Six (25 page)

“Here I thought you were against me,” Liam barks, his eyes dancing between his deceptive blue and bright white.

“I am,” she answers. “Tell them,” the sorceress says while she floats in between us. I see the moment when Liam finally cows. He wants his palace more than anything else. It is the one thing he would never sacrifice. It is his pride. It is his only identity.

“I release Finnegan White and Emmalina Weaver from any and all decrees and challenges they hold with the witches and the Dark Citadel. You are free to live where you please. You are free to do as you please without fear of retribution from me or from my personal savage guardians and witches. I am seldom this lenient,” Liam says, as he shoots a feral look to our gilded savior. “So I suggest the three of you leave this place immediately.” He weaves a large dark orb in his hands and extends it into the shape of a doorway. I see the forest that surrounds our circle on the other side. It beckons. Happy tears spill down my face faster and faster.

I know it cannot be this easy. My five emotions course through my body like fire.

“What will happen to Lana? You say we are free, but what of Lana?” Finn asks before I have a chance. The sorceress did not take toll from Lana. The dark witches did when they brought her to the palace. This realization frightens me. Liam and Lana have a brief exchange of words out of earshot, and then Lana joins us in front of the door. Her expression is unreadable, though I sense a hint of sadness.

“That’s Lana’s business, nosey rats,” Lana says. “Well? What the hell are we waiting for?” she asks, her previous emotion all but erased.

I glance back at the sorceress one last time just to glimpse her genial aura.
Everything will be okay.
She beams the message into my mind. One look at a scathing Liam and I know I must trust her and her abilities to predict the future.

She is just like a fairy godmother,
I think when my mind automatically compares her alongside the one from my story.

Lana pushes Finn and me closer to the glistening orb and follows behind.

“
Yippy-ki-yay
-mothafuckas’, time to go home!” Lana screams as we morph into pliable, magical putty to exit through the orb-turned-door.

Lana’s profanities never sound sweeter.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

July 28th, Morning

Lana and I sit in our little house in our circle. The relief I feel at being home is immeasurable. My emotions are still roiling, so sleep is impossible even though I do not remember the last time I have slept. Disbelief is what I feel at being able to leave the abandoned city unscathed. The sorceress has given me my life back. She has given me a chance at a full life—not just a full life, but a feeling life. I no longer look to the future with senseless dread surrounding my fate. It is not a matter of if I will ever feel love, it is a matter of when. I will have six. My friends are safe. At least for the time being.

Lana tosses and turns on her bed, too wired to sleep. “I can’t believe he left the second we got here. Seriously? What a prick. I hope you hold out on him when he gets back, Emma. Remember our games with acting? Amp up the volume and make him curse the day he ever met you,” Lana says while looking at the ceiling.

Finn leaves as soon as we return to the circle. He says he has to straighten out business transactions with the other circles. He wants to make amends now that he is free as a darkling and from the decree. His mechanical skills will eventually pay off any resentment the other circles have over Louis’ death. Watching him walk into the forest, away from me, is painful. I want nothing more than to lock him somewhere and keep him in my sights for days. The wistful kiss he placed on my lips when we parted promised a reunion to remember. With the decree destroyed nothing stands between us. My imagination churns with all the possibilities.

Lana refuses to talk about Liam and the challenge she is bound to. She only says
it is worth it
to her. She also says that because the sorceress is a mystic and can see the future, there is no point in fighting it. “What will be, will be, bitches,” she says. It is an unnerving sentiment. Because she is fearless she also cares little about what will happen in the future. Our current conversation as evidence, she is worrying about my relationship with Finn, above anything else.

I lie back on my threadbare bed and fold my arms behind my head. “You know I can barely resist him,” I say, sighing dreamily. Lana is no longer charmed by Finn, a fact that relieves me and makes me wary at the same time.

“You’re lucky, you know? I wish I could fall in love. All darklings do. I bet it’s better than anything else,” Lana says. Her serious, very-un-Lana words hang in the air.

I know I am lucky. I get a second chance at a life I did not know existed. Lana has always felt love. It is the reason she gave me a chance that night in the woods so long ago. I was an empty shell and she took me in. I think her the lucky one.

I turn my head to look at her. She is balancing a brown sack on the tip of her boot. She sees me watching and somehow knows where my thoughts have taken me. “I knew you’d come around. I believed in you. When I saw the way Finn looked at you that very first time…it sealed the deal for me. He’s had a shit time of it all these years. It’s hard to feel bad for his situation with the using and abusing of all the darkling women, but I saw through it. He was a miserable asshole until the lip-chewing, blue-eyed actress wandered into our forest,” Lana declares. She kicks the sack up and catches it on her other boot.

I wish I saw
her
memory of the first time I met Finn. I do not remember anything spectacular in how he looked at me that first time, but then again, I was not looking for it. I did not care. Now, I do care. My heart feels like it may explode out of my chest. I twirl the charms on my necklace between my fingers remembering the day at the lagoon, picturing the moment of clarity when I feel joy for the first time.

I sit up on the bed and realize a few small tears are trickling down my face. “She wanted this for me, Lana. My mother. She didn’t know that my father was a dark witch,” I sob, remembering Liam’s orb with her memories intertwined with mine. I realize the witch that brings nothing but torment did give me something precious—a piece to my puzzle.

My mother eventually knew I was not like her, but then it was too late. She did what she thought would save me. She readied me for my fate with Liam while making plans with Finn as a back-up strategy. There was also the fact that she never let me lose fear. The one emotion that seems so horrific was the one that made me run in the first place. I fault her choices no longer. I grieve for her death, and now I mourn her loss of love.

“I think I feel love in pieces,” I tell Lana.

