Road to Redemption (7 page)

“How do you know what I want?”

“I’m not looking for a girlfriend,” he continued.

“Who said I was asking?”

Maybe he could shock her. “Or a lover.”

“Me neither,” she replied without batting an eye.

“What do you want from me?”  He really needed to know. Maybe she
was
looking for the same thing he was, something casual.

“How about being your friend?” She grinned. “For now.”

Nope, guess not. “I don’t need another friend.”

“Sure you do. Everyone could use another friend,” she stated and reached over, placing her small hand over his large one on the seat.

He sighed.  And let her hold onto his hand.

***

“Brooke, he’s so sad. I want to help him,” Cori said the next afternoon when Brooke dropped her car off.

“You can’t help everyone, Cori,” Brooke pointed out.

“I don’t want to help everyone. I want to help
him
.”

“Why? What is so special about Jack? Besides the obvious hotness,” Brooke mocked when she saw Cori’s knowing look.

“And the heartburn. Don’t forget the heartburn,” Cori added with a grin.  “Honestly, I don’t know. Anyone else I would write off.  But I told you. Something is pulling me toward him.  I can’t explain it. But there it is. And you know me, I’m going with it,” she said on a more positive note.

“How are you planning on doing that? Your week in Orthopedics is over, right?”

“Yeah,” she said with a pout. “Guess I need to try to get creative. I mean it took me five days to get a smile and a grin out of him. But hey,” she added excitedly, “I held his hand last night in the truck.”

“What are you in elementary school? At the rate you’re going, you might even get a hug out of him by summer,” she said, teasing an eye roll out of Cori.

“Oh, I bet I can get more than a hug out of him. And by the end of the year, too.  Now I’ve got a goal. I just need a game plan,” Cori said, rubbing her hands together with glee.

***

Watching the NY Giants trounce his home team, the Carolina Panthers, Jack was forced to admit the game held little interest to him.  Relaxing back in his recliner after getting himself a beer and the bag of chips he had purchased earlier when he finally forced himself to the store, he thought back to the ride home with Cori last night.

The only other person who ever cared about his happiness was Tracy.  He’d always thought he was happy in life.  He enjoyed being alone. He didn’t understand why everyone was so intent on pushing him to talk more, or smile. 

Just because he didn’t talk or smile didn’t mean he wasn’t happy, or didn’t enjoy life. He loved his career. He’d worked hard to be where he was. It was exactly what he wanted out of his life. So he was happy. 

He really didn’t mind being lonely. He didn’t understand why no one believed him. And he had to stop referring to himself as lonely, because he wasn’t. He liked being alone and that was totally different than being lonely.

Absently he sent a chip flying in the air to Roxy, who had been patiently waiting for him to share.  He shook his head as he watched her nip it out of the air and swallow it whole. He really was going to have to pay more attention to the size of the food he shared with her.

“I’m not alone, am I Roxy?” he asked her, even though she really didn’t have a clue as to what he was saying. “And neither are you, because you’ve got me. We’ve got each other.”

She continued to stare at the hand that was reaching into the bag for another chip. “Who am I kidding? You don’t care who you have as long as they feed you,” he said with another toss of the chip.

She snagged it out of the air, crunched this one once and swallowed. When she was done she came over and placed her head on his thigh, her big brown eyes searching his as if she could read his thoughts.  He reached out and absently rubbed his palm over the top of her fawn-colored head, then scratched behind her ears, causing her jowls to widen into what he considered her doggie grin.

Roxy stepped back when he reached his hand in the bag for another chip and he noticed she left a big wet spot on his jeans from her drool.  And were those crumbs mixed in with the spit?

“It’s a good thing you have me,” he chided her. “You’re a slob. No one else would want you. But I don’t mind,” he said, smiling back at her and tossing another chip in the air.

