Rough Road Home (The Circle D series) (29 page)

How badly do you want it?
Tom’s words echoed through her mind. How badly? Desperately. Only it had held different connotations for each of them. The day she’d stood across from one of the most influential financial advisers in Denver, the power of the Spirit had filled her. She’d been given one more chance to choose. She knew how badly she wanted the peace of contentment and understanding. She chose to go get it.

Rachel rubbed her face into the fabric of her denim jacket. She lifted her head and looked around at the steadfast homestead she called home, the rugged barns filled with freshly baled hay and listened to the lowing of the cattle in the pens.

Never would she regret her choice.

As she stared at a smattering of steers in the lower field, a cloud of dust drifted along their dirt lane. The dark colored truck slowly picked along the road. Rachel wracked her brain to remember who’d be coming out today. Family and friends planned on gathering tomorrow to celebrate Thanksgiving at the Hill ranch. A celebration fit for the homecoming of his daughter, her dad had claimed. Even Uncle Mitch was joining them. If she knew her neighbors, not a single wife, mother or daughter was venturing far from the kitchen today in preparation for the feast.

Recognition dawned as the familiar black, full-ton pickup she’d driven for a month came closer.

“Nick Davidson.” Her voice caught, keeping her from saying more. His boyish grin and killer kisses had hounded her days and invaded her dreams since the day she’d left Hawk Ridge. Impetus from an unseen hand urged her toward her visitor. He stepped from the cab and slammed the door behind him.

“Hi, you.” The wind tousled his thick, blond hair before he clamped on his dark hat, the chill bringing instant color to his healed features. Yellow and purple bruises had disappeared revealing wind-reddened cheeks, a pair of piercing blue eyes, and a double sided grin--not a hint of swelling in sight. Rachel drank in the broad shoulders, narrow hips, and familiar stance while she fought to keep her heart from pounding out of her chest.

“Hey, cowboy. This is Oklahoma. We’re a far cry from Las Vegas.” Nick filled the empty places in her heart, but old fears for his safety stole the joy from her. She huddled deeper into the folds of her jacket. If he’d come to ask her support for his ride at the Finals, she stood ready to stand her ground.

Ignoring her comment, he leaned against the cab door and cocked his head. “You left Denver. I had a hard time tracking you down, your former employer wasn’t very helpful.” A twinkle lit his eyes as Nick shared his lopsided grin. “I finally conned Maddie into showing mercy to an old, broken-down cowboy.”

“Ah, bless her heart.” Rachel rolled her eyes. “Broken-down cowboy, my foot.”

He stepped away from the truck and held out his hand. Rachel stared at his offer, the memory of his warm palm on the small of her back sending a shiver down her spine. His fingertips tracing her cheek; the brush of his lips on hers. Emotions swirled around her as her mouth went dry.
Lord, help me here. I’m fading.

Nick lowered his hand, tucked it into the pocket of his jeans and offered her his elbow. “Walk with me?”

A clothed arm she could handle. She dug her fingertips into the worn denim jacket so familiar to her touch. Her lungs filled with his scent as she tugged him across the dirt driveway toward the corrals. “Let’s talk over here, out of the wind.”

With the barn protecting them, Rachel stopped by the rail of the corral. She released him and placed her hands on the metal rails. Cattle milled around the pen, curious over the newcomers. Rachel tapped her finger as she searched her mind for neutral topics of conversation. “How are your headaches?”

“Fine.” He rested his elbows on the railing beside her and propped one booted foot on the bar second from the bottom. Silence encircled them, creating a smaller, intimate world that encompassed just the two of them. Rachel leaned her hip against the fence panel.

“Kacie and Krynn entered the world kicking and screaming. Gabe’s going to have his hands full.”

“How’s Melanie?”

“Physically fine and sage as ever.”

“Sage?”

Nick shrugged as if shaking away some errant thought. “She’s got this mothering thing down to a science, even beyond Jason and the twins.” A burst of off-course wind whipped around them, ruffling the blond edges that stuck out from beneath his hat. “She told me she tried not to interfere in others’ affairs, but for the life of her, couldn’t figure out how a smart guy like me couldn’t see the sunshine for the rain.”

