Sexy SEAL Box Set: A SEAL's Seduction\A SEAL's Surrender\A SEAL's Salvation\A SEAL's Kiss (88 page)

That’s what made him so awesome.

She blinked fast, knowing tears weren’t going to help either of them.

“I know, that’s too new-agey for you.” She wrinkled her nose and shrugged. “But I’m just not ready to talk about it.”

Hopefully she wouldn’t have to be. He seemed better. He was responding well to treatment. Maybe he’d get through this and they’d never have to talk about it at all.

After a long consideration, her father nodded. He looked a little relieved, too, she noted. So, there. She’d just made them both feel a little better.

The tight ball of dread didn’t shift from her belly. It’d been there for two weeks now and she was getting used to it. At least, she was telling herself that. And like not talking about the bad stuff, she figured if she told herself that often enough, she’d eventually believe it.

“Then let’s talk about happier subjects, shall we?” her father suggested, folding both hands over his belly in lecture mode.

Sage automatically straightened, shoulders back and chin up, ready to listen.

“Let’s discuss your future. I’m quite pleased thinking about it,” he told her, his smile backing up his claim.

“My future?”

As in, her and Aiden. Together forever in wedded bliss. Was that the future he meant?

Was today future day or something? They all had their pretty label, why couldn’t it be left at that?

Then she saw the look in her father’s eyes.

That was more than patience.

That was stubbornness.

The same stubbornness she saw in the mirror on a regular basis.

Nerves bounced so hard in her belly, they almost tossed her breakfast right back out her mouth.

Holy crap.

Was he going to talk about babies? Buying a house? Saving for college, retirement plans and oh, God, her getting a
real
job?

She swallowed hard, pressed a hand to her belly in warning and tried to smile.

Maybe it’d be easier if she got over herself and they talked about his health.

“Yes, dear. Your future. You and Aiden are going to get married. That means you might want to consider some changes.”

Oh, man.

Changes?

She loved changing things.

Her hairstyle. Her address. Her job. Her view.

But only when she was ready. On her whim, when the muse called, when she was bored.

“What kind of changes?” she asked tentatively, afraid to deny him anything.

“You’re going to be building a life together, you and Aiden. Considering your future. Now, I’m not saying you should live here, although Villa Rosa is a lovely town to raise a family,” he said, chuckling. He looked past her shoulder, casting an affectionate smile out the window at the distant view of the town.

She couldn’t quite smile back. Not with all those words swirling through her head. A family? The future?

“Shouldn’t Aiden be here for this chat?” she asked. He was trained to deal with scary stuff.

“No, no. I’m sure we’ll have many a chat, all three of us. But right now I just wanted to talk to you.”

Surprise shooed away some of the nerves in Sage’s stomach.

He’d rather talk to her than Aiden? She’d never felt slighted or overlooked in her father’s relationship with Aiden. Her place in her father’s life and his heart was secure and firm. But, still, this talk was about Aiden. Why wouldn’t her father want him included?

“Don’t you think that soon, after the two of you set the wedding date and make your decisions about settling down, that perhaps it’ll be time for some career changes?” the Professor asked, his smile in place and that bulldog look in his eyes.

Sage squinted, glancing at her laptop and its waiting article, then back at her father.

“I really don’t think I’m a career kind of person, Dad. I mean, I like writing my blog posts and stirring up attention. There are a lot of things that deserve that focus, after all. And the posts, the articles I sell, they are great. But that’s more of a hobby than a career.” She nibbled at her bottom lip, her fingers pleating the fabric of her skirt and she considered her last three or four jobs. “I didn’t much like retail, and while I’m a good barista, there’s only so much coffee I want to serve, you know?”

She waited, wondering if he had a new job or career option he wanted to suggest for her to try. Maybe something with flowers or outdoors. She just might like working with nature.

“I meant Aiden’s career, dear.”

“Oh.”

Ahhhh.

Sage blew out a long breath.

That’s why Aiden wasn’t included in this particular conversation.

“You mean Aiden being a SEAL? You’re worried about the danger?”