When he realized he was smiling, thoughts of Cori popped back into his head.  He really hoped he didn’t regret requesting her to fill in for the rest of year.  She had made his office run smoothly. More smoothly than it had ever run before. His patients even seemed happier to see him.  But after last night he started to worry she would think more of it than it was.

He was going to have to find a way to stay away from her, which he admitted, was going to be next to impossible.  So he would have to work harder at discouraging her. Because he was right when he told her last night he can’t give her want she wants.  Or what she deserves.

Progression with Jack was going at a snail’s pace. Cori had been so excited when she found out that she’d been assigned to the Orthopedic Department until the end of the year.

That gave her three weeks to reach him.  Three weeks in his presence to get him to smile. To get him to be happier. To get him to kiss her if she was lucky. Because that was her new goal. 

She had seen the way he looked at her at Brooke’s party, and now she knew he was as attracted to her as she was to him.

But halfway through the second week of her three-week extension she was nowhere closer to her goals.  Matter of fact, she was pretty sure she was further behind than when she had started.

If she had seen him a total of two hours that first week that would have been a lot. And she’d talked to him maybe five minutes tops when added all up.  Those one-word responses didn’t take up much time at all.

Short of turning around and running in the opposite direction when he saw her, he most likely wouldn’t have talked to her at all if given the choice.

And she knew exactly what he was doing. He was avoiding her. 

She had been so positive he was the one who had requested the three-week extension. After the drive home in the snow she had thought she was getting to him. He’d smiled at her. He’d let her hold his hand, sort of.

But now she was having doubts.  She highly doubted he put in for her extension after all, and most likely was annoyed when he saw her in his office last Monday morning.  Hence the reason he was avoiding her.

She closed the door behind Mrs. Gutler, yet again. Cori was right. The older woman was definitely lonely.

See, Cori thought, she didn’t even have to try and she figured out Mrs. Gutler’s problem and now was helping her. Just because Mrs. Gutler still came in as often didn’t mean she wasn’t nicer when she did. She didn’t seem to be so demanding of Jack anymore either. She only wanted company. 

Cori’s pace slowed on the way down the hall when she heard an all too familiar nasally voice in the reception area. “Hi, I heard Cori was stationed here this week. Is she available for me to hand her some samples and go over them with her?”

Damn, Cori thought. How did he find out where she was? And why did he always want to talk to her? Sometimes being overly friendly wasn’t a good thing. 

When she heard the receptionist ask him to follow her back while she looked, Cori made a split second decision and dashed for the supply closet.  Without thought, she wrenched it open and backed in, closing the door behind her—and bumping right into Jack. 

“What the–?” he asked, then stopped at the wild look and the finger in front of Cori’s lips shushing him.

“He’s out there. I need to hide for a minute until he’s gone.  So be quiet. Please?” she demanded in a whisper, then locked the door from the inside for good measure.

“Who’s out there?” Jack asked curiously.

“Stewart, the pharmaceutical rep.  I don’t know how he does it, but he always knows where I am. And he always makes a point of asking for me.  He keeps hinting that he wants to ask to me out, and he
won’t
take the hint I’m not interested,” she rushed out.

Jack gave her a knowing look that Cori interpreted as “shoe is on the other foot now.”  “It’s not the same thing and you know it,” she told him simply.

There was no use arguing with her, and she knew he wasn’t about to try. He had done his damnedest to avoid her at all costs, but she wasn’t letting him off the hook easily. She knew his game and she was going to push a bit harder.  And here he was stuck in a supply closet with her. Alone. With the door locked.  She could see the panic was starting to set in, as he seemed to realize the same thing.  Those deep brown eyes looked at her, and she grinned. 

“This is ridiculous,” he said, reaching for the handle.

They both heard the receptionist address Stewart. “I know she’s here somewhere.  Hang on for a second, I’ll go check the break room.”

Dang, Cori thought, he’s close to the supply closet door. “I’ll give you my M&M’s,” she rushed out in desperate whisper.

“Huh?” His hand had stopped moving toward the door.

