Smoke and Fire: (4 page)

Kinsey scrolled through the file. “I’m sorry. I was hoping we wouldn’t find her, but from what I’m reading, she was very good. Almost as good as Henry, from what her reports state.”

“Henry is one of the best.”

“How do you know he’s not spying on you?”

Ryder rolled his chair next to hers. “We don’t allow just anyone into our home. Do you know when Esther was decommissioned?”

“She was with MI5 since she was eighteen. It seems they recruited her right beneath Henry’s nose.”

“He’s no’ going to like that.”

Kinsey wouldn’t appreciate it either if it were her sister. She’d be furious enough to want to take physical action against such people. “They practically put her in the field immediately. She had less than a few months’ training before she was working as an undercover agent.”

She scrolled through some more while she and Ryder read. Most of it was about her missions and how well she did. Her superiors all raved about her ability, comparing her to Henry on multiple occasions.

“She just stopped working,” Ryder said when they came toward the end of the file.

“There’s nothing more.” Kinsey checked to make sure nothing was hidden. “Just her last mission, and then she was decommissioned.”

Ryder’s frown deepened. “What was her last assignment?”

A sick feeling came over Kinsey when she read, “Ireland.”

“Henry doesna need this.” Ryder shoved his chair back to his station and pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes. “He’s barely holding it together now.”

“What’s wrong with him? He looks sick.”

Ryder dropped his hands to his thighs and slid his gaze to her. “I guess you could say he is sick, in a way. He made the mistake of falling in love with a Light Fae. Her name is Rhi, and she’s a friend. We warned him to keep his distance, but humans can no’ help themselves.”

“Did she take part of his soul?”

“They didn’t have sex. They kissed, but that’s all it took for Henry to fall in love.”

Kinsey felt her stomach grow queasy from all the grease from the bacon. “Gotcha.”

“Henry has been searching for Rhi for months. He willna give up, and it’s only going to cause him more heartache in the end.”

Kinsey knew all about heartache. She’d spent months—years!—pining after Ryder. She understood all too well what he was feeling.

Kinsey had even tried to use her skills to find Ryder, just as Henry was searching the world over for Rhi. Oh yes, she could sympathize with him on everything.

“We can’t keep this from him,” Kinsey said. “He knows we’re looking into his sister. He’ll be here soon wanting an update.”

“It’ll likely do him in. I’d rather no’ do that to a friend.”

“And he’d rather have the truth,” she argued. “A lie will only prolong the pain. The truth is always better. Even if it’s difficult to say.”

Ryder released a long breath, his gaze going to the ground for a heartbeat. “I wanted to tell you who I was, Kins. I’m sure you doona believe me, but I did. I wanted you to know everything.”

“Then you should’ve told me.”

Regret filled his eyes. “I couldna.”

“You knew me, Ryder. You knew I’d never have shared such information.”

“It doesna matter. We have a code for a reason. It might seem senseless or trivial, but had you endured the war with the humans as we did, you’d understand.”

She leaned back in her chair as she stared at the picture of Esther North. Would they bring her to Dreagan if she was in danger? Henry was their friend, so they might very well do just that.

It made Kinsey think about her talk with Lexi and Thorn that morning. There were other women at the manor. Several, in fact.

“Tell me, did every Dragon King wait until they were mated to their women before they showed them who they really were?” she asked.

The silence lengthened between them. Kinsey didn’t look away from the monitor. She didn’t want to see Ryder’s face or any emotions that he might try to hide.

Her heart thumped in her chest, and her blood iced with nervousness. Because she knew the answer. She only wanted Ryder to admit it to her as well as himself.

Tears stung her eyes. She hastily blinked them away. Hadn’t she been good enough for him? Wasn’t their closeness enough?

The night she came home to find the note on the table she had been going to tell him she loved him. Kinsey could still feel the hollow ache in her chest from discovering he’d left her.

She had fallen to her knees, the paper crushed to her chest as she cried. Desolation, despair. Anguish. She’d been bombarded with those emotions, battering her until she was no longer strong enough to stand against them.

Her world turned gray and bleak. When, days later, she managed to pick herself up and try to find Ryder, she found no trace of him.

Ryder hadn’t been the first man to end a relationship with her, and Kinsey had ended her fair share as well. But it was the sheer depth of her love for him that affected her so deeply.

