Science Fair (15 page)

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Authors: Dave Barry,Ridley Pearson

BOOK: Science Fair
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“Oh,
that’ll
help,” said Tamara. “Being backed up by a lying cheater.”

“Come on,” said Toby. “We gotta do this. If we don’t go to The Hornet, these morons could end up blowing up the school. Is that what you want?” Tamara looked down, then shook her head. Micah just stared at Toby.

“Wel
is
it?” said Toby.

“I’m thinking,” said Micah.

I
T WAS DARK BY THE TIME TOBY
returned to Milkwort Court. He paused out on the street for a moment, watching his house. Through the living room window he saw the TV on, which meant his parents were stil up. He hoped they hadn’t discovered that he’d snuck out. But it was equal y important they not hear him sneak back in.

So he tiptoed across the yard cautiously and around the side of the house to his bedroom window. He peered inside: thankful y the room was dark and the door closed.
Good.
He reached for the window to raise it.

“Hel o, Toby,” spoke an electronical y distorted voice from directly behind him.

Oh, no!

Toby spun around: stepping out from the shadows were Vaderian and the Wookiee. Vaderian was dressed in ful Darth Vader costume, including helmet. He was holding a glowing light saber—apparently he’d replaced the batteries—which he now pointed at Toby’s chest.

“So, young Harbinger,” he said, “we meet again.” He emitted an electronic chuckle, as though he had said something witty.

“What are
you
doing here?” said Toby.

“As I told you last time,” said Vaderian, “I want more from your father’s col ection.”

“I can’t get you anything now,” said Toby, glancing nervously at the house. He whispered: “My parents are home!”

“Fine,” said Vaderian. He produced a cel phone from inside his cloak. “Then I’l cal them and tel them you stole the Han Solo blaster.”

“No!” said Toby. “Don’t cal them!”

“Then get me something else.”

“But…”

“Now.”
Vaderian held up the phone. “I’l count to ten. One, two…”

Toby’s mind raced.

“…three, four…”

He rubbed his face, trying to think of a way he could get out of his room and past his parents, down to the basement.…

“…seven, eight…”

Then Toby remembered:
his room.

“…nine…”

“Stop!” said Toby. “I have something for you.”

“What?” said Vaderian.

“A Luke Skywalker blow-up dol .”

Vaderian almost dropped his light saber. “You
have
one?” he said. “An
original
?” Toby nodded glumly, racked by guilt.

“That’s more like it,” said Vaderian eagerly, putting away the phone. “Where is it?”

“I’l get it,” said Toby. “But you have to stay out here.”

“Al right,” said Vaderian. “But don’t try anything stupid. If you don’t come right back here with the Luke dol , I’m cal ing your parents, understand? I might even ring the doorbel and introduce myself.”

“No, no, I’l bring you the dol ,” Toby said. “Just don’t make any noise, okay?”

He turned, slowly raised his bedroom window, and climbed onto the sil . In the darkness, he felt around with his foot, locating the Lego castle he’d built when he was nine. He didn’t want to step on it, so he reached his foot out farther, shifting his weight into the room.

Too far.
Toby’s foot missed the edge of the bed. He tumbled into the room and landed on the floor with a loud
thump
, fol owed by a louder
BAM
as the window, which he’d let go of as he fel , slammed shut. A moment later he heard voices from the living room and the sound of footsteps coming his way. He quickly rol ed under his bed.

The bedroom door opened, flooding the room with a soft light from the hal way. Through the smal gap between his dangling bedspread and the floor, he saw his mom’s silhouette in the doorway.

“Toby?” she said. “Are you al right?”

Toby was about to answer when his voice, coming from the speaker under his pil ow, said, “I’m fine. I’m trying to sleep.”

“We heard a noise,” said his mother. “It sounded like it came from your room.”

The computer, not recognizing these words, hesitated, then said, “I just want to sleep, okay?”

“Yes, but it was quite a loud noise,” said his mother.

“I-fel -out-of-bed-but-I’m-okay!” said Toby, talking fast, to beat the computer.

“I’m fine. I’m trying to sleep,” said the computer.

His mother hesitated.

“Are you sure?” she said. “You sound…strange.”

“I’m-fine-real y-Mom-thanks!” Toby said quickly.

“I’m fine. I’m trying to sleep,” said the computer.

His mother hesitated again. Under the bed, Toby held his breath.

“Al right, then,” said his mother. “Good night.”

“Good night!” Toby said quickly.

“Good night,” said the computer.

His mother closed the door. Toby waited a few moments, listening to her footsteps recede. He crawled out from under the bed and turned off his computer, then pul ed the Luke Skywalker dol out from under the covers. Careful y, he raised the window again. Vaderian and the Wookiee emerged from the shadows. Toby pushed the dol through the window.

Vaderian took it eagerly, and, after inspecting it for a moment, he giggled softly and handed the dol to the Wookiee. Toby started to lower the window, but Vaderian’s black glove stopped it.

“What now?” Toby whispered angrily. “I gave you your stupid dol .”

“I’m going to need more,” said Vaderian.

“I can’t,” whispered Toby. “You’ve got enough. You’re not even
paying
for that! Just…leave me alone. Please.”

