Seasons of Sorrow (13 page)

October, 2004

T
he little apartment bustled with activity. Today was Charlotte’s wedding day. Though Charlotte and Brandy had graduated in May, they were still living together in their apartment to save money and Brandy was about to start law school. She intended to keep the small apartment for herself even after Charlotte moved out.

After a great deal of cajoling on Derek’s part, Charlotte finally agreed to a large ceremony at one of the biggest churches in Dallas. She hated the idea of two hundred people she didn’t know sitting in pews to watch her walk down the aisle. The idea of all those eyes on her gave her the willies. The guest list actually held two hundred and fifty guests, but Charlotte did know about fifty of them as they were her friends and family. The other two hundred guests were Leah Fallon’s friends, relatives, and business associates.

Leah was determined that her son’s wedding would be the wedding of the decade. Everything she did was extravagant. This ceremony would be no different. Huge flower arrangements, special lighting, and even topiaries were brought into the church where Charlotte and Derek would be married.

At the Fallon home, where the reception was staged, tents were to be set up with standing heaters set up to keep everyone warm on the crisp October night. Charlotte had given up trying to do anything or choose anything for herself when it came to her wedding. Leah Fallon was a bulldozer in a stylish suit.

Charlotte hated her wedding dress. It was long, fitted, and strapless. It was also beautiful. But it just wasn’t
her
. Just like the dress she wore to her engagement party, the cut and color were fabulous and extremely flattering to her figure, but they were too sophisticated and revealing. Charlotte always dreamed of a ‘princess’ wedding dress, with a big tulle skirt and a fitted bodice covered in seed pearls and lace.

Leah immediately dismissed such a dress as too immature and tacky for the ‘society wedding of the century’. Charlotte tried to argue and actually managed to put her foot down, but Derek talked her out of it. He said such a dress wasn’t flattering to her figure or her style and, though Charlotte knew better, she gave in. She wanted Derek to be happy on their wedding day.

It never occurred to her that he should also want her to be happy on their wedding day too.

Now the day had arrived and she was zipped into the heavy white satin dress that hugged her curvy figure and made her fair skin glow. Her dark brown hair was curled and pulled on top of her head. Her veil would be attached later. A tiara, borrowed from one of the finest jewelers in Dallas, would be pinned on top of her head, nestled in front of the curls.

There was one suggestion Leah made that Charlotte had no argument with and that was hiring a make-up artist to do her face before the wedding. Charlotte was useless when it came to make-up. She could manage a simple, put-together look, but that was all. Anything more dramatic was beyond her meager abilities. Any time she needed more than basic make-up, Brandy had done it for her.

The make-up artist was doing the entire wedding party, which Charlotte arranged as a sort of present for her bridesmaids, not that she was close with half of them. Leah insisted several of Derek’s cousins be bridesmaids because Charlotte only had a Brandy, Greg, and a couple of other girlfriends that she felt were close enough to be in her wedding party. Derek, however, had a million friends and had quite a few groomsmen.

Now it was a few minutes before they were supposed to get in the limo and take the ride to the church. Charlotte asked the bridal party to give her a few minutes alone with Brandy, who was her maid of honor. They were in her bedroom, sipping champagne, so Charlotte could relax. The entire day had already consisted of chaos and a crowded apartment and it would only be more chaotic and crowded once they got to the church for the wedding.

There was a knock on the bedroom door.

“Come in,” Brandy called out.

Charlotte was standing by the window, looking out onto the small park that ran parallel to their apartment complex. She turned to see Greg stick his head in. She smiled at him.

“Hey,” she said. “What are you doing here?”

Brandy poured him a glass of champagne without being asked and handed it to him as he came in the room. Greg set the glass down on the dresser.

“Brandy, can I have a moment alone with Charlotte?” he asked.

Her friend smiled slightly and nodded. After she slipped out of the room, Greg faced Charlotte again. He looked at her with appreciative eyes.

“You look gorgeous. Absolutely beautiful.”

“Thank you,” she said.

Greg looked troubled. He rubbed his palms together nervously. Charlotte walked to him.

“What’s wrong, Greg?”

He reached out and took her hands in his. “Are you sure this is what you want, Charlotte?”

She looked at him, bewildered. Where had that question come from? It was completely out of the blue. “What?”

“Does he make you happy? For the rest of your life, will you be happy with him?”

His questions took her aback.

“Yes, Greg. He makes me happy. I see myself growing old with him.”

Greg dropped his head, nodding, but stared at his feet. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Charlotte was confused. She didn’t understand what was happening. Finally, he lifted his head and cupped her cheeks with his hands, looking deep into her eyes.

“Are you certain?” he asked. “You can be honest with me.”

“Why are you asking me this?” He was making her so uncomfortable.

“Your parents aren’t here to ask you this and I just want to be sure that you’ve thought it through,” he answered.