The thought of sparing insightful words for anyone while dealing with a couple of crying babies completely escaped Rachel’s imagination. “Maybe she’s just the kind to mother all children whether they’re hers or not.”

His brow shot up at her assessment before he turned to gaze across the open pasture. “Funny how perspective changes when you’re holding a baby. Concern for that precious little life consumes you until the smallest things take center stage like “‘Am I holding her right?’”

“The helpless always depend on the strong.” The image of Nick holding a tiny baby brought a grin to her face. “Uncle Nick.”

“Melanie’s a straightforward kind of girl. When we got done hashing out my life, there wasn’t too much there to be proud of.”

“As Uncle Mitch always says ‘The Lord can’t do nuthin’ with you until you hit rock bottom.’”

“In more ways than one.” Nick continued to stare across the field, the muscles in his jaw bunching rhythmically. “I hit bottom the moment you left.”

Her too, but there wasn’t anything she could do about it. Rachel swallowed the knot in her throat. She couldn’t help Nick until the Lord worked on him first.

“I hugged my sister-in-law and felt my soul break the bonds of years of lies.”

She perked. “Lies?”

He shifted around until his back rested against the metal rails of the panel. Tiny lines appeared around his eyes, his gaze tender despite being intense. “My conscience, Rachel. I gave up on Christ. I’d given up on the Truth.” He extended his arm toward her.

Slipping into the warmth of his embrace, she closed her eyes and listened to the beating of his heart that kept perfect time with her own. She wrapped her arms around his waist and never wanted to let go.

His lips brushed across the top of her head. “You’ve changed your address, sweetheart. Want to tell me about it?”

Suddenly, she wanted to tell him all about it.

“The city didn’t have the answers I was looking for.” She reached up and plucked at the stitching around the pocket of his jacket. “Since my job prospects are few, I’ll be working for Uncle Mitch again. He said I was the best mucker he’d ever had. The PRCA tour begins in January, so”–-she took a deep breath–-“I came home.”

“Nice place.” He looked around. “Oil derricks, cattle and windmills. Yep, you’ve got it all.”

She felt around her collar and clutched the tiny cross in her hand. “I do now. Dad and I have done a lot of talking. I was so wrong about him and his motives for leaving the family, for leaving me. He hadn’t put the rodeo first, he’d put God first. The pieces of the puzzle finally came together.” She eased her grip on her necklace and drew a deep breath.

“Dad and Uncle Mitch used to work together as a team for the Fellowship of Christian Cowboys. I barely remember those Sunday mornings when Bud Hill walked around the arena recruiting cowboys to attend church, it must have been quite a sight. When I got old enough to go to school, Mom and I couldn’t follow the circuit with him anymore. In my childish desires to keep him to myself, I overlooked my dad’s call to feed the Lord’s sheep--even amongst the bulls. Dad had made his decision for Christ, Mom understood and supported his decision. I was stubborn and willful and I wanted my dad. I filled in the blanks with my own, faulty reasoning.”

Nick hugged her close. “You were a little kid, Rachel. Didn’t anyone explain things to you?”

She nodded but kept her cheek pressed against his warmth. “Sure they tried, Uncle Mitch especially. He always told me Dad had to follow his calling. In my mind, calling equated to bull riding.” She kicked the toe of her boot into the dirt. “I’ve wasted a lot of years protecting my hardened heart.”

She stopped fidgeting and looked up into the crystal blue eyes so full of compassion. “You know what the Bible says about love? ‘When I was a child I spoke and thought as a child, and when I grew up, I put aside childish things?’ Well, I’ve grown up.”

“Yes, you certainly have.” He tucked her close beside him. “I wanted to find you.”

“It was time I came home.” Her heartbeat quickened at the concession.

The light in his eyes held true as his humor faded. “Me, too.”

Her vivid imagination accelerated her heart beat. Over the past weeks, she’d played out every scenario possible where their futures intertwined. Sadly, none of them had a happy ending. She tamped down her excitement, careful not to allow her head free rein once more. “Where’s your home, Nick?”