“I see,” said Vaderian. “So you prefer that I tel your father who’s been raiding his col ection?” Toby hung his head. “No,” he whispered.

“Good,” said Vaderian. “I’l be in touch.” He made a point of breathing heavily through the electronic device, like Darth Vader, before lowering the window. And then he was gone.

With a groan, Toby flopped onto his back. Somehow, he had to get rid of this maniac
and
convince The Hornet he was tel ing the truth about the kids’ science-fair cheating…not to mention the involvement of classified technology. Toby stared up at the darkness, begging his overworked, overworried brain to produce an answer, or at least an idea.…

In the living room, Mr. and Mrs. Harbinger were discussing their son’s odd behavior.

“It was the strangest thing,” Fawn was saying. “He said everything twice, and he spoke…oddly.”

“How so?” said Roger.

“Like he was distracted,” said Fawn. “Worried about something.”

“It’s this suspension,” said Roger. “You know how kids are at that age. They think everything’s a huge crisis.”

“True,” said Fawn, smiling at the cluelessness of the young. “He’l feel better after some sleep.” She yawned. “I could use some sleep myself. I’m going to bed.”

“Me, too,” said Roger. He rose and went to the window and started to close the blinds, then suddenly stopped, pressing his face to the window.

“What is it?” said Fawn, coming over.

“Just for a second there, I thought I saw something,” said Roger.

“Saw what?” said Fawn.

“It’s nothing,” said Roger, peering out. “It’s just shadows. But for just a second, out there past the streetlight, I thought I saw…this is
so
ridiculous…”

“Saw what?” Fawn repeated.

Roger looked sheepish. “Darth Vader,” he said.

Fawn laughed out loud.

“You
do
need sleep,” she said.

T
HE PHONE JANGLED
. Vrsk jerked awake. In the other bed, Drmtsi groaned.

The TV was stil on, tuned to the shopping channel. Vrsk and Drmtsi had final y fal en asleep around four a.m., but not before using their new credit cards to purchase a variety of items to go with their two cappuccino machines, including jewelry, clothing, shoes (men’s and ladies’), exercise equipment, a set of ovenware, an Air Hockey table, and an eight-foot inflatable goril a pool toy.

The phone jangled again. Vrsk fumbled for the handset.

“Hel o?” he said, in English.

“It is Prmkt,” said Prmkt, in Krpsht.

Vrsk, switching to Krpsht, turned to Drmtsi and said, “It is Prmkt.”

Drmtsi groaned again.

“Men are watching you,” said Prmkt.

“What men?” said Vrsk.

“I don’t know yet,” said Prmkt.

Vrsk turned to Drmtsi and said, “Men are watching us.”

Drmtsi opened one bloodshot eye.

“What men?” he said.

“He doesn’t know yet,” said Vrsk.

Drmtsi rubbed his face. His head hurt.

“I wil find out who these men are,” said Prmkt. “I wil cal later.”

Before Vrsk could relay this, Drmtsi said, “Tel him to find out who these men are and cal later.” Vrsk, speaking into the phone, said, “Drmtsi says find out who these men are and cal later.”

“I just said that,” said Prmkt.

“Exactly,” said Vrsk.

The line went dead. Vrsk hung up the phone. On the TV screen, a perky woman was sel ing a kitchen appliance that could toast bagels
and
play DVDs. The price had just dropped twenty dol ars, to $179.99. Despite their exhaustion, both Vrsk and Drmtsi sat up to watch. This could be big.

T
OBY GOT A BREAK
the next morning: both his parents left home to attend an al-day seminar on curing baldness with zucchini oil. That meant Toby didn’t have to think up a new way to sneak out of the house.

The trick was getting into school. He’d agreed to meet Tamara and Micah at The Hornet’s office at 8:20, just before the homeroom bel . But Toby was stil suspended. He was afraid one of the teachers might spot him and kick him out before he could get to The Hornet and help his friends convince her—they
had
to convince her—about the science-fair cheating plot. As he left his room, he grabbed one of his basebal caps and pul ed the brim low to cover his face, hoping this would be enough of a disguise.

On the way to Hubble Middle he kept a wary eye out for the maniac Vaderian and his hairy sidekick; to his relief, he saw neither. He entered the school at 8:19, the hal ways quickly emptying as students headed for their homerooms. Keeping his head down, Toby hurried toward the main office. Nobody stopped him. He reached the office just as the bel rang.

Ducking inside, he was relieved to see Tamara and Micah in the outer room, sitting on the bench, not looking thril ed to be there.

“Does The Hornet know we’re here?” Toby asked.

“Mrs. Breetle just went in to tel her,” said Tamara.

“We stil have time to escape,” said Micah.

“Micah, we have to do this,” said Toby.

“Remind me exactly why we have to do this,” said Micah.

“Because of what Sternabite said,” Toby explained, “about the projects being dangerous.”

“But that’s just his opinion,” said Micah.

“But he’s real y smart about science,” said Toby.

“Right,” said Micah. “He’s also a lunatic with a robot attack owl.”

Toby was trying to think of a good comeback for that when The Hornet’s office door opened and Mrs. Breetle came out, holding an armful of papers.

“Principal Plotz-Gornett wil see you now,” she said. “But she only has a minute.” Mrs. Breetle bustled off toward the copy machine.

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