drain that happened naturally to red fledglings and vampyres when the sun was in the sky. It wasn’t
impossible
for her to stay conscious during the day. It was just hard. Really hard. Her eyelids fluttered. Maybe she’d rest for just a little while. She’d hear Shaunee come in and wake up again and check on her…