“I have a great family.” As if drawing courage on a deep breath, his voice grew strong. “A great life. I’ve rediscovered the love of Christ in my life, and to Him, I’ve surrendered all. Why should I risk losing everything just to ride an ornery old bull?” He nudged her forehead with his chin until she looked up. “Which, by the way, I never lied about. I
am
done bull riding.”

Heat spread across her face. “I heard you tell the doctor you wouldn’t miss the Finals for the world,” she protested.

“If you’re going to make eavesdropping a habit, you better learn to do it right.” He cuffed her shoulder with his fist. “I’ve got tickets in my pocket for all ten days of the National Finals Rodeo. To cheer the guys on.”

Every nerve in her being came alive. His arms wrapped around her tighter as if anticipating her response.

“The Grand is comping me two rooms for the entire time.” He loosened his hold as his cheek rubbed her hair. “I was hoping you’d come with me.”

“To watch? From the stands?”

His breath warmed her cheek as he nodded. “The stands, complete with drinks and snacks.”

She couldn’t help squeezing him tighter. “You’re asking me on a date.”

“Yeah, only this time we don’t have to do chores.” He cleared his throat. “The Lord sent you to me, Rachel. You made me stop and think when all I wanted to do was run.”

“We were stuck together for days,” she whispered. “You had no choice.”

“I had a choice. I could have sulked all the way from Casper to Hawk Ridge.”

The paddles of a windmill on the other side of the barn clacked as a gust of wind swept past. Rachel tilted her head toward the sky, a layer of cloud covered any hope of her seeing the sun. She grinned. “You did pretty much sulk the whole time.”

He shifted around until he stood squarely before her and reached down to hold her hands in his. Rachel pressed her palm against his warm skin, her fingers curled around his hand, begging silently to hold him for an eternity. Power emanated through his firm grasp as she read the determination in his clear, blue eyes.

“I know I’m not much of a prize. I’m still stubborn and opinionated, and only God knows what’s to become of me.” He squeezed her hands tighter. “But maybe, we can take those days and build from there. Maybe in time, we can find a way to fit the pieces of our lives together.”

She searched his face and found her future staring back at her. “That’ll work for me.”

His lips brushed hers and Rachel knew she’d finally found the road home.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

“What do you think about Mexico?” Rachel flipped the proposal for Maya Bay Resort over in her hand and searched the back for further information as she tapped her fingers on the pile of information on her desk. She waved the paper toward Zac until she caught his attention. The file beneath the proposal contained photos and references. “This venture is worth exploring.”

Zac Davidson leaned forward in his chair. He tried to see past her hand, but she kept her palm flat on the stack. His killer grin appeared. “I like the way you think, Sis. Summer camps haven’t started yet. Jen and I would be happy to check it out for viability.”

“You and Jen?” Rachel drew the file toward her out of Zac’s reach. “Why should you two go? I’m the one who scouted it out.”

“Because growing season hasn’t started yet either and I have time on my hands — something you don’t.”

Understatement of the year. Her desk overflowed with stock reports featuring cattle investment properties rather than Fortune 500 companies. Over the past six months, she’d shadowed Zac through his routine operations, taking notes and asking questions about his role as financial officer of Davidson Enterprises. They’d brainstormed investments and discussed the merits of current holdings of the company. There was so much to learn, she went to bed with visions of possibilities swimming through her mind.

She’d never worked harder…nor enjoyed anything more.

After returning from the National Rodeo Finals with Nick last December, Rachel knew her life belonged with him. She’d prayed for a way to use her talents to honor the Lord and fulfill a need in the community. When Zac had approached her with an opportunity to manage certain financial aspects of Davidson Enterprises in order to give him more time to operate his own ranch, Rachel knew her prayer had been answered. Growing up on a cattle ranch in Oklahoma had taught her all about cattle and even a thing or two about planting and sowing. Knowledge of investment properties she’d learned all on her own. She’d moved into a cabin reserved for ranch hands just off of the main ranch compound. Melanie had confided she’d lived there when she first came to Hawk Ridge and found the man of her dreams in Gabe. Rachel took that as a good sign.