“Aren’t you?”

Sage opened her mouth, then closed it. She should be, shouldn’t she? She blinked a few times, trying to figure out why she wasn’t. Finally, she shrugged.

“No. I’m really not. I’m not oblivious to the dangers, but Aiden’s served in wartime and come through fine. I mean, he has a few scars here and there. And sure, his shoulder seems to ache a little when he first wakes up. But that’s the kind of thing any guy who’s led an active life would face.”

“It’s not quite the same as if he were playing weekends sports or putting in his forty hours a week on his feet, Sage. He’s jumping out of airplanes, diving under the sea, chasing down wrongdoers and operating under enemy fire.”

And all of that, except the enemy fire part, sounded wildly exciting. But clearly not to her father.

“I know,” she agreed quietly. “He’s an elite warrior. But that’s the thing, Dad. He’s been through some of the most intensive training there is. On top of that, he’s smart and careful.”

“Is that enough for you? Will that be enough to tell your children when their father is always gone? Gone, and you can’t tell them where?”

No. No, no, no. It was all Sage could do not to press her hands over her ears. Enough with the children talk. She felt safer thinking about Aiden jumping out of an airplane under enemy fire into the ocean than she did thinking about herself raising kids. As flaky as everyone said she was? She was positive Aiden was definitely better at being a SEAL than she’d be at being a parent.

“Dad, that’s way, way in the future. Why don’t we just get through Aiden’s leave, our engagement? You know, celebrate now instead of worrying about tomorrow.” Her toes twitched with the need to hit the floor and scurry out of the room. But she managed to keep her smile calm and cheerful.

The name of the game was making her dad feel good, she reminded herself.

“I know you’d rather not think about the future, Sage. I’m not advising you make plans and act on them today. I’m simply suggesting you begin considering your future. Thinking about what you might like it to be.”

“I’m great at dreaming,” she assured him, leaning forward to pat his hand. “I’ll definitely be thinking about the what-ifs and possibilities.”

There.

A comforting sort of vow that promised nothing. Her specialty. One that had always worked wonderfully in the past in answer to everything from her travel plans to her college plans.

“Ah, yes, you are a dreamer,” he agreed with a smile of his own. Noting the look in his eyes, Sage sighed. She leaned back against the wall and waited. Lecture, life lesson or well-thought-out suggestion. One of them was heading her way. Or, since he was looking particularly chipper, probably all three.

“I suppose you’re spending a lot of time dreaming about your future right now,” he pondered, crossing one knee over the other and wrapping his hands around it with a look of contemplation. “Not wedding contemplation, although I understand that’s a normal preoccupation for young engaged women.”

“The wedding is a ways away,” Sage reminded him, flicking her fingers as if shooing the calendar off her radar. “And I’m hardly the big-traditional-wedding type, Dad. It’s more likely that we’d send you a plane ticket to meet us on a beach for a sunset ceremony at the last second.”

She’d be wearing a sarong, with white flowers in her hair. Aiden would probably insist on wearing his dress uniform, but she was hoping she could convince him to go barefoot with it. After all, the soft white sand would feel so good on his toes.

“Just give me twenty-four hours’ notice, more if the trip requires inoculations,” he advised with a warm smile. “And since you clearly have that figured out, why don’t we discuss what happens after the wedding.”

Oh, God. Sage’s stomach dove into her toes and her pancakes curdled. Please, no. Not a wedding night chat.

“Where will you spend your marriage?”

She squinted. This wasn’t another wedding night chat angle, was it?

“You’re not going to want to bounce from station to station, are you? Waiting around, unable to actually see your husband because he’s off on a covert operation or dangerous top-secret mission?”

“Sure, why not? It’s not like I’ll be twiddling my thumbs or staring forlorn out a window.” Seeing the concern on his face, she searched her mind for something that might settle his mind. Oh, she had it. “I’ve got plenty of things to do myself. Actually, I just got an offer to expand some of my blog posts into a series of articles. The publisher has suggested I become a regular columnist for not only their online, but three of their print publications.”

“That sounds like a big commitment for you.”

