Smolder (23 page)

Despite
the drama with Jagger last year, I loved each and every single member of
Eternal Down and they’d become my brothers just as Olivia and Shona had become
sisters. I loved every one in this big, crazy, wonderful rocker family of ours
and nothing in the world would ever break us apart, even if we’re the ones at
each other’s throats. I knew that there would be fights but we’d always make up
with each other because that’s what families do; you stick together through the
good and the bad. However, despite how much I loved everyone, no one held a
candle to Jude.

He’d
been my best friend, my protector, my lover, and my friend. He’d made me laugh
harder than anyone and was one of the first people to truly break down my
resolve and make me cry. He’d celebrated all of my highs and held me through
all of my lows. My whole life was this man and if we lived ten thousand
lifetimes together, it would never ever be enough time to show him how much I
loved him from the depth of my soul. I knew I was still young but I also knew
that it was a rare thing in life to fall in love with your best friend. I never
thought when I was growing up as a poor kid from a rough part of the projects
and Cincinnati that I’d ever be truly happy in life, much less making a living
doing what I’d always dreamed of doing and being married to my dream guy.
Despite living through one of the hardest times I’d ever faced in my life, I
had nothing but a bright future ahead of me and I knew as long as I had my
amazing husband by my side, life was going to be pretty fucking awesome and if
it took a left turn, I’d fight like hell to keep it on the straight and narrow.
After all, that’s what Rebels do.

Three
Years Later

Jude

This
was pure torture. I paced up and down the hallway as I waited impatiently for
someone to come and get me. I knew there was no way in hell Sadie would let me
miss this, but I was still nervous. My wife was about to give birth and I was
ready to come out of my skin with anticipation.

I
stopped and leaned against the wall as I waited for someone to take me to my
wife. Sadie was in the operating room being prepped for a Cesarean section so
she could safely deliver and I was a complete nervous wreck. As elated as we
both were to finally start our family, I was terrified that the love of my life
was about to go under the knife in order for that to happen. Sadie was my rock
and even though I knew she was in safe hands with Dr. Mitchell, nothing was
helping my worry subside.

We’d
been trying to get pregnant pretty much since we reconnected after losing the
baby and even though trying to conceive was fun, it had become stressful for
both of us when the pregnancy tests came up negative every month. After three
years we were almost at the point of doing in vitro fertilization but I had
suggested to Sadie that we take a break from trying to conceive for a month or
two and just relax and enjoy each other before we decided what to do. Well, as
luck would have it, relaxing was just what we needed because the next month we
finally had a positive pregnancy test.

To
say I was happy was an understatement. I knew that Sadie wanted to be a mother
and wanted to have my child more than anything in the world but the minute I
saw the pregnancy test, my love for Sadie grew so much that it almost made my
chest hurt.

Knowing
the woman I loved was carrying my baby was the most incredible feeling I’d ever
felt. However, when we went for the first ultrasound and found out that we were
having twins, Sadie was ecstatic and (after a short freak out moment) I felt
like there was no way I’d ever be happier than I was then.

Now,
nine months later, we were mere moments away from finally becoming parents to
either two boys, two girls, or one of each (Sadie wanted to be surprised). The
anticipation was killing me and I was about to rip down the OR doors if someone
didn’t take me to my wife. Luckily the sound of footsteps distracted me and I
looked up, hoping that it was a nurse but it wasn’t. Instead of being bummed
out, I smiled and knelt down as I saw a four-year-old Max running toward me
with his little arms out followed by Ryder and Everleigh, who was holding their
eight month old son Stone in her arms.

“Uncle
Jude!” Max called out as he ran right into my waiting arms.

“There’s
my buddy. How are you doin’, little man?” I asked as I picked him up and gave
him a hug.

“I’m
fine. Momma said you’re having babies today. Are they still in your tummy?” Max
asked me and Ryder chuckled.

“No,
silly boy, Uncle Jude isn’t having the babies. Only mommies can have babies in
their tummies. That’s where Stone was sleeping before he came out to meet us,
remember?” Ryder asked as he ruffled Max’s hair.

“I
‘member,” Max replied and giggled as I tickled his belly. “Momma’s belly was
big like a ball.”

Everleigh
smiled at Max and answered, “Yes it was but it had to be so there would be
enough room for your brother in there.” Stone squealed and patted Everleigh’s
cheek with his chubby hand and she kissed his little fingers before she asked
me, “So how’s Sadie?”

As
I handed Max to Ryder, I ran my hand over my head and replied, “Still being
prepped. I know she’s beyond ready to have these babies and so am I. I wish
someone would come back and get me already.”

Ryder
clapped me on the back and said, “You’re almost there, man, don’t worry.”

“Sorry
we didn’t make it before she had to go back but Max and Stone’s appointments
took a bit longer than we anticipated. We wanted to wish her luck,” Everleigh
stated.

“It’s
okay, but she told me to tell you both that the presents better be big,” I
answered, smiling a nervous smile.

“Oh
you know they will be. Did everyone else make it yet?” she asked, smiling.

I
nodded and replied, “Yeah, Kris and Jess brought Kallum by right before Sadie
went back and Beau was able to spend some time with her too. It was actually
sweet. Harlowe made her a ‘good luck having the babies’ card.”

“Did
you hear that, buddy? Harlowe and Kallum are here. Do you want to go and say
hi?” Everleigh asked Max.

“Yeah,
I want to go play!” he answered excitedly and Everleigh kissed me on the cheek
and wished me luck before Ryder put Max down and he followed his mother to the
waiting area.

Just
as Ryder was about to follow, a nurse walked down the corridor and called my
name.
Finally
, I thought, as he smiled and gave me a quick hug.

