Sex and Violence in Hollywood (18 page)

“We’ve done it now, Rain,” Adam said. “We’ve sent Carter over the edge.”

“No, I’m not kidding,” Carter insisted. “It was...I’ve never felt that way before.”

Adam asked, “You mean, in danger? Like maybe you’re gonna get your brains blown out, that kind of feeling?”

“Yeah, that’s it!” Carter pointed a finger at him. “Danger. I guess I’ve never experienced danger before. Real danger. It felt good! I really think it was a life-changing experience.”

“Bullshit,” Adam said. “An underwear-changing experience, maybe.”

“No, really, Adam, I’m twice as alive now! I want to do it again.”

“You’re in shock, Carter. You can’t do it again.”

Rain sat motionless and watched Carter, smiled knowingly as she listened.

“I’ve always kinda felt like something was missing from my life,” Carter went on. “And that’s it. Danger. Excitement. I don’t have enough danger and excitement in my life.”

“You don’t have enough life in your life,” Adam said. “You wouldn’t leave the house if I didn’t go over there and drag your ass downstairs.”

“Hey,” Rain said to Adam. “Would you shut the fuck up and let the man talk.”

Adam rolled his eyes.

“I guess what I’m saying is...” Carter moved closer and whispered, “If you guys really want to kill your parents, I wanna help.” He paused a moment, frowned. Then smiled. “Yeah, that’s what I wanted to say. That I want to help.” He leaned back, somehow more relaxed, and finished off his half of the grilled cheese.

Rain laughed and gave Carter’s arm an affectionate slap. “You’re good fuckin’ people, Carter.”

“Thank you,” Carter said with a nod and a grin. “I think you’re pretty cool yourself.”

Adam said, “I’m going to vomit.”

They left Denny’s when four obstreperous young men took the booth across from theirs, mistreated the waitress, then made lewd remarks about various parts of Rain’s body. She leaned over and whispered to Adam that she wanted to leave.

“Really?” he said. “I’m surprised. I figured four guys like that would be a typical date for you.”

She gave him a foul look. “You know, I’m beginning to think your dad isn’t the only asshole in the family.”

Adam’s mouth dropped open, snapped shut again. He could not believe she’d said that. Did she know how deeply it stabbed him? Probably. She knew more than she was telling about a lot of things, he suspected.

Carter and Rain made out noisily in the backseat. Adam felt no jealousy—after all, Rain was the Antichrist—and yet it made him uncomfortable. Didn’t feel right. Nothing felt right. Everything in his life at the moment was wrong. Except Alyssa. It was late, but he still planned to go see her after he dropped off Rain and Carter.

At his house, Adam stopped in the driveway and waited with the engine running while Rain got out. She said goodbye to Carter, but not to Adam. Carter got in the front seat and they headed for his place.

“Looks like you and Rain get along pretty well,” Adam said, smiling in spite of his discomfort with the whole thing.

“I’m not sure,” Carter said. “I feel a little spooky about this, Adam. I mean, it’s surreal. I’m not complaining, I just want to make sure I’m not doing anything that’s gonna...y’know, that’s gonna hurt you. Is this gonna be a problem?”

Carter’s words made Adam’s shoulders feel a bit lighter. “Thank you, Carter. You have no idea how much I appreciate that. But I don’t want you to get hurt, either.”

“Me?”

“I’ve warned you about her, but I don’t think you’ve listened. She’s sixteen. You left sixteen behind the same time I did, years ago. That means you are now a criminal. In the eyes of many, a pervert.”

“I know, I know, she’s underage, she’s trouble, I kept telling myself that the whole time, but...Adam, she’s spectacular.”

“Yeah, I know. I think I lost a section of my right lung the first time she kissed me. And a blow job from Rain is like having your brain massaged.”

“My brain is still tingling.”

“But it’s scary, and it’s not free. She’ll want something for all the fun, and she’ll get it. Turn on the news, see if there’s anything about the robbery.”

Carter turned on the radio, found a news station. “You still think she’s evil?”