It wasn’t until that moment when she finished the letter and comprehended that he was gone that she realized how fragile a heart could be, how profoundly she could love.

How acutely she could hurt.

Three years later, that pain remained. It became a part of her, closing around her heart, blending with her muscle, sinking into bone.

It molded her, shaped her.

Changed her.

And yet it teased her from time to time in her dreams with memories of Ryder. Or worse—hints of what her future could have been with him.

How callous a heart that once loved could be. It hardened to keep anyone out, then cruelly opened the door in dreams to remind her how vulnerable she truly was.

Deep within her frozen heart was a tiny kernel of hope that continued to live. It was dying a slow, agonizing death though. When it was gone, Kinsey would finally be free of the heartache that lingered.

“No.”

She blinked and frowned when Ryder’s word reached her. It took her a moment to remember she’d asked him a question. So he finally admitted that the other Kings hadn’t waited to tell their women who they were.

It was a victory for her. Why then did it feel like the worst defeat?

“I doona want to lie to you anymore,” Ryder said.

Kinsey sat up in her chair and placed her fingers on the virtual keyboard. “That’s reassuring.”

“I’ve hurt you again.”

She snorted and shot him a flat look. “I knew the answer before I asked the question.”

“You wanted me to admit it.”

“Of course.” With a punch of a key, she moved her search to another monitor. There she began to dig into Kyvor’s servers. She might get lucky and find something in an e-mail, because people were just that stupid sometimes.

Ryder turned to face her. “You’ve changed.”

“Time changes everything.”

“I did this to you.”

Kinsey stopped typing. She then slowly turned her head to him. “Yes, you hurt me leaving the way you did. But I’m not some broken thing you can claim and fix.”

His brow furrowed. “That’s no’ what I meant.”

“It certainly is. As you’ve said, you’ve lived for millions of years. You want to be the hero to the damsel in distress, but let me be the one to burst your bubble. I’m not a damsel, and if I were in distress, I could save myself.”

His hazel gaze stared at her a long time. “I’ve always known that. It was your strength of character and soul that drew me.”

“Then you needn’t worry about me.”

“It’s my nature.”

She shrugged, hating that she liked that he might actually feel concern for her. Responsibility? Definitely. But to have him troubled over her was something she hadn’t expected.

And greatly enjoyed.

That flare of hope within her heart brightened briefly. Kinsey refused to acknowledge it. Ryder wouldn’t get close enough to hurt her again. Ever.

“You didn’t tell your friends I had family,” she said.

Ryder mumbled something beneath his breath. “Who asked?”

“Thorn.” She lifted her chin then. Though she didn’t stand a chance against Dragon Kings or the might of Dreagan, she still said, “Let me be perfectly clear. No one here, not you or Con or anyone else, is going to threaten my family.”

Ryder gave a nod of his head. “You have my word.”

How much was that worth now? At one time, Kinsey would’ve believed anything he said. Now, she knew his focus was Dreagan and all those who lived there.

Everyone else was on their own.

Chapter Sixteen

Dark Fae Palace

Ireland

For every hour that Balladyn was away from Rhi, he felt as if a millennia passed. Taraeth kept Balladyn by his side, as if the king of the Dark knew Balladyn wanted to leave.

“You’ve had something on your mind,” Taraeth said as they walked side by side down the wide corridor from the king’s throne room to Taraeth’s private sanctuary.

They turned the corner and Balladyn saw into one of the many vast rooms where the Dark congregated. He spied Mikkel and the female Dark sent by Taraeth to spy on him. “I’ve told you my thoughts on your alliance with both Mikkel and Ulrik.”

“You don’t think I can handle the situation?”

Balladyn clenched his jaw when he heard Taraeth’s voice dip deep in aggravation. It was time for Balladyn to do damage control. “Never, sire. We’re dealing with two Dragon Kings, both of who want Con’s position.”

Taraeth halted, the guards following instantly fanning out to give him room. He took a step closer to Balladyn. “Mikkel was a Dragon King for only a few minutes.”

“With Ulrik’s magic bound, hasn’t he been the King of the Silvers the entire time though?”

“Mikkel sure thought so,” Taraeth said with a smile. “But I’ve recently come across some information.”

Balladyn wasn’t fooled. He knew exactly who that information came from. “Ulrik actually shared such knowledge with you?”

