Shadowborn (25 page)

I walked to the front of the platform and continued to scan the masses. Their eyes didn’t hold as much disdain as usual, more interest and curiosity. “I do want to be here, and I do want to know you. What makes you happy. What you’re afraid of. Whom you love.” My fingers fidgeted with the buttons on the sleeves of my shirt. “My life before coming here was difficult, and that makes it hard for me to trust anyone.” My eyes closed long enough to re-center myself. “But that’s no excuse. Not anymore. If you want to know me, I’ll answer any question you have, and I hope in time you’ll trust me enough to let me know you.”

Gallagher beamed from the corner of the dais like a proud father with a child who’d finally done something right.

My shoulders relaxed a little, and I managed to dredge up a smile. “Now I don’t have much time today because we have another threat on our doorstep, so I’ll get right to the point. As a show of goodwill between our people and the Unseelie, I’d like it if some of you would attend the king’s … ceremony tonight with me.” I coughed to cover the gag that wanted to follow the words.

“Are you ordering us to go, Lila Gray?” A tall, thin man stood at the back, wearing a pale gray suit and a red tie. Other shouts of agreement followed.

“No. I’m going to make this as plain as I can. Those who would like to go are welcome, and those who don’t are under no obligation. The Black City is amazing, and although it resembles our city in some ways, it’s a different world. Even if for curiosity alone, I think some of you might like to go with me. It’s entirely up to you.”

Murmurs broke through the crowd. Some fae turned to their neighbors in quiet discussion.

“Is this some sort of trick?” a woman with ruby-red hair asked. “You’ll offer us choice, but if we choose not to go you’ll have us banished?”

“No.” I met her glower with what I hoped to be an open expression. “I give you my oath nothing will happen if you choose to stay in Dun Bray.”

“Is it true you were there when Queen Arianne died?” That from a gangly man to my left.

I let out a shuddering breath as the sensory memory returned. I nodded. “My mother hid me in a passageway under the floor of a house and told me to run, but I didn’t.” Holding my fingertips up in demonstration, I continued. “I scratched my fingers raw trying to save her, but … Parthalan was too powerful, and I didn’t know about my ability then.”

Every eye pinned me in place, most reflecting interest.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save her—more than you’ll ever know. I couldn’t save any of them.”

Before I lost my composure, I uttered, “I’m out of time, so sorry. Good night,” and left the Court to a rising hum of voices. For once, I didn’t go away pissed off or disappointed. When I’d always thought those feelings were directed at the others in the room, it occurred to me they were at me for failing to take the time to become what I needed to be. For the fae. For the humans. For myself.

Would the elves think I’d done enough to earn my training? My fear of Parthalan had diminished, though I hadn’t resolved our bond. One evening of cards with my guards didn’t count as getting to know my people, but at least I understood where I’d gone wrong and what I’d been missing in my life. Let go of my guilt over the death of my family? No way. Not happening.

• • •

Ten minutes later, Gallagher, Nix and I went through the portal on our way to Freymoor and stepped out at Seven Gates in a blizzard.

The roar of the gale deadened all other sound. A tornado of flakes stung my skin. Although the cold didn’t bother me much, I was glad I’d grabbed an extra sweater before leaving. I hugged it tighter around me and headed into the gusts of driving snow.

“We’ll never see Alastair coming in this,” I shouted over the wind. “It’s dark enough everything is in shadow.”

“Then we must keep the Light burning,” Gallagher hollered back. “Make sure it overlaps so no darkness falls between us.”

We walked for what I’d worked out in my head to be miles when we came upon two headlights shining against the last portal along the wall—no more than fifteen feet from where we’d started.

Nix pulled the door of the dark sedan open, and we piled into the back seat. When I blinked the melting snow from my eyes, I found Cas grinning at me from the driver’s seat.

I poked Gallagher. “Why did you call Cas? I thought we weren’t going to put anyone else into Alastair fodder territory?”

Gallagher shrugged. “I didn’t call him. I thought you must have.”

The engine rumbled to life while Cas chuckled. “Liam knew you had to go to Freymoor today, Lila, and he couldn’t fly you himself so ….” Cas’s eyes wandered my body with innocent curiosity.