Adam laughed. “Still? Evil doesn’t just go away, Carter. Evil is like Strom Thurman, it just hangs around and farts and slobbers and decays and makes everybody sick. And Rain is evil.”

The female newscaster on the radio read a story about a twelve year old boy in Canoga Park who had raped and killed the five year old girl who lived next door. She went on to cover a story about a single father in Canyon Country who had locked his nine year old son in a small, unventilated, metal toolshed as punishment for bad behavior, and had forgotten about him, leaving him there from the late hours of the morning until dinnertime. By the time the father opened the shed, the intense heat and lack of oxygen had killed the boy. There was no mention of the liquor store robbery.

Carter turned to Adam, his expression serious. “You’re really in trouble, aren’t you?”

“You and me both now.”

“I’m not joking.”

“I’ve never joked about it! You’re the one who’s been acting like it’s a joke!”

“Are you gonna do it?”

“Do what?”

“You know.”

“Oh. That. I’m confused, Carter. You seem awfully comfortable with the idea of killing my dad and Gwen.”

Carter shrugged. “I’m not saying it’s right, or anything, but...I don’t think anybody’s really gonna miss your dad, are they? Besides a few studio bean counters, right? He’s an amoral prick whose feet smell like the chimneys of Auschwitz. Your words, by the way, not mine.”

“But what about Gwen?”

Another pause. “I don’t really know her. I mean, it would be, like, a definite waste of grade-A womanflesh, but still, I don’t know her. And besides, like you said...she’s got reloads. I take that very personally.”

In some small back room of his mind, Adam could not believe he was having this conversation. But it did not intrude on his other thoughts, or his attention to what Carter was saying. The idea felt good. He did not trust Rain as far as he could kick her, but he had trusted Carter his whole life. If he was going to do something dangerous, he wanted Carter with him.

“Why do you want to do this?” Adam asked.

“To keep you from getting caught, dipshit,” Carter replied impatiently, as if it were obvious. “And because your alternative sucks. You know what would happen to you in prison? You’d get more dates the first day than you’ve had all your life.”

“I’ve done my best to come to the conclusion that prison wouldn’t be so bad. Or that my dad would hire Johnny Cochran to get me off.” Adam gulped. Suddenly his mouth was dry, throat felt swollen. “Anything to avoid doing what Rain wants to do.”

“And what you want to do! How many times have you talked about killing your dad? Remember our freshman year in high school? You talked about it so much I thought you were really gonna to do it. You wanted to throw him in front of a moving train and watch him come apart, remember? But we couldn’t figure out how to get him to the tracks.”

“But what if we get caught?” Adam said, thumping a fist on the steering wheel. “I go to prison for statutory rape, and no matter how bad it is, at least I’ll come home at the end of it. With murder, we’re talking the death penalty, or life in prison. Not for Rain, of course, she’s a minor, but definitely for us. And Rain knows that, which is why she wants me to help, because that distances her from it. ‘My big brother did it!’ she’ll say, and she won’t be lying.”

“That’s why you need me. To help you, and to keep an eye on her.”

Adam nodded. “Makes sense. So...you really want to do this?”

Carter grinned. “Can’t wait!”

SIXTEEN

After dropping Carter off,
Adam could not get to Alyssa’s house fast enough. It was almost one in the morning, so he called ahead and asked her if it was okay to come so late. She and her parents were already in bed, but she would meet him at the door.

When he arrived, Alyssa waited for him in the doorway in a white Bugs Bunny T-shirt several sizes too large for her, legs and feet bare. She leaned on the doorjamb, smiling but sleepy.

Adam threw his arms around her and locked his lips over hers. He was beginning to like walking up to a beautiful girl and kissing her like that without a word or a signal.

Inside, Alyssa’s house was dark and smelled of incense and marijuana. An overhead light lit the small foyer, but beyond that, only darkness. Hunkering in a shadowy corner of the foyer was a four-foot tall ceramic Buddha that made Adam back up a step at first glance. For a moment, he thought it was a fat naked black dwarf.