“Congratulations,
brother. Give Sadie our love and tell her we’ll see her after those little
heathens are born,” he said, and I barked out a laugh as I hugged him back.

“You
know it bro,” I said and after he walked away I followed the nurse back to the
operating room. As soon as I walked in, my eyes landed on Sadie lying on the
operating table and my heart skipped a beat. Her large belly was behind a big,
blue curtain and her long, snowy blonde hair was tucked neatly under a surgical
cap. I had to contain a smile as I thought of how pissed she probably was that
her always perfect hair was messy under a scrub cap.

“It’s
about time you showed up,” she said as soon as she saw me, grinning despite
being moments away from having a C section.

“Sorry
I’m late, baby,” I replied as I took my seat next to her, kissing her forehead.
“You look beautiful.”

She
rolled her big brown eyes at me and answered, “Oh sure. I’m a whale with two
monsters cramped up inside me. I’m just the picture of sex appeal.”

I
laughed and softly said, “You are to me, Sadie. You’re about to give birth to
our babies, about to make me a father and that’s something I never thought I’d
ever be. You’ve
never ever
looked more beautiful to me than you do right
now.”

Blinking
back tears, she whispered, “Oh Jude. I love you so much.”

“Love
you too, mama,” I said as I leaned in and kissed her forehead one more time
before Dr. Mitchell said that it was time to begin.

Sadie
flashed a nervous smile before taking a deep breath and saying happily, “Time
to meet our babies.”

I
reached up and cradled the top of her head and smiled at her as the doctor
began to make the incision. I was feeling everything I could possibly feel in
that moment. I was terrified for my wife and worried if our babies would make
it here okay, but the anticipation of hearing that very first little cry,
knowing if I had a son or a daughter, was giving me such an intense rush.

“Okay
Sadie, you’re going to feel some tugging while I get the first baby out,” Dr.
Mitchell stated. Sadie’s brows furrowed and she bit her lip as the doctor was
moving her arms around.

“Are
you okay? Does it hurt?” I asked, worried.

“No,
it doesn’t hurt. It just feels…I don’t know. Weird,” she said, giving me a
reassuring smile. “It’s all right, don’t worry, big guy.”

I
was about to ask her again if she was feeling okay but before I could, Dr.
Mitchell said, “Okay, I see a head…just one more second here…” and the next
thing I heard was the most amazing sound that had ever touched my ears…our
baby’s first cry.

“Congratulations,”
the doctor said happily as she lifted our first twin up so Sadie and I could
see at the same time. “Looks like you have a girl.”

Sadie
gasped and smiled brightly as tears began to roll out of her eyes.

“We
have a little girl,” she cried, turning her head to me before she looked back
at our daughter. “Jude, she’s amazing!”

All
I could do was stare open-mouthed at the perfect, innocent little angel that
was currently pink in the face and screaming at the top of her little lungs. Oh
my God; I had a daughter. In that instant I fell completely head over heels in
love with her and knew that there was no boy in the world that was coming near
her.

I
had to tear my eyes away as she was handed to a nurse so they could do their
assessment and as much as I wanted to go and see her, I knew that we had
another little one on the way out and I didn’t want to miss seeing him or her
being born.

After
a few agonizingly long moments, Dr. Mitchell announced, “Okay, baby number two
is out and…you have another little girl! Congratulations!”

When
she held our second daughter up so we could see her, I couldn’t control my
emotions anymore and I felt a few hot tears shoot down my face. I couldn’t
believe I would ever feel this happy. I was the father of two beautiful baby
girls and if it weren’t for the gorgeous, fierce, and incredibly bad ass woman
laying on the operating table next to me it never would have happened.

“Jude,
she’s perfect,” Sadie cried. “They’re both so beautiful.”

As
the nurse took our second baby girl to be checked out, I turned to my
breathtaking wife and leaned in to kiss her.

“More
than beautiful,” I whispered against her lips. “Thank you Sadie.”

“No,
thank you,” she answered, another tear rolling out of her eye and I wiped it
away. “You’ve made every single dream I ever had come true. I love you so, so
much.”

“Love
you more,” I whispered and kissed her lips. “So much more, princess.”

She
kissed my lips quickly and said, “You should go check on our babies. I bet they
can’t wait to meet their daddy.”

I
grinned at her and replied, “Not as much as I want to meet my girls. I’ll be
right back.”

“I’ll
be here,” she laughed and I kissed her forehead one more time before standing
up and walking over to where the nurses were taking care of the twins.

My
eyes glanced constantly back and forth from one daughter to the other as
several nurses examined them and made sure they were healthy. All I could do
was stare at the gorgeous little girls that my wife and I had made
together…they were absolutely breathtaking.

Our
first daughter had just a light dusting of white blonde hair on her tiny
head…just like her mother. Our second little girl had blonde hair as well but
it was just a bit darker and despite the difference in hair color, they looked
completely identical to me. Same button nose as their mother but they both had
my lips. I wasn’t close enough to see their eyes yet but I hoped they had
Sadie’s shade of chocolate. Her eyes were mesmerizing and could see deep into
the heart of anyone and that was the one thing I hope they inherited from her.

I
watched over my girls the entire time they were examined and as soon as they
were given a clean bill of health, they were wrapped in their little pink
blankets and two nurses carefully placed them into my arms one at a time. There
was no way to describe how it felt the first time I held our precious baby
girls for the first time. I was in love with both of them…pure, simple,
complete love.

As
I cradled my daughters and took them to meet Sadie, I looked at her staring
back with excitement in her eyes. I sat down next to her and held the twins up
so she could see them and the moment she looked at them she started crying
happy tears.