“I can be very charming.” Taraeth’s red eyes crinkled in the corners as he smiled. “Truth be told, I think Ulrik has about had enough of the leash Mikkel keeps tightening.”

“Ulrik would’ve never told you anything he didn’t want to get back to his uncle.”

Taraeth absently rubbed the nub of his left arm. “What Ulrik told me anyone could figure out if they but took a moment. Mikkel is too power hungry to even contemplate the fact that he might be in over his head.”

Balladyn studied his king. “So you’re going to side with Ulrik?”

“I didn’t say that. Now, if Ulrik had all of his magic back, perhaps.”

What if he did? Balladyn thought about how easily Ulrik had snuck up on him. No Fae could do that. The Dragon Kings had been able to do that on a few occasions.

Which meant that in order for Ulrik to perform such a feat, he had all his magic back. Taraeth and Mikkel didn’t know. Ulrik was keeping his secrets close, which was the only way he would come out ahead in the end.

But why lie? Why not tell—or better yet, show—Mikkel that he was back in charge? Because if Ulrik had his magic returned, he could speak to his Silvers locked on Dreagan. And if he could wake his Silvers, then he could start the war with the mortals once more.

Balladyn was more curious than ever as to what Ulrik’s plans were. Though Taraeth might not be willing to pick a side, Balladyn already had. Ulrik’s.

He gave a shrug to Taraeth. “You’ve still not told me what Ulrik shared.”

“Hungry for information to use against our enemies?” Taraeth asked with a laugh.

“The more knowledge we have, the better.”

Taraeth looked him up and down before he began walking again. Balladyn fell into step beside him as the guards surrounded them. He waited for Taraeth to speak, but they continued in silence.

It wasn’t until they were in Taraeth’s private chambers with guards posted outside that he sat on the red velvet sofa and motioned for Balladyn to take the other.

“I wish we would’ve been here when the Kings were at war with the humans,” Taraeth began. “We would’ve been able to see firsthand what happened with Ulrik.”

Balladyn rested both arms on the back of the sofa and stretched out his legs, his ankles crossed. “We know what happened.”

“We know the story. Mikkel doesn’t even know all of it. He wasn’t there to witness everything. He saw Con and the other Kings bind Ulrik’s magic. That’s how Mikkel became a Dragon King. The power of the King reverted to the next strongest Silver.”

Balladyn nodded. “The Kings already had four of the largest and most loyal of Ulrik’s Silvers put into sleep and caged on Dreagan.”

“Exactly,” Taraeth said with a smile.

Balladyn chuckled then. “Con made sure that even if the Silvers woke, none of them would be able to become a Dragon King.”

“Which is why Mikkel was only a King for a short time. He desired to be King long before Ulrik took over from his father. Mikkel thought it should’ve been him from the beginning. He’s always hated Ulrik for being stronger and more powerful. Mikkel believes he has Ulrik at a disadvantage, and as long as that’s in place, Mikkel will use it to his advantage.”

“What happens when Ulrik gets all of his magic back?”

Taraeth shrugged. “Mikkel says he has a plan in place. Once Ulrik kills Con, then Mikkel will kill him. As soon as Ulrik has all of his magic unbound, he’ll once more be King of the Silvers. Nothing will be able to stop that. Nor will Con be able to bind Ulrik’s magic again.”

Balladyn inwardly smiled at Ulrik’s cunning to make everyone believe his magic wasn’t fully unbound.

Balladyn wanted to test his theory. Taraeth could hide a lot of things, but if he had a secret he believed no one else was aware of, he liked to gloat about it.

“What if Ulrik’s magic is unbound? What if he’s faking it?”

Taraeth laughed loudly. “Look at Ulrik, Balladyn. He was King of the Silvers for thousands of years. Do you really believe he’d sit by and continue to allow Mikkel to use him if he had his magic? More than that, do you really believe Ulrik wouldn’t attack Con right away?”

“He’s waited thousands of years for his retribution. I think he’s planned it down to the last detail.”

“Without a doubt. It’s going to be a glorious war, and we have front row seats.”

It was Taraeth’s certainty that he would remain king of the Dark, as well as his conviction that he didn’t have to choose between Ulrik and Mikkel that told Balladyn it was nearly his time to take over.