Saving His Little Miracle (Mills & Boon Medical) (15 page)

‘If it is at all possible then I shall come back later.’ He frowned when she didn’t reply. ‘If that is what you want.’

‘I don’t want to put any pressure on you, Vincenzo,’ she said flatly. She slid out of his arms, turning her back to him as she picked up her dress and slipped it over her head. ‘I understand that your patient has to come first.’

‘Do you?’ He gave a small shrug as he picked up his shoes. ‘Of course you do. You’re a nurse and you must have found yourself in similar situations, I imagine.’

Not really, Lowri thought wryly, although it seemed easier to agree. ‘Naturally. Don’t worry if you can’t make it back tonight. There will be other nights, I expect.’

‘I expect there will.’ His tone was cool. If he was disappointed that their plans had been scuppered, it certainly wasn’t apparent.

Lowri’s heart was heavy as she followed him from the room. She paused on the landing, knowing that she couldn’t bear to go downstairs and see him off. Maybe it was of little consequence to him that they had been interrupted but she found it very hard to accept that tonight hadn’t been special for him and that any other night would be equally as good.

‘I’ll check on Megan,’ she told him, praying that he couldn’t tell how her heart was aching. ‘I hope it goes well, Vincenzo. For your patient, I mean.’

‘Grazie.’

He gave her a quick smile then ran down the stairs. Lowri heard the front door open and a moment later the sound of a car starting up. She made her way to Megan’s room, her hand shaking as she reached for the doorhandle. If the phone hadn’t rung, she and Vincenzo would be making love this very minute. Would they have conceived a child tonight? She had no idea. There were no guarantees after all, nothing to say that it would have happened tonight or any other night. She would have to wait and see, although one thing was certain: when they did make love, it would be because of Megan and not for any other reason. Vincenzo had made that perfectly clear.

* * *

Vincenzo did his best, employing every scrap of the skill he had gained over the years, but it still wasn’t enough. Little Giorgio died on the operating table and all that was left for him to do was to break the news to his parents.

They were heartbroken, their grief so palpable that Vincenzo felt moved almost beyond bearing. It wasn’t the first time he’d had to break bad news to relatives and it wouldn’t be the last time either, he knew. However, the child’s death had affected him far more than he had expected. He couldn’t help thinking about Megan and how he would feel if some doctor came and gave him equally terrible news. The thought brought tears to his eyes and he was hard pressed to contain them.

‘I am so very sorry,’ he repeated. ‘If there was anything more I could have done...’

He broke off, knowing how pointless it was telling them that. It wouldn’t change the outcome and that was all they cared about. He excused himself and left them clinging together for comfort, feeling more downhearted than he had felt in his entire life. He would have given anything to change the outcome but it simply wasn’t possible.

‘Are you OK?’ Jack Wallace had been with him in Theatre and had gone with him to speak to Giorgio’s parents. Vincenzo saw the look Jack gave him and sighed. Obviously, it was a shock for his registrar to discover that he felt anything for his patients.

‘Losing a patient is always difficult,’ he said neutrally.

He punched the button for the lift, willing it to come. The last thing he needed was an in-depth examination of his feelings tonight of all nights. His heart jolted painfully as he recalled the bleakness on Lowri’s face when he had left her. Why hadn’t he made it clear that he regretted what had happened, that he wished with all his heart they hadn’t been interrupted? All it would have taken were a few words of reassurance yet he had found himself unable to say anything. He’d felt too upset, too vulnerable, too damned
everything
to admit how devastated he had been! He slammed his hand against the button again in a fit of impatience and heard Jack sigh.

‘It’s rotten when something like this happens. It always makes me feel as though I should have done something more but it isn’t always possible. The kid was in such a bad way when he was admitted that it’s a wonder he survived so long. I sometimes wonder if it would be kinder all round if we didn’t attempt the impossible.’

Vincenzo knew it was true, knew that every word his registrar said was correct, but it didn’t help. He rounded on the younger man, his eyes blazing. ‘If that’s what you think then I pity your patients,’ he snarled. ‘We’re here to save lives, not to stand aside and let people die.’