Adam asked, “Are your parents Buddhists?”

“No. They worship at the First Church of Bad Taste.”

It was an old house with arched plaster ceilings and doorways. Alyssa led him into the dark living room and turned on a lamp. Brass lamps, wicker furniture. Two tall plants in brass pots flanked a rectangular window that looked out on the front yard. Nearly one whole wall was covered with bookshelves, knick-knacks on each shelf in front of the books. A brass peace sign, a red weatherbird, a little Nixon doll hanging from a gallows, some ugly Troll dolls. A glass-topped buried wood coffee table with a shiny finish stood in front of the wicker sofa, a large brass ashtray in the center. Three barely-touched joints rested on the edge, books of matches scattered around it. Against a wall, the focal point of the entire room, a big-screen TV.

“Are you hungry?” Alyssa asked. “I can fix you something.”

“Hungry for you,” he said, with an embarrassed chuckle. It was not the kind of thing he normally said out loud. But with Alyssa, it felt right. He kissed her again, until she laughed. “What’s so funny?” he asked.

“Did you have a horny night, or something?”

“No. I missed you, that’s all.”

She frowned, took both Adam’s hands in hers. “You’re shaking. Are you all right?”

Adam wanted to tell her everything, knew it would be such a relief, but feared it would soil their relationship, send her running in the opposite direction. He said, “It’s been a rough night.”

“Family stuff?”

He moved his head in a way that might be interpreted as a nod.

“I have an orange juice craving.” she said urgently and beckoned him to the kitchen. Rather than turning on the overhead light, Alyssa went to a counter to the right of the entrance. Reached beneath a bank of wooden cupboards, switched on a long rectangular fluorescent over the counter. Then another over the sink. Even in bad light, it was a homey kitchen. Spacious, with a hardwood floor, pale stucco walls. An island in the center housed an electric range, and beyond it, more wooden cupboards and counter space, a dishwasher, and a refrigerator. Both counters and the island were tiled in glossy watercolor-yellow and -blue. Plants hung in the windows and the kitchen smelled of a mixture of rich coffees and teas. One back corner was taken up by a wooden brick-red picnic table with two long matching benches. Newspapers and crossword puzzlebooks were stacked on the table, a bag of laundry rested on a bench. In the other corner, a small desk with computer, monitor, and printer.

“Nice kitchen,” Adam said.

She smiled as she opened the refrigerator. “Yeah, you’d think it belonged to normal people, huh?” She opened a carton of orange juice and took a few gulps. Turned to him suddenly and tossed an arm around his neck, pulled him to her. She dribbled some orange juice into his mouth. Adam laughed and inadvertently spit some of it back.

“Sorry,” he said, still laughing as he wiped his mouth.

Alyssa’s mouth hung open in feigned offense as she bent over laughing, trying to be quiet. “You don’t like pulp?”

Shaking his head, he put his arms around her again. She put the carton back in the refrigerator and closed the door with her foot.

“I love pulp,” Adam said. “You just surprised me.” They kissed for a while, then Adam whispered, “Let’s go back in the living room. I hated 9
¹
/
₂
Weeks.”

They went to the sofa, lay face to face on its soft cushions and throws. Spoke in whispers, gently stroked each other’s faces, hair. Traded feather-soft kisses.

Adam vaguely observed that the kiss involved no physical trauma of any kind. No internal organs were jostled or damaged, and his spine went uninjured.

Alyssa seemed tense, as if anticipating something.

“Something wrong?” Adam asked.

“A little nervous, I guess. I know it’s stupid, but I keep thinking my parents are going to walk in here and catch us.”

“There’s nothing stupid about that. Nobody wants to get in trouble with their parents.”

“That’s not it, see, I wouldn’t get in trouble. If they come in here and find us naked and humping, they’ll probably tell us to enjoy ourselves. Or worse, sit down to chat.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Oh, no. They want me to do my own thing.”

“Fine, but do they have to watch?”