She saunters over and sits next to me on the bed. She wraps her arm around my shoulders and pulls me into her chest. I cry tears of happiness and sadness at the same time. I pull back and look at Lana and notice that her silvery eyes are watery.

She smiles sadly. “You are a piece,” I tell her
. A big piece. The most exquisite piece in my beautiful combination of pieces.
A tear sneaks down Lana’s cheek. She does not brush it away. She does not try to hide her emotion. She wears it proudly, beautifully—perfectly. Lana represents everything I hope to become.

She leans in and presses her forehead to mine. “I know,” Lana whispers. “I always will be. Remember that.” I want Lana to be a part of my life forever.

“I will,” I say. We cry until our tears run dry—until the gray haze darkens and night comes. We talk about everything and nothing. Bec comes in and I tell my stories of the old world. I try to animate the tales, I urge my stories to take on a life form of their own. I want my stories to make up for the dreadful, unfeeling person I used to be. I can never repay them for their misplaced kindness, but watching their smiling faces gives me hope. One day they might forget about my glowing eyes and detached demeanor when I arrived in their circle.

Out of habit, I glance out my window. I see movement and move in for a closer look. Finn has returned and he paces, his arms folded behind his head, eyes down to the ground. His black long sleeved shirt stretches tight across his muscled chest. His dark brown hair is wet and slicked back from his forehead. His eyebrows crease with worry. His hands fist, his chest visibly rises and falls at a harried pace.

I watch his apprehensive stride back and forth several times before I decide to go to him. I know what his reservations are. I worry about the same things. We can finally be together in all ways. It is the epitome of everything I never thought I would have. Surely he never thought he would have it as well. Since the day he was old enough to understand, relationships were never something he could embrace. Thinking, I know we both are getting something we never thought possible. Flutters fill my stomach and erotic images mix with tender ones. It seems I may combust.

Lana and Bec stand behind me watching the beautiful, worried man pace like he is heading for a death sentence. “By the witches, look at how riled up he is,” Bec says.

Lana laughs. “He’s like a teenager on prom night.” Lana claps me on the shoulder.

She is referring to a story from the old world—my mother’s story of her own prom night. She did not spare any details when she told me the tale for the first time. She told me about the puffy, shiny dresses and the awkward dancing, which was more like a forced swaying. She spoke of sweaty-palmed boys that expected things after paying for all of the prom paraphernalia. A lump forms in the back of my throat. I turn and look at the girls with wild eyes.

“Just go, Emma. It’s so not a big deal,” Lana says. “Remember if all else fails, use your tongue.”

I push past her playfully as I head for the door. I hear her laugh behind me and shoot her a huge grin over my shoulder. Bec bites her lip and then bursts out laughing. My smile does not fade when I step outside, though I am acutely aware of my clothing choices. The lagoon was our first stop after Finn left. My hair, with the soot washed away, smells of homemade soap and waves down my back. I wear an old but clean shirt and black pants that hug my curves. I feel like myself, I am comfortable.

As I walk toward Finn’s house I see darklings staring and it disconcerts me. Though their faces are friendly and some even smile and wave, I know they do not fully trust me the way Bec and Lana do. It will take time and patience, and I am okay with that because I know what I am and what I am not. I am a part of this circle. I wince when I think of how many days I cut this same path to Finn’s house. Except then, I was clutching a bleeding palm to keep my dark magic buried, terrified I would harm someone without my consent. They were torturous days when pain was what got me through because my emotions faltered. I suppress a shiver.

When I reach Finn’s door I sigh, thinking Lana could have taught me how to better deal with my insanely fluttering heart. I paid attention every time anyone spoke of relations with male darklings, but this, what Finn and I have, is so different from that. I pull my hair over my shoulders and blow out a huge breath. I do not bother knocking, I open the door quickly and shut it behind me. Finn stops mid-step and looks shocked to see me.

Suddenly, I feel out of place—like maybe I should have let him come to me when he is ready. I think he might have changed his mind. About us. About what he wants for us. Forever is a long time. I inwardly chastise myself for assuming.

I fidget with my hands, a human gesture that I now have no control over—no acting now. “How was your trip? I saw you,” I say. My voice sounds awkward, which serves to make me even more anxious. “You are pacing like you are nervous,” I add. I take a step forward. Finn exhales. A lock of hair falls into his eyes. I still see him sweep his gaze from my face down my body and back up again. His lips form an
O
as he blows out another deep breath. He scrubs both hands down his face then puts his hands on his hips.

“My trip was fine. I’m back and alive…for now,” he says. He swallows audibly. “I’ve been imagining this in my head for so long—you and me together. Embarrassingly enough, I’ve fantasized about it from the very moment I laid eyes on you,” Finn says, voice low and gravelly. He shoots a cautious glance around the room, as if he is worried someone might hear him. “I know I said I wanted to be in love with you, but with absolutely nothing stopping us, would you mind very much if we made love right now? I can’t stand this feeling anymore. Some people have sex because they want to, or they feel like it, but how I feel about you is different. It’s beyond a need. I feel like I might die if I don’t make you mine. I’m going crazy. I want you, Emma. I want
all of you
. Right now.” I see it on his face, how much this costs to ask. He thinks I will turn him down, like I do not feel the same way about him. I laugh because his sentiments match mine and we are on the exact same page.

I watch his shoulders relax and spy a glimmer of hope in his silver brown eyes. “You are wrong about one thing. There is something stopping us from making love right now,” I tell him, a smile on my face. His lips purse and his forehead crinkles with concern. He walks up and grasps a strand of my hair in between his fingers. It causes my smile to widen and my stomach to flip—completely over.

“What?” he asks, genuinely scared I will refuse him. I hike my thumb to his window. His head jerks to look out the window.