Which was why she agreed to no more than a test period. She figured if in four months she wasn’t bored, burned out or disenchanted, she’d take their offer.

“Still, what are the odds of marriage success between two people who see so little of each other?”

“I’m not a settle-in-suburbia kind of girl. If I had to live in a nine-to-five existence, I’d go crazy. So for two people like Aiden and me? I’d say the odds are pretty good.”

If they were really engaged and in love enough to get married, of course. She ignored the ache in her heart and tried a cheery smile.

“For the short term, maybe. But long term? Don’t you think you’d do better if the two of you moved back to Villa Rosa? Here, Aiden can finish his degree, teach at the university. He can finally do justice to that brilliant mind of his.”

“I don’t think that’s what he wants to do, though.”

“But married life isn’t about what each individual wants for him, or herself, dear. It’s about the whole. Society is built on compromise and the greater good.”

“You might want to let the politicians know that,” she said with a teasing smile.

When he didn’t smile back, she let her lips droop again.

So much for a distracting clever subject change.

“Aiden is a brilliant man. I’m sure he realizes that marriage requires changes. And he loves you, dear, so he’s going to want to ensure that those changes make you, both of you, happy.”

“Uh-huh.”

“He just needs to know what you want, so he can begin making it happen.” Her father paused, the look on his face pure avuncular pride. She had no idea what she’d done to earn it, but for the first time in her life, it scared the hell out of her.

“But what if that’s not what I want?” she asked quietly, terrified that she actually might. How could she want a settled, boring, average life after years of chasing adventure and bliss?

“Think about your future together, about children. There’s so much for the two of you to experience. Wouldn’t it be better if you experienced it together?” Her father paused, then patted her hand. “Just think about it, darling.”

“Of course,” Sage promised, setting her bowl down and pushing her laptop away. Suddenly she wasn’t so hungry. Or interested in writing a brilliant and fun article that might cement her future.

* * *

“D
UDE
,
YOU
’
RE
INSANE
,” Gary panted, huffing as he tried to keep pace with Aiden.

“You didn’t have to come along.”

“Since you’ve spent the last week in bed with your fiancée, this was the first shot I had to talk to you. If I’d realized you were insane, I’d have waited until you were through.”

Not at all winded, Aiden easily laughed and slowed his pace to nudge Gary with his shoulder.

“I told you it was a ten-mile run. You said you do that three days a week. So what’s the problem?”

“I do it on the treadmill, in the air-conditioned gym, with the news on TV to distract me,” Gary muttered between huffs.

Aiden laughed again.

It was probably that week in bed Gary had mentioned, but Aiden couldn’t ever remember feeling this good.

Alive, energized.

Happy.

Running along a side road that was mostly dirt, while row after row of grapes lined up like good little soldiers in the fields beyond. Gold and green met the blue of the sky, a brilliant backdrop to a fabulous morning run.

He’d missed this.

He was relaxed here. For the first time, Aiden realized how much tension he always set aside when he came to Villa Rosa. Not because he didn’t have concerns or responsibilities, but because they were different here.

And the ones he had, they were shared.

By the town. By his friends. By Sage and the Professor.

This was the feeling, he realized, of being home.

Where he knew every tree and side road, not because he’d studied and memorized topographical maps, plotting attack and escape routes. But because he’d walked them hundreds of times. The people might not be his best friends, and he’d never count on most of them in a fight. But they all knew him, and he them. There was something comforting in that.

For a man who hadn’t been aware that he needed comfort, it was a weird feeling.

He shot a sideways glance at his running partner. He and Gary had played Little League together. They’d been in the same third-grade class, although Aiden had spent half of his time in the gifted program, and they’d been hard and fast recess buddies. There was a simple camaraderie here with someone he’d known most of his life. An easy acceptance.

His relationships with the other SEALs were tight. Beyond tight, given how hard they worked together, trained together. That they depended on each other for their lives. They were brothers-in-arms. Those relationships were unbreakable.

But they were short-term, too. Teams changed on a regular basis. New assignments, different missions.