What was wrong with her? She never gave up candy. But she was desperate. Too late, she saw the wicked gleam come into his eyes and knew she had just given him the upper hand.

“What makes you think I like M&M’s?” he asked with a smirk.

“I saw you getting them out of the vending machine last week.”

“Crap,” he mumbled. She had seen him looking around guiltily when he was purchasing them, thought he was being so clever hiding his chocolate craving, but he couldn’t hide from her. “So?” he said warily.

“So what? Come on, I’m desperate, please?” As much as she hated to give him the upper hand, she was running out of options. It was Jack or Stewart. Hands down she would rather give Jack the upper hand right now. Or let him think he had it.

“Fine. Hand them over now.”

“I don’t have them with me,” she lied pathetically, sticking her bottom lip out.

“You’re never without M&M’s.  Hand them over now, or I open the door and point Stewart in your direction,” he said, his hand reaching for the door again.

“You don’t play fair.” She pouted while she pulled the brown bag of candies out of the front pocket of her scrubs.  “Here,” she said, placing them in his open hand.

“These are half gone,” he accused her, palming the half-empty bag.

“Well, I didn’t say a full bag. I said my M&M’s, and those are my M&M’s.”

“I can’t seem to find Cori. She must have gone on break. Do you have a card for me to give her?” the receptionist asked from behind the door.

“Sure. Actually, is Dr. Reynolds here? I haven’t met him yet and this might be a good time if he’s available?” the persistent rep asked.

The receptionist directed Stewart to follow her toward Jack’s office.

Cori felt Jack stiffen.  She could only imagine how much he hated to be bothered by reps and salespeople.  It was her turn to smile and give him some grief. “Well, thanks. I appreciate you helping me,” she said with a smile and reached to unlock the door at her back.

His hand landed on hers. “Wait.”

“What?” she asked innocently, raising her voice a bit now and enjoying how uncomfortable he seemed to be getting.

“You know what,” he whispered. “I helped you, you can help me.”

“Ahh.” She grinned. “But I gave you my M&M’s. We’re even.”

He sighed. “I’ll give them back.”

Maybe she could make a little more progress here.  Because this was the most he had ever talked to her. This was getting good. “Nope. Not interested. I’ll go buy another bag,” she added. “Or better yet, maybe I’ll get gummy bears instead. Something different.”

He stiffened. “What do you want?” he asked, reverting back to whispering.

“A smile. Genuine, like you mean it. A smile that reaches your eyes and lets me see your dimples.”

He frowned.

“That is an upside down smile. Turn it around,” she ordered him. The situation was hopeless, but she crossed her fingers. And it worked. That last comment was so ridiculous, added to the entire situation they were in, he actually complied.

Her breath caught, she wasn’t expecting him to do it.  Who would have thought he would do it? And mean it, because he did. His eyes crinkled, his dimples appeared and his lips parted in a wide smile.  She melted. Her heart gave a pang and dropped into her stomach. Her own grin widened and her eyes glazed over.

She saw his eyes deepen, lust spring into them. With her own wide eyes on his face, she read his intent as he leaned toward her and she subconsciously lifted up on her tiptoes to meet him halfway. They were a breath way, a breath away from his lips touching hers, when they heard the doorknob turn. Both of them jumped back apart. Thankfully, the door was locked.

Nothing could be heard but their heavy breathing.

He was the first to speak once they realized that whoever was on the other side of the door was gone. “I, ah, need to get to my patients.” He reached past her and unlocked the door. She knew she still had a dreamy look in her eyes, still filled with passion. He hurriedly ordered, “Stay here for a minute. I’ll leave first.”

He stuck his head out; the hallway was empty, so he stepped out and left the door slightly ajar as it had been before she locked them in there together.

***

What was the hell was he thinking? He almost kissed her in the supply closet, he thought, making his way to an exam room.  He’d been doing so well avoiding her all week.  He knew he had to stay away from her. But it didn’t seem to matter.  Nothing had changed. He was still attracted to her. Maybe even more now.