‘That wasn’t what I meant,’ Jack protested. ‘I firmly believe that we should do all we can, but sometimes—like in this instance—you know it isn’t going to work. It just seems wrong to raise the parents’ hopes like that.’

‘Maybe. But if it was your child then you would feel very differently, I assure you. You’d want to be sure that everything possible was done for your child.’ His voice caught because he couldn’t help thinking about Megan and what he would want for her, what he would
do
for her, in fact. He would happily give up his own life if it meant she would survive.

The thought was just too profound. Vincenzo knew that he couldn’t deal with it and carry on a conversation. Swinging round, he headed for the stairs, uncaring what the younger man thought. What did it matter what anyone thought about him? It was Megan who mattered; her health was the most important thing of all. He was her father. He had helped to bring her into this world and it was his duty to protect her. No matter what it took, no matter how hard it was for him, he was going to do that!

CHAPTER ELEVEN

L
OWRI
HAD
JUST
finished giving Megan her breakfast when she heard a car coming up the drive. She walked to the end of the terrace but she couldn’t see the vehicle from there. She went back to the table and wiped Megan’s mouth. It was probably a delivery van and Alfredo would deal with it.

‘
Buon giorno
. How are you this morning,
tesoro
?’

She jumped when Vincenzo appeared. She hadn’t expected him to drive all the way back to the villa so early and it was a shock to see him, not a particularly pleasant one either. She dredged up a smile, not wanting him to suspect that she had a problem about his being there. Maybe last night hadn’t meant as much to him as it had done to her, but she had to get over it if she wanted to help Megan.

‘I wasn’t expecting you back so soon,’ she said coolly, helping Megan down from her chair.

‘No?’ His dark brows rose mockingly. ‘I did say I would be back.’

Megan ran over to him, grabbing hold of his hand to lead him into the garden, so they didn’t get a chance to say anything else, not that Lowri was disappointed. Maybe she was mistaken but there’d been a definite hint of something...
dangerous
in his voice just now.

She shrugged off the thought, knowing how foolish it was. Loading the dishes onto a tray, she took them into the kitchen. Maria had arrived early and was busy making bread dough so she stacked them in the dishwasher, shaking her head when the housekeeper protested. While she appreciated everything that Maria did for them, she didn’t want to get too used to being looked after. Once she returned home, she would have to do everything herself, cook and clean as well as take care of Megan and the new baby. Assuming there was going to be a baby.

Panic overwhelmed her. If she didn’t have this child and something happened to Megan then she would never forgive herself. She had to go ahead, had to give Megan the chance of living a long and happy life. And if that meant sleeping with Vincenzo that’s what she would do, even if she knew that it meant nothing to him. She had to set aside her scruples for the sake of her daughter. Surely that was enough to keep her strong, enough to stop her wishing for more. Maybe Vincenzo didn’t love her, maybe he didn’t care very much either, but if he helped to save Megan then she would be eternally grateful to him.

* * *

Vincenzo spent the morning allowing himself to be led around. Megan showed him all her favourite places, insisting that he crawl under this bush or look under that rock in the hope that they would find some kind of small treasure. It was a whole new experience for him to be involved in her games and he discovered to his surprise how much he was enjoying himself. It made him see that he was very different from his own father.

It was a revelation to realise it. Vincenzo knew that he needed to think about it but it was hard to do that when Megan kept demanding he play with her. When Lowri announced that it was time for the child to take a nap, he went to his study and sat down at his desk so he could think it all through.

He had always believed that he was exactly like his father in many respects. Umberto Lombardi had been a cold and distant man who had cared little for others, even his own son. He had been more interested in making money so as soon as he could he had sent Vincenzo away to school. They’d had very little contact after that and although Vincenzo hadn’t missed him, his father’s indifference had had a huge influence on him.