“So, he sent me you.” I reached over the seat and squeezed his shoulder. “Thank you, but you don’t have to do this.”

Cas sucked in a breath, and it came shuddering out. “You aren’t the boss of me, Lila, and if you don’t stop touching me, I’m never going to be able to drive this thing without getting us all killed.”

I wrenched my hand back. “Oh. Sorry.”

Cas shook himself and drove us into the blizzard. I found nothing more than a wall of white beyond the windshield. Did our young Cas have senses I didn’t know about? How did he know where we were going? Either way, I trusted him enough to close my eyes and empty my head for a while before having to face whatever the elves would put me through.

Nix slipped his arm around me and pulled me against his body, but instinct forced me to wriggle out of his grasp. He said nothing, only pressed his shoulder against mine. His warmth and pulsing energy lulled me into putting my head down on his shoulder. No matter how false his aura of safety might have been, I didn’t poke at it. Peaceful moments came few and far between in my life, and I’d come to cherish them.

My day was full of revelations. I took no time to ponder that little tidbit as I drifted off to la-la land.

22

“Lila.”

Something rough brushed against my cheek. Nix’s scent of summer wheat filled my nose. I sat up. “What’s wrong? Where the hell am I?” Blinking at three amused faces, I scowled when I realized we were still in the car but stopped. “Are we there yet?”

Cas broke out cackling, and the other two followed suit.

“What’s so damned funny?” After wiping my face and finding drool, I crawled over Gallagher and stepped onto a field of white. “Nice of someone to tell me I’ve slobbered all over myself.”

The others climbed out after me.

Thankfully, the wind and snow had died down. “With the time change in the Black City, how long do we have before we need to go home and change?”

“Hear that, Gallagher?” Nix nudged my royal aide. “She called Dun Bray ‘home’.”

Huh?
My brows crowded together. I’d called it home before. Hadn’t I?

“No, you have not.” Gallagher tapped his head, letting me know he’d been listening to me jabber on in my mind.

“I hate it when you do that.” That earned me a grin and a nod. I growled back.

“To answer your question, we have approximately seven hours before we must leave.”

He brought his yellow Light to the surface of his black flesh, and one by one, we each wore our energy like extra illuminated skins until we shone like a collective beacon into the dreary morning.

After going only a few feet toward the woods to Freymoor, Gallagher stopped. “Perhaps the young Unseelie should remain in the car.”

“I’m not leaving Cas behind … alone. You can just forget it.” I looped my arm through Cas’s and tugged to get him moving with me again. He loped along beside me like a giddy teenager. “And stop calling him an Unseelie as though it’s some sort of curse. He’s got a name, Gallagher. Use it.”

After a whole year of being in Dun Bray, I hadn’t even changed the attitudes of those closest to me. How I might bring the two factions back together still eluded me. The elves seemed to know everything else … maybe they’d have some pointers for me.

“Old habits are difficult to overcome.” Sighing, Gallagher resumed his course and fell into step behind us. “Forgive me … Cas. I meant no insult.”

“Yes, you did,” Cas said, “but I’m not one to hold grudges or anything.”

Despite the day that waited to smack me in the face, a smile crept across my lips. “You’re a good kid, Cas. I’m so glad Liam has you to watch his back.”

Chest puffed up like a strutting peacock, Cas grinned. “I try my best.”

“I know you do.” Remembering what Brígh told me, I squeezed his arm. “There’s someone I want to introduce you to.”

“Yeah?” Cas stumbled in the snow. Only my hold kept him upright. A red hue spread across his cheeks. “Who?”

“Oh, you’ll like her. She’s young, beautiful, and she’s got her sights set on you.”

Nix caught my eye from beside me, and he mouthed, “Who?” but I shook my head in response. I didn’t need my guard trying to talk unnecessary sense into our sweet Brígh before she had an opportunity to explore her feelings for Cas. They were right for one another. The tingling in my heart told me so. Perhaps that was the key to my people. Play matchmaker between the Seelie and Unseelie and pick them off one at a time. It would only take me the rest of forever to get it done.

No matter what happened in the future, I’d never believe my relationship with Liam was wrong. Nothing before him, nor after, had ever been as right. Nix came a close second. Life would have been much easier if I’d never met Liam, but I’d learned long before that I never did anything the easy way.