There had been no way to have her assignment changed the last minute. He thought about doing it, but then remembered how well his office had run and decided he could handle it.  And he was. Until now.

He wouldn’t let this change anything. She still wasn’t for him.  She had complication written all over her. She wasn’t like the women he’d been with the last two years when he was looking for a release and a release only.  Then he went about his life until he couldn’t hold off again. 

He convinced himself it was fine. Those women knew what he was about. They knew the rules upfront and they had no expectations, either. They were out for fun themselves.  It wasn’t like he did it often, a few times a year.  It didn’t make him a bad person, just human. With human needs.

Only he felt bad afterward.  It wasn’t who he was.  Or, if he were honest with himself, what he wanted. Because deep down he was afraid he really did want what Cori was offering. He wanted to see her smile. Hear her laugh.  See her try to get a laugh out of him. But he didn’t want the heartache that came with it. Because he knew it would.

He wasn’t a romantic. Or a Prince Charming. Or anything even remotely close.

He had a career, and he worked all the time.  They would hardly ever see each other. And when they did see each other, he would be tired and want to relax. He couldn’t give her what she wanted, or deserved. He couldn’t give her the good time she was used to having. It wasn’t him no matter how much he tried, and it would never be him. 

He tried it once, thought he could make it work, but in the end he still failed.

If he had been around more, if he had paid attention more, he would have seen. He would have seen what was going on with Tracy. But instead he was so self-absorbed in his own life, in his own career. 

When they had time together, Tracy was more focused on going out and having fun with him. Spending time together, and doing all the things he wasn’t often around to do, that he never noticed the change in her.  Not until it was too late.

***

Cori was having a much different reaction to the “almost kiss”—as she was going to refer to it from now on.  Wow, when he smiled at her, she thought she was going to dissolve into a puddle on the floor.  Who would have thought a smile could be so sexy? But it was. No doubt about it. 

Fanning herself with her hand, because she felt like she was burning up, she jumped when the door opened wider.

“Cori?” one of the other nurses asked her. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Sorry, a hot flash. It’s cooler in here so I popped in quick and was fanning myself.” She lied through her teeth but added a grin for good measure. “I’m better now. Thanks for asking.” Then she dashed out of the closet like she was on fire.

***

“Sorry I’m late,” Brooke said, climbing on the stationary bike next to Cori later that day. “My conference call ran later than I thought.”

“I’ve been waiting forever for you to get here,” she accused Brooke.

With a frown Brooke asked, “Why? Everything alright?”

Cori looked around wildly, then leaned in and whispered excitedly, “Jack almost kissed me.”

“What? When?”

“Today, in the supply closet.” Brooke frowned, but Cori hurried on. “Sorry Ms. HR Professional.  Don’t think of it from a work point of view. Think of it from a best friend point of view.  Or if you can’t separate the two, then think of it as almost-but-didn’t-happen-so-it-doesn’t-count on your end. I’ll think of it as almost-and-it-most-certainly-does-count on my end,” she said with a grin for good measure.

Brooke shook her head. Sometimes she couldn’t process the things that came out of Cori’s mouth when she was so excited.  Her words all raced together in her excitement to get it all said. “OK. Well, for one, though in theory kissing at work isn’t professional, I’ve been guilty of it myself. What?” She stopped at Cori’s shocked expression. “Do you really think Lucas wouldn’t have tried to kiss me at some point behind closed doors here? Anyway.” Brooke waved her hand. “I’ll think of it from a best friend’s point of view. So tell me how it was almost a kiss.”

Cori proceeded to explain the situation to her and then ended with a sigh. “It was so close, Brooke, I mean
so
close. And then he got called into surgery an hour later and I haven’t seen him since.  It stinks now. Because you know I want to keep pushing when I’m gaining ground. And, boy, was I gaining ground.”