Shadowhunter (Nephilim Quest Book 1) (2 page)

They had three wonderful months together, meeting in parks, and in his room, when they could. Her visits to him were as secret as she could make them, though sometimes she wondered if the other servants guessed.
 

One evening, when she was lying in his arms, nervously knowing that she was late and that she should have already left his little room in his boarding house, hoping that she could avoid his landlady again, that he looked into her eyes so intensely that she was almost scared.
 

"There is something you need to know about yourself," he said.

"About myself?" She did not understand.

"Yes. You are not who you think you are," he said, gently tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear, and kissing her softly under her jaw, in the place that made her gasp with pleasure.

"I'm not? Who am I then?" She smiled, trying to make a joke of it, but feeling apprehensive.

"We share a secret, you and I," he said and locked eyes with her, but there was none of the usual laughter in them, only tenderness and... fear?

"I know..." she tried to sound light, "if they knew what I have been doing with you..."

"It has nothing to do with this," he said, tracing her shoulder with his finger, "And yet it has everything to do with this. I have put you in great danger."

She looked at him questioningly, waiting for an explanation.
 

The explanation came in short, hesitant sentences, while he held her tight, as if fearing she would break from his arms and run away. It was not what she had expected. While the words came out, she listened mutely, stiff as a statue, not believing what he said. Not wanting to believe anything he said, because every word confirmed the fear she had been trying to escape all her life. Every pretence of her being normal was shattered forever, there in the shadows of the ordinary little room that had witnessed their deep love for each other.

"I think they have found me. I saw one of them in the park, but none yet near this house," he finally said, "It is not safe for you to be seen with me anymore. After tonight I have to disappear. And you must promise not to try to find me here. If I am right, they will be observing this location soon, and will follow anyone who comes here, to see if that someone could lead them to me. You must believe me - your life is at stake. Please, for the sake of our love, don't come back here. I shall look for you again, when it is safe. And trust me, I will find you." He kissed her again.
 

That was their last day together. The following day she looked for his tall, unmistakeable figure, but it was not at their usual place in the park. Nor the day after that. She wandered around the park, searching everywhere, but knowing in
 
her heart he would no longer be there. But she could not help herself. It took all the self-control she could muster to stay away from the boarding house.

And soon afterwards she found out she was with child. 

She managed to keep her pregnancy a secret for a few months, but because she was so tall and thin, it began to show sooner rather than later. She could not hide in loose dresses much longer, and before too long they would throw her out of the house. She could not let her parents hear of her shame.
 

But where could she go? No one would take on a maid who was pregnant and unmarried. And she would never return back home, to be mocked by the villagers.

"What's up, Beanpole?" The grocery boy appeared suddenly at the top of the area steps, although she had thought no one was around when she went out to catch some fresh air and fight the nausea that was now her constant companion. "Not enjoying your position in the fancy house with all the toffs?"

She could not help a tear escaping and quickly wiped it away, leaning slightly forward so her dress did not stretch over her belly.

"I guessed it. Them pretty gels are teasing you all the time, aren't they? You mustn't let 'em upset you. You know what - I might have a place for you, Beanpole. One that would suit you better. My sister just got married and moved out and it's her landlady, what now needs a maid to help her. She's blind, you see. You might even be able to live there without paying rent, if you'd agree to look after her. I know my sister did. You wouldn't mind working for a very grumpy old blind lady, would you?
 
The old girl's all right when you get to know her."

This time tears really began to fall. It was the answer to her prayers. An old lady who was blind!
 

"Tha.. thank you..." she managed to hiccup.
 

"There, there, gel..." the boy patted her hand, trying to appear older than his years. "And I've got news for you, too. I've got me call-up papers." He seemed proud and excited.
 

"Your - call-up papers? But - you're far too young to be conscripted!" Her own problems were forgotten for a moment.

"I'm eighteen, Beanpole. Just 'ad me birthday - so there we are."

"They won't send you overseas, though, will they? You're too young."

"Dunno. Have to wait and see. Well, aint you got a hug for a man what's going to serve 'is nation, Beanpole? Lovely scent you always have on, and I don't mean the smell of onions! I'd like to get a bit closer."

"Of course!" She felt a sudden rush of affection for him. He was so young. Absurdly young to fight.
 

He put his arms around her, not caring that his head only reached her chin - and immediately let her go and looked down at her belly in surprise.

"Put a bit of weight on round the middle, haven't you?
 
Oh Beanpole - you aint in the family way, are yer?"

She nodded, mutely, tears springing into her eyes again.

"Who was it, my girl?" He looked angry, "Who did this to you?"

"I can't tell you," she whispered, trying to wipe the tears that refused to stop running.

The boy stood there quietly for a while, and then nodded his head.

"Good thing the old girl is blind. Just you carry on for another day or two, and my sis will fix things up with the old lady. You try to keep your secret a bit longer, and you'll be out of here in a couple of days, if they'll let you go."
 

In two days she resigned and moved into the little house of the blind old lady. They made an agreement that she did not need to pay rent for her tiny bedroom, if she ran the household for her landlady. 

The old lady had been quarreling with her neighbors for so long that there was no danger of any of them popping in for a visit and seeing that the new maid was pregnant.
 

So there she stayed, working hard so the landlady would not throw her out. She hid her growing belly in a long thick winter coat whenever she went out, trying to find clues to where he had gone, visiting all the other places where they had met, hoping for a note, a message. The only place she did not go to was the house he had been living in. He would never have left her voluntarily, not with the feeling of deep belonging that they shared, so something must have happened to him. Had he died in the hands of those he feared so much?
 