That was sweet. Charlotte squeezed his hands as he still had hers in his grip. “I’m sure.” She didn’t share that a small voice asked her every day if she was sure she was doing the right thing. What else could she do? She loved Derek. She truly did. It was just hard to be his fiancée sometimes, but that was true of any relationship. Still, a huge part of her longed to have a family again, to have someone who would hold her at night. She had chalked up her underlying doubts to pre-wedding jitters.

“I hope he makes all your dreams come true, Charlotte. You deserve to have everything you want.”

Greg leaned over and gently placed his lips on her forehead. For some reason she didn’t understand, tears filled Charlotte’s eyes and she blinked furiously in an effort to hold them back. She didn’t say a word as he stepped back and left her alone in the bedroom. Without knowing why, Charlotte felt as though she had lost something special.

She noticed Greg’s untouched glass of champagne on the dresser. She picked it up and drained it before she left the bedroom for the last time as Charlotte Dillon.

Summer

A single sunbeam is enough to drive away many shadows.

~St. Francis of Assisi~

Chapter Thirteen

July, Present Day

T
he ringing of the phone brought Charlotte out of a dead sleep. She jerked upright in bed and fumbled for the hand set on the nightstand.

“Hello?” she mumbled, still half asleep.

“Charlotte.”

She went rigid at the sound of Derek’s voice. Reaching out, she snapped on the lamp next to the bed so she could see the caller ID. The number was blocked.

Charlotte hadn’t heard from Derek since before he left the country. The police had finally backed off just last week, but she imagined they would be back in full force now that her husband was calling her.

“Where are you?” she snapped.

“Somewhere safe.” He sounded satisfied, which only served to piss her off.

“What do you want?”

“Have you been talking to the police?” Derek asked.

“Yes. Yes, I have, Derek. FBI agents came
to the house
to interview me. Did you think that you could steal ten million dollars, ditch our settlement meeting, and skip town with your girlfriend and it wouldn’t cause trouble?” she responded incredulously.

“Calm down.” He sound as unruffled as ever. “You weren’t involved. They’ll see that and leave you alone after a while.”

Charlotte felt the anger rising within her like a tide, threatening to choke her. “I’m sure that’s easy for you to say since you’re out of their reach with your girlfriend. How is Danielle, by the way?”

“Don’t do this, Charlotte. It’s not the time.”

Charlotte scoffed. “Then when would be a good time? When you come back to Dallas for a visit?” She paused before she continued. “How long, Derek? How long had you been screwing other women while we were married?”

He paused. “Charlotte, you don’t want to do this.”

“Yes, I do,” she said.

Derek sighed. “Fine.”

“How long?” she repeated.

“Since our first anniversary.”

She accepted the blow, because that wasn’t even the most important question she had. It hurt, but that pain seemed small compared to everything she had endured. Since he left her in January and then left town later, a question had been burning inside of her, threatening to consume her.

“Okay.” Charlotte took a deep breath. She wasn’t even sure if she wanted the answer to the next questions, but she was going to ask them anyway. “Do you miss our son? Did you ever even love him?”

There was silence on the other end for so long that she thought he might have hung up.

“Derek?”

“I loved him in my own way, Charlotte.”

She didn’t speak for a moment. “Is that why you called me at one in morning on the day that is exactly six months since he died?”

“I knew this day would be hard for you,” he said. “I thought you might want to talk.”

“Oh, so after months of me calling you, you decide you want to talk after you leave the country?” Charlotte rolled her eyes. “Well, you weren’t around much the day of his funeral, a day I needed you a lot more, so why should I miss your presence now six months after he died?”

“I didn’t call to fight, Charlotte.”

“Then why the hell did you call, Derek? Did you call to see how I was doing since you left me alone to deal with the mess you made? Did you call to see if I had finally killed myself because of how badly each day hurts since our little boy died? Why the fuck did you call?” By the end of her rant, Charlotte was screaming. How could he be so cold when he left her with the ruins that used to be their life?

“Is Greg there?” he asked.

That odd question snapped Charlotte out of her tantrum. “What? Why would Greg be here?”

Derek laughed humorlessly. “Because he’s been dying to get into your pants since before I met you.”

“Are you high?” Charlotte barked. “Greg has been one of my best friends for over a decade and he’s been here every time I needed him, which is more than I can say for you. And why are you changing the subject?”

“He never did have the courage to make his move. I listened to him talk about you almost non-stop for months in college before I finally wrangled an invitation to go out with the three of you.”

“You’re unbelievable,” she argued. “Greg and Brandy dated for several months before they broke up.”

Derek scoffed. “No, Greg and Brandy went on one date and realized that they would be nothing more than friends. Then Greg saw you. That was it. He was head over heels. But you were so shy that you never gave him an in. Brandy felt sorry for him and kept trying to get you two together but Greg couldn’t get your attention.”