With our Light still blasting a pulsing globe around us, we continued across the field. A sweep of the area with the help of the Goddess’s Sight told me no one, neither Alastair nor anyone else, had concealed themselves in the woods. We were the only stupid ones to go venturing out on that blustery day.

Upon entering the safety of the trees, my unease ratcheted up instead of dwindling as it should have. Save for our footsteps crunching in the snow, the deadly silence didn’t help. Too much quiet invited thinking, and the only dark road my thoughts wanted to travel led me places I couldn’t bear to be.

I wished I’d talked to Brígh, to find out if she’d gone all squeegee about my third meeting with the elves. Although assumption was for losers, I couldn’t help but assume another horror fest awaited me—some test I’d end up humiliating myself over. Again.

Nix kept pace with me, his hands jammed into the pockets of his jeans. “You’re shutting me out. I’m worried I’ve done something, or you’re about to go off and play hero on me again.” He shook his head and uttered something drowned out by the shouting of my internal warning bells.

Clamping down even harder on my emotions, I turned down the path toward where the amulets would be. “I’ve just got a lot to think about, and I’m not thrilled about going back to Freymoor after what they did to me last time.” How many days ago had I gone there? It seemed like weeks, but … was it yesterday? “Not to mention I’m so tired I hardly know which way is up.”

Cas and Gallagher remained mute as they brought up the rear. I imagined them straining an ear toward us to catch our conversation.

We came upon four amulets hanging in midair.

“It’s beginning to worry me how much the elves seem to know,” Gallagher said before sweeping the forest like a guilty child lest someone had heard him.

“Way to piss them off.” Catching him, doing what he often chided me for, put a grin on my face. I took my amulet and directed Cas to the only one I didn’t recognize. It had a bat carved into the metal.

I squinted at him. “You can’t turn into a bat, can you?”

“Pfft. No.” Cas held the necklace away from his body. “But this is iron.” He scratched fingers through his plum hair. “I can’t wear this.”

Aiming a disgusted look at him, Nix slung his over his head and closed his eyes.

While I scowled at my guard, Cas put his on, and I followed. Nix and I were going to have a little chat when I didn’t have eight mountains filled with monstery goodness to climb.

The dizziness came in a gradual wave instead of slamming into me. Had I finally become accustomed to the elves’ methods of travel? Whatever had changed, with my lack of sleep and grumbling stomach, I was grateful.

The four of us materialized next to the fountain in the town square. To my relief, though, Laerni and Alogason stood before us in matching, emerald green robes that appeared as if they’d rolled around on moss until coated. Maybe they had.

Galati stepped forward wearing similar garb in more of a teal color, her moonlight hair swept up in a loose bun. She smiled, but it didn’t light up her honey eyes. Fear rolled off her like a choking fog.

“Welcome, cousins. Come.” Hand swept to her right, Galati ushered us toward the largest tree trunk where a white door stood open.

The other two elves never took their eyes off me. Even when I followed after Nix, their gaze burned into the back of my head. My mind ached and itched, while sensations like fuzzy caterpillars crawling through the folds of my brain made me scratch in a futile effort to relieve it.

I stopped and whirled to face them. “Get out of my head! I know it’s you doing that.”

They halted and continued to stare, approaching at a slow shuffle. I waited for the thunder to come, but nothing happened.

“I meant no offense.” Alogason gave a little bow, his green hair cascading down around his white skin, glowing in the muted light of the two moons. “The change in your mind in less than fifteen of your hours is … puzzling to us.”

Cas plunked a hand on my shoulder and squeezed. “Our Lila doesn’t do anything halfway. You’ll learn that pretty quickly hanging out with her.”

All eyes fell on the young Unseelie.

My eyebrow cocked up at him. “Do you even know what Alogason’s talking about?”

Cas shrugged, a grin quirking the corners of his wide mouth. “No, but I’m sure it was something nasty and damn near impossible to do, and you probably went right out no matter how scared you were, without anybody’s help, and did it, right?”

“Oh, geez.” I waved him off. “It wasn’t like that. And it was important.”

Nix opened his mouth, but Galati escorted him into the tree before he could speak.