She did not find any trace of him, and when her pregnancy became too obvious, she stopped going out. They blocked the windows with cardboard at night and she stayed indoors, hiding in the darkness of the blackout.
 

Shortly before she was due, there was a knock on the front door late one evening. She tried to keep her huge belly hidden behind the door when she opened it. There was the grocery boy's sister, carrying a big professional-looking bag. The woman smiled up at her.
 

"Step outside, duck, so the landlady won't hear," she said in a barely audible voice, "She has the ears of a bat, that one."

She reached for her winter coat hanging by the door, leaving the door slightly open. An ARP warden came round the corner, spotted the chink of light and yelled "Oy! Put that bleedin' light out!" Quickly wrapping her coat around her like a cloak, she stepped outside closing the door behind her. The grocery boy's sister opened the coat enough to take a look of her bulging form, measuring it with a pair of knowing eyes.

"Hmph. Yes, not long now. I'm Molly, as I think me brother told you? I've come to stay with you until the baby arrives and I'll help you with the labour. Some swine got you into trouble, eh, dear? "

At that she stepped inside and proceeded to greet the landlady with the pretext of having to stay in the city for a few days and asked if she could stop over for a few nights. The landlady agreed, perhaps convinced by some eggs brought as a gift.
 

Her labour started two days later, early in the morning. Soon, she was clutching her belly as the spasms began. She needed to get out of the landlady's house as soon as possible, so they hurried off, with Molly calling out that they needed to "get some bits and pieces of shopping." Molly walked with her to an empty house, supporting her when the pain made her lose balance. It was a smart house whose owners had gone to the country for the duration, and Molly had the key to it because her brother delivered goods here when the owners were at home, and she cleaned for them.

There, in the kitchen she gave birth to her daughter, helped by her unofficial midwife, who seemed to know exactly what she was doing.
 

"Our ma was a midwife and I've helped her plenty of times," Molly explained, "as well as her having seven of her own. And you are doing just fine, despite the pain. Hold my hand tight when you want, sweetheart, and don't you try to hold back - that includes screaming if you need to!"

The baby came out surprisingly fast into Molly's capable hands, though it felt as though she was being torn in two. She tried not to cry out because of the neighbours, but could not stay completely quiet. Luckily no one came knocking on the door.

The grocery boy's sister cleaned the tiny baby and wrapped her in a shawl she had with her, and when the afterbirth had come away, helped the new mother to her feet.

"Here are some pads for you to hide the bleeding. I'm sorry that you can't stay here. I'll help you back to the landlady's house, but you'll have to take it from there."

She looked down at her new daughter, and then at Molly.

"Do you really think she'll believe us, the landlady?"

"Dunno, sweetheart, but we have to try. Do you think you can walk now? That's a good girl. And little 'un's fine. Just fine. So pretty. One of the prettiest I've ever seen. Are you sure you don't want to see if we can find a new home for her, a good one?"

"No! I can't give her up, I can't!" The anguish she felt at the idea was beyond belief.
 

They carried the baby girl to the old lady's house, pretending they had found her on the street with a note on her saying the mother could not keep the baby.

"What? Someone abandoned a newborn on the street? I can't believe the morals of people in wartime!" the old lady said, clearly cross. "A foundling! What on earth do you intend doing with it?"

"Her," said Molly, "it's a girl. The baby is far too tiny to be taken anywhere else.
 
That's my opinion. She might not make it anyway. Might as well make her few days on this earth happy and comfortable - better than taking her to an orphanage, they're nasty places, them! She'd likely die there. She'll need constant attention, though. I've plenty of sisters and aunties, so I get lots of advice on how to take care of newborns. I'll see if they can help. Perhaps my brother could bring some bottle milk, if needs be?"

"It won't survive without mother's milk!" the old woman shook her head, "But I suppose we can't do much else. I'll give her a few days."

"Not a word though," said Molly. "You know how people talk."

Luckily the new mother had plenty of milk, and despite her tiny size, the baby hung onto life, sucking at her breast hungrily as she fed her in the privacy of her room.
 

"Well, well, well," marvelled the old lady, "I'd never have thought it possible that a newborn could thrive on anything other than mother's milk. Never thought to be learning something new at my age!"
 

Once it was clear the child would live, the landlady surprised them all by falling in love with the little baby. If the old lady suspected the truth, she was kind enough not to voice her suspicions. After the grocery boy's sister left, they were allowed to stay. Strange though her circumstances were, she found herself almost content with her baby and the old woman, who was now almost a substitute grandmother.
 

The connection between the new mother and her baby was so strong that she spent all her free time sitting by the cot, admiring her perfection. That anything so beautiful could have come from their love made her mute with gratitude. Looking at the sleeping baby she either felt such love her heart would surely burst or she fell to the pits of deepest despair, missing him so much that it hurt her, fearing what might have happened to him.

"I will protect her, I promise you," she whispered to the empty room one night when she could not sleep and was sitting guarding their baby. She gently stroked the unbelievably soft skin on her daughter's cheek. The baby did not wake up but a tiny hand wrapped around her finger. She could not take her finger away and sat there with hot tears running down her cheek, mumbling words of protection and love.

And then she began to see the shadows. At first she thought it was some problem with her vision. They seemed to follow her, slipping just out of sight when she turned to look at a movement she thought she had seen from the corner of her eye. Then, one day, the sudden noise of something clattering to the ground behind her in the street made her jump, and when she turned around quickly, she was certain she could see a shadowy figure behind the fallen dustbin, just for a few seconds.
 

Now she was certain they were real creatures. What her lost love had told her about the ones that were after him made her very scared, but why exactly these shadows should be following her, she did not know. Were they trying to find him through her? Why had they not shown up earlier, if that was the case? How had they found her? What were they looking for?