He had grown up expecting very little from other people. Although he had a few friends, there was nobody close to him. He preferred it that way. He was self-contained, focused, single-minded when it came to his career. He had known what he’d wanted to achieve and had gone after it with ruthless determination. Up till now. Now everything had changed. He could no longer put his own interests first. Not now there was Megan to consider. And Lowri.

He got up from the desk and went to the window. Having Lowri reappear in his life had turned it upside down. Whereas before he had been content with the way he lived, he wasn’t content any longer. He wanted more than this sterile existence! He wanted to grab life by the throat and live it to the full. And if that meant falling in love, getting married, having a family, well, he wanted them too.

His head spun because the idea was so mind-blowing. He wanted to fall in love, wanted to be a husband and a father, but could he do it? Was he capable of being both or either of those things?

He wished he knew, wished there were guarantees, certainties, but there weren’t. All he knew was that if he didn’t take this chance, he might never get another one. He most certainly wouldn’t get the chance to spend his life with Lowri, that was sure. And that was what he wanted more than anything.

* * *

It was the strangest of days. On the surface it appeared as though everything was flowing smoothly but Lowri was too aware of the undercurrents to let that fool her. Vincenzo didn’t put a foot wrong all day. He played with Megan, showing endless patience as the little girl involved him in all her games. He was the epitome of the perfect host when they all had lunch together, too, asking questions about Lowri’s life and seemingly fascinated by her answers. When Megan had her nap, he suggested they should make use of the time to swim in the pool.

Although Lowri agreed, it was more for politeness’ sake than anything else. Quite frankly, she found it unnerving to be subjected to such a blatant charm offensive. What did he want? What was he planning? She wished she knew.

By the time evening fell her nerves were stretched to breaking point. Megan had worn herself out so once she had eaten her supper, Lowri put her to bed. She lingered upstairs as long as she could but in the end knew that she couldn’t put off the moment any longer. Maria was waiting to serve dinner before she left and it wasn’t fair to delay her.

Vincenzo was in the
salone
when she went downstairs. He looked round and smiled when she appeared but once again Lowri could feel the tension in the air and her heart gave a nervous little hiccup. He was up to something—she’d put good money on it too! But what exactly? That was the question.

‘I thought we’d have a drink in here before dinner. There’s a storm brewing so we won’t be able to eat outside tonight.’

‘Really?’ Lowri went to the window and stared out. She gave a little shrug. ‘It looks quite calm to me.’

‘You get to know the signs when you live here for any length of time,’ he said smoothly. He poured some wine into a crystal glass and brought it over to her. He handed her the glass then pointed to the mountains. ‘You can see the clouds gathering over there. It looks as though we’re in for some really rough weather.’

Lowri barely glanced at the lowering sky. She was far too conscious of his nearness to worry about climatic changes. She took a gulp of her wine and coughed when it shot down the wrong way.

‘Careful!’ Taking the glass off her, he patted her on the back but it didn’t help. If anything, it made it worse. Now she not only had to contend with the spasm in her throat but his touch as well.

She shook her head, gasping for air. ‘Don’t!’

‘
Mi scusi
.’ He stepped back, his face immediately closing up. By the time that she had finally managed to drag some air into her aching lungs, he had moved away and was pouring himself a glass of wine. She sighed, very aware that she had overreacted.

‘Sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you.’

‘It doesn’t matter.’ He gave a small shrug as he sat down. To all intents and purposes, it appeared that he was telling the truth and that it didn’t matter but she had seen the hurt in his eyes and felt guiltier than ever. There had been no need to react like that when he had been trying to help her.

‘No, but I’m still sorry.’ She bit her lip then rushed on, knowing that she had to say what was on her mind. ‘I may be wrong but has something happened, Vincenzo?’

‘I’m not sure I understand what you mean,’ he countered, swirling the wine around his glass.

‘It’s just that you seem...well, different. I’ve noticed a certain undercurrent today and I’m not sure what the reason is for it. So has something happened?’

‘Not that I’m aware of,’ he began, but she held up her hand.

‘Please! I know something’s going on so there’s no point lying. It would be easier